GRACE GILLESPIE - Garden Mind

Clematis climb
Upward in time
Step inside my garden mind
Rhododendron
Over again
Colour before you go

All our changes start to show
Step inside my garden mind and watch them grow

Rain or shine
Jagged lines
I can’t keep this love of mine
Step from the path
Nothing lasts
All before me glows

All our changes start to show
Step inside my garden mind and watch them grow

© 2021 Kaleidoscope
Ⓟ 2021 May Music Limited

Garden Mind

GRACE GILLESPIE - All The Yellow Flowers

All my luck is out, but I’ve a body of my own now
Time to fix the holes now, in the place I call my own
In this place I call my home

All my words are gone, but they have gone where they belong now
Echo empty shell now, I am all alone
I am all alone

It is done, it is what it is,
And in the sun, in the shadow I can just forgive
And for a love, for a fear, for a fantasy
I am done, I am gone, I am all I can be

Outside in the garden there’s a line of plastic chairs
Someone has been there, and into the past I stare
To the future I don’t dare

It is done, it is what it is,
And in the sun, in the shadow I cannot forgive
And for a love, for a fear, for a fantasy
I am done, I am gone, I am all that I can be

And all the yellow flowers turn their empty heads to me
What else can they see, but a death by small degrees
They have me on my knees

© 2021 Kaleidoscope
Ⓟ 2021 May Music Limited

All The Yellow Flowers

GRACE GILLESPIE - Human (Heart) (Clean Edit)

I’m only trying to tell you how I feel
I’m only human
I will keep it short and sad and sweet, surreal

I’ve only words and they can be meant
In cruelty, kindness, self-defence
Take a turn here for the worst you self-destructive mess

Hey hey, baby
You know this world is the sum of its beating hearts
Hey hey, and maybe you can love me

I’m only trying to get to know your worst
I don’t care for all of the rest
You’re in the back of my car
Smoking all my best cigarettes

So I lean back my head and I take a look
At the best of the bunch
Yeah you’re a good looking f**k
But you’re only human, only rubber soul and Airtex flesh

Hey hey, baby
You know this world is the sum of its beating hearts
And maybe, you could love me

Hey hey, do you think
That you could see me for more than the sum of my parts?
Then maybe you could love me

But you said that you had your life decided for you at seventeen
But are you going to stand there dying, deciding just what it is they mean?

Come on dance with me baby at the top of the hill
Nobody’s watching 
The whole world can’t stand still
Come on baby will you dance with me?

‘cos then I’m going to speed and drive far too fast
You throw back your head and you cry and laugh
You know the best worlds for life
Are written in its own epitaph

Hey hey, baby
You know this world is the sum of its beating hearts
Hey hey, and maybe, you could love me

Hey hey, do you think
That you could see me for more than the sum of my parts?
Hey hey, then maybe you could love me

© 2019 Kaleidoscope

Human (Heart) | (Clean Edit)

I'm Your Man

How long do I have to wait?
How low do I have to go?
How soon until you realise?
How long before I can close my eyes?

Hey baby if you’re looking for the kind of girl
Who’s living in the shadows under weight of the world
I’m handing you the keys with shaking hands

‘cos I’m your man
I’m your man

I tried to be cool and calm
In the chaos baby, in the troubled times
You know there’s nothing you can do
There’s nothing you can say
We’re already on our way

Hey baby if your looking for the kind of girl
Who’s waiting on the corner for the end of the world
I’m handing you my heart with shaking hands

‘cos I’m your man
I’m your man

© 2019 Kaleidoscope

Pretending EP

I'm Your Man

GRACE GILLESPIE - Take Me To The Country

Take me to the country, give me what I need
Put my mind at ease
Heaven help my body, it pulls me down so low
Is there some place I could go?

Take me to the river, take me to the beach
Put your love within my reach
Society is cruel, is there no place for me?
Am I not something you need?

	Are you giving up? If I knew where to begin
	I gave you my love, it couldn't sink through your skin
	And is it strange to let the darkness decide?
	Why does the day take so long to die?

Take me to the places that I cannot go
Show me where the truth blows
Give value to my words they're all we have to show
How precious little we know

	Are you giving up? If I knew where to begin
	I gave you my love, it couldn't sink through your skin
	And is it strange to let the darkness decide?
	Why does the day take so long to die?

	And is it strange to let the darkness decide?
	Why does the day take so long to die?

Take me to the country, give me what I need
Put my mind at ease

© 2019 Kaleidoscope

Take Me To The Country (Single)

Take Me To The Country

GRACE GILLESPIE - Goodbye

Maybe now it’s time to sell all my guitars 
See what’s left of me under the sea of tangled wires 
I’ve tried to see what you might see in me
All gone away I knew there’d come a day

But I don’t want to say goodbye
I’m not afraid of dying now I’m afraid to be alive
I don’t want to say goodbye
For what could I miss
More than this?

Maybe now it’s time to spin for life again 
See if I can stand to make an honest end
This place I love I have not been dreaming of
I’m wide awake I'll watch as my heart breaks

But I don’t want to say goodbye
I’m not afraid of dying now I’m afraid to be alive
I don’t want to say goodbye
For what could I miss
More than this?

But here I’ve made my bed
And from the ground the sky is bluer than I can forget 
But here no place to rest a heavy head
But I’m not tired I am not sleepy
I’m not broken yet

Maybe now it’s time to sell all my guitars
See what’s left of me under the sea of tangled wires

Goodbye

GRACE GILLESPIE - Your God's Within

Is this what it's all about?

Graceless lady
You don’t know who I am
Nothing can save me
Let me fall from your hands
 
Breathe in, breathe out
Breathe in breathe
That’s what it’s all about
 
Who’s got the silver?
Riding from the east
Sun in your eyes
Blind the beauty from the beast
 
Breathe in, breathe out
Breathe in breathe
That’s what it’s all about
 
Let it out, let it out, let it out
Let it out
Scream and let it out
Scream and let it out
 
And I’ll keep it in
Yes they always win
You know your God’s within
You know your God’s within
 
Breathe out, breathe in
Breathe out, breathe in
Breathe out
That’s what it’s all about

© 2020 Kaleidoscope

Your God's Within

GRACE GILLESPIE - HUH

I am a child
I do not know
Swing in the sunshine
Which way I don’t know

What is this life
from which we creep?
Into the darkness
Our love seeps

It’s so unlikely 
That you would find me
Outside the wind blows
No I will not go

HUH!

In your heart 
In your soul 
There’s a place 
You can go
Out of luck 
Out of line 
And I will still be swinging in the sunshine

What does your smile
mean to the world?
What can your lies 
do to this small girl?

I have a place 
You’ll never find
Hide in the confines of my own mind

It’s so unlikely 
That you cannot see
Outside the wind blows 
No I will not go

HUH!

In your heart 
In your soul 
In your mind 
Don’t you know
Out of luck 
Out of fear 
Well now you’ve done the damage you can disappear

In your heart 
In your soul 
Are you sure 
you are sold
on this life 
on this lie? 
You can watch it growing as the time goes by

© 2020 Kaleidoscope

HUH (Single)

GRACE GILLESPIE - After The Harvest Moon

Honestly, I’ve been taking my time
Shining my armour, rolling my blinds
Honestly, I’ve not made up my mind
All bets are off, like it or not
 
But under the summer sun
And under the winter moon
Your love is enough 
Not too late, not too soon
 
Honestly, I hope everything changes
Humanity goes through its phases
Probably we’ve been stuck in a jar
Trapped here by creatures from Saturn or mars
 
And under our glassy shell
And facing our certain doom
Your love is enough 
Not too late, not too soon
 
And with nothing above us and nothing below
Nothing to do and nowhere to go
Hang in the balance 
I love you just the same
Just the same (I love you just the same)
 
Honestly, I’ve been taking my time
Oiling my joints, writing my rhymes
Suddenly I’ve made up my mind
The penny has dropped, like it or not

But under the summer sun
And under the harvest moon
Your love is enough 
Not too late, not too soon

And waking the same old day
And sitting in this here room
Your love is enough 
Not too late, not too soon

© 2020 Kaleidoscope

After The Harvest Moon

GRACE GILLESPIE - For Nick Drake

You set your sights on some faraway shores
But it’s all there in your mind, you have all you need and more
And you left me in the basement learning finger-picked guitar
With Joni on the stereo and Bobby in my heart
 
And now I set my sails for a small whitewash house
And I suppose I’ll get to know what domestic life is all about
For I did not learn the poets but they’re burned into my bones
I’m ready for to meet them you can say I’m going home
 
So I howl for Allen Ginsberg
And I cry for Kerouac and Plathe
And for Dickenson and Angelou finally set free
And for Nick I will stand before the sea
Only silence for your sweetest tragedy
 
So I read from your back pages because I know the story well
Suspending my disbelief in your effervescent spells
And Neil on in the background, Alabama have you not learned?
And Peter Green my saviour, heavenly man of the world

So I howl for Allen Ginsberg
And I cry for Kerouac and Plathe
And for Dickenson and Angelou finally set free
And for Nick I will stand before the sea
Only silence for your sweetest tragedy
 
So I tried to live in lyric, I suppose a life like you
Gathering up words and trying to make them stand up tall and true
But poetry’s not dead, I saw her shiver in the draught
Nick I’m sorry they did not listen, you know it nearly broke my heart

© 2020 Kaleidoscope

For Nick Drake

GRACE GILLESPIE - Hoppers

Once for the waking and twice for the taking
I see we’ve opened up the third bottle now
Four broken tiles on the rooftop overlooked
And by the fifth bend I knew I had been misunderstood
 
So bye bye, baby, bye bye
I am just a fly, I’ll be buzzing ‘til I die
Bye bye, baby, bye bye
You are just a hopper, you are too afraid to fly
 
But I thought you were my angel
I thought you were my angel
In my half-light half-night eyes
We live by the same lies
 
Six times a lady in my seventh day dress
I see eight flames flicker on the cool chimney breast
Nine o’clock sharp I hear the smash of broken glass
And pick the ten shards sticking from my half-warm heart
 
So bye bye, baby, bye bye
I am just a fly, I’ll be buzzing ‘til I die
Bye bye, baby, bye bye
You are just a hopper, you are too afraid to fly

But I thought you were a devil
I thought you were a devil
In my half-light half-night eyes
We live by the same lies
 
So bye bye, baby, bye bye
I am just a fly, I’ll be buzzing ‘til I die
Bye bye, baby, bye bye
You are just a hopper, you are too afraid to fly

But I thought you were my angel
I thought you were my angel
In my half-light half-night eyes
We live by the same lies

© 2020 Kaleidoscope

Hoppers

GRACE GILLESPIE - Empty In The Capital

It is what it is
Not what it ought to be
Not exactly what you wanted
Not exactly what you need
But I am comfortable with knowing
That our consciousness is growing
Learning to destroy ourselves
And blame it on something else

It is what it is
Not what it used to be
Not the past and not the future
Something in-between
But I am comfortable with riding 
On the moving parts of time
Like I am comfortable looking
At the London skyline

But I am not myself today
What is it I’m doing?
What was it I wanted to say?
Yes I am grateful for the day
Just restless in the rationale
Empty in the Capital

It is what we are
Not what we choose to be
Cannot capture just the essence
Cannot pragmatise our presence
But we’re comfortable with living
While some other eyes are stinging
Like we’re comfortable with turning
Our faces to the sky

But I am not myself today
What is it I’m doing?
What was it I needed to say?
Yes I am grateful for the day
Just restless in the rationale
Empty in the Capital

Ahhh not we are not ourselves today
What is it we’re doing?
What was it we wanted to say?
Are we ungrateful for the day?
Just restless in the rationale
Empty in the Capital

© 2020 Kaleidoscope

Empty In The Capital

GRACE GILLESPIE - The Child

Don’t close your eyes
I’m dying to meet you
Let time decide
I’m ready now to greet you
 
And I know I must be
Strong and sure and safe and sound and wild
For the child
For the child in me
 
Reveal in me
The mastery I am missing
 And unearth this gold
What diamonds? What difference?
 
And I know I must be
Strong and sure and safe and sound and wild
For the child
For the child in me

© 2020 Kaleidoscope

The Child

London based singer, songwriter, multi-instrumentalist and producer.

Please drop me a line at: gracegillespiemusic@gmail.co.uk
Photos by Poppy Marriott

Grace Gillespie

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