Stuff I've done with my band, Clamourous Penguins :)

Burning Bridges

Song by @Mideion with vocals, remix and some layering by @greebo-1. Thanks to @purserj for his suggested edits and input!

This song is a dedication to someone who lost their fight with paranoid schizophrenia.

UPDATE: I updated the song and reduced the vocals. After listening a fair few times, this one  is just a bit too overpowering. Hope you all like the update :)

Lyrics:

I see us standing in our room, 
holding our child and I feel so lucky 
Feeling sure, I've got it in control. 
I don't need to fear myself

I see the light, I see the day 
I know this future is mine to make 
Gonna take this time, gonna love this life 
But in the back of my mind I'm scared of my rage

Without Warning

I see you standing by the door, 
I know you're gonna leave and I feel so angry 
Lost my cool, feeling like a fool, 
should have seen through all the shit you feed me.

Feel the rage, burning in my veins 
I really need now just to not explode. 
You try to say, that you won't go away, 
but I know better.

I feel the eyes, and I know this plot 
There is no shelter, no calm and I can't stop 
And I know it's sick, but I know I'm right 
Cos when you say you love me I want to hurt you

Feel the time slip through my fingers cannot trust my broken instincts 
Show a mask that hides my fears, but I still seethe inside 
What you see is what I show you out to get me I can beat you 
Here it comes, I'm not sure what is right

I see me sitting on the couch, holding you hand, 
Sorry how this all worked out 
I know that none of this is real, all my fears are whispers

I want to fight, this burning pain 
I want to be with you forever and be safe 
But I know this night, if I stay 
That you will be in danger, and it will come

Without Warning

Without Warning

Remix of Torture Fetish by @seroma with vocals. Original at http://soundcloud.com/seroma/torture-fetish

Lyrics (inspired by the song and title):

Remember the way you held my hand 
You told me you'd always understand 
Your fingers run across the skin you've maimed 
You've an obsession with my pain

We are nothing, we have nothing 
nothing but the static that we make 
We need nothing, we have it all 
We fill the void with worlds that we create

The heat as it melts across my skin 
And yet can I trust to let you in? 
Cos now although we're perfectly in sync 
The pleasure it makes it hard to think

We are nothing, we have nothing 
nothing but the static that we make 
We need nothing, we have it all 
We fill the void with worlds that we create

When you feel that you are empty 
When you need something to fall 
We can make this place safe for you 
We can fill it, with tools of torture

All you give me, I can take more

Torture Fetish (vocals remix - original by Mario Gonzalez)

This is a vocal remix of On We March (Silent Alarm - IDM Extended Mix) by Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross from the Social Network soundtrack and remixed by Emptiness.

It's one of my favourite instrumentals, so I hope I've done it justice :) The original instrumental can be found at http://remix.nin.com/play/mix?id=22369 or http://www.tumblr.com/tagged/on+we+march</a>

Lyrics:
I'm clear today. I'm calm, and I feel safe.
I packed the thought of you away.
It's quiet, and then you walked into my life.

Something sparks and something burns.
I feel my heart beat violently until it hurts.
I want this all to go away.
I can't seem to find the words I need to make you stay.

(Chorus)
Deep inside I march I can't ignore this beat.
You take a look inside and it's killing me, on my knees.
I need to find out if this cannot be.
The emptiness inside, it's filling me on my knees.

I ttry, to be, the way you seem to see me.
I want, whatever this may be to fly.
I need to see if it is real.

You open up, then I feel alive.
When we are in sync then I realise.
I want to touch your face,
I need to feel your skin.
But then you turn away, you won't let me in.

(Chorus)
Deep inside I march I can't ignore this beat.
You take a look inside and it's killing me, on my knees.
I need to find out if this cannot be.
The emptiness inside, it's filling me on my knees.

I try, to cut, the way that I feel out.
I need to shut the door you made.
I need a key, to lock my heart away, but...

(Chorus)
Deep inside I march I can't ignore this beat.
You take a look inside and it's killing me, on my knees.
I need to find out if this cannot be.
The emptiness inside, it's filling me on my knees.






On My Knees (Vocal remix of On We March, Silent Alarm - IDM Extended Mix)

The original of this is by @nardz who I know through a mutual friend, so I decided to write this song about our mutual friend who has undergone a huge person journey recently. Hugs to all :)

Original at http://soundcloud.com/nardz-3/dipla-idea

Lyrics:

Living on a cloud
I stay clear from the ground
Don't know my self, and so I keep this space

But eventually you see
I took a look at me
I saw I wasn't living my own life

But now that I see clear
My life is not my fear
It's possible to let something inside me

I thought I was a clown
That couldn't settle down
I used these words to shield me, an escape

And so I crossed the line
I broke it every time
And then one day I had to face the truth

But now that I see clear
My life is not my fear
It's possible to let something inside me

And I chose you
And I choose life
And I am feeling comfortable for the first time

Was on that cloud
Wouldn't come down
Thought I was free
But then I saw, illusion tore and I found me

Eventually you see
Eventually I see
Why did I try so hard
To push against my own heart

But eventually you see
I took a look at me
I saw I wasn't living my own life

But now that I see clear
My life is not my fear
It's possible to let something inside me

And I chose you
And I choose life
And I am feeling comfortable for the first time

Dipla (Vocal remix) - Original by nardz

A vocal remix of "Only Have" by @nancy-shin. I thought I'd have some fun with this one and write about Assassin's Creed, the game :) So this is one for all those gamers who found AC2 so much better than AC1 ;) After all, Ezio *was* more fun.

UPDATE: I replaced my remix with @nancy-shin's re(re)mix, as it is HEAPS better. Enjoy :) Link to it is http://soundcloud.com/nancy-shin/simpsonill-only-have-ft-greebo

I walk undetected now
I blend into the crowd
No one can see

Templar! I climb up on the wall
I hear a laugh and fall
Need to get away

'Cos wherever you find me
I'm drowning in a loop
Climb a tower, save some people, run amok and find a "key"
It never seems to stop, running on the spot, never seems to...

Stopping for a cut scene
While killing off a priest
In a green zone, I'm detected, run away and find a haystack
And it's all a dream, yeah it's all a dream, nothing's as it seems

My outfit's really hot
I climb and squat a lot
Honestly you'd think I'd be more obvious

Then I wake from this dream
And find my skills are gone
It really bugs me
I can't kill or jump or climb now

Then I look up at the walls
Graffiti marks and scrawls
Someone took some weed or LSD

Nothing's True
Everything's Permitted
Except for swimming, that can wait till I'm Italian

Weird shapes, painted up high
It's hard but I try
All I get's some bullshit conspiracy

Dying, it's too easy done
No risk means no fun
So I pick a fight I know I cannot win

I pray and no one sees me
Though I hold a sword
Pick a pocket, kill discretely, when I'm hurt a potion heals me
Starting to get bored, now I'm getting bored, now I'm getting...

What is my next mission? Exactly as my last
It's hard to get myself too worked up, when I've done this same damn shortcut
20,000 times, 20,000 times

Plot twist, comes in at the end
It turns out I've no friends
Who'd thought assassin's aren't all that endearing

Big Boss, has got a shiny ball
He teleports I fall
I love a challenge
But wait, no, he's dead, no really

20 hours and I'm done I took a week off work for this but
Now I've got 6 days to go, I'll need that time to reminisce
Feathers, flags and gold remain but can't be bothered there's no gain
I'd rather make an army strong but have to wait till version 2.1

And then I'll get the gun
And then I'll get the girl
And chutes and planes
I'll loot some dudes and swim and stun
I guess I'm saying...

Ezio's more fun

Ezio's more fun (vocal remix of Only Have by Simpsonill)

Part of the Vocal Ghosts project, to create an album of vocal songs from the NIN Ghosts instrumentals :) Lyrics below.

I loved the sweet sound of this track with the deep booming below it and the more violent sounding bits in the middle. 

It reminded me of the many conversations I've had with friends (male and female) who have been in violent relationships, and how they take so much of the responsibility on themselves. It is a heartbreaking conversation to have with a friend or indeed anyone.

So this is for all my friends who have been in or remain in violent relationships. No one deserves it.

Lyrics:

I hit my face again
My body bled again 
I feel so clumsy, lucky you love me

I broke my rib again
I hit the stairs again
My neck is black, your finger marks are deep

Now you love me people ask me
All the strangest questions
Like whether I have somewhere else to go

But like I'd leave, I'd have nobody
And anyway you'd kill me
I try explain your love just leaves a mark

I chipped a  tooth again
Vomited blood again
I hide these bruises I don't want a fuss

I broke my arm again
I split my lip again
The baby cried, I know that I'm at fault

Now you love me people ask me
All the strangest questions
Like whether I have somewhere else to go

But like I'd leave, I'd have nobody
And anyway you'd kill me
I try explain your love just leaves a mark

I hit my face again
I broke my ribs again
I chipped a tooth again
I broke a rib again

And no one understands
That no one else would want me anyway.

Lucky (Vocal Remix of Ghosts 15)

A vocal remix of another awesome song http://soundcloud.com/nancy-shin/simpsonill-help-me-im-in-hell Thanks for letting me play with this one too, it's been fun!

UPDATE: @nancy-shin did a further remix with my vocals which sounded better, so I added that here instead :) Find it also at http://soundcloud.com/nancy-shin/simpsonill-purgatory-ft-greebo

Lyrics:

Fighting with your shadow, it's a battle, I admit it's hard
I struggle, to remember, to consider, that I'm strong
I'm learning from the lessons, from the challenge, that you gave to me
I'm better, and I'm stronger, and I'm happier alone

And then you try to play me, and then you try to win
Your bullets and your armour are the words you spin
And then you try to slay my memories of your sins
You've really lost your way now

In purgatory
The past and present plague you
And you can't see the present 
But you need to see
That it takes two to tango, 
and I am done with dancing.

Just leave me be.

Purgatory (vocal remix of Hell by Simpsonill)

A mashup played on the guitar and sung by yours truly. Enjoy :)

Original vocal melody designed by the wonderful Alice BK! Look forward to playing with you again soon :)

Help I'm Unforgiven [acoustic mashup]

Remix of beautiful instrumental http://soundcloud.com/nicoahh/si-regresas. Thanks for sharing @nicoahh! :)

Lyrics:

I want to touch your soul
I need to feel your sin
I'm struck by the way you've tunneled
deep under my skin. I need to 

breathe,
I want to die
To feel so incomplete it makes a mockery of everything 

I try to be alone
but I miss that sense of home.

Now
I take apart
My sense of self

I live
to find the truth
in someone else

I clear my eyes and I clear my mind
I shake you from the branches of my soul

I see now
you held a gun
and left a hole

I do not need your soul
I cast away this need
I'm struck by the way I nearly lost myself

I know my fate
is in my hands
So why did I bind myself, I need to understand

That loneliness is hard to push away
But it's better than the mess that it creates

I'm learning how to float
To see what comes my way
I do not need your soul
I do not need your pain

Float [vocal remix of Si regresas by  A.I.T.D feat Pia]

After going to a Billy Bragg gig I came home and wrote, recorded and remixed this little tune about how no one is blameless for the issues in the world. Hope you like :)

Lyrics:

You know it's coming
You know it's true
You felt safe watching all of us 
Now we're all watching you

And now you're screaming
That you need control
Assume you own what's in our heads
But we Occupy our own

And now you're blameless
In this disease
You followed what they told you to
You didn't even dream
That all your time spent in certainty
It took you down a rabbit hole
You're just another cog...

You feed a hunger
That basic need
You fill us up with empty trash
Until our eardrums bleed

And now we're screaming
At the TV
Reality has lost its way
But some of us believe

That you're not blameless
In this disease
You followed what they told you to
You didn't even dream
That all your time spent in certainty
It took you closer down a rabbit hole
In this machine
You're just another cog in the machine

And now we're coming
We're here for you
Our revolution's rising up 
But now you have to choose
Will you die screaming as you fight the truth
It's not enough to be awake
You need to light  the fuse

Or you'll be shameless 
With this disease
Don't follow what they tell you to
You need your eyes to see
That we all live in uncertainty
And we can fill these rabbit holes
Don't want to be a cog in this machine

No one here is blameless
No one here is blameless
We all play a part in this machine

You're Blameless in this Disease [original - acoustic]

One for all my friends around the world who are makers and geeks trying to make a better world. We all now have to fight for the freedom to create.

When you dream of things you can create
You are filled with a joy and will to make
But when they try to take it all away
You draw your weary sword and join the fray

You're fighting a war
And no one can see
You try to hold a light to all the darkness and deceit

You're fighting a war
Dead on your feet
Your necessary armour makes it harder just to breathe
You're fighting a war

Now you're stuck in battle with your fate
All around you are the ghosts of souls you take
You close your eyes and dream of better days
All you wanted was to tinker and to play

Chorus

You resign yourself to battle
Then you take the ground you know that you must take
Though it crushes deep inside you
You cannot break

Blood burns, and fear spurs,
Your weapons are a measure of your fate
You have to fight for the freedom to create

Chorus

You're fighting a war [acoustic raw original]

Accidentally deleted this track, so uploading again :) As always, it is a pleasure to work with the excellent tunes of @mideion and I recommend people check out his stuff!

Got a hole inside, and it fills me up, 
like an empty safe, though the walls are strong, 
nothing can escape, and I notice now, 
all the things I want, and I push away. 
Focus on the now, but it feels so far away.

As my stomach turns, lonely in its cell, 
and I feel a loss, though nothing is gone, 
waiting here is hell, who knows what will come, 
what the loom will weave, 
there's a vacuum in a chasm but I have to let it breathe.

It happens or it doesn't. It's worth it just to see. So happy in that moment, inside your sanctuary.

Now I draw a line, push away the fear, 
and I take control, get on with the things, 
get my self in gear, and I shoot some goals, 
push myself to push along a litany of action as I start to feel I'm near.

...to the life I seek, what have I become, all the things I do, coming to a head, and I start to run. I can do it all, I don't need permission but I really wish to share with you and see what we become.

I feel you like a hunger, Consumes entirely. You fill my bones with mettle, inside our sanctuary.

It's hard to find somebody, who makes me feel complete. I'll wait to know your answer, inside my sanctuary.

Left Behind [remix of instrumental by Mideion]

I wrote this song as a request from one of the most wonderful people I have ever met. A girl is very happy to have met a man :)

(Please note to those of you playing along at home, this is just a demo, I'll record it better when I have some time.)

Lyrics:

The old man and the sea
He's sitting quite alone now
And smiling to himself
His mind is calm and free
He's on a new adventure
Untroubled by the storm
The old man and the sea

When he throws a line, both the ends are hooked
That moment of connection such a prize
To gently lure a precious life and lift her from the fray
When he lets her go she's not the same

He travels to the river, a fortress in the stream
He lets it all wash by like some old meme
Out here he can simply be, connect with what's inside
And when he's home the ocean's in his eyes

The old man and the sea
He's sitting quite alone now
And smiling to himself
His mind is calm and free
He's on a new adventure
Untroubled by the storm
The old man and the sea

He casts a lonely line, he wants to find himself
He's finally learnt he  doesn't need to live for someone else
He casts away perceptions, no longer lives a lie
And now has found acceptance for the catches in his life

He searches high and low, he cannot fill a need
He finally lets go and then is swallowed by the sea
He asks himself the question, "just what is it I seek?"
And swims back to the surface just to feel the summer heat.


The old man and the sea
He's sitting quite alone now
And smiling to himself
His mind is calm and free
He's on a new adventure
Untroubled by the storm
The old man and the sea

The old man and the sea
What's behind his eyes you cannot tell
The old man and the sea
When she sleeps she dreams of no one else

The old man and the sea
He's not in this for glory, leaves that to someone else
Cos what he wants is real
He's looking for adventures
He's searching for connection
The old man and his sea

The old man and the sea

Musician, martial artist, geek and newcomer to the world of motorbikes. Welcome to my creative headspace :)

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