This is the first full song I've completed in over 2 years. This one is an emergency pressure release valve for years of culminating crazy. Recorded on my Zoom in my living room (hey, that could be the start of my next one ...)

The Needle And The Thread

"Tick, tock," whispers a clock
On a mantelpiece beside
A dusty photograph:
Someone he used to love

Broke and beaten
His heart was torn asunder
By beauty and loneliness
Beauty and loneliness

Was it him or was it them
Pushing away?
Was it him or was it her
Wishing she could stay?

"Tick, tock," whispers a clock
On a mantelpiece beside
A dusty photograph:
Someone he used to love.

Beauty and Loneliness

Two drops from the great grey sky
Falling on me but who am I?
One spot in a swelling tide
Growing, flowing, multiplied

The river in the sky connects us all
Broken dreams and broken walls
The river in the sky connects us all
Broken fingers and broken jaws
The river in the sky connects us all
Broken vows and broken dolls
The river in the sky connects us all
Broken fingers and broken jaws

Cut me up and look inside
A thousand stories all putrified
Rotting fruit all left to waste
Hide my pride in perfume and lace

The river in the sky connects us all
Broken dreams and broken walls
The river in the sky connects us all
Broken fingers and broken jaws
The river in the sky connects us all
Broken vows and broken dolls
The river in the sky connects us all
Broken fingers and broken jaws

I’m tired
I’m so tired
I’m tired
Of streets where I can’t walk
I’m tired
I’m so so fucking tired
I’m tired
Of barbed wire fences when I talk
Of barbed wire fences when I talk

The river in the sky connects us all
Broken dreams and broken walls
The river in the sky connects us all
Broken fingers and broken jaws
The river in the sky connects us all
Broken vows and broken dolls
The river in the sky connects us all
Broken fingers and broken jaws

Broken Jaws

I wrote this song in the Spring of 2009 after 6 months of a debilitating knee injury.

Mr Sunny Day,
Why do you torment me
With your blue skies and bird song
And blossom a-plenty?

Can't you see I'm stuck indoors again?
Can't you see how much it pains me
That I'm here and you're there
So please, please, please
Leave me in peace, peace, peace

Mr Sunny Day,
You know I really would prefer to be
Lying in the cool grass
Under the great, big, open sky

But can't you see I'm stuck indoors again?
Can't you see how much it pains me
That I'm here and you're there?
So please, please, please,
Leave me in peace, peace, peace.

What I'd give
To play some frisbee in the park
And paddle by the shore.
What I'd give
For a five-mile hike in the woods
Or to row out on the Bay.

Can't you see I'm stuck indoors again?
Can't you see how much it pains me
That I'm here and you're there?
So please, please, please,
Leave me in peace, peace, peace.

Mr Sunny Day,
You know, if you're going to insist on shining so brightly
You could at least point yourself in my window -
Don't be so far away!

Can't you see I'm stuck in doors again?
Can't you see how much it pains me
That I'm here and you're all the way over there?
So please, please, please,
Leave me in peace, peace, peace, oh
Please, please, please,
Leave me in peace, peace, peace,
Please, please, please,
Leave me in peace.

Lament of the Disabled

100% fact! A Christmas present for a dear friend, written December 2010.

Never was there 
A more fearsome sound
Than the clip, clip, clip of her peg leg
On the cold ground:
Clip, clip.
Clip, clip, clip.

A motley crew of scoundrels follows her
Wherever she goes,
And she switches a patch from eye to eye
Just to keep 'em on their toes.

She's seen more continents than a map!
How about that!
And you certainly don't want to give her any crap,
No, she won't like that.
You can't imagine the stories that are told about ...

Ce-ce-ce-ce-ce-ce-celia of the seven seas
Ce-ce-ce-ce-ce-ce-celia of the seven seas
Celia is a pirate, the most fearsome you've ever seen, oh!
Ce-ce-ce-ce-ce-ce-celia of the seven seas

Celia caught a rumor
Of a hefty haul of loot
On a far and treacherous island
North of Northern Nunavut.
Nunavut.
Nunavut.

In a cave whose entrance is guarded
By a savage man-eating boar
They say a monster with a temper
Protects its gleaming hoard.

She's seen more continents than a map!
How about that!
You certainly don't want to give her any crap,
No, she won't like that.
You can't imagine the stories that are told about ...

Ce-ce-ce-ce-ce-ce-celia of the seven seas
Ce-ce-ce-ce-ce-ce-celia of the seven seas
Celia is a pirate, the most fearsome you've ever seen, oh!
Ce-ce-ce-ce-ce-ce-celia of the seven seas

When she got to the cave
The savage boar was quite alarming
But Celia pacified him, no problem!
With a large piece of salami.

And through those corridors
Tangled like a maze
Celia walked in darkness
For what may have been days
And looming at the end
With its tentacles wielded high:
A ginormous cephalopod
With one ginormous eye!

There gleamed there countless treasures
But the monster was so awesome
That they ran off and had adventures
And the loot was plum forgotten.
Plum forgotten.
What was that thing I meant to do?

Henceforth side-by-side
Voyage monster and marauder,
Terrorizing the British Navy,
Wreaking havoc and disorder.

She's seen more continents than a map!
How about that!
You certainly don't want to give her any crap,
No, she won't like that.
You can't imagine the stories that are told about ...

Ce-ce-ce-ce-ce-ce-celia of the seven seas
Ce-ce-ce-ce-ce-ce-celia of the seven seas
Celia is a pirate, the most fearsome you've ever seen, oh!
Ce-ce-ce-ce-ce-ce-celia of the seven seas

Celia is a Pirate

Written with Dr. Padmini Ray Murray as part of a creativity exercise. A guide to song-writing suggested, "Why not write about a newspaper story?!" and this was the headline ...

I am a walrus and I play the saxophone
It's not very fun, though, 'cause I'm always on my own
I left all my friends there deep under the sea
They don't understand what it's like to be me.

On the New York streets I sit and I busk
They sometimes give me pennies - I think they like my tusks
There aren't many walruses who become musicians
Hindered by discontinuous circumpolar distribution

But I've had enough of this wandering life
Looking the way I do often causes strife
Gang wars! Knife crime! The occasional skirmish
I would much rather be chilling with the fish

I took the next boat out to the Laptev Sea
Hoping for reunion with my pinniped family
But when I got there, there was no-one to be found
The cracking of the ice was the only sound

What has happened to my walrus kin?
Global warming made the ice too thin
Now I am truly on my own
With nothing to console me but my saxophone

SAXOPHONE SOLO

I am a walrus and I play the saxophone

I Am A Walrus And I Play The Saxophone

A song about the inevitability and necessity of protest. To oppress and expect no backlash is like expecting thunder without a storm. 

Through the driving rain
In the dark they came
With a bill in their hand
To silence every man
Oh

The march of black boots
In standard issue suits
To serve and protect
A social disconnect
Oh

As the water flows
A rumble grows:
A storm is brewing

Though the rain beats hard upon the ground
The roars of angry tempests resound
For though our wills grow tired and torn
No thunder without a storm

In the name of retribution
They degrade the constitution
For some petty god above
To govern who and how we love
Oh

This commercial occupation
Of an idealistic nation
And the audit of my sex
I am driven to protest
Oh

Though the water flows
A rumble grows
A storm is brewing

Though the rain beats hard upon the ground
The roars of angry tempests resound
For though our wills grow tired and torn
No thunder without a storm

Though the thunder may roll, they will never take us all
Though the thunder may roll, they will never take us all
Though the thunder may roll, they will never take us all
Though the thunder may roll, they will never take us all
Though the thunder may roll, they will never take us all
Though the thunder may roll, they will never take us all


Thunder

A song about going so far into clever that you come out stupid. Song #30957057 in the "Reasons to Never Get Involved With a Songwriter" series. May 2012.

You said you want to keep it simple
That's just the way I like it
It'll be so easy

Why do people always make things
So very complicated
It could be so easy

Why put yourself through all that inevitable pain?
I mean, really, what do you have to gain?

You're not in my brain, I don't dream about you
Well, not every day, anyway
You're not in my mind, I don't think about you
Well, not all the time
I don't care about you
I don't care about you

I'm not foolish enough for the fallacy
Of the idea of you and me
I'm much too smart to indulge in romance

If I had to define the way I feel for you
It'd be a big, wide, open, translucent blue
Free from all those silly, cloudy games

So when I'm kissing someone else you're just a missing book on my shelf
I'm much too smart to grow attached

You're not in my brain, I don't dream about you
Well, not every day, anyway
You're not in my mind, I don't think about you
Well, not all the time
I don't care about you
I don't care about you
About you

And when it's over, it just ends
Sure as the waves rushing in
To fill he holes where your feet once were
And when you're gone, it barely hurts

You're not in my brain, I don't dream about you
Well, not every day, anyway
You're not in my mind, I don't think about you
Well, not all the time
I don't care about you
I don't care about you
About you

About You

I wrote this song when I was about 16 (1999ish). It was a particularly beautiful night.

The sun is setting
Settling underneath the covers of its cool sea bed
And two moons glisten on its surface
And phosphorescence dances with the stars

Woahwoahohhhooooohwoahohwoahohhh etc.

A thick, black fog covers everything
"Night sprinkles slumbers over the darkened earth"*
The moon dims out the light
Tiny glow-worms chirp and chatter all night

Woahwoahohhhooooohwoahohwoahohhh etc.

I cannot sleep tonight
No, I'm not even gonna try
No, I cannot sleep tonight
I'm not even gonna try.
I cannot sleep tonight
No, I'm not even gonna try
No, I cannot sleep tonight
I'm not even gonna try.

Woahwoahohhhooooohwoahohwoahohhh etc.


* From Ovid's Metamorphoses

Sleep Tonight

Oh boy, this is a rough one. I wrote this in a time of stress-induced sickness that left me mostly unable to sing, which is why my voice is so weak. Also, out of tune ukulele!

Hannah Werdmuller - I Need A Break

Based in Sebastopol CA, Hannah is the frontwoman of indie-folk band Django Moves to Portland, and singer/ukulelemeister in Chonk!

Hannah Werdmuller

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