Act One, scene three: Scene noob Kevin wanders into the seedy belly of distros and merch table attending his first hardcore show.
----
D'ya wanna buy a zine?
It's a punk-rock publication.
D'ya wanna buy a zine?
It's a DIY sensation.
D'ya know what that means?

(No Answers and Clamor, Dear Jesus, Punk Planet, Doris and Slant, Suburban Voice and Eggplant, Ben is Dead, Ulysses Speaks, Bullshit and Schism, Greedy Bastard, Intermission....)

D'ya want some demo tapes?
I'm sure most of them are great.
D'ya need a dialer or some VHS cassettes?
I can getcha whatcha need
I've got Chain of Strength on green
So, tell me, dy'a wanna buy a zine?

I can get you anything.

So, D'ya Wanna Buy a Zine

Act One, scene 7: Already growing in popularity, Kevin closes act one with a bold ambition--to be the first hardcore kid to bring Fugazi to play a show in Pigsnuckle, New Jersey! ... But will this kind of status go to his head?
-------

See, I'm a scenester
My name goes round the shows
When you see something fly off-stage, you know it's me who's dove.

Now the shows I put on are all-ages
They say there isn't a show I can't do.
And though I don't ride in a limo,
I've got all the rare demos
Of the bands you wish you knew.

But I guess there's one show I ain't yet put on 
that would really really take the cake...

What if tried?
What if I got Fugazi?
What if I fliered and the whole scene came?
What if I dared? What have I got to worry?
It's a $5 show: I think I'll book Fugazi.

This could be the biggest show
You'll remember how they came.
Some day they'll all know my name.



Someday They'll All Know My Name

(Young Kevin attempts to enter his first hardcore show, learning a bit about the power of promotion...)

Take a flier, come and see a show
No matter who is playin' don't ya think that you should go?
Endpoint, Lifetime, any band at all,
Show a li'ul kindness when they're tourin' far from 'ome
Bring a friend, and don't ya come alone!

(Apologies to Andrew XweberX)

Take A Flier

Act II, scene 1: Looks like Kevin's moving up in the scene ... but at what cost to HIS SOUL?
----
Kevin:
My scene cred is huge, I love how it grows
Like Pinnochio or maybe Porcell's nose.
Cool friends and status are coming my way,
I started with nothing, now I'm hip (hip hooray!)
Stickers from Dischord, mailorder from Rev?
I like to think I'm still the same old Kev'.

Kristy:
But what if you've changed,
Kevin I feel you've forgot me.
So what if they play and the whole scene came,
If that means you've changed?

Kevin:
Right, go rent the fire hall
There's so much to do!
It's not every week Chairman Ian comes through!
I want the best sound guy, and all the best mics,
a guest list with only the people I like!
Move over, Jon Hiltz, I'll have the show of the year,
and you'll all remember who brought Ian here!

No, no, I haven't time for your band.
Just a smile, a nod, and a stamp for your hand.
Oh, Mr Cometbus! Justine! Razzle! My friends!
When I say "Go jump," Ray Cappo asks, "How high?"
Kristy:
Well, I guess that you've changed
Now that you've booked Fugazi.
Now that you've dared, everyone knows your name.
But here I remain, because you always got me.
But you're after fame.
This scene is just lame.
Kevin:
They'll all know my name.

Kristy:
But I remember your name.

When They All Know Your Name

(After attending a Rorschach, Born Against show, upstart scenester Kevin confronts an old hardcore legend about the cult of personality.....)

Hey Cappo, I've got some questions for you.
How is it that you were the king of the youth crew?
Look at you today, dressed for a toga party.
And all the bands of your former friends have turned emo and art-tay.
"Coded messages and slowed down songs?"
Well, I'm all for groups maturing but don't you think that something's wrong?

Forget the unity, I'm asking where is our nation,
When former hardcore idols peddle full indoctrination.
Hey hey, Ray Ray, explain it to me.

(Srimate, bhaktivedanta...)

I loved Inside Out's "By a Thread," but I think you've lost the thread entirely, mate.

Mister Cappo I don't like what I see
That Baby Ghopal disc insulted me
I loved your earlier records, but I can't "close my eyes,"
Cuz your label's distribution only helped the shit to rise.

Can't close my eyes, close my eyes and forget all about it all, Ray.

It's A Real Shame About Ray

Act II: scene 3
Weird Old Guy Jerry shares some perspective with the charismatic Kevin before mailing HeartattaCk his resignation letter from hardcore... But has he delivered the per-zine to Cosette as promised???!!!???
How "old" is old?
"'You saw Bold' is Old'"
Let's spend the night.

----
Summer of '93
I went up to see G.B.
But Civ and company, they didn't show.

Then Quicksand live in Bayonne,
truth be told, I dined alone.
It's a cinch to [slurs] and level the omissions.

Kiss me I'm old school, I went to see the shows when you were still a child.
I will lay me down.
I will save that old school sound.
Come along with me
Hardcore is for you and me.

Kiss me I'm old school, and say goodnight.
Kiss me I'm old school, let's spend the night.
How old is old?
"I saw Bold" is old.






Kiss Me, I'm Old School (How Old is Old?)

Beau Beau from Avail teaches us that being in a band isn't just about playing an instrument
----
Beau Beau:
Bands are kinda tricky
when you've no instrument to play.
So if you wanna make it big,
listen close to what I say.

Learn a lesson from the Bosstones
Just be yourself, like Bez.

Find some folks you love,
and supersoak their fans.
That's how I joined a hardcore band.

The Secret Of My Success (Beau Beau's Theme)

Scene noob Kevin goes to his first HC show and learns the scene is made up of many different cliques and regional personalities.
He narrowly avoids an Alleyway-style beatdown (and imminent litigation from whoever handles licensing for Gilbert & Sullivan compositions in 2014)
---
Camera-Wielding Stage Potatoes:
Three cameras upfront, photographing
Flashes popping, shutters snapping
Of the singalongs and mic grabbin.g
White-Belts:
We San Diego kids aren't bogus
Spock haircuts and wing-tip toeses
Aping Ian Sven-ee-o-nus

Jocks in Basketball Jerseys:
Hardliners live in Salt Lake City
Hating cheese and Loving kitties
Starting fights just cuz we're shitty.

NEW YORK

From the Cro-Mags on to Rorschach, one thing must be true
There's never been a better than the New York Crew.
Sick of it All and Nausea and Reagan Youth
Are the razor in the "apple" that will cut your tooth.

Running from the wolfpack like a hunted fox,
Progressive players parting for commercial rock.
Fans searching still like suckers for what's out of stock
In the crates of your collections and your distro box.

Back On The Map

The "true til death" guitarist in Kevin's new band, XAir JordanX, has some unsettling news on the eve of their big show.
---
I won't be X'ing up tonight
I snuck a beer with my roommate.
A miller lite.
I did not get tight.
It was not a keg, it was just one can.
But we all know how that goes: the whole crew knows.

I was "out of step," now I'm just a prep.
I've got to face the fact...
Did I?.. Did I stab your back?

(Poor old edgebreak.... should not edgebreak)

Hardcore-The Musical

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