Child, existing together entwined, I know our end is nigh. 

Cant act like we've found ourselves, cant familiarise. I cannot hear I only see through old familiar eyes. 
But these lies we reciprocate blatantly cry: 'I've been having such terrible doubts but don't pry'. 
Living without a scheduled purpose is not my way of running wild. 

Child, existing together entwined, I know our end is nigh. 

Only child, with your penance and your past-self meek and mild. 
Only child, leave and go seize the day. 

I sacrificed, suppressed and saw not a trace of a smile. 
I gave you two years of my life but was it worthwhile? 

Only child. 
Oh my lonely child.

Old Familiar Eyes

I've been feeling tremors at the foundation of my being and I just cannot be seen as a man of exceptional wealth. 
A paper trail behind me - documenting the financial crisis, my numerous vices, my steadily dwindling wealth. 
Chemical debt, how low can you get, how wrong were you before...
Trauma. I've been reckless with my karma. 
Happiness on credit, movement from A to B. I take and take just for me.
Plastic is burned to an overfilling urn for a feeble lesson learned: 
You've got a beautiful mind - how I wish it were mine. 

So I stroll down to a cash point - money it keeps on rolling and I must be polling as a corrupt tactician at best. 
Dharma so black you better watch your back because you never learn...

Trauma. I've been reckless with my karma. 
Happiness on credit, movement from A to B. I take and take just for me.
Repayments made, withdraw to the glade where I'm stranded for five days. 

Oh sir, your limit has been reached - like blood from a leech.

Trauma

Focused on a phrase to enrich my days in contrition. 
What more can I do but bow down to you in submission of a power divine:
The proof is in the pulpit and the glory mine. 
To ever-loving union I'm assigned.

You know my body is a restless rack of bones. 
You'll see the beauty that awaits both you and me. 
You know if your body controls beyond all belief then one day you'll know relief.
Until then you will learn to love again - embrace him, place within your soul a reservation and you'll make it metaphysically. No pain and no agency. 

Fixated on a fact: whichever attributes I lack will be made up to me. 
I mustn't be so sore the next man born with so much more will know an avaricious livelihood but seldom sanctuary - perpetuating pleasure, profit and his misery. 
Transcending space and time's good enough for me.

You know my body is a restless rack of bones. 
You'll see the beauty that awaits both you and me. 
You know if your body controls beyond all relief all it takes is some belief. 
So don't fret just imbibe your saviour's blood and sweat. 
Don't falter, throw your knees down at the alter and scream out: 'Amen!' 

And I'll see you again.

Out Of Body

Fire and brimstone they tell me will be raining if the other wins - I'm willing to believe it. 
Mired by false hope; I'll stick to slander, truth is tantamount to spin. 
Whatever will relieve it? 

And you know a swing and a blow is known to be vacuous fervour. 
And you'd see if you listened to me: they're far from civil and they sure as hell don't serve you. 
What can I do to take this further? 

Oh my, you rule the sky but it's not enough so you start to play rough: 
Now you want the stars the sun and moon.
I don't need a fancy degree to be incensed - I just use common sense.
Could I ever ask the same of you, living with a private view. 

Oh lord, I cant stand discord but insult my pride and we'll take it outside. 
I cant be swayed or condescended to. 
Because I'm a man of a modest vocation with a love for his nation - you cant stop it going down the tubes because of a private view. 
Another private view.

Private View

What in the world is going wrong? 
There's disruption I don't think will ever belong. 
So uninspired and terminally tired and you know there's no magic wand to pressure pervy reggae into going steady. 
So my symptoms are sufficient in severity for the fast track to emotional security. 
I used to wince when I caught a glimpse of my reflection but I'd be sectioned if I say... 

Pervy reggae how do I feel I cant possibly say. 
Pervy reggae I'm not feeling myself and I'm fading away. 

Pervy reggae it's clinical, cynical, saving the day. 
Pervy reggae and I'm fading away.

Pervy Reggae

It's confounding being caught in you. 
It's astounding what'll make you blue. 
So don't confuse my words as holding malice as they break through the ailing system you rely on. 
Only with the strength of a lion will you see the wonderful things which abundantly bring some purpose anew. 

There's nothing I can do, nothing I can be when she cuts deep and puts the weight on me. 
She's my best friend, she's my idol - I cant conceive her being suicidal. 

Whilst I won't always be at your side and my condolences don't satisfy - you may mistake my mind as custom built to shoulder guilt or therapise. 
But just because I love you dearly doesn't mean I comprehend clearly every time you make it my fault or you start an assault on the girl I once knew. 

There's nothing I can do, nothing I can be when she cuts deep and puts the weight on me. 
She's my best friend, she's my idol - I cant conceive her being suicidal.

Suicidal

The time was ripe for a reunion; their fate was a bygone occurrence. 
And on that night he spoke quite sparingly and could only indulge in assurance: 
'This ground we tread - I miss it and wish we were bound by the hip here instead.'
But she was way ahead: 'I'm not lying on cue I've something to tell you...' 

'Most books don't get read - the pain that winter brings when leaves still decompose in spring,  I know - don't act so misled. If you cant discuss what has divided us I'll leave you with a life-affirming glow and sure enough you'll show your strength instead.' 

Her caustic plea came so dramatically, she was forthright and firmly convicted. 
He couldn't speak and mused in disbelief, 'How did she know every sentence was scripted?' 
Then her gaze destroyed his standing - she never was quite as alluring or half as commanding. 
And so her sudden reprimanding put his doubts to bed, what was it she said? 

'Most books don't get read - the pain that winter brings when leaves still decompose in spring,  I know - don't act so misled. If you cant discuss what has divided us I'll leave you with a life-affirming glow and sure enough you'll show your strength instead.' 

He plucked up and pled, 'Ignore what I said, the distance and the drama' - her heart bled. 
She could only stall for time to delicately draw the line: 
'Sure we both have history but that is how it's supposed to be' 
He stood there broken repeating the words that she'd spoken. 

'Most books don't get read - the pain that winter brings when leaves still decompose in spring,  I know - don't act so misled.' 
'And now she's leaving me for some new company - her form and fragrance faded from my bed. You know most books don't get read'

Most Books Don't Get Read

Old Familiar Reprise

A winding path below a hill extends beyond the Holy See and leads past God's gracious demand of a human singularity. 
Eternity's for paupers and those pious and passe - we've prepared for your stay. 

Welcome to Dr. Wright's Asylum - guests are always free. 
We'll see you when you get here and in a coffin you will leave. 
My soul died long ago and now my brain succeeds. 
Please conceal your overflowing zeal and fantasy. 

Suspend your faith for one brief moment, freely scrutinise your God whose creation and pontification are nothing but unwise. 
Submit yourself to my command, I'll deify myself. Effectively treating and otherwise cheating in matters of poor mental health. 
There's endless medication for your spiritual decline - we'll change you like water into wine. 

Welcome to Dr. Wright's Asylum - guests are always free. 
We'll see you when you get here and in a coffin you will leave. 
My soul died long ago and now my brain succeeds. 
Please conceal your overflowing zeal and fantasy. 

Read between the lines in what I do and do not say - we've prepared for your stay...

Dr Wright's Asylum

An epilogue's all well and good in theory but to punctuate a childhood is a chore.
I'd hesitate to say I saw more clearly the fruits of flying to a different shore. 
I'm not one of your own, I feel so helpless and alone so suspend your summer holiday and throw this dog a bone. 

Head in hands I hate myself. It never was a question of stability or mental but why am I broken? 
By those I should love but instead my vitriol is on the whole something I cannot put to bed. 
These condemnations have at last awoken... 

...With a simple cognitive twist. 
As easy as a flick of the wrist. 
Put your skanking shoes on honey and see the light you missed. 
I am dangerous, dark and so subdued. 
So abandoning my wanderlust I see what's overdue:
I guess that I have had enough of you.

Harry Leaf

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