I wrote this song after I read the young woman's letter she wrote in response to the boy that raped her at Stanford University.  It was a hard letter to read. I'm a father of two girls myself. 

You Didn't Even Know My Name

Woke up startled lying in a gurney bed
Nurse is looking at my head
Can't believe what she said

Signed the paper and they ran all their tests
I'm sure they all tried their best
But I just couldn't rest

To my friends and family I try to hide the shame
Lawyers told me I was the one to blame
Win or lose its all the same
You didn't even know my name

They all asked me if I made it home safe
And though I tried to fade away
So much I had to say

I've lost count of all the sleepless nights
What made you think you had the right
I couldn't even put up a fight

Go find a corner where you can hide
Everything that you denied
Oh just to save your pride

Even though right now I don't feel fine
I know a new strength I will find
You don't get to take the rest of mine


You Didnt Even Know My Name

She only calls me when she cries
When someone else has broke her heart
She only calls me late at night
She only calls me when she cries

She only holds me with her eyes
When her arms are reaching out for him
As if to pray I'll be alright
She only holds me with her eyes

Like a fool I jump on in
Say, "This time it's different," again
And I melt to that pretty voice
I'm not strong enough to make a choice
I'm losing to her every win

She only loves me when she lies
When the one she wants is out of town
And lonely's got her on the line
She only loves me when she lies

*Pedal Steel - Eric Domkowski

She - Only - Loves - Me - When - She - Lies

Days are rolling by like they're on a freight train
I can't ever seem to make them stay
Moving too fast and won't slow down
Another year goes by and I'm still in this town

I've watched my I do's fade into please just go
I don't love you no more so hit the road
I've seen my children grow up way too fast
I hold them for a moment but it just don't last

Don't it seem like this life is just a shakedown
Don't it feel like they're getting what they want
Don't you wish sometimes that you could break down
Instead of giving it all you got

All my dreams scattered in the wind
All my good deeds are lost in sin
All my hopes have turned to dust
All my love is full of rust

Shakedown

I'm a dreamer, I'm a loser
I never had a chance in this world

Learned my lesson
Gave the best that I ever would be to a runaway girl

I guess sometimes that's just how things go
Not everyone is meant to be showered in gold
You keep being you and do what you do
Leave me to be me

I've had my chances, picked the wrong dances
Ended up alone at the end of it all

Watch the sun fade, turn up the night shade
Don't know if I can rise but I know I can fall

Me To Be Me

Headed for a shot
Sittin at a bar
Looking down the road 
Not getting very far

Called all your friends
To try and make amends
Headed for the night
Hope it never ends

Wondering what you’ve done
Wondering where you'll go
Wondering who you are
And if you'll ever know

Everything's the same
Just different ways to see
Nothing's gonna change
between you and me

Oh there's no time to set things straight
You found out just a bit to late
Now you’re left there feeling blue

Wanting just to leave
But never get the chance
Always 17
Alone at the dance

One day has come
Another one has gone
The miles between
Are getting pretty long

The wind is full of holes
That blow right through your bones
Giving you a chill
Feeling so alone

There's no way to let go
There's no way to fly
There's no way to hold
What's left with you and I

Oh there's no time to set things straight
You found out just a bit to late
Now you’re left there feeling blue

Walking down the road
Looking at the stars
Remembering the pain
And feeling all the scars

Losing all your dreams
They fall right through your hand
Never get them back
Never make a stand

So you try to run
Push it to the edge
It's never very fun
Facing all the dread

You're giving it your best
It's never good enough
Wanting just to rest
And find someone to love

Feeling Blue

Well I woke up and went looking for my shoes
I've been down to the crossroads to pay my dues
I've been a dollar short with the rent past due
But I never wrote a song about the blues

My ex old lady ran off with my ex best friend
She says she's sorry but she don't wanna see me again

My mama never knew my daddy's name
But I grew up fine without him just the same
Born under a bad sign with nothing left to lose
But I never wrote a song about the blues

I sold my soul to the devil when I turned 23
Now after all this time I'm still living on my knees

I've been hungry with no food to fill me up
There's no quenching my thirst from an empty cup
I've wandered down back alley's in search of something new
But I never wrote a song about the blues

Jason Guthmiller - Lead Guitar
Co-Written with Jason Guthmiller

I Never Wrote a Song About the Blues

Man In The Mirror

On My Own

Tall Tales - Co-Written with Cody Henson Hullinger

Back in the day before the land was conquered
before we lived out lives on only what we see
Pecos Bill and Paul Bunyan would wander
Back when stories of heroes all ran free

They would roam up and down the prairie
North and South and East to West and coast to coast
Chopping trees and lassoing tornadoes
At least that's how the story goes

There ain't room for tall tales anymore
'Cause no one's got a heart that will believe
We fill our lives with more and more distraction
We've all got eyes but cannot see

And Ol' John Henry he would hammer and you could hear that clamour
from miles and miles away
The steam machine finally came in second
When John showed up that day

But progress came and towns they turned to cities 
and everyone got busy oh how things did change
What was preached faded into whisper
No more riding twisters on the range

Nowadays, we don't use imagination
Or ever let a story take us back
There's no time for the Blue Ox 
or the man who swung an axe

Tall Tales

50 on a Tuesday
100 on a Wednesday
You just count it lucky that you got paid

Taking requests now
I'm not sure I know how
To play the songs you want me to play

But sometimes on the weekend
The crowd is just right
You can make a Friday turn into Saturday night
You keep on believing
You keep dreaming
That someday everything is gonna turn out right

I got a guitar
I'll play it at your bar
For drinks and food and money to get down the road

If they don't like me
Just tell them that I'll be
Gone before they will even know

Heath Johnson

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