“Put’em up Son!”       Bert’s Story

‘Herbert George Fry’ was the Second youngest of six born to Frederick & Caroline in London's ‘down-at-heel’ East End, 1905   His early years were tough!  When Bert was Six, his Dad (a ‘Hansom cab’ driver)  had a fall and tragically lost his sight!  This left Caroline to take in laundry to try to make ends meet!  Bert would scour the markets for discarded veg and meat finding any scrap of Interest for the pot.   He earned some pennies with odd jobs like lighting fires for the Jewish families on Sabbath.  He also cleaned out the ovens at the Whitechapel Bell Foundry!  The kids were sent in before the furnace cooled which made the turnaround quicker for the boss!  Blisters, callouses, choking & other health issues were common.  It was regular work though & Bert was a grafter!  Carrie (Bert’s oldest sister) adopted the role of Mum.  She did her best to make up for the absence of her own Mum as primary carer.  Bert never forgot this & His admiration for his Sister was life long!  By the time Bert got to the tender age of Thirteen the Great War had already cast a long shadow.  When Ferdinand Von Zeppelin’s mighty airships threatened bombs from the clouds,  Bert would get on his bike & blow a bugle to warn people to take cover!  He was keen to go to sea and do his bit for the war effort.  Bert pitched up at Navy Recruitment and lied about his Age!  The Officer took one look at Him and 
Suggested that he came back when He Had some 
‘Shit in His Shoes!’ 
Undeterred, Bert pitched up again less than a year later. 
aged just Fourteen,  He pulled his toughest face and showed his straightest Back! 
“You’re in The Navy Now Son!”  
Bert served Ten years, rising to the rank of Leading Seaman and Acting Petty Officer.  He earned extra as a ship’s photographer and was also a gifted ‘light welterweight’ boxer.  He did well from these ventures and every spare penny was sent home to keep Mum and the family.   In 1929 (Aged 24) he joined the Metropolitan Police but his bobby’s uniform soon gave way to a smart Pin-Striped suit as Detective Constable and later, Sergeant!  Bert was twice a member of Scotland yard’s famous ‘Flying Squad ’  and earned himself the
nickname ‘Admiral ’ for his dapper turnout & History,  as well as an enviable reputation for Crime Fighting.  In 1934 Bert fell in love with the Beautiful 20 year-old Gretchen.  Two years later they married and had two children, Peter and (My Mum) Margaret.  Differences with seniors of the ‘Graduate Force’ led to Bert’s retirement from the ‘Met’ in 1958 and he Ended his working days running security for ‘Joe Lyons ’ Coffee houses. 
Bert finally sailed from this world in 1991, aged 86.

“Muck in Your Shoes” Contemplates the difference that a year could have made to young Bert & all that followed in his extraordinary life.  I have used His 1888 ’Domenico Maratea’ (bowl back) Mandolin & Ukulele Banjo on this recording to add his Indelible mark to the project.  Instruments that I remember hearing from my own Christmases past. 

The story Continues!

Herbert Houdini (aka Dan Gmaj) 5th November 2014

Many thanks to Phil Cooper and all at the 'Artist Collective'
who inspired me to action this project 
Their Album 'Stories of the Great War' will be out soon :-) http://artistcollective.co.uk/ 
https://www.facebook.com/artistcollectivemusic/info

Lyrics:

On steed of steel the Stepney scout a warning bugle blew
To shelter run and save yourselves from hunting airship crew
A deed so brave from one so young yet no surprise to me
With straightened back to join the fight the Navy it would be!
 
Come back when there’s shit in your shoes boy
Come back when you've seen one more year
You’re keen!  That’s a credit to you boy
But save your old Mum from the tears
You’re needed to gather the veg Bert, 
The fires won’t light on their own
Your brovers and sisters will miss Bert, 
Don’t leave the family home

The Whitechapel bells all will cool Bert, 
The blisters and callouses heal
The Peelers, a good man will miss Bert 
A life's worth of time you must steal
The villains they'll all get away Bert, 
No one to keep'em on straight
The Toffs they’ll learn nuffin at all Bert, 
Coz you won’t be there as a mate!

Your Greta you never will court Bert, 
Young Maggie & Pete not a Glint ;-)
& Il'l never write this at all Bert, 
Coz I won't Exist,  that’s a hint!
Piano play never to roll Bert, 
Not a pluck from your old mandolin
My Christmases fading away Bert, 
Like tales of your travels to sing

So come back when there’s shit in your shoes boy, 
Come back when you’re not just a lad
Come back when there's shit in you shoes Bert, 
We'll sing of the life that you've had, 
We'll sing of the life that you've had :-D

Lest we forget  11/11/2014


Muck In Your Shoes (Master)

The Artwork for this album certainly grabs your attention!
I used to like a ginger nut too!  ;-) 

How often do you get a chance to work on studio stems
from a band that you love for their sheer musicality?

This is my effort for the concept album 'Same Song Different Mix.' The Blockheads had 300 entries for the 10 available places so my disappointment at not being selected was more than bearable. 
I added backing vocals and sax to the project as I simply could not resist the chance to play with these #Legends 
I loved the process of doing my thing on this track, and feel all the richer for it!  I like to think that I added in just the right places to do justice to Derek Hussey's touching lyrics.
Have a good listen and you can decide for yourselves :-D

Oi Oi Gents :-D

Album available through: http://www.theblockheads.com/

Confused - The Blockheads (Herbert Houdini Mix & Mods)

A fusion of James G Wilson's wonderful virtuoso guitar track 'Dirge' with arrangement, vocals and a little magic from Herbert Houdini to create the 'Sea Monster' that is 
'DMS Seadirge' 
DMS (Di Methyl Sulphide) is that wonderful 'Living' smell that you get from sea mist when waves crash against rocks.  The smell actually comes from the activity of lots of bacteria doing what they do best! :-D
I know! Wild isn't it!
I asked James to give me a few clues about what he was passionate about and he simply said 'Being Free'

Amen to that! 

Dan xo B-) aka Herbert Houdini

The Song is also generously reviewed via 'Fresh on the net' here by Sam Bonham (from BBC Introwest): http://freshonthenet.co.uk/2014/12/faves131/

Finally! (and very importantly!) here is a link to James G Wilson's Brilliant virtuoso piece that inspired this project:
https://soundcloud.com/jamesgwilsonmusic/dirge-1

DMS Seadirge (James G Wilson & Herbert Houdini)

On 'BBC Introducing in the West' Sam Bonham & Richard Pitt discuss www.freshonthenet.co.uk and my collaboration piece with James G Wilson 'DMS Seadirge'
Sam Bonham wrote a lovely review of the track which can be found here http://freshonthenet.co.uk/2014/12/faves131/
<3 HH <3

DMS Seadirge On BBC Introwest 13th December 2014

The original track 'Awake' is from Phil Cooper's brilliantly conceived 2014 album 'Half Live' http://philcooper.bandcamp.com/album/half-live
This album frames Phil's unique 'Live' recordings alongside remastered studio versions of the Live originals.
'Awake' really stood out for me, so naturally I asked Phil for 'permission to tweak' He said YES! :-D 
The result is 'Awake (Still!)' which represents a slight rearrangement of the original with some subtle vocal input and ideas from outside of the box of 'Herbert Houdini' 
I really hope you enjoy it as much as I did working on it :-D

I have been working with Phil and a host of other wonderful 'West Country'  musicians under the umbrella of 'The Artist Collective' and we are hoping to deliver our project called 'Stories of the Great War'  later in the year.

You can hear more from Phil in the following places too!

https://twitter.com/philcoopermusic
https://www.facebook.com/philcoopermusic
https://soundcloud.com/philcoopermusic

HH xo <3


Awake (Still!) by Phil Cooper (Herbert Houdini Mix & Mods)

'Herbert Houdini' is an aka for Westbury based musician and creator Dan Gmaj

"You can put me in a box if you like. But you'll never find me there!"

:-D  

p.s. If you find me close by please be quiet! I'm probably thinking! <3 HH xo

Herbert Houdini

Popular tracks