That Was Then
(I. Sandoval, S. James)
Produced by Sean J. Recorded and mixed at IamU Recording Studios by BR. 

Purchase here: http://itunes.apple.com/album/id1071216453?ls=1&app=itunes

See now
I’m not really sure where to start baby
Everything’s been falling apart lately
Maybe I caused it, na, know your involvement
But I love you too much to let you wear that garment
Target on your back since the day we started
That I placed there for me to hit when we departed
Sadistic I know, but I’d rather you than me
Be the one of us who becomes statistics
Said we’d never work cuz I’m never listening
And because of this we fell with a quickness
All my life I’ve been an efficient demolitionist
Tore every relationship into little pieces
That’s just the base of it, here’s the thesis
Everybody that I loved, I’ve seen em suffer
And I feel their pain with em, cuz I’m self-destructive
And so I bring anguish upon myself as if
That could help, and I don’t care for self
So I never stop and think about the repercussions
I feel the reaper coming, disturbs my slumber
I swear everything I did man, I did for loved ones
Don’t think I ever tried to sin for my own comfort
But I know that’s I lie, thanks to the pop filter
I’m like boxing, where would I be without my mic buffer
And it’s not just me, those right beside us
Who live life beside us, can see the change
Day-to-day now you acting strange
You doing everything within your power to compromise us
Divide us, drive us, it starts inside us
It either sparks the fire or it burns like silence
Now my heart’s broke, and your soul’s a black hole
But that’s the path you chose
No turning back, you know
That’s what I told you the night you turned your back to go
Sad I know, but I’m fighting through it
Swear my relationship with life has gotten so abusive
I’m adding focus to it, but I’m so confused it’s
Like a paraplegic tryna start a movement
Actions speak louder than words unless you’re me
My words speak volumes, acts tend to deceive
Facts, see it’s the grief in my heart poisoning me
Preventing reciprocation of the love that I receive
But, what if this pitfall’s not just me? I mean honestly,
 I see these same traits in a lot of emcees
I know you can’t relate, and I’d like to say
It’s your fault, but it’s not 
And the reason babe
There’s a yearning in my heart I can’t articulate
A fate I can’t escape, it’s like a massive weight
A boulder I’m holding upon my shoulders
That I know is gonna put me in the grave someday
The reason that my lady started hating me
Expressing pain eloquently seems like my curse
So I still look good when I’m at my worst
I guess that’s the perk, I stay fast at work
Construct words into verse for those who were
Up late last night contemplating life
Fighting with themselves inside the octagon
That’s why I lost my job
The reason all my hope had been escaped my sight
But knowing me I’ll write poetry
And put it out for the public to notice me
I drive myself mad, and the chauffeur’s me
In a war of attrition, there’s no hope for peace
And the hands that used to help me off the ground
Nowhere to be found whenever I fall down
It’s so profound, no one around
Cuz I always feel all alone when I’m in a crowd
Ask me why I’m stressed, cuz I’m nightly fighting
For superiority over my inferiority 
Complex, And it might seem like I’m straying off the topic
I’m tryna get off, but it’s hard to get restitution
And reach a resolution and what not
When the crime comes with a punishment that never stops
So now we’re only still together cuz we have to be
It’s apathy, ain’t given half of me, for weeks actually
And yet you still speak factually
When you casually say that nobody could come after me
It was December twenty-fifth today
Would’ve been our anniversary, two years, but you left on the fifth of may
And I told you that you’d never be coming back again
And I’m doing just fine now, baby, that was then


That Was Then

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