A Short Lullaby For Sander

It's going to be ok

Street Fighting Man - Rolling Stones Cover By I Are Toady

You Know You're Right - Nirvana Cover By I Are Toady And Lyndsie Alguire

Strawberries and Black Pepper (v.1)

Something Someday Maybe? (1)

How to make shadow puppets using a flashlight and a flaccid penis

Once
I was
Dangerous
Now 
i feel 
like a safe bet

better
loved me better as a loser
loved me better
better as a loser

Safe Bet (better As A Loser)

my first cover song.  not everything is quite the way i wanted it, but pixies music is kinda all about the beauty of imperfection.

a big big THANK YOU to http://soundcloud.com/lyndsie-alguire
for lending her voice to this track!!!  sounds great!

Hey (feat. Lyndsie Alguire) - Pixies Cover

Late in the month of January
the 26th right on the hair
we had ourselves a very merry deutsch Australia Day
I showed what a drunken ass is
couldn't find my bloody glasses
you just laughed right at me and you said "they're on your face"
I had to have you, had to impress
had to get you out that dress
so i suggested that we try a change of venue
we found a place with better grooves
so i could show you my best moves
"say, luv, d'ya like what you're seeing on the menu?"

So we hopped into the sack and you were my savior
you rushed the I love you, but i forgave you
you're the best damn thing that ever crashed into my life
And then something happened inside your tummy
and you said that you'd soon be a mummy
and i said "that's not all, you're gonna be my wife"

You acquiesced, you would be mine
but only if on Valentine's 
and only if you got to have my name
You want to be a Haggerty?
That's alright, that's fine by me
Just as long as i get to touch your butt
Then Lila came, and we did adore
enough to make two children more
and it's crazy, right, but now we're mum and pops
So let's celebrate these last ten years
by opening up ten tall beers 
and i'll make sure you get lots and lots of hops.

Cuz i'm your Blarg
You're Blarg's Lady
I make you dinner
You make me babies
I'm your Blarg 
You're Blarg's lady
i love you very very very very much
Let's do some naked stuff

It's like this, luv
I love the bollocks outta you
and you love the bollocks out of me
we're meant to be
like sleep and dreams 
and eggs and beans 
and other things that rhyme with E
Let's do some yoga tonight
I'll show you my downward dog
I'll show you failing flexibility
I'll show you weeping log
sometimes i do the laundry
and when i do the laundry i sniff your undies
lovely, lovely lady
i just sniff the clean ones, i'm not a creep
but i smell your feet when you're asleep
I think you're great 
and you smell great
and you do things greatly
and i don't know if i've told you lately
but i appreciate how great your greatness is
it's pretty darn great

A living breathing work of art
you're even cutesie when you fart
but no worries, luv, i won't tell a soul
You're a tough senorita
a hot mamacita
your so frickin' awesome goddamn rock'n'roll
How do you do it?
I don't know
how do you make me lose control?
there's no one that i want who isn't you
You smell good even when you don't
i think they call that pheromones
i wanna eat you up like a bowl of soup

Cuz i'm your Blarg
You're Blarg's Lady
I make you dinner
You make me babies
I'm your Blarg 
You're Blarg's lady
i love you very very very very much
Let's do some naked stuff

Blarg's Lady

Take It Down A Notch

Very Short Bio:
toady is a total doucheface. i saw him at the store the other day and he totally whacked me with the coldest of shoulders, all the while eyeballing my girlfriend head to toe and whispering salt n pepa lyrics.
plus, he is always going on about himself in the third person, which is tré irratationing and angrifying.
what a dick.
ok. how about a real bio, and in the first person...
my name is todd haggerty, and i can't seem to find the shift key on my keyboard. i'm from washington state, which is probably the second best state to be in (after the state of nirvana). i currently live in norway, and something (possibly the wife and daughter thing) tells me i will be here for a while.
i make music.  
i'm not a very good soundclouder, as i take a lot more than i give, and am not the best at following up and leaving comments on other people's tracks.  trust me, if i had more time then that would change.
i know my moniker sucks, but every time i come up with a name i like, i google them shits and discover that it's already been taken by some jackass and his or her terrible doof-doof music. sometimes i play with the idea of changing my name to "the ninja fireman," as those were the two professions i pictured myself pursuing as a child.
i'm a cook by profession, which is apparently what five years of uni amounts to. i do make a mean iceberg lettuce and mayonnaise salad. that was a joke. i make those too.
sometimes i get confused in the middle of the night and dig around frantically in the sheets in search of my daughter, who is sound asleep in the next room. or occasionally i will get up and take the sheets off the bed in an attempt to expose the spiders. i know they are there. other times, i will just mumble something to my wife about taking a door off its hinges.
i am afraid of the dark, and if i am home alone at bedtime i will turn on the tv in the other room for a little light and noise. also, the gypsy lady from "drag me to hell" scares me shitless, and when i am showering i often imagine that she is just on the other side of the shower curtain.
my favorite color is yellow, or blue (depending on who is asking).
i hope you like my music, as it reflects on me, and i like people who like me. maybe that isn't true in all cases, but i definitely don't like people who don't like me. i think that's a normal reaction, though.
let's see... what else.... i've recently started to pick my nose and eat it when no one is looking. our little secret. i think it is a good way for me to stay in touch with the child i once was. besides, it's just dirt and oil, which are two of the three main ingredients in greek gastronomy (the third is blind anger).
i like to flex in the bathroom mirror, and i leave the door open a crack in the hope that i will be caught. it gives me a good opportunity to practice being bashful.
I constantly make fart noises with my mouth. it doesn't serve any purpose. it doesn't even approach comedy so much as indicate my fear of silence, and the need i feel to fill any still moment with impressions of flatulence and other, sometimes senseless and wholly imagined onomatopoeia.the only thing stopping me from filling this bio with fart sounds is my lack of certainty as to how i might spell them."theeewwwp!" ""fffffrrrrrp!" my mouth gas seems always to end with a "p." i suppose such a burst of air could only be reenacted with the help of an un-voiced, bilabial plosive.... it lends the necessary pop, the perfect accent.
as of late, i've begun to speak english with a heavy russian accent: "in my country, i am cardiologist.here, i am worker in cafeteria. mother would cry if kremlin allowed."



I Are Toady

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