dm me sad songs

she had a bf

thank you for ALL the support 
mixed by @tevinwmusic
prod by @yungameba

music video: http://bit.ly/2yaRgA1


I like to think I’m well-equipped as any other average guy 
but I just can’t discover love and I don’t even set my standards high
on top of that, I’m camera shy, maybe I should opt-out of the dating pool
and be an undercover tinder samurai

cause I would rather type online than whisper in a dingy bar
and swiping left and right could be my new bushido ninja star
and I’m well-versed in virtual lovemaking ninjutsu 
on every profile pic I post, I’m posing with my shitzu
or flexing with my shirt off cause I heard that gets you hits too

Especially OkCupid, I’m like Eros or the cherubs be,
I pierce hearts of women with my cursor and my arrow keys
and disregard my Roman roots and choose a font that’s serif-free,

trust me,

 I’m a tinder bio brainiac
the way I kindle fire with matches, I’m a pyromaniac
on christian mingle, I’m a casanova,
if ya’ll don’t think so, y’all can ask Jehovah
check your inbox, he might send an answer over

I wish I had the muscles of a granite sculpture
I would log on ashleymadison and bang adulterers
I’m so lonely, I’ve considered farmers-only
just for someone’s arms to hold me
also, I’m really big on agriculture

but if I had that body of a grecian god
I would trawl on pof.com and use it as a fishing rod
and hope I don’t get catfish,
the fact is if I did, I’d probably play along cause god knows I could use the practice,

and if I’m aching for my roots, I’d visit shaadi.com
message islamic wahhabi hijabi hotties “salaam”
and sunni, shia, those are both denominations I respect
cause I just care for our connection, 

I don’t care about the sects

sometimes I uninstall my apps in reckless insurrectious rage
and then regret it while I check the craiglist missed connections page
and then I think that I should get out more and disregard my mobile cell
and get to know the local teller at my barnes and noble well
and check out what she’s reading while she’s charging up my total sale
and ask her if she likes the novel,
and once she answers, ask her if wants to grab some coffee or some ice cream waffles,
and she’d probably say that’s awesome, 

 I’d ask her when she’s off of work,

 she might answer “midnight”

 I’d tell her that sounds awful, 

what a bummer, and from somewhere
I might muster up the nerve to get her number,

 and I would ask her what her digits are
and if I play it right then I can disregard my ninja stars, 
say sayonara to katanas and my other weapons too 
and try committing by committing online dating seppuku

tinder samurai (video in description)

don't worry, the next song is a rap
happy thanksgiving 
thanks for all the support seriously
repost retweet recycle

mixed by @ibr
produced by @mt-marcy
shout out OTJ


you sent me a text at 3:07 late last night
you barely knew him, 
you only blew him,
 you had  a few drinks

as if that could  make things right

and soon you asked  about our future  
 well, my darling, here’s my  answer


I hope you burn in a house fire
I hope you get stage IV cancer 

I’d be by your bedside waiting 
 till your sweet goodbye, my friend
I’d resuscitate you just
so I could watch you die again 

I fucking hate you 
I fucking hate you

and I know what you’ll do,

you’ll say you’re sorry
through your smile
and I’ll stay angry 
for a while
and you’ll come over
and we’ll be sober


until we’re not,
and we would make out on my sofa
I'd wake up one morning sunny

with your arms around my chest,

and it’d feel so good to be with somebody

I just might forget

how's it going

you'll say sorry through your smile

Off The Jump Presents a new single by @iamsamsa

Produced by: 
@basicjo

Mixed by:
@ibr

Cover Art by:
@iamsamsa

Stay tuned on our Social Media
 
https://twitter.com/offthejumpmg

https://www.instagram.com/offthejump

and by visiting www.offthejvmp.com/

samsa - solo

Off The Jump Presents a new single by @iamsamsa

Produced by: 
@yungmai

Mixed by:
@ibr

Cover Art by:
@passive155

Stay tuned on our Social Media

twitter.com/offthejumpmg

www.instagram.com/offthejump

and by visiting www.offthejvmp.com/

samsa - driftwood

Off The Jump Presents a new single by @iamsamsa

Produced by: 
https://soundcloud.com/lostronin

Mixed by:
@ibr

Cover Art by:
@passive155

Stay tuned on our Social Media

twitter.com/offthejumpmg

www.instagram.com/offthejump

and by visiting www.offthejvmp.com/

Annotate this song on rapgenius: https://genius.com/Samsa-cuttlefish-annotated

Lyrics: 

i wish i had your colors
i wish i had your colors
and your second sheet of skin


I was the camera shutter
you were the camera flash
you dressed in camouflage
  I- I wore pajama pants


I was a manatee
you- you were a cuttlefish,
i moved in cavalcades, lumbering
you could choreograph a ballad in the muscle tissue of a subtle twitch
masquerade as something other, make your outer colors switch
i was sculpted out of slate, you grew out a floral wreath
i had dorsal flippers, you had tentacles and plural feet
and twisted past the crevices and left me by the coral reef 

bereft of thought, left abroad
always acted like you spoke the breath of God
concrete cephalopod
of course you couldn’t let me in
coagulate your casing when I touched you with my ventral fin
polaroids with exes, you had emerald skin, several tints
watched your soma shimmer when you texted him
i’ve seen all your colors fade, it’s me that you’ve lost interest in
beige or blue at home but you could toggle through a range of hues
flash an orange smile to men that you were just a stranger to
never was a creature that you couldn’t change into, 
nothing complicated for you mimic octopus, what can’t you do 
stage yourself an angelfish, change to an electric eel,
arrange yourself in halo rings, conduct a charge of sex appeal

never knew if you would give me voltage or a spark,
me, a goldfish at the surface, you would puncture through the dark
as you were coming, never knew if you were dolphin or a shark
when you pulled your disappearing act and cast me your good-byes
i would ask you why you’re leaving, you would mask it with your lies
selective memory, forget the good, remember when i fucked shit up
hold onto regrets and petty arguments with suction cups
bioluminescent, you would find me if try and hid
giant squid feelers, venom lion fish fins

when you pulled your disappearing act and cast me your good-byes
i would ask you why you’re leaving, you would mask it with your lies
practiced master of disguise, go and blast me with your dyes
inkjet smokescreen me with mascara from your eyes

i was nothing like you; i was colorless, maladroit
i saw us as lovers, not as color-coded data points
on some sort of a lab report, i tried to become you
change my patterns often and take us back to what we had before
but i could never do it, you could see through my chromatophores
control me with your colors, what’s a sea cow to a matador 


you- you were a darter fish
facelift artifice
garter snakeskin scales
shapeshift cartilage


I was the camera shutter

you were the camera flash

you dressed in camouflage

I- I wore pajama pants


I was a manatee

you- you were a cuttlefish,

i moved in cavalcades, lumbering

samsa - cuttlefish

for promo/business inquiries DM or email: tindersamurai@gmail.com

@offthejump

@atwoodotj
@ibr
@chriswrightotj
@toccimc
@hheadhaunter