peachEP

followme pls or listen

peachfullalbum

Coming down
Somebody's sober now
I never came to from that one-two
You didn't wake me, did you try to?
How do you fake us? Did I break trust?
Is this mistake just fucking dangerous?
I lost my faces, I can't hide no lie no more

And I make it hard, I know, I'm sorry
Love me at arm's length away
I'm still dragging my heart around and it's so heavy
Do you miss me?

And I watch the dust, it collects on my desk
Cinderblocks on my chest, in my bed
I can't stop the spinning in my head
I think I'll just sleep forever
I'm a fucking train-wreck at my best
Never stop complaining for my mess
Always locked in infinite regress
I can't keep waiting for never
Tried to talk to God through the weekend
Never thought to start keeping secrets
Pray they stop at my throat for keeping
I think I'll just weep forever
Lifelines lost but I hear them beeping
Still can't stop until my head's leaking
Tried to walk alone counting Z's in
But I've found there's nothing better

But I guess I'm too far out of place
To fix my old ways
I'm stuck, I'm stuck
Guess that's just kind of what you get
Guess that's kind of the place things set
I can't get no sleep
I can't sleep but now I know it
You've been dreaming about me
But I'm just drinking codeine
No one really knows me
I guess I'm kind of like

And I make it hard, I know, I'm sorry
Love me at arm's length away
I'm still dragging my heart around and it's so heavy
Do you miss me?

And I watch the dust, it collects on my desk
Cinderblocks on my chest, in my bed
I can't stop the spinning in my head
I think I'll just sleep forever
I'm a fucking train-wreck at my best
Never stop complaining for my mess
Always locked in infinite regress
I can't keep waiting for never
Tried to talk to God through the weekend
Never thought to start keeping secrets
Pray they stop at my throat for keeping
I think I'll just weep forever
Lifelines lost but I hear them beeping
Still can't stop until my head's leaking
Tried to walk alone counting Z's in
But I've found there's nothing better

I think I'm gone
Didn't go long
And I can't find this life so wrong
No more, no more
So turn your heads as I wander by
Don't tell me I made that song a lie
Don't ever look brave with me close by
Don't tell me that I don't need to cry
So forward we run on cloudy skies
Avoiding the fall thousands of times
If we missed the jump and it's your time
You're welcome by my side

track5

track5 (feat. ICVRUS)

And that look in your eyes
Smothered me in nectar
Remaining dangerous
A heartfelt lie that couldn't change shit
Did I see you
Look at me the way I do you?
Did you want to change things?
Save me?
I don't know what I want to say
But I feel each day getting louder
I don't, I know

Light fades, particle horizon stretches away
The world is vaporizing and turning grey
So I won't keep your eyes
And my peach will turn to lies and start to decay
Light fades, particle horizon stretches away
The world is vaporizing and turning grey
So I won't keep your eyes
And my peach will turn to lies and start to decay
And we'll fade

I can feel the fall, save my last breaths
No hard feelings for that last text
I know I make it hard and I lack sense
Don't wanna talk about it in the past tense
Isn't all I am just an asset
Isn't all I am a distraction
I never thought to run from the black death
It's miasmatic
Getting hard to fake it 'til I make it
Limbo had me faded through the dayshift
And I don't need complaints through all the hatred
I'm sorry I was on my regress
You said I was bored, should've told you
I could be more and I want to
Be yours but I cannot move
Lovelorn like I ought to

Light fades, particle horizon stretches away
The world is vaporizing and turning grey
So I won't keep your eyes
And my peach will turn to lies and start to decay
Light fades, particle horizon stretches away
The world is vaporizing and turning grey
So I won't keep your eyes
And my peach will turn to lies and start to decay
Light fades, particle horizon stretches away
The world is vaporizing and turning grey
So I won't keep your eyes
And my peach will turn to lies and start to decay
Light fades, particle horizon stretches away
The world is vaporizing and turning grey
So I won't keep your eyes
And my peach will turn to lies and start to decay
And we'll fade

peach

Maybe I meant it
What I said the other day, how I threw your blood away
Could I regret it? maybe I could cry
But all is well in Hell, might as well have a good time

Diamagnetic
Just remember to forget it
I'm orbiting Hell's entrance
First circle ain't shit, already been, bitch
But you can sleep in my bed with me, girl
My appetite's already whetted
Capital G embedded, and it's all mine

But all is well in Hell, might as well have a good time
But all is well in Hell, might as well have a good time

But if I'm being honest
Maybe I don't really want this, I'm just toxic
I bathe as they bleed, spent a week waist-deep
Feeling swampish
My skin's burned to a crisp
But I could give a shit
I'm so scared of what I'm thinking
Don't say it out loud, keep sinking
So don't hide it, no lie
It's been a while since I've felt light
On my eyes since I nose-dived
Into this ice-pit, so keep crying
It ain't private, I'm terrifying
Can't disguise it, I'll let you try it
Call it a license, and I'm dying
So I might as well just have a good time, then

But all is well in Hell, might as well have a good time
But all is well in Hell, might as well have a good time

So what you gotta say?
I don't think you ever hear my voice
And I been making noise
So I don't wanna stay
And all I see is hate
And I'm scared it'll hurt too much
Years of paint, still never enough
To cover up my face
So I'll just decay

redshift

Pushing the ground
I'm so distant right now
And I need some stimulation
But I feel them taking me down
And now I feel like I can't breathe
The Devil's ghosting me out
And now I feel like I can't see
So I guess that I'll just stay out
Pushing the ground
I'm so distant right now
And I need some stimulation
But I feel like I'm taking me down
And I feel like I can't breathe
The Devil's ghosting me

Now I'm a ghost of me
When you speak
You seem miles away
Your words don't feel right
No lie, I, I, I

I saw her face dissolve
And turn to smoke
Right before my eyes
It feels like vapor
Everything's slow
This world's a lie
I saw her face dissolve
Distortions grow
She told me I'm fine
It feels like vapor
Is taking over
Think I'm gonna die

Outside the cloud, can you hear me now?
I lost the ground, I lost the ground
Painted my mouth, poison pulls me down
Are we still blood-bound? weren't you here for a while?
So don't hide it, no lie
It's been a while since I've been baptized in ultraviolet
I can't feel my own mind and I don't mind it

I saw her face dissolve
And turn to smoke
Right before my eyes
It feels like vapor
Everything's slow

I vaporize, my head's fucked up
I only like my friends on drugs
They tell me lies, "myself's enough"
But I'll be fine soon when I'm drunk
I vaporize, my head's fucked up
I only like my friends on drugs
They tell me lies, "myself's enough"
But I'll be fine soon when I'm drunk
I vaporize, my head's fucked up
I only like my friends on drugs
They tell me lies, "myself's enough"
But I'll be fine soon when I'm drunk
I vaporize, my head's fucked up
I only like my friends on drugs
They tell me lies, "myself's enough"
But I'll be fine soon when I'm drunk
I vaporize, my head's fucked up
I only like my friends on drugs
They tell me lies, "myself's enough"
But I'll be fine soon when I'm drunk
I vaporize, my head's fucked up
I only like my friends on drugs
They tell me lies, "myself's enough"
But I'll be fine soon when I'm drunk
I vaporize, my head's fucked up
I only like my friends on drugs
They tell me lies, "myself's enough"
But I'll be fine soon when I'm drunk
I vaporize, my head's fucked up
I only like my friends on drugs
They tell me lies, "myself's enough"
But I'll be fine soon when I'm drunk

vapor

vapor (feat. ICVRUS)

I can see the stars and they don't seem that far
I know, I don't
Got a clue where to start but I made it this far
Who knows?
I always needed something to believe in
Maybe just to stop you from leaving
For a while there I thought this was Eden
But it's hurting now
Please come pull me out
Think I'm gonna drown
But I could be the lesser of your stresses if
I can really help it, I'm just selfish-ish
And I know there's a lessen I been blessed with
And I don't know the message but I'm spreading it
And now I keep getting tested, now I'm weathering
I need my pen so my temperature stays level
And the Earth deserves it too I guess
But my folks are spending less and less
The next will fix it if obsessed
But I see infinite regress

All I see is red in the sky, I am reaching it
Rain pouring over since I grieve on another bitch
Throwing parties on our grave, can't help but to wear a grin
Hope it fucks you over to see me if I ever win
I could never satisfy the pride that I was born with
But I know it hurts to think back of what just isn't is
I could always try and change my speech  it is devilish
Know it makes it better cuz I got some love when I sin

Felt this way since I was really young, that's just how it is
I just want to make it for my mom, going to make her rich
Countless bitches that just broke my heart, will it ever end?
Countless people I've known from the start met their early end
Why do I feel so lost?
I am older and so numb
I don't know where I'm going
I just wanna feel loved

I think my sister hates me
And honestly I blame me
We ain't been talking lately
How can I let her face me
Through the phone when we been faking?
I should be with her shaking fists
Like, "can you fuckers take me?"
Give her her brothers safety
And if they touch her, aggravate, or even look innately
Fucking kill them sedately
Kid, finish your homework while you're waiting for me
They'll be sorry, made you worry, had to blast
Been a little scared to ask
But, Momma, am I still your baby?
I don't know my brother's favorite color but his birthday's in June
I just dropped the only family that I got to choose
I always wondered if you'd be there when I shot for the moon
Now I don't know what to do, no, I don't know what to do
Most days I'm fasting, still ain't done my taxes
Back in Carlsbad we chatted about what we fear
And, I guess we found out who the first to disappear is
But if you're still willing, hope you call me when you hear this
Hope you call me when you hear this
I hope you call me when you hear this, could you call me when you hear this
Please, please
Please call me when you hear this, please just call me when you hear this

I can see the stars and they don't seem that far
I know, I don't
Got a clue where to start but I made it this far
Here goes

12/20/2020

12/20/2020 (feat. noxlumen and jakob the STAR)

a cover of that unreleased song EDEN sang in a New York subway

it made me miss all of my friends, old and new

nofuture

followingtheCRY

forlove

originally by Elise Trouw

i cried while making this and it made me significantly worse at singing.

listen to boykeeprunning (feat. Nox) on the 18th pretty please ily

makebelieve

and i opened my eyes
lost cause, can't capsize
sheets won't hug me the same way as last night
wanna be heading out to where that sun shine
45 millimeter rolling like we lost time
a shouldercheck into my life
tough love but she was on time
awake waiting for crossed-lines
i hope you'll meet me when we're offline
so stay warm 'til i can carry you
and don't let me get ahead of you
when i run, trip, and fall out of place
and try so hard to go fly away, yeah
i know i shouldn't rush for fear of falling
but i can see the light just strolling up the walls
and now i'm

dancing with the lights off
i swear my thinking brought the sun up
and i just keep on walking this line between pleasure and pride
can't help feeling this light when you look me in the eye
maybe i should sleep just to keep from freaking out
but this is so much fun to think about

wishful thinking
i might be catching feelings
and now i can't stop singing
think i'm blooming

found a soul last year in the middle of a trench
she had snow white hair and a heart made for lament
she had heard my cries and she pulled me from cement
she had saved my little life without knowing what it meant
spent lifetimes dreaming everything that she had said
couldn't find time to sleep, too busy laying in my bed
spent nights crying, wandering and wishing i was dead
but she's still the best friend that i never truly met, yeah

and God knows my heart's still bruised
but i won't get comfortable with living blue
and now i feel golden, don't know if i should
they say i fall in love too fast for my own good
so say hi, the wave's new
these grey lines that she drew
are frayed out, can't hurt you
just play now, overdue
the sun's out, feeling's new
i hope i'll see you soon
i hope i'll get to bloom

dancing with the lights off
i swear my thinking brought the sun up
and i just keep on walking this line between pleasure and pride
can't help feeling this light when you look me in the eye
maybe i should sleep just to keep from freaking out
but this is so much fun to think about

wishful thinking
i might be catching feelings
and now i can't stop singing
think i'm blooming

overthinking
i'm pretty sure i'm dreaming
and now i can't stop singing
i hope to see you

thstle

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