Listening to this while in a manic episode hits different tbh

shoutout @prod-oc for doing the bass for me <3 
thanks for listening <3 first solo song in forever 

// chorus
i don’t want to let go
but the feeling in my chest says no
and when the colors in my eyes won’t show
i hope you’ll see I’m better as bones

// verse
i don’t want to talk about it
cause every day is a blur in my head
when i look at you you’re perfect
but don’t look at me i’m worthless
and i don’t even try to hide it
you can see on it on the surface
everyone will say i’m heartless
i just wish that they could see

that it hurts for me to breathe
and it hurts for me to feel
and it hurts for me to walk on this earth everyday
and i can’t keep on pretending
keep lying
there’s no meaning
when my life comes to an end
i swear i’ll be okay

spotify

bones

compounds

standing by the bedside
baby you know you’re picture perfect
lights off moving so slow as you undress
i’ll take time but promise i’m back before the sunset
you’re gone i should’ve known that i was worthless

why is everybody spiteful
like where’d the love go?
suddenly you hate me like i meant nothing despite all…
pushing every corner like i’m not walking on tight ropes
i know the truth is that you’d never care if i fall :/

go on
hold on
seems i made it home but it all seems
so wrong
so wrong…
there’s blood all on the floor leaking down from the walls :(
i just hate that you would never call
tell me that you care but don’t try at all
okay baby posing like a doll
i’ll clean all the blood of off the walls

i don’t serenade
i spit blood out my mouth
or all the thoughts will poison me :/
i love when it builds
and feels like i’m a walking tragedy
i romanticize the pain like it’s not fucking killing me :P
swear its fucking agony

say it’s a dream
wake me up i’ve had enough
cause i feel nothing
my
emotions
have
shut
the
fuck
up.

i'm home but the walls are bleeding [prodsecre]

@tnvr555 

always got the most to say
know your words have lost all meaning
but you say them anyway
stuck in a state of disarray
burning gardens of our love
we’ll watch the flowers all decay

but hey, whatever
i just showed up for the weather
couldn’t care for your endeavor
watched u caved under the pressure
told u shit don’t last forever
come on love i know you’re clever
keep a knife cause u know better
take the kill for me whenever
take the kill for me when-

oh well, whatever
i want to see his head severed
fill his eyes up with your terror
u know they’ll always surrender
stacking bodies just for pleasure
u love him but love me better
said that i’m the one forever
the one you’ll always remember
take the kill for me whenever

and everybody swears they’ll stay
but u know nobody but your body
will lay inside your grave
aha

can’t you tell your friends are fake
baby promise you they only want their hands around your waist

oh baby promise if you took a glance
the grass is full of snakes
i keep my friends closer than enemies,
they’ll always keep me safe
don’t you walk around so cautiously
and act like you’ve got grace
oh baby i can see the toxic traits,
it’s marked all on your face

all on your face love
cover it with makeup
you chase only the famous
then wonder why they can’t trust
say you want to change but
you’ll always be the same hun
your love is so damn dangerous
killing all that you touch

always got the most to say
know your words have lost all meaning
but you say them anyway
stuck in a state of disarray
burning gardens of our love
we’ll watch the flowers all decay

BUT HEY, WHATEVER 
I JUST SHOWED UP FOR THE WEATHER 
COULDN'T CARE FOR YOUR ENDEAVOR 
WATCHED U CAVED UNDER THE PRESSURE 
TOLD U SHIT DON'T LAST FOREVER
COME ON LOVE I KNOW YOU'RE CLEVER 
KEEP A KNIFE CAUSE U KNOW BETTER
TAKE THE KILL FOR ME WHENEVER 
TAKE THE KILL FOR ME WHEN- 

OH WELL WHATEVER 
I WANT TO SEE HIS HEAD SEVERED
FILL HIS EYES UP WITH YOUR TERROR
U KNOW THEY'LL ALWAYS SURRENDER 
STACKING BODIES JUST FOR PLEASURE 
U LOVE HIM BUT LOVE ME BETTER 
SAID THAT I'M THE ONE BETTER 
SAID THAT I'M THE ONE FOREVER
THE ONE YOU'LL ALWAYS REMEMBER 
TAKE THE KILL FOR ME 

PROMISE IF YOU TOOK A GLANCE 
THE GRASS IS FULL OF SNAKES 
I KEEP MY FRIENDS CLOSER THAN ENEMIES 
THEY'LL ALWAYS KEEP ME SAFE 
DON'T YOU WALK AROUND SO CAUTIOUSLY 
AND ACT LIKE YOU'VE GOT GRACE 
OH BABY I CAN SEE THE TOXIC TRAITS 
IT'S MARKED ALL ON YOUR FACE 

ALL ON YOUR FACE LOVE 
COVER IT WITH MAKEUP 
CHASE ONLY THE FAMOUS 
THEN WONDER WHY THEY CAN'T TRUST 
SAY YOU WANT TO CHANGE BUT 
YOU'LL ALWAYS BE THE SAME HUN
YOUR LOVE IS SO DAMN DANGEROUS 
KILLING ALL THAT YOU TOUCH

WHATEVER

SPOTIFY

WHATEVER [TNVR]

@user-153698253 @yokaidreams @tnvr555

// ohmace
you could tell me i'm just another guy
you could lie and say i'm never on your mind
and i know that you miss being mine
we should do something about it tonight
without rules
everything was easy hanging out with you 
always had your back was looking out for you
everything isnt always about you
it's not about you, 
it's not about you
dont you know that i'm just fine without you
you think it's something i'm not allowed to do
everything is not always about you...

control is what you crave
you fucking lost your way
can't recognize your face
your love is such a waste

you're a waste i dont wanna make it work
i could find a million other girls who want to flirt
look me in the eyes baby tell me with a smirk
i could see right through it all ive been on high alert

// yokai dreams 
been on high alert i don't think i'm calming down soon
i cannot convince myself i'm doin fine without you
maybe there's no reason to hope
you're treating me like a joke and i cope
but for what it's worth
i tried
my best just to fix this
i died
inside
when you said "we're finished"

// i'm geist 
control is what you crave 
but baby i crave it more 
shut you in lock the door 
yet you'll say you adore me 

spit it out 
the bloods on the floor 
it's toxic love 
that's killing us both 
the secrets out 
so love they all know 
just get out now 
can't do this anymore 

and baby i can tell you 
this would never work in your dreams 
it only works when i'm feeling lonely 
baby i cant tell you right now 
we need to find a way out 
need to find a way out

your love is such a waste w/ ohmace & yokai dreams [tnvr]

it'll be okay

the temperamental feeling will pass
and then i’ll go home
i don’t take meds for any pain
i feel it in slow mo
baby don’t you dare say my name
cause i don’t know you
play cautious but i still lose the game

so i tripped
i fell
blood's on the stairwell
i stand where we kissed
and say my farewells
again
it always ends the same

what do you even want from me?
can’t you see I can’t fucking breathe?
there’s a beautiful thing about pain and suffering
it all depends on what you believe

crumbling in my skin
always lose never win
drink from the bottle until i spin and spin and fucking spin
out of control
i can feel it all in my bones
i ain’t never coming home
so just leave me the fuck alone

it always ends the same

it always ends the same w/ revengeinkyoto [tnvr]

No way you’ve run
No way you’d harvest 
All of my bones
All of the forest
Grass isn’t green 
I need to plant it
No room for seed 
Nowhere to hold it 

Im not your king 
Don’t let me breathe
Pull down my crown 
Get hold of me 
For all I’ve done 
This can’t be happening 
Reside my throne
A thousand miles away 

I don’t
I don’t really even need much
Just a little conversation and comfort and love 
You 
You don’t even care to explain
Ask for my advice I’ll leave you sitting on the pavement 
You look so basic when you walk around
Why you stringing him to get it you can get it now
Cause I don’t give a fuck if you desert me
But why you in a rush to downgrade, not learning 

Must not know how to treat someone adequate 
I’d love to see your broke self work outta this
There’s no way I’m in a rush to hear you calling
And thank god I won’t see you in the morning 
Yeah
Pissed off I make two fists
Knuckle broke in my hand but you knew this
He’s got one black eye, make it two
I’m not the type of person that you ever knew
It’s far from the end it’s not over yet
I’ve got four more bars written out for you
Little fuck face you’re a parasite 
Get down on your knees, not uncommon for you

Anxiety’s killing me
What’s left of my wrist starts to bleed
I walked through the forest 
and found someone who looks like you
These plants die around me
I’m in this hole deserted
I found myself hiding 
From anyone like you

It’s so late out here
All I can tell
Is that you’re better here 
and happier without me now
I’m such a hypocrite 
In all these songs I give
I keep complaining just to get off
And make myself worse

like you

Fall down with me
This rain will only stop when you let it
Float 
So heavy 
Crumble under every word when you let it 
I’ll breathe through gills
In cold west winds
Won’t give me chills 
Don’t know where I’ve been

Heart shaped glass box 
Out the window this don’t add up
Fall back 
This don’t matter to you
I let some words get under my 
Skin 
Don’t breathe in 
Smoking seems better, lasting
Gills, I can’t swim
This isn’t better than it was 

Fall down with me
This rain will only stop when you let it
Float 
So heavy 
Crumble under every word when you let it 

Fall down with me
This rain will only stop when you let it
Float 
So heavy 
Crumble under every word when you let it 
I’ll breathe through gills
In cold west winds
Won’t give me chills 
Don’t know where I’ve been

gills

prod. @tnvr555 & i'm geist 

let me guess
you'll bury me in the garden

you brought this on yourself klaus
remember that

i never forget betrayal, marcel
remember that

the blood is all over the covers
so wrap up my body and
say that you only meant well
if this isn’t torture enough
let the ocd kill me
cause the thoughts are driving me out

i’ve got a lot left to say
but well i’ll bite my tongue
cause i cannot speak up when you yell
feels like the pains always lasting forever
so i drink my sorrows
and sleep by myself

and i’ve learnt that poison
is hatred
the more that you have
oh the more that you’re killing yourself
and love is no cure
cause you cannot fix somebody
who doesn't want to be fixed for themselves

i’m sorry it’s my way
or the highway
and i don’t know what else
could i say
so i leave the words
left for the stage
cause i don’t know how
how else could i’d stay

when i’m bleeding you dry
and you open up my wounds
pouring your salt telling lies
and i
i don’t feel good tonight
and if i take another shot
i swear i might take my life

cause i’m no good at apologies
but i gave you my honesty
and honestly that’s all i would liked
and if i drop dead on this hill
i bet no one would be surprised

bite my tongue

bite my tongue [tnvr]

there seems to be a problem
oh don’t wait for me
heaven’s falling down
the rooms getting colder darling
don’t look out the window
it’s falling down

you’ll see death
you’ll see me try to fix everything that we had in the past
you’ll see death
you’ll see me as i hit the ground
lost my wings all again

there’s seems to be somebody else
scraping their hands against the wall
and when hope is lost you’ll find my name doesn’t spark light
no not at all..

i don’t want to fight it
let it take control
i let you down
now you don’t love me no more
and when i hit the ground
oh not a sound was heard
so please just scrape what‘s left of me
and sell the bones

heaven's falling down

and the words don't seem to make it out
guess i stitched my mouth
feelings won't die
they're too loud
and keep leaking out

but i knew it would all
come to an end
please i must leave now
but don't forget me

and when i rest my head on you
i'm captivated you're so pretty
go on rip my heart in two
anything you want my baby

oh
i hope i see you in my dreams
when i fall asleep

WHATEVER [TNVR]

I'm Geist

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Ali Ramono

future amv

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