thanks to everyone!!!!!! <3 @josuanatanaell @vampbite @plslovejai
mastered by @josuanatanaelll
prod. @w1nteres(non-profit)



lyrics:
[josua natanael]
i still remember the time that u kissed me
i just wanna be w u all the time
idk what inside
inside your mind
i just wanna put my lips on ur lips

[i'm yxno]
I still remember the things that you said
I will never let you go
Even if you wanted to
N I can hear the sounds of the people that so hate me
Just so hate me
N I dont wanna lie
I cry most times
And I lost myself in the 'gage
Wanna die within this bond
All I ever wanted is a happy life with you
But I feel so bad
I am so sad
I am such an idiot
And deserve to be dead

[vampbite]
i want to be one with
Myself
I want to be one with
But you change
I need to go
Away
You
And me

[josua natanael]
i still remember the time that u kissed me
i just wanna be w u all the time
idk what inside
inside your mind
i just wanna put my lips on ur lips

[love jai]
I still remember the day that you left me
You would grab my heart and sweep so hard, it's empty
Tryna figure out what I should do without you
I just sit and get high inside of my room
Yeah oh, I, I, I keep on missing you
Yeah, yeah
Yeah, I, I, I, I don't know what to do

kiss me (w/ josua natanael, vampbite, love jai) +w1nteres

enjoy!!! :P
prod. branwen
mixed & mastered by me idk 


lyrics:

[Chorus]
Please just look into my eyes
And tell me sweet little lies
I just don't want you to say goodbye
I break down and
I cry so much because life is not worth the try
If I don't have you inside of mine
I don't really like the way things are turning out
So I cry my soul out and hope that someone helps me out
I love you so much
But I hate the way I treat you

[Bridge]
I said I love you
You left me
It's fine
I'm not alright
But I say that it's fine
My hopes are so gone
And I act like it's fine

[Verse]
But this is all my past
I don't have to care at all anymore
I went fast it by and I wont fall again
Thanks for staying with me babe and
I know I can be a burden sometimes
But just know deep inside I always care
Even back, I always cried by looking back
Even when we were going separate paths
I would still care about you
And I could fly and leave this place
But I know suicide isn't worth the try
If I have you by my side, and that's why I fight
And you put this light in my heart
I cant thank you enough
As I shed my tears 
I look outside of the window
And think of your pretty eyes
I could end the world 
with the power you embrace to me
You give me this only fire 
In my heart that ambushes everything around me
Everything around me

[Bridge]
You give me all the energy
That I need to go through all of this
I don't wanna fall again

[Chorus]
Please just look into my eyes
And tell me sweet little lies
I just don't want you to say goodbye
I break down and
I cry so much because life is not worth the try
If I don't have you inside of mine
I don't really like the way things are turning out
So I cry my soul out and hope that someone helps me out
I love you so much
But I hate the way I treat you

[Outro]
"Just just always remember that this one person will always be there for you 
And even when you are not in your best, sad or depressed
Even when you fuck up they will never go
And that is the beauty of love
And that's the message"

virtue (prod. branwen)

Enjoy!
prod - w1nteres & forzen
cover by - https://www.pixiv.net/en/users/27764744

lyrics:

[chorus]
In this world there ain't no things other than those fucking lies
I just wanna kill myself in my dreams 
Finally could be happy
I don't wanna die 
So I wouldn't lie 
But in my dreams it would be nicer
So so nicer
I hope I am the one you wanna stay with 
I hope I am the only one who you gone stay with
Fuck everyone in this stupid world
I fight for you never lacking my protective way
Day by day

[pre-verse]
Look day by day, we do lie all the time
And that's alright

[verse]
I feel like I am Subaru and you are my Emilia
I just fell down all the hills for you
I just wanna be with you
Protecting you even if I'm worthless
I can sense depressions on the way
I just wanna lay on the ground
Leave my body all to this dread
Yeah its all in my head and I am so dead inside
But when I am around you I feel so much better 

[pre-chorus]
But I feel so bad
I feel so fucking sad
I just wanna end myself
I have this chain around my neck
I dont have a choice left
I have to go through all this pain

[chorus]
In this world there ain't no things other than those fucking lies
I just wanna kill myself in my dreams 
Finally could be happy
I don't wanna die 
So I wouldn't lie 
But in my dreams it would be nicer
So so nicer
I hope I am the one you wanna stay with 
I hope I am the only one who you gone stay with
Fuck everyone in this stupid world
I fight for you never lacking my protective way
Day by day

blue velvet (prod. w1nteres x forzen)

I AM STUCK INSIDE THIS BREACH

ǁ Hope you guys enjoy this one, and I hope y'all been doing good over the months! <3 Thanks so much to @nokerbforever for the feature! ǁ

spotify - https://spotify.link/vyKxYJmQ0yb
delta amv - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XlstanVL3sg

prod. plxce
mixed by me & NOKERB
mastered by NOKERB

lyrics
⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯
chorus (i'm yxno) 2x:
As I go right down
As I die right now
I just wanna be with
One last time, in this mind
Im not so fkn bright
Can you put me in ur reels
I dont think I am real
I am stuck inside this breach 

verse (@nokerbforever):
this is the way things go now
throw me down now my body's on the floor
and i still passed to run, no i don't hide now
so far, so far, so far
fuck me up, ain't nothing new i'm used to this
i can feel my body dropping 
now i lost all my vision
on the ground, i'm down
always fucking up, no
getting fucked up, think that i got enough
running through the dark

chorus (i'm yxno) 2x:
As I go right down
As I die right now
I just wanna be with
One last time, in this mind
Im not so fkn bright
Can you put me in ur reels
I dont think I am real
I am stuck inside this breach 

verse (i'm yxno):
Stuck inside my space
I cant think about myself
Will the enemy
Come so on itself
To end my penalty
To put this remedy
On my shelf
To end myself
So quick oh why
Does it feel so heavenly
When Im off the xtc

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

breach

Spotify 🤍

breach w/ nokerb (plxce)

Wish for a star to be somebody.

|| I hope you all have been doing well and I hope you all feel well, I am on the way on getting better and just wanted to say I appreciate every single support I get from you guys! <3 ||

Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/track/6h34rqFbime15tesh11nUi

prod. dercept x jibaorockin
Mastered by @iamsavagekitty 
cover by k1baru - https://www.instagram.com/k1baru/

lyrics:
[intro]
Is it now time to let it go?
Is it really what I have to do
I don't wanna end it all
But I don't really see a point

[chorus]
I'm breaking down
Il never be around
In the background
I won't make a sound
All these scars on my body
Wish for a star to be somebody
Always shining bright
Always in the night
Always crack a smile
Always thinking of her
On a line, I just wanna die
And the only thing I can do is to cry
If you asked me how I feel
I will lie that I feel so f*cking fine
Even though I feel so f*cking dead inside

[bridge]
Is it now time to let it go?
Is it really what I have to do
I don't wanna end it all
But I don't really see a point

[verse]
Was I actually enough
Or did I try to be too much
And I'm sorry for all this grudge
And I'm sorry, if I ever made you cry
I will take this all up on myself
And Il Make sure that nothings left
And now I make way out
Do you actually care about how I feel right now?
Now there's nothing left
Now don't tell me
That you want me back

[chorus]
I'm breaking down
Il never be around
In the background
I won't make a sound
All these scars on my body
Wish for a star to be somebody
Always shining bright
Always in the night
Always crack a smile
Always thinking of her
On a line, I just wanna die
And the only thing I can do is to cry
If you asked me how I feel
I will lie that I feel so f*cking fine
Even though I feel so f*cking dead inside

let it go

let it go (dercept x jibaorockin)

|| I hope you all enjoy this one!!! And I hope for you guys everything is going well and accordingly! :)This song will be up on all plats in the next few days! <3 ||

Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/track/3uNhvEE89xrrdI5RB5mLO4?si=049a6cce2b074a76

prod. dercept x jkei
mastered by @nokerbforever
on my yt w/ lyrics; https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wI5MFKRrr9o

lyrics:
(intro)
Once again my thoughts feel so bad
Why did you do this all to me
Whys that I feel so fucking sad
Make me fall, make me drown,
make me drop the fkn crown
I drop down on my knee
Oh theres nothing I can do,

(chorus 2x)
The only thing I can do's agree
And now you say u wanna move out to me
even though you killed me all inside
is there really such a point in life
to be kept on the side can you go ahead
and leave me out on the sight

(Verse)
And now its only me in the room
I dont know for how long ill be alive
Cus my health has been killing me
I am only 20 and I dont wanna die
But I feel like theres no escape

As I saw this light flash
I rly saw u in these pines
I'll lay down and be this trash
I see all these signs about you
Would it hurt you if I died?
Oh no wait you cannot feel
But I definitely do
And I miss you too

(bridge)
Once again my thoughts feel so bad
Why did you do this all to me
Whys that I feel so fucking sad
Make me fall, make me drown,
make me drop the fkn crown
I drop down on my knee
Oh theres nothing I can do

(chorus 2x)
The only thing I can do's agree
And now you say u wanna move out to me
even though you killed me all inside
is there really such a point in life
to be kept on the side can you go ahead
and leave me out on the sight

emotions

emotions (dercept x jkei)

NOW I DONT HAVE U FOR MYSELF

ǁ I hope you all enjoy this song of mine, it is the first one I have recorded with my new mic and I want to thank @imgeist for doing this feature for me!!<3 ǁ

spotify - https://open.spotify.com/track/2knFfVrmN6vhz8ScPMCwGO?si=6797924968614214
on my yt with lyrics - https://youtu.be/ruCMFuFsnxc

featuring the legend @imgeist
produced by beQUITE
mastered by @nokerbforever
cover by https://vk.com/k1baru

(intro)
I'm inside my dreams and I see you all the time
When I wake up I remember you're no longer mine
I can’t keep on dwelling, when stuck I'm inside a hell
And I scream to break from this wretched shell

(chorus: i'm yxno)
Now that I'm all alone
I check my phone
And I see a million texts
Left me in these depths
You’re ruining my mind
Leaving me behind
I hate this life
I don’t wanna try
But I don’t wanna die

Stab the knife right in my back
Oh love what's with that?!
Cus I feel your hatred 
And you said I need some help 
Now I’m taking prozac
Baby you were the closest
Now I don’t have you for myself
And I'm at my lowest

(verse: I'm Geist)
dont have u for myself, dont have u for myself 

i'm feeling low, feeling nauseous 
i gave u my heart and you tossed it 
and i can't take anymore losses
cause i can't keep on trying 
when you're acting so damn toxic 

love so divine 
now that i've lost it i'm losing my mind 
problems aside 
you were my fire 
for you i would die 
baby don't cry 
u were the one that was holding the knife 
i let u cut me a million times 
bled till there's nothing still saying i'm fine

saying i'm fine, saying i'm fine

(chorus: i'm yxno)
Now that I'm all alone
I check my phone
And I see a million texts
Left me in these depths
You’re ruining my mind
Leaving me behind
I hate this life
I don’t wanna try
But I dont wanna die

Stab the knife right in my back
Oh love what's with that?!
Cus I feel your hatred 
And you said I need some help 
Now I’m taking prozac
Baby you were the closest
Now I don’t have you for myself
And I'm at my lowest

all alone

Spotify

all alone w/ I'm Geist (beQUITE)

"pages of my diary" track 4/5
https://soundcloud.com/imyxno/sets/pages-of-my-diary

prod. warheart

mixed and mastered by @nokerbforever

lyrics:
(chorus)
I got anxiety, push thru all this pain
I look up at the sky, I'm in vain 
And you said it's so wayne, so wayne
Strapped down to a chair
I know you don't care
You're with your gang
And I'm making heat on my own
I don't miss you anymore 
That's a lie
I cry everytime
I think of you and I
Why, oh why, do I still try

(verse)
You dont wanna see anymore
So dont call me back
its nearly been a month
I dont really give a shit,
the way you fuck this guy
Now I don't really care about you love
I'm a devil in disguise
Kill me off right on the spot
It doesn't even matter now
I know I am someone of a lot
All this lust that you got
Can't you just get out my head
Cuz you leave me all so fucking dead
Oh I love you so much
And I hate myself so more

(bridge)
I cant love myself anymore
I left your side and I thought,
that was the right decision
I feel so bad

(chorus)
I got anxiety, push thru all this pain
I look up at the sky, I'm in vain 
And you said it's so wayne, so wayne
Strapped down to a chair
I know you don't care
You're with your gang
And I'm making heat on my own
I don't miss you anymore 
That's a lie
I cry everytime
I think of you and I
Why, oh why, do I still try

pages of my diary

I am scared of the outcome

pages of my diary ep

I am scared of the outcome (warheart)

"pages of my diary" track 3/5
https://soundcloud.com/imyxno/sets/pages-of-my-diary

prod. beQUITE

mixed by me, mastered by @nokerbforever

lyrics:
I make myself so nervous every time
And they tell me do the right thing

OH I HATE YOU SO MUCH, BETRAYING ME
WHIILE I GIVE YOU MY EVERYTHING
THAT AINT SO FUCKING FAIR, HA- HA-
Oh I cant love you anymore
All you do is hate me
from the bottom of ur heart
I just wanna say goodbye
OH I WONT SMILE
ILL JUST FUCKING FLY
ILL JUST KILL MYSELF

Oh I will commit suicide right on the spot
Taking drugs on a daily I bet u dont care

Oh why am I so fucking lost
I loved you so fucking much
And love it's not getting any better
All I do is fall, all I do is love
All I do is hate
OH I HATE
How I'm losing my mind
When I'm thinking bout you
WHEN IM THINKING BOUT YOU
I CANT SEEM TO KEEP MY FOCUS
AND I WONT NOTICE HOW YOU
TELL ME THAT U HATE ME FOR MYSELF
OH I HATE THIS LIFE SO DAMN MUCH (So damn much)
CUS I LOST HER FROM MY SIDE

I feel so dead inside, can anyone save me...
I dont really wanna die...

it's not getting any better

it's not getting any better (beQUITE)

"pages of my diary" track 2/5
https://soundcloud.com/imyxno/sets/pages-of-my-diary

prod. melik
mixed by me, mastered by @nokerbforever

intro (Fruit Basket):
But isn't it a blessing to have someone care about you?
Someone who worries about your happiness
And wants to always be by your side
You know... I'd wish someone cared for me that way

chorus:
im checking my phone at 4am
and I see so many fucking texts
is it true that you hated me?
or is it true that you loved me?
And I wish you just awaited me
And I wished you would have hugged me 
But you just fucked me up, 
Why is that?
I'm implying 
that this is just lust
from your side
All this love has been trashed
Are you proud of that, its over now
let me ask you 
was it all so worth it bruh
And I know that u hate me now (lol)

verse:
I know that you hate me now
And I cannot even change that
And you always would complain that
I am not the best for you
Yet you make me feel so blue
Is it really what it means to u
Am I nothing to you?
That you go out 
and fuck someone new
the passages of time
once u made me feel so fine
taking drugs it dont matter right
living in my own hell (oh no)
Now its time to change my life

bridge (White Album 2):
That's the only reason why I volunteered to be your girlfriend
I knew that you were the only one for her
And that you had feelings for her, too
But I knew that you'd still take me
If I asked you right then

chorus:
im checking my phone at 4am
and I see so many fucking texts
is it true that you hated me?
or is it true that you loved me?
And I wish you just awaited me
And I wished you would have hugged me 
But you just fucked me up, 
Why is that?
I'm implying 
that this is just lust
from your side
All this love has been trashed
Are you proud of that, its over now
let me ask you 
was it all so worth it bruh
And I know that u

outro:
hate me now
I cant even look forward to another life
I thought I had my life figured out
Yeah you left me all alone
Yeah you left me all alone

~~ this song was made live on my twitch @imyxno :b

I really do not feel okay

I really do not feel okay (melik)

"pages of my diary" track 1/5
https://soundcloud.com/imyxno/sets/pages-of-my-diary

prod. beQUITE

mixed/mastered by me

lyrics:
In another world
I don't wanna try
And you said I shouldn't cry
I know I'm shite
And I act so shy
But it's just me inside
So don't keep on the side
I don't really wanna cry

Fill up my darkness
I go through all of this alone
Forget this weirdness
I wanna die so fucking slow
And your heart seems to empty
Is that what is in the truth
And I guess that's why
I feel so low--

Now it's time to say goodbye
And I'm shooting out my thoughts
I feel so high
I just wanna die
I would lie if I said
I didn't love you
Cuz I really did
I'm unable
Cuz I'm unstable

And you don't understand that
Put me out my misery 
I don't wanna live this life
Put me out right on the line
I lost my shine
Is this the end?
I can't really fathom

I don't wanna try again

I don't wanna try again (beQUITE)

Merry christmas everyone!!!! I hope you all stay blessed!!! <3 
And also this is a more serious song that I wrote, and I hope you enjoy it! :)

prod. beQUITE
mixed and mastered by me

lyrics:
(intro)
Inevitable
Unavoidable
I hate my damn life
Why did it come to this?

(verse 1)
I thought u were my wife
And I wish 
I lived the same way that you did
Now I know that I'm gonna die

(pre-chorus 1)
It's all over now
It's all over now
I can't change this anymore
How do I always fuck so bad
You’re out of reach
Out of range
This pressure on my soul
Baby it'll take me out so slow

(chorus)
Falling on the floor now
And I ask myself how
Do I live with this
With my pain
With my hate
Oh I am late
Im gonna fucking die
So dont tell me that I should just try
Il spread my wings and touch the sky

(verse 2)
Now I'm all alone in my home
And I wish you were right by my side
I just try to find 
what you left all so behind
I just wanna die, 
cuz you left me here to cry
So tell me why, you did this all,

(pre-chorus 2)
Cracks on my phone
Lost on my throne
I been feelin so alone
I dont know, 
where did we go?
cuz I never thought that 
you would turn into a whore 
all that ink you got up on ur skin
youre so cool

(chorus)
Falling on the floor now
And I ask myself how
Do I live with this
With my pain
With my hate
Oh I am late
Im gonna fucking die
So dont tell me that I should just try
Il spread my wings and touch the sky

desolation

Spotify ♥

desolation (beQUITE)

Happy new years once again to everybody and I hope you enjoy the first release of 2024!!!!!!
I love you all so much and I want to thank you all for supporting me to today! <3

prod. dercept, 5Head
mixed and mastered by me
cover by me

lyrics:
[intro]
Let go let go wont you just let me be
Bees all around me, it seems
I cannot save you and me

[pre-chorus]
I look up at the sky
And I feel so high too
I got the news that 
I'm gonna die soon
Baby isnt this all you wanted?
Since you always wanted me so dead

[chorus]
I stargaze in the night
I dont even wanna fight
I think bout everything you said
All these sweet white lies
They were never real
I'm trapped in my head
And I dont even wanna leave

I don't wanna fuck
I only wanted love
All my memories 
They fade away so quick
My time is slowly running out
But these memories they (won't) stick
I know baby, there's no doubt
But I don't really wanna die

[bridge]
All these times I miss them very bad
I hope this year is not as bad
I wish I could rewind 
The times that I miss

[pre-verse]
And my life really kinda sucks
Struggling to walk a straight line
And I fucked up even this night
Might this all just be a test? 
Cuz I cant get any rest 
Babe, you're all up in my mind

[verse]
You all call me pathetic
Smith & Wesson to my head
Cuz you made me 
Wanna leave so many times
Now you call me a piece of shit
And whys that?

[bridge]
I wish I was with you right now
Talking bout how we lost each other
In the worst time
And I miss you
And thats so true

[pre-chorus]
I look up at the sky
And I feel so high too
I got the news that 
I'm gonna die soon
Baby isnt this all you wanted?
Since you always wanted me so dead

[chorus]
I stargaze in the night
I dont even wanna fight
I think bout everything you said
All these sweet white lies
They were never real
I'm trapped in my head
And I dont even wanna leave

I don't wanna fuck
I only wanted love
All my memories 
They fade away so quick
My time is slowly running out
But these memories they (won't) stick
I know baby, there's no doubt
But I don't really wanna die

stargazing

stargazing (dercept x 5head)

I hope you all enjoy this one, I love you all <3

featuring @erxn_music
prod. probelad

lyrics:
(chorus: i'm yxno)
I can feel my eyes lose its focus
In my own mind there's no notice
I can see myself fall down to my lotus
It's so dead, in my head, it's all dread
Need a way out, or better myself
And find someone, or keep saying
It's all gonna be okay, so I lay back down
I'm not in your lair and I hate this now
Feelings all erased, I hate this place
I feel like no one even cares anymore
Drown myself in anxiety I keep losing now

(ERXN)
I guess these thoughts thats in my head they need some help
all these thoughts I keep on asking to myself 
it Takes so long I guess my feelings never help 
They never help 
I think my eyes too black to see any where I go 
I need someone there to take me where I need to go 
Everywhere I look I see demons left and right 
I need somewhere else to go somewhere I can go reside

(bridge: i'm yxno)
I feel so lost, and I wish you saved me love
Say it's all a game say it's all a game
Cos you couldnt even talk to me
Instead you cheated on me
Say it's not fair, say it's not fair

(chorus: i'm yxno)
I can feel my eyes lose its focus
In my own mind there's no notice
I can see myself fall down to my lotus
It's so dead, in my head, it's all dread
Need a way out, or better myself
And find someone, or keep saying
It's all gonna be okay, so I lay back down
I'm not in your lair and I hate this now
Feelings all erased, I hate this place
I feel like no one even cares anymore
Drown myself in anxiety I keep losing now

I need a way out

I need a way out w/ ERXN (probelad)

BURY ME WITH ALL MY FRIENDS

I hope you all enjoy this one, I tried something different this time!<3

spotify - https://open.spotify.com/track/4SSU2E5l3MticZxOzvTXic?si=fefb7751e4b54320

scroll amv - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GwXzmj9AsuE&pp=ygUGc2Nyb2xs

prod. sorrow bringer
mixed/mastered by me

lyrics
⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯
// intro
I got a lot of snakes inside my life
I don't wanna meet no one at this time
now I'm only reading through my lines
walking through the waves, all these pines
I cant get them out my head, oh I miss my friend

// chorus
Feeling confined in this room inside my place
And I wish I knew all these fucking signs
All my friends taking drugs, THC and the lines
In this day and age I feel so lost
Yeah I loved but what is the cost?
Cos the only thing you did was break my heart
And the cause of my anxiety yeah it's all you
So how can you say I'm the one who's in the wrong?
Cos I thought you were my last one
But you left me like I was a no one
Now I'm drinking every day-

// verse
Hoping I can forget you
Feeling paranoid inside this space
And my eyes go black every time I think of you and I
Memories of us they fade so quick
Could you stop begging me to come back
I feel like a robot every time I think of you
Cos there was no decision on my side
You make feel so shite
And I wrote my heart and soul out
But what did you do?!
(FUCK ANOTHER GUY)
Clear yourself into the way to better yourself

// chorus
Feeling confined in this room inside my place
And I wish I knew all these fucking signs
All my friends taking drugs, THC and the lines
In this day and age I feel so lost
Yeah I loved but what is the cost?
Cos the only thing you did was break my heart
And the cause of my anxiety yeah it's all you
So how can you say I'm the one who's in the wrong?
Cos I thought you were my last one
But you left me like I was a no one
Now I'm drinking every d-d-d-day

// bridge
She made me feel so fucking blue
And she'd hang out with her friends
Till they buzz and drink some booze
And then she cheated on me 
And she left me with all these dues
But then tells me that she still wants me
And I don't trust her (I can't forget you)

// outro
BURY ME WITH ALL MY FRIENDS
COS I DON'T WANNA LIVE ANYMORE
I LOVE WHEN YOU LIE
I LOVE WHEN YOU DIE
WHEN I SEE YOUR GUY
ILL MAKE SURE TO KILL HIM 
RIGHT ON THE SPOT

(I don't really care about your-)

AND IM LOSING ALL MY VISIONS
FALLING STRAIGHT DOWN TO MY DEATH
WASTING MY LAST BREATH ON YOU AND ME
BUT I HATE YOU BRO
OH YOUR COLLISION IS THE REASON
WHY I'VE BEEN SO BROKEN
HOW CAN YOU NOT SEE THIS NOW
I LOVED YOU SO MUCH

plotting my own death

plotting my own death (sorrow bringer)

I hope you all enjoy this one! I am now planning on releasing every 2 weeks for a while since I have a few songs ready! <3

prod. dercept & 5head
youtube - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JElBQN5slDI
spotify - https://open.spotify.com/track/1WSbx9sJKhdkEWLp6JLEu7?si=6525ee8b389645ed

lyrics:

(chorus)
Oh I think I fucked up, fucked up
I don't wanna die, I dont wanna die
Can you maybe walk up, walk up
I been trying not to lose my focus
I am wondering if you even notice
Heart deformed like a dead lotus
Don't walk on so quick, I feel so sick
You seem so scared of me, am I even real?
Can you maybe seal the deal?
Before I release all of this
And turn into a ghost
Maybe then you'd understand

(bridge)
Baby I needed you the most
Cause now I feel so lost
I knew you couldn't save me
And you only broke me down

(verse)
break me down, break me down
and you only send me shivers down my spine
and you wanted me to lie and to say that im fine
cos yu never rly cared and I knew it
i just wanted to be nice

Send a shot into my brain
I only feel this pain
I wanna go while it rains
I know you wanna see me faint
As you wished me death anyways
In this day and age, I feel so lost
Only 21 and already wana die

(bridge 2)
Already knowing
That I'm gonna die early in this life
Heya dont go now, I love you more
Oh baby I forget about her
No sense in a way this spares

dead lotus

dead lotus (dercept x 5head)

I hope you all enjoy this one, this is one is nearly a year old now and I remixed the whole track, big thanks to zaideck for the feature and I wish everybody who's reading this a wonderful day, I love you all! 🤍

cover by @br444ins 🖤
prod. melik
featuring @zaideck
mix master by me
spotify - https://open.spotify.com/track/4W8iXkxqT6qtd4pcQSEAqJ?si=7a7f16fc65b244a0

lyrics:
// chorus
i been feeling rubbish
havent ate in 3 days
life is such a bitch
and what u up to now
can i tell you how much
i love you from the bottom of my heart
or is that not okay
oh i miss ur touch
now my world is grey
and i only wanted u 2 stay
laying on the floor
leave my feelings out the door
and you were the only one
that i ever adored

// verse: zaideck
I couldn't fathom the future
All of a sudden Ima loser
Put my hope in one basket
Saw her wasted
And she used me like a pawn
Now I'm forsaken, I'm shaking
Any love that I had is mistaken
I'll take it
Damn
I wouldn't ask for her, bro
I wouldn't talk to her, bro
She got no self control, bro
She is not like before, bro
My head on a swivel
I tried to keep it civil
She's out of her mind
Her words sounded superficial

// bridge
always had a problem
wont go for another day
cos i have you in my mind
and not by my side
now i think about us every time
that i go to sleep at night

// chorus
i been feeling rubbish
havent ate in 3 days
life is such a bitch
and what u up to now
can i tell you how much
i love you from the bottom of my heart
or is that not okay
oh i miss ur touch
now my world is grey
and i only wanted u 2 stay
laying on the floor
leave my feelings out the door
and you were the only one
that i ever adored

wanted u 2 stay

wanted u 2 stay w/ zaideck (melik)

IN THE NIGHT I WILL DISAPPEAR

I hope you all have had an amazing week and month!! I just wanted to send love to anybody who listens to my music, I love you all! <3

youtube - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3YJLPs_sXdc
spotify - https://open.spotify.com/track/3KnBv9GVs8txlrYwz7JJg3?si=23bd18e73cf646f6

prod. @greyroxx
featuring @elox1m <3
cover by @qswoaosefg0b (https://vk.com/eraeraryo)

lyrics:
@imyxno:
I didn't know you were playing with my heart
Oh, let it go, oh, let it go, I cannot live here anymore
Breaking every single time, I tried so hard
Lost myself on the way, I am not him anymore

Say, do you regret anything, you pulled my wings

Thinking I'm your puppet on a damn string
Hear the cracks, I'm breaking
With my skull on the ground, I'm shaking
Bad choices in my mind, I know you hate me bro
Why did you lie I cannot comprehend this sight
I would have to agree if you said that I sucked
I'll let my spirit go, I don't think it matters
In the night I will disappear,
And you won't miss me, right?

@elox1m:
я не хочу возвращаться я ненавижу их
пропали цветофильтры вижу серым мир
пропадаю в миг
цветы расцветают за счёт моей крови

я уверен что самое холодное тоже тает
на моём плече она я помню как мы засыпали вдвоём

и для нас звёзды упали
для тебя я не занят делами
сейчас к тебе выезжаю

@imyxno:
I am on my way to heaven, hope to meet you here
I hope I have a chance remove my sins right there
Or am I going to end up in hell
I don’t know what I can do anymore, Im not well

Push me over the edge, I know you date this guy
Why couldn’t you just be honest instead of lie
I don’t know why I trusted you, I hate myself

betrayal

Spotify ❤️

betrayal w/ elox1m (greyrock)

Thanks to @shyncute for the amazing beat and fuuryourea for the awesome cover! The song is inspired by my favourite anime, White Album. 

spotify - https://open.spotify.com/track/4TwRYfPypZrNz1XiHa6r4t
youtube - https://youtu.be/xeBHPZhDvAE

cover by @qswoaosefg0b (https://vk.com/eraeraryo)

lyrics:
I didn't wanted you to leave
Il keep my feelings to me
Now I cannot feel so I freeze
I'm cutting my wrists
Hoping you would see

I am stuck inside a screen I feel out of reach
I'm crying in 2D, wish we'd never meet
As I'm hoping for a breach let me ask you
Why'd you cheat? Cos I'm not even real
You're so cruel, now I cannot breathe
Drowning in the ocean, voices wishing me to die
I have no emotions, so sever me my darling
Know I'm gonna die in this pain
And I take the blame
But my heart still breaks the same

The same
The same...

Left me out in vain, I'm trying so damn hard
But I cant trust myself, hate myself or cut my skin
I'm feeling despair as I'm crying out for help
Life is so unfair, when nobody really cares
And then you cheated on me every single day
And you expect me to love you back
But I refuse to be your fall-back plan

Oh I knew I wasn't enough
Fell apart when times got rough
But I was blinded by your lies
I didn't wanted you to leave


I am stuck inside a screen I feel out of reach
I'm crying in 2D, wish we'd never meet
As I'm hoping for a breach let me ask you
Why'd you cheat? Cos I'm not even real
You're so cruel, now I cannot breathe
Drowning in the ocean, voices wishing me to die
I have no emotions, so sever me my darling
Know I'm gonna die in this pain
And I take the blame
But my heart still breaks the same

But I don't love you anymore
I have unhealable wounds
Time wont restore what we once had

:)

the feelings i couldn't speak out

I hope you all enjoy this song, and I hope you had a great week as well!! Thanks so much to ERXN for the awesome feature, this song has been sitting in the vault for a while <3

prod. vuksai
featuring @erxn_music
cover by @qswoaosefg0b (https://vk.com/eraeraryo)

lyrics

hook: me
Make me realise you just used me in the first place
Cos I tried to make amends I tried to make it work
But I think my efforts were dismissed, I feel so hurt
Now I'm laying in the worst place, oh I hate this all
I'm feeling so alone

verse: erxn
and when she tell me that im self centered
I stay centered
Keep myself alone and stuck cuz im fed up 
these feelings set the tone they cut they keep pressing 
I fall into this tomb of love and depression 
My body wasn't made to break I keep stressin 
think I might of done too much to feel better 
but I know all these feelings stuck so im dead or alive

hook 2x: me
Make me realise you just used me in the first place
Cos I tried to make amends I tried to make it work
But I think my efforts were dismissed, I feel so hurt
Now I'm laying in the worst place, oh I hate this all
I'm feeling so alone

(I need somebody by my side)

verse: me
Please don't let it slide
I need you by my side
For you I'd do anything
Maybe something everlasting
So let's reignite the flame
And bring love to life again
I don't wanna die anymore
Iv tried cos my life's at war
Nothing else is on my mind
You're the one I always find
Stay with me, don't ever go
You're the one I truly want

hook 2x: me
Make me realise you just used me in the first place
Cos I tried to make amends I tried to make it work
But I think my efforts were dismissed, I feel so hurt
Now I'm laying in the worst place, oh I hate this all
I'm feeling so alone

verse: me
I remember when you called my name
And now I won't ever feel the same
I'm stuck inside your game
Wish I could just erase all the memories
Cos what are we now?
We're enemies, won't stop thinking bout you for centuries---

i think i need you

i think i need you w/ ERXN

I hope you all enjoy this song, I tried a bit more different style to give a little more variety and to improve my mixing skills! I also hope everyone has been doing well lately <3

cover by @br444ins
prod. dera x gaxillic
----------------------
lyrics:
(intro)
Oh, I hate falling in love
Oh, I hate I’m self destructive
My feelings never matter 
it’s always them, not me

(chorus)
it doesn’t make sense
iv messed up so many times
i can’t make up my mind
what do I really need?
it hurts so much knowing 
i’m not gonna be alive
why do people treat me different
i’m an angel in disguise
i hate everything I do
i don’t love who I’ve become
when I had you, you gave me the world
then left me numb

(verse)
I cannot trust anybody anymore
I don’t like my life
So how could you either?
I don’t even know myself
But I know my friends don’t care, they’re not truly there
Would it hurt them if I died today or just be out of touch?
Does anybody even listen to the words that I say?
It’s a shame I live this way
I thought I could be happy someday

(bridge)
But you pushed me way below
Oh-
Oh, I hate I’m self destructive
My feelings never matter 
it’s always them, not me

(chorus)
it doesn’t make sense
iv messed up so many times
i can’t make up my mind
what do I really need?
it hurts so much knowing 
i’m not gonna be alive
why do people treat me different
i’m an angel in disguise
i hate everything I do
i don’t love who I’ve become
when I had you, you gave me the world
then left me numb

(outro)
Oh I hate you, oh

self destructive

self destructive (dera x gaxillic)

☆ Heartbreak over and over </3 ☆

I hope you enjoy this song, I will make a bit more songs in this typical style as I really like it and I hope so do you, I hope everyone of you has a really good day, ilysm!!!!

prod. vuksai
cover edited by @fallenengel (dinho)
Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/track/0R2XD5G9rzM2DB1I6LFXax?si=3e1da35d8be840b6
YouTube (+ lyrics) - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=taCUdS8QBf8

lyrics:
(chorus)
Yeah, you pushed me down, cos you're upset
How can you leave now that I'm dread
Painting the walls red, you wouldn’t address
„Send me a text and tell me the truth“,
That's what I said in the past

You pushed me down cos you were mad
How can you leave me feeling so bad
Painting the walls red, you wouldn’t address
„Send me a text and tell me the truth“,
That's what I said in the past

(verse)
Now you said to me that you're in love with somebody who I'm not
Now I'm writeing my own story in this book, nobody saw
Getting high off my drugs, it makes me feel a way,
away from everything, twilights on the way
Stuck inside this psychosis, its way too late
Now you left me for somebody else
And I hate how my life rules above me now

(bridge)
Painting my own photo ina certain hue,
black & white, that's my heart, 
Heartbreak over and over...
Is it way too much to ask for something nice? 

(chorus)
Yeah, you pushed me down, cos you're upset
How can you leave now that I'm dread
Painting the walls red, you wouldn’t address
„Send me a text and tell me the truth“,
That's what I said in the past

You pushed me down cos you were mad
How can you leave me feeling so bad
Painting the walls red, you wouldn’t address
„Send me a text and tell me the truth“,
That's what I said in the past

(verse/outro)
Was it really him you wanted to pursue?
Cos fuck Ive been waiting here for too long
Realising everything you did was wrong
In the end it was just toxic lies
Cos you're still here and you probably hear
The words I been spewing out just for you
And you make me feel so blue
I feel like a doom, make me doom
Now I'm all alone in my room

push me down (vuksai)

"chapter of the shattered" track 7/7
https://soundcloud.com/imyxno/sets/chapter-of-the-shattered

prod. dera, young freezy

mixed/mastered by me

lyrics:
(chorus: me)
I guess this is the end
I still miss you till this day
I wish I could of saved me and you in the same place
I hate how it goes, I hate how my life flows
Hating myself forever, I did this, to myself
I cant blame anyone
The years now over, 2024
It's been a bliss, nothing that I wished for

(verse: @caroelin)
Gave up on love
Then you came in my life
Now I'm so confused
Got me mesmerized
When you gaze into my eyes
It's like I'm watching the sunrise of my life (yeah)
You give me purpose and I feel so fine
Idk how i got you but you are so divine
I swear you are the light at the end of a tunnel
You shine so bright

(chorus: me)
I guess this is the end
I still miss you till this day
I wish I could of saved me and you in the same place
I hate how it goes, I hate how my life flows
Hating myself forever, I did this, to myself
I cant blame anyone
The years now over, 2024
It's been a bliss, nothing that I wished for

this is the end, goodbye

this is the end, goodbye (dera x young freezy)

"chapter of the shattered" track 6/7
https://soundcloud.com/imyxno/sets/chapter-of-the-shattered

prod. whiteei

mixed/mastered by me

lyrics:
(intro: me)
Oh now I'm all alone
Please dont hit my phone
Youl end up in a lake
Life feels like a waste

(chorus: @caroelin)
going crazy in the bar w friends
have anxiety
inside of me
and doing xans
got some lean in the benz
shawty say she love me
but she a gespenst
take a hit of my vape
swear these people, they're fake
love myself for my own sake
holy shit im jerking it like drake
fuck a hoe
she stole my soul
sniff some blow
show up late to the show
get scared of my own shadow
i think i should let her go

(bridge: me)
Oh I trusted in a demon woah
Blowing up my phone
You're such a nuisance bro

(verse: me)
all these xannies in my body
leading me all to lobotomy
leave it all to me (2x)
iv bee in my zone smoking vapes 
as the sun goes down
you never listened to me
now youre all upon my dick
tryna hit this lick
robbing stores as i go
wait thats a dream
snap back to reality
flexing money as i go
lean back in my cup
selling all these drugs
promised never to

(pre-chorus: @caroelin)
high as hell in an uber
im a silly goober
holy shit is that a cougar
2 vodkas on my motor scooter
say hi to my computer
omfg i think i hear an intruder

(chorus: @caroelin)
going crazy in the bar w friends
have anxiety
inside of me
and doing xans
got some lean in the benz
shawty say she love me
but she a gespenst
take a hit of my vape
swear these people, they're fake
love myself for my own sake
holy shit im jerking it like drake
fuck a hoe
she stole my soul
sniff some blow
show up late to the show
get scared of my own shadow
i think i should let her go

(outro)
Oh hey, I was just bout to go to bed
I know we couldent skype tonight but
That's all right!! Good night girl ic u tmrw

taking drugs (all the time)

taking drugs (all the time) [whiteei]

"chapter of the shattered" track 5/7
https://soundcloud.com/imyxno/sets/chapter-of-the-shattered

prod. tenketsu, sabrr

mixed/mastered by me

lyrics:
(chorus: me)
another day goes by
without u by my side
Lurking in the night
and i hate that you lied
and I wish I didnt cry
i feel so bad,
so took you back
i'm not fine
got no shine
i wanna die
can u leave me alone

[verse: CARØLIN]
back then i was so free
back we you didnt love me
made me find drugs, discovery
that's why i feel so free
doing xans and watching dvd
my head feel like its undersea
maybe i should do another 3
turn me into a banshee
thats the side you dont see
i say that you love me
you say that you disagree
made my heart broke like debris
now that you dropped the key
atleast i can be free

[bridge]
yeah i thought you were alright
till the day i cried
looking at the sky tonight
but it doesnt feel right
now im alone thats why i write
eventhough i feel some spite
maybe i should text you
since youre still my boo
and thats when-

(chorus: me)
another day goes by
without u by my side
Lurking in the night
and i hate that you lied
and I wish I didnt cry
i feel so bad,
so took you back
i'm not fine
got no shine
i wanna die
can u leave me alone

leave me alone

leave me alone (tenketsu x sabrr)

"chapter of the shattered" track 4/7
https://soundcloud.com/imyxno/sets/chapter-of-the-shattered

prod. moneykidd

mixed/mastered by me

lyrics:
(chorus: me)
Oh, I think you know, that I miss you so much
You're the only one I’ve ever loved before
And I wish you told me that you needed me
As you run your fingers through my hair so sweet
I don’t wanna go against love no more
Even though so many tries to knock on my door
I got my eyes on you, I ain’t ever leaving you, my babe
Hating this world, but with you it’s heaven made

(verse: @caroelin)
got my shit so fucked up
told me it was a true love
told me you would stay ya
dancing in the rain ya
talking bout the ring u wanted
got me rly fcked up
got me rly fcked up
got me rly fcked up
now im all alone
sitting by the river
watch the sunset
hope it stay down foreva
make it dark foreva
like my heart n my head

(bridge: me)
For everything I did, I’ll stay till eternity
I know my time is fading, but I’ll hold you tight
Maybe you can save me, baby bring me back to life
I thank you for everything you’ve done for me
I know I fall short, but I’ll still try to be what you need
Feeling so lost since you walked away

(chorus: me)
Oh, I think you know, that I miss you so much
You're the only one I’ve ever loved before
And I wish you told me that you needed me
As you run your fingers through my hair so sweet
I don’t wanna go against love no more
Even though so many tries to knock on my door
I got my eyes on you, I ain’t ever leaving you, my babe
Hating this world, but with you it’s heaven made

heaven made

heaven made (moneykidd)

"chapter of the shattered" track 3/7
https://soundcloud.com/imyxno/sets/chapter-of-the-shattered

prod. beQUITE

mixed/mastered by me

lyrics:
(intro: me)

(Ai Hoshino's Death Scene)

Oh I think this isn't all my fault
Went out and put all my feelings on halt

(chorus: me)
Now that it's all over
I'm just tryna move on
I can't think or go out
My love is gone
Oh just walk on
I don't rly run, no I don't
Did I ever win or did I lose?
Oh, I cannot choose

(pre-verse: @caroelin)
made me believe in love
now i gotta move on
all i do is sob now
yea im crying out loud

(verse: @caroelin)
saw our future - ahead of us
now ur gone n i love the drugs again
(woah woah)
whyd i fall in love again
(woah woah)
fk it i give up again
(woah woah)

(bridge: @caroelin)
opened up to u & told u what im scared of
took my walls down, trusted you to hold me
now I’m standing here, feeling lost and lonely
guess I hoped you'd be the one to stay

(chorus: me)
Now that it's all over
I'm just tryna move on
I can't think or go out
My love is gone
Oh just walk on
I don't rly run, no I don't
Did I ever win or did I lose?
Oh, I cannot choose

moving on

moving on (beQUITE)

"chapter of the shattered" track 2/7
https://soundcloud.com/imyxno/sets/chapter-of-the-shattered

prod. Ciche&Jarn

mixed/mastered by me

lyrics:

(intro: me)
Soon I'm going down, I'm going low
I wish I knew it now nobodie's around
Devil in disguise, I know my ground
Dont you go leave me now, wounds 
on my body I don't wanna talk, 

(verse: me)
Fuck, I dont wanna rage
Now u say you're not gonna change
Saying something to you bro
Not a lover to me hope it shows
When u told me that u loved me
I knew it wasn't gonna last

(bridge: me)
I hate every single thing that you said to me
Blood stains on my notes to you
I hope that you knew that 
you meant so much to me
Now my love is overdue

(verse: @caroelin)
spent 6 years tryna get out this hole
but I think that problem lies within my soul
sometimes I wish my feelings were just dull
i'm so jealous of people turn to skulls
sold my soul to the devil in disguise
lost myself and my feelings in your fkn eyes
i hope this love it never dies
but holy shit im so scared of goodbyes
you know im lying when i say im fine
n all i wanna do is call u mine
have a sip of my wine,
i swear to god babe you are so divine
so pls call just call my phone
cus all i wanna do is hear ur moan

devil in disguise

devil in disguise (Ciche&Jarn)

"chapter of the shattered" track 1/7
https://soundcloud.com/imyxno/sets/chapter-of-the-shattered

prod. wetmall

mixed/mastered by me

lyrics:
(intro: me)
And I been missing you so much lately
I don't wanna think about something else

(verse: @caroelin)
yea im missing you so much lately
we coulda been so great together greatly
yea i love you so much ima just be straightly
you got me feeling so damn sedately
yea i feel so sedated
too bad you turned on me, looking dirty
got me addicted to the god damn percy
got me all messed up and shit and acting flirty

(chorus: me)
Now I'm writing you all these love letters
And I'm sorry if I acted up, acted like a prick
My heart shatters when I have to see u cry
Cos I want you only for myself in this life
And I know I have been not the best 
But I promise that I can be your best, I don't wanna lie
Keep this all lowkey, I know I had my wrongs
Can you maybe please tell me so long
How can I make this up to you, I hate myself

(verse: @caroelin)
yea i hate myself so much
ever since the day u left my side
i miss you so much yea you were my lives guide
ever since the day you left i cried
in your love i took so much pride
yea i fucking need you by my side
i just want you to know that ive tried
dont know why you lied
we coulda been together aside

(chorus: me)
Now I'm writing you all these love letters
And I'm sorry if I acted up, acted like a prick
My heart shatters when I have to see u cry
Cos I want you only for myself in this life
And I know I have been not the best 
But I promise that I can be your best, I don't wanna lie
Keep this all lowkey, I know I had my wrongs
Can you maybe please tell me so long
How can I make this up to you, I hate myself

you left me

you left me (wetmall)

I hope you all enjoy this one <3

I will continue to make a few songs here and there, I am sober for about 4 months now and I feel so much better and I realise my decisions from the past were not correct, I apologise to everybody who I may have disappointed.

I recorded this with my analogue gear which I am very proud of :D

prod. vuksai, ucv

lyrics:
Oh fuck I feel so bad, replaying all these memories
Around my heart and head, it feels so wrong
Keep imagning the good things coming back
But fuck I didnt know, I didnt know, I lack so much
I hate my life, this is horrible, all of you betraying me
It feels even more enraging to my fading mind
Stuck inside this screen, stuck inside this bind
Leaving me all just behind, Im all alone, oh, once again

Eating up right on my brain, I dont miss these days
But maybe you can stay maybe oh just maybe,
dont leave me now, nvm youre already out
Psychosis keep on hitting me like a mil falls
No way I have a way out of here
Now I'm stuck in this darkness forever
Can somebody get me out here
I hate this place, its such a shame
I loved too much, now Im hollow
All these people dopping lovely words 
around me now, nothing but a illusion
to my head, I dont think love is real
Its all just delusion, its not real fuck oh no

delusion

delusion (vuksai + ucv)

This is an older collab I haven't planned to release but I thought this was pretty decent so here you go. I hope you enjoy it! ~

prod. melik & sochi

featuring @counterfeitboy & @akasukii

lyrics:
(chorus: me)
Iv been going insane the way that 
I keep thinking 'bout you now
I can only say that I love you so much, 
maybe never leave my side, maybe stay alive
Its making me so happy, oh
I dont wanna be alone
Can u pls save me from my misery
I dont wanna die, I dont wanna die
S-S-Save me from myself, before I make u cry
Can you maybe gimme a call
maybe then youd understand
Just so never go, I miss you, woah

(verse 1, @counterfeitboy)
(Woah oh, oh)
cant escape you, it's all i've ever known
tryna figure out on which way i should go
never ever wanna leave you alone
(i cant ever be the one)
i tried to take it one day at a time
(will you be the one)
if i can't ill probably lose my mind
(save me from myself)
i'm so done with your pretty little lies
(can you save me)
you're just a waste of time

(chorus: me)
Iv been going insane the way that 
I keep thinking 'bout you now
I can only say that I love you so much, 
maybe never leave my side, maybe stay alive
Its making me so happy, oh
I dont wanna be alone
Can u pls save me from my misery
I dont wanna die, I dont wanna die
S-S-Save me from myself, before I make u cry
Can you maybe gimme a call
maybe then youd understand
Just so never go, I miss you, woah

(verse 2, @akasukii)
I miss you, oh I want you
I need u more than anything
Dont tell me, this is how its gonna end with u and me
Cos I love you the same
And you're only in my brain
So, dont let me go, 
I just wanna know If youd stay 
Would you still love me the same?
Holding onto something that might break
Oh, why did we change?

i'm yxno

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