"Talking and Leaving" 

I sit on a folding chair in this motel, look up at the sky 
A shiver is chasing its way up, its way up my spine 
This desert is cold and it’ll leave you spent and hang you up to dry 
It'll hang you up to dry 

You've got a mighty subtle way  
Of bringing me down 
Although you’re a thousand miles away  
From this Podunk town 
But like a stray dog for his supper, you just keep coming, keep coming around 
You keep coming around 

I’d like to say that I’ve taken the space to reflect 
On the time we’ve been apart  
And how it’s been spent 
But you know me, 
I won’t let myself breath 
Long enough to  
Hear my own breathe 

That old Boy Scout saying keeps winding its way through my mind 
"To take only memories and leave only footsteps behind" 
But honey you weigh my pockets down, 
Drag my feet,  
To take in a memory of you 
Leaves me weak and with a 
Sharp pain in my side 
How did it all get so mutually 
Unkind? 

I lay in my bed let the clock taunt me out of my sleep 
Time is like water in this town it may stick stick around but its quality simply won’t keep 
Time is like water  
But love is like mud 
It’s a habit that hardens 
And cakes in the sun 
Comes off in flakes 

One  
By  
One 
One 
By  
One 
One  
By  
One


from Irrevery Volume I, released November 19, 2017 
Music and lyrics by Paige Johnson-Brown 

Tom Csatari (Guitar) 
Paige Johnson-Brown (Vox) 
Nick Jozwiak (Bass, background vox) 
Cameron Kapoor (Guitar) 
Mack Williamson (Drums) 

Illustration by Zuzu Snyder
license

Talking And Leaving

"Pornography" 

Well you know I’m complete  
I’m complete 
I’m complete 
I’m completely the same 

My skin, my eyes, my heart, and my mind 
Still play their games 

You know I can still lay  
Still lay  
Still lay it out on the line 

So why bother  
Why bother  
Why bother 
Asking if I’m doing fine? 

You think you've got claim  
You've got claim  
You've got claim 
On the truth 

But the truth isn’t black, black and white 
It’s black, black and blue 

I bet you still 
Rumble, make hell  
When disrupted in your lair 

God knows you can’t poke  
You can’t poke  
You can’t poke an angry bear 

Well big bear beware  
You never never never never never  
Can quite prepare 

For how much another person  
Can get get get in your hair 

Aw let it out, 
Go on, complain  
Who the hell said a thing about fair? 

My word  
My word  
My word 
Used to be good in this town 

I know that some past indiscretions have 
Run my name to the ground 

And have left me chewing tongue 
Unable to make make a sound 

Ah but look at you all, 
All high and mighty, 
Call call calling me out 

You think you got claim  
You got claim  
You got claim 
On the truth 

But the truth isn’t black, black and white 
It’s black, black and blue 

Just another one 
Conspiracisizing  
About a woman 

How she done you done you wrong 
And how you took it like a dog, 
How you would’ve stuck it to her 
If she could have stuck around a little longer  
Longer 
Longer  
Longer 

The full extent  
Of her sexual history 
And my my my all the minute details  
of her body  

Little boy little boy where’d you pick pick up  
All this hate hate hateful vapidity 

Little boy little boy where’d you pick pick up 
All this hate hate hateful vapidity 

Blame it on too much weed,  
Guitar,  
Bad company 

Self-consciousness 
And childishness 
And pride, pretension, vanity,  
And porn  
And porn  
And porn  
Pornography 

You know I'm complete  
I'm complete 
I'm complete  
I'm completely the same


from Irrevery Volume I, released November 19, 2017 
Music and lyrics by Paige Johnson-Brown 

Tom Csatari (Guitar) 
Darren Denman (Keyboard) 
Paige Johnson-Brown (Vox) 
Nick Jozwiak (Bass, background vox) 
Cameron Kapoor (Guitar) 
Mack Williamson (Drums) 

Illustration by Mark Gardner

Pornography

"If I Didn't Love You" 

The stars up ahead 
And my own bones for my bed 

I lift my heart discreetly 
And the sky leans down and greets me 

Singin, 
"If I didn't have to share my light with you 
I'd glow brighter than I'm able to" 

"If I didn't have to share my light with you 
I'd glow brighter than I'm able to" 

You slip inside my thoughts again 
And fulfill my sick addiction 

To seeking disconnection 
Though my heart thrashes in objection 
Singin, "If I didn't love you it'd be easier" 
"If I didn't love you it'd be fine" 

"If I didn't love you it'd be easier" 
"If I didn't love you it'd be fine" 

Darkness may surround me 
Strain to stretch its claws around me 

But lightness always grounds me 
Illuminates, grips, and surrounds me 

Singin, "If I didn't love you it'd be easier" 
"If I didn't love you it'd be fine" 

"If I didn't love you it'd be easier" 
"If I didn't love you it'd be fine"


from Irrevery Volume I, released November 19, 2017 
Music and lyrics by Paige Johnson-Brown 

Tom Csatari (Guitar) 
Paige Johnson-Brown (Vox) 
Nick Jozwiak (Bass, background vox) 
Cameron Kapoor (Guitar) 
Mack Williamson (Drums) 

Illustration by Katie Gross
license

If I Didn't Love You

"Don't Call" 

Don't call 
To tell me you're leaving 

Don't call 
To say that you're gone 

A telephone line can't restore peace of mind 

Don't call 
Don't call 

Don't call 
To tell me you're done, through, fed up with my shit 

Don't call 
To tell me the bullet it needs to get bit 

You expect me to act rationally but how rational can you expect me to be when you tear me apart and pull me apart in this way 

Don't call 
Don't call 

Knock on my door 
Rattle my can 

Settle the score 
Face to face 

Man to man 
Man to man 
Man to man 

Don't call 
Don't call 

It don't have to be a fight 
We don't have to let the battle unfold 

But if there has to be a war 
The war doesn't need to be cold 

Don't run 
You know that there's no way to hide from the truth 

Don't turn your head away from me 
You know that you're just rubbing salt in the wound 

Stand up straight 
Face the facts 

It's not your words 
It's your actions 

That speak what you're trying to say 
Don't call


from Irrevery Volume I, released November 19, 2017 
Music and lyrics by Paige Johnson-Brown 

Tom Csatari (Guitar) 
Paige Johnson-Brown (Vox) 
Nick Jozwiak (Bass, background vox) 
Cameron Kapoor (Guitar) 
Mack Williamson (Drums) 

Illustration by Erik Freer

Don't Call

"What Kind of Loving" 

What's that peaking through the curtains, creeping, staring, looking right at you and me 
With that horror in its eyes as if it's seeing something I have yet to see

It's that same damn haunting question 
Keeps on coming vividly to me in dreams 

I've been avoiding been avoiding it 
But now it hits me sharp and clearly 

Asking, "On the day the day I die 
What kind what kind of loving will I leave behind?" 

"On the day the day I die 
What kind what kind of loving will I leave behind?" 

God knows I've fumbled with my judgment,  
put good fortune on the line line here and there 

I know I've left some things behind me,  
writhing twisting in the heat heat of despair 

Though I can coax myself to sleep, convinced it couldn't matter 
Who could care 

That same damn haunting question keeps breathing down my neck and hang hang hanging in the air 

Asking, "On the day the day I die" 
What kind what kind of loving will I leave behind?" 

"On the day the day I die 
What kind what kind of loving will I leave behind?" 

Red red red comes flooding flooding in 
Drown drown drowning out and clouding my vision 

It's the vein thicken, rib sticking, jaw hitting floor 
Wanting more, wanting more 

It's the pounding at the door 
That we all must answer for 

It's the things within your reach 
It's slick mistress and harsh teacher 

It's the slurring of the speech 
More than dare to eat a peach 
It's to tear in with your teeth and let the juices dribble down your chin 

Red red red comes flooding flooding in 
Brings you to the floor 
Begging for more 
Begging for more 

And then you see 
What it is that you've been standing for 

On the day the day I die 
What kind what kind of loving will I leave behind?


from Irrevery Volume I, released November 19, 2017 
Music and lyrics by Paige Johnson-Brown 

Tom Csatari (Guitar) 
Darren Denman (Keyboard) 
Paige Johnson-Brown (Vox) 
Nick Jozwiak (Bass, background vox) 
Cameron Kapoor (Guitar) 
Mack Williamson (Drums) 

Illustration by Jade Fusco

What Kind Of Loving

"One Toned Chord" 

I know, 
I've always known 
You'll go, 
You always go. 

I know, 
I've always known 
You'll go, 
You always go. 

In unison, 
A harmony: 
One toned chord 
Resonating in me; 
Eternal, 
Internal 
Symphony. 

A self-fulfilling prophecy, 
Depicted in a tapestry 
That hovers like a canopy 
And drops and gathers just like tea leaves, 

Becomes clear to me in vivid dreams 
And rings out pure and sweet 
Like an honest song for the bereaved, 
Just desperately, 
Singing, 
"I'm fine 
I'm fine 
I'm fine 
On my own." 

My heart grows heavy 
While the world gets lighter. 
I must go on 
Despite her being gone Forever 
Forever, 
Out of reach. 

That brittle bird mortality 
Swoops in on a chilling breeze 
That sorrowfully gathers speed 
And rushes in 
Just like lightning. 

And I'm surrounded by my memory, 
Old sweet enemy 
Leaves me haunted, blinded, staggering, 

Begging, 
"Sing for me 
And I'll survive 
I'll survive 
I'll survive 
On my own." 

I know, 
I've always known 
You'll go, 
You always go. 

I know, 
I've always known 
You'll go, 
You always go.


from Irrevery Volume I, released November 19, 2017 
Music and lyrics by Paige Johnson-Brown 

Tom Csatari (Guitar) 
Paige Johnson-Brown (Vox) 
Nick Jozwiak (Bass, background vox) 
Cameron Kapoor (Guitar) 
Mack Williamson (Drums) 

Illustration by Morgan Street

One Toned Chord

"Desert Song" 

While I keep on hoping, 
You build our love its casket 
And if I'm foolish enough to ask after it, 
Shield your eyes from this box of pine 
And sing me, 
Tender, tender, 
"Everything, everything 
Is gonna be just fine." 

Well your love may be warm 
But it's a dry, dry heat 
And to garner just a drop from it's 
A world-renowned feat, 
And I'm just your blazing sun's 
Canon fodder 
But I'm a desert girl 
And I dig for my water. 

And I wouldn't want it any other way 
So if I beg and I pray, 
Ignore what I say, 
Don't open the door, 
I don't want to see it, 
It's too fucking late 
For an easy exit. 

Tie me up with string 
And fucking pump me full of lead, 
I've got a shotgun for a mouth 
And a bullet for a head. 
Well maybe it would all be better off If I were just dead... 
Ah but God's as cruel as you are 
He decides when it's the end. 

And I wouldn't want it any other way 
So if I beg and I pray, 
Ignore what I say, 

Don't open the door 
I don't want to see it 
It's too fucking late 
For an easy exit. 
It's too fucking late for my heart 
It's too fucking late for my heart 
It's too fucking late for my heart 
It's too fucking late for my heart


from Irrevery Volume I, released November 19, 2017 
Music and lyrics by Paige Johnson-Brown 

Tom Csatari (Guitar) 
Paige Johnson-Brown (Vox) 
Nick Jozwiak (Bass, background vox) 
Cameron Kapoor (Guitar) 
Mack Williamson (Drums) 

Illustration by Charles George Esperanza

Desert Song

"Just Like Me" 

You are the dog on the rope 
That I keep tied up, howling, hoping 
For another chance 
To prove he should run free 
You are the stem in the bouquet 
That I've been letting decay for days 
You've got that stench of death upon you 
But I keep you around anyway 

Because you're just like me 
How could you not be 
When you're just a manifestation 
Of my self-loathing 

You read just like a book 
And I must work to unhook 
Myself from your representation Of reality 
You are the shoe that hits the floor 
You are beaten, you are worn 
You've played a part, fulfilled a role 
It's written all over your soul 

And I know 
I know how it goes 
Intimately 
I know 
I know how it goes 
Intimately 

Because you're just like me 
How could you not be 
When you're just a manifestation 
Of my self-loathing 
You are a fist full of mud 
Sit in my palm, beg to be slung 
You have always brought the worst 
Out in me 
You are the eye of the needle 
That I wrestle with 
And feebly cry out, 
"WELL I WAS TRYING TO THREAD A SINGLE STRING!" 

I know 
I know how it goes 
Intimately 
I know 
I know how it goes 
Intimately 

Because you're just like me 
How could you not be 
When you're just a manifestation 
Of my self-loathing


from Irrevery Volume I, released November 19, 2017 
Music and lyrics by Paige Johnson-Brown 

Tom Csatari (Guitar) 
Paige Johnson-Brown (Vox) 
Nick Jozwiak (Bass, background vox) 
Cameron Kapoor (Guitar) 
Mack Williamson (Drums) 

Illustration by Meghan Forbes

Just Like Me

"Anatomy" 

Easy heart, 
easy heart 

When will you learn 
it's just not your turn? 

Wicked skin, 
wicked skin 

Act as a charmer 
but never as armor. 

Crooked finger, 
crooked finger 

How can one little beckoner 
leave me to reckon with 
all of the falderal from 
those who call out in return? 

When will you learn 
that you beg to get burned? 

My burning churning circuitry 
is pumping red hot misery... 

My body does not belong to me 
I'm a subject of the tyranny 
of my anatomy. 

Foolish hands, 
foolish hands 

What do you reach for? 
There's no one to reach for.


from Irrevery Volume I, released November 19, 2017 
Music and lyrics by Paige Johnson-Brown 

Tom Csatari (Guitar) 
Paige Johnson-Brown (Vox) 
Nick Jozwiak (Bass, background vox) 
Cameron Kapoor (Guitar) 
Mack Williamson (Drums) 

Illustration by Chelsey Pettyjohn

Anatomy

"Softly Hissing" 

These days I slip away so easy easily 
Though I fall fall fast 
I’m jolted from my sleep 

Raise the curtains, shine the lights, 
Tell the morning that you love it just as much as you love the night 

But it’s the same damn lies from previous previously 
That same fire that haunts me, that old devil deviously 

Blasts the glass out from the windows 
And lets the wind come rushing in 

Kills the heat 
Kills the heat 
Kills the heat 

So I am reaching out for something I need 
And though I lift my hands deliberately, 

There’s a force that pushes back at me, 
Hissing, 

“What a fool 
What a fool 
What a fool. 

What a fool 
What a fool 
What a fool 
To fight it.” 

Ah it must be time to flee the flee the scene 
Started dropping bombs, now I’m my own damn refugee 

As if I could ever escape 
Ever escape 
Ever escape 
From me 

So I am looking to undo some deeds 
And though I guide towards light deliberately 

There’s a poison that’s released in me 
Hissing, 

“What a fool 
What a fool 
What a fool 
What a fool 
What a fool 
To fight it.”


from Irrevery Volume I, released November 19, 2017 
Music and lyrics by Paige Johnson-Brown 

Tom Csatari (Guitar) 
Paige Johnson-Brown (Vox) 
Nick Jozwiak (Bass, background vox) 
Cameron Kapoor (Guitar) 
Mack Williamson (Drums) 

Illustration by Cecile Salvant

Softly Hissing

"Take Your Anger Out On Me" 

I'm as plush 
As a punching bag 

As giving 
As a tree 

My tongue is just a white flag 
waving in the wind 

And my lips are just targets 
begging begging 

Please please please 
Take your anger out on me 

I can take it like a catcher's mitt 
And bounce back like a spring 

I know you're not worrying but just in case you're worrying there's no need to worry because I can't feel a motherfucking thing 

So please please please 
Take your anger out on me 

What am I your bottle, your bottle of rye? 
Mean to be pounded and left out to dry? 

My hell, my hell is just one more damn guy saying, 
"Baby you look fucking good when you cry." 
"Baby you look fucking good when you cry." 

Ah but now come on 
Really there's no need no need no need to apologize 

Or to try and make it look good, camouflage, dress it up, or disguise it

It's as blatant as blatant can be 
Even the blind eye you're turning can see 
That I'm begging you begging you 

Please please please 
Take your anger out on me 

Hey hey hey! 
It's OK! 

Hey hey hey! 
It's OK! 

Hey hey hey! 
It's OK! 

Because everybody gets a little angry sometimes 
Everybody gets the short end of the stick 

But your pain your pain is so special 
I think I know just the trick 

Please please please 
Take your anger out on me


from Irrevery Volume I, released November 19, 2017 
Music and lyrics by Paige Johnson-Brown 

Tom Csatari (Guitar) 
Paige Johnson-Brown (Vox) 
Nick Jozwiak (Bass, background vox) 
Cameron Kapoor (Guitar) 
Mack Williamson (Drums) 

Illustration by Grace Lang

Take Your Anger Out On Me

Take Your Anger (Out On Me)

We make music - punk-country-noise. We make books. We make films.