𝚂𝚊𝚍𝚐𝚊𝚗𝚐

♥ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3S_9GxjF0cM ♥

https://velvetqueen.bandcamp.com/track/let-me-die 

prod. https://soundcloud.com/nbnt
prod. https://soundcloud.com/harvest

[lyrics]
if everything's goin right
then why does it feel so wrong
i think i'm scared of the light
i think i'm scared to go on

i need some opiates now
i need some sadness to drown me
i'm not good at bein happy
i'm only good at bein lonely

these feelings, they don't feel like me
i'm distant from who i used to be
i'm glad that i changed, i am
but i dont think i'll stay as i am

i don't want love i want drugs
i don't want love i want drugs

stop fuckin bein so nice
i don't deserve this 
please let me just die

i don't want love i want drugs
i don't want love i want drugs...

Let Me Die (prod. nobloodnotears & harvest)[video link in description]

whatever (prod. Haruhi)

from the start (prod. ʎpoqou)

Prod: @d_e_a_t_h
Sample from @man_huh
Art: @sleepyboyhomeless
_____________________________
LYRICS
[HOOK]
I got a problem
I don't even know if I can solve it 
Sleepin through the weekend 
Passing out unconscious 
Pop it then I'm off it 
On another planet 
Take me from reality coz 
I can barely stand it 

[VERSE]
Fire pits and ash trays, feelings of inadequacy 
Burn up all the furniture coz none of that shit mattered to me 
None of that shit matters in the end
When you're living in the moment you don't think about regret 

You don't think of consequences when your life's a fucking pity party. 
I could pick apart the fucking fact I had a shitty heart
Shitty start to life, a broken family with a shitty car
I guess you took my mind off all my problems

I would sit and talk, and turn the minutes into hours 
You'd just sit and smile at me like all we had was time 
I regret the fact I never understood the concept 
Wish I had your picture coz you're fading from my mind. 

Look at what this pain can do to us(x2)

[HOOK](x2)
I got a problem
I don't even know if I can solve it 
Sleepin through the weekend 
Passing out unconscious 
Pop it then I'm off it 
On another planet 
Take me from reality coz 
I can barely stand it

Look at what this pain can do to us

IN LOVING MEMORY

COPING MECHANISMS

coping mechanisms (Prod. lildeath)

Lil Intro Vert

prod @notmorgn

listen on youtube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gd_Xqqx_St8

whats wrong or whats right
im bouta take a flight like should i say goodbye 
fuck that imma hold onto my pride
momma raised a soldier so i can't afford to cry
lookin back i see the knife in my back now
lookin at life wishing i was in the background 
lookin back i see my future in the past now
90 in the whip like should i crash now

im so sick of this im so sick of shit nobody listening 
demons all around diamonds wet just like a christening 
wait why you always high when you call me
why'd u ask what's wrong when you saw me (X2)

chemicals running through my veins i just wanna sleep 
feelings bleeding out my brain but right now i can't feel a thing 
woke up late time to waste away
my favorite days are the rainy days
let it soak in then i throw it all away
i try my best but this feeling always stays
you know i try but you gotta gimme space
and i dont wanna hurt you if you get in my way

(hook)

reach out just to waste my time
its the young waste of space 
with his headphones on
call me when you need me baby
but i know im the last resort
you said that you love me
how the fuck could you just love a ghost
you said that you love me baby
i said we are not that close

(hook)

reach out just to waste my time
its the young waste of space 
with his headphones on
call me when you need me baby
but i know im the last resort
you said that you love me
how the fuck could you just love a ghost
you said that you love me baby
i said we are not that close

im so sick of this

lyrics:

ive got too much to die for
3am and my eyes sore
i think i smoked more
then i was good for

she says that she loves me
layed out naked in the pine leaves
she said baby its cold out
but ive got my own heat

please can u hold me
these memories haunt me
so please can just control me
and pretend u love me

i need it so bad
i hope that u know that
these scars dig in so deep
my mind was never one to hold back

all u left was ur coat 
i could float on my words if i chose
i could choke on the do and the donts
i fix everything i had wronged
but ud pick it apart and just tell me i should go

tell me i should go
rum is in ur coke
i could see the bag that u were using for the blow
i dont fuck with them
but i guess i fuck with u
so if u want me to go i guess that thats what imma do

u tell me im lost 
but i fell in love with u
im really only lost
cause i know im losing u
great ok thats cool
guess its bye from the door
id say text me when ur home but i never hear from u

please can u hold me
these memories haunt me
so please can just control me
and pretend u love me

i need it so bad
i hope that u know that
these scars dig in so deep
my mind was never one to hold back

luv me (prod. kryptik)

prod. https://soundcloud.com/d_e_a_t_h

co prod. Mix andMaster by https://soundcloud.com/delipres

Artwork: https://www.facebook.com/dougkeating92/?ref=br_rs

never sober

i just hope this one does better than the last... if not, oh well i guess. 
100 plays and downloads are enabled.

thats all im gonna type this time i guess...

waiting on the heartbreak again (prod. ryan bevolo)

produced by @notmorgn

@guccihighwaters

lyrics:

(guccihighwaters)

where my friends?
all i see is ghosts with drug addictions
im floating well but i will sink with this affliction

and that night they found u dead right in the kitchen the sharp needle pushed like a piston

come feel come feel

(9TAILS)

come feel the beat of my heart
is it fast and should i be scared
bitch i been falling apart

ur friend hit a rough patch
bitch i BEEN falling apart
i could teach em how to deal with that
i could show em where to start

it really isnt that hard
put the work raise the bar
i treat the game like a football
kick that shit all 53 yards

catch up to me thats a trek
far trek no picard
u aint really been thru enough
take a look at these scars

im falling
through the cracks
back breaking
under the pressure u had put up on my back

love bites purple onto my neck
with no love its boring
wish i could feel something

(guccihighwaters)

i wish i could
i wish i could
i wish i could
just a fragment of my heart
is all that u left me
how many times
cus girl i been stressin

no friends just vices around me
they only help me block out my surroundings
19 but my heart is in fragments
now every night i just sleep in the casket

(9TAILS & guccihighwaters)

im falling
through the cracks
back breaking
under the pressure u had put up on my back

love bites purple onto my neck
with no love its boring
wish i could feel something

9TAILS & guccihighwaters - scars (prod. notmorgn)

produced by nicholas allan found at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UChXjXO9F6i4O8fnrQc1lpzA/about

lyrics:

mouth like guns
lately all it do is blow smoke
ill never find new love
if im chasing the one from before
fuckings not fun
when it doesnt feel like before
got me checking every newsfeed
as soon as i walk in my door

cold like numb
had to wipe the pictures from my phone
swept up moved on
but i feel her touch to my bones
if i ever blow up
will i see your name on my phone
promise i would never judge you baby
how the fuck could i judge home

watching the process of falling
in love with a person other than me
i dont think i can handle this
but ill unconditionally
love you, even if its not me,
with you, even if you hate me,
i just wanna see you happy
thats been helping me breathe
baby

come back and grind your body on mine
we kiss we hitting our teeth
bit lips until they would bleed
we'd strip and take off the sheets
lights on she said she wanna see love making
youll come round eventually
you can be as late as you please
they can build my grave with two seats
baby

mouth like guns
lately all it do is blow smoke
ill never find new love
if im chasing the one from before
fuckings not fun
when it doesnt feel like before
got me checking every newsfeed
as soon as i walk in my door

cold like numb
had to wipe the pictures from my phone
swept up moved on
but i feel her touch to my bones
if i ever blow up
will i see your name on my phone
promise i would never judge you baby
how the fuck could i judge home

my home (prod. nicholas allan)

FEAT. DIVINE WRATH. 
Follow him: https://soundcloud.com/divine_wrath
OFFICIAL MUSIC VIDEO : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=29uTl8uS-ik

why do i try? (cry)

produced by ocean beats found at www.youtube.com/channel/UCpipAjo9fIhDMXOoo0Mm86Q

lyrics:

come thru with a quarter ounce talkin bout go until its done
fun
girl you perfect if u leave can you tell me who the fuck im gonna love
none
swear to god i went and met someone
got a bad bitch but she start shit for fun
girl its not fucking fun
picking up the pieces
tell me do u need me
do u wanna see me
do u want a sweater you could keep it when u leave me
i cant
keep it together 
this cold winter weather
has tricked me to feeling a way
i got nothing else left to say to you
forget my embrace

you could sleep at night
youll be alright
but i tore you open inside
bring raw emotion to life
he doesnt have what i have inside
and i know you know that i could treat u right
make u feel right
evanesence girl ill bring you to life

come thru with a quarter ounce talkin bout go until its done
fun
girl you perfect if u leave can you tell me who the fuck im gonna love
none
swear to god i went and met someone
got a bad bitch but she start shit for fun
girl its not fucking fun
picking up the pieces

come thru with a quarter ounce talkin bout go until its done
fun
girl you perfect if u leave can you tell me who the fuck im gonna love
none
swear to god i went and met someone
got a bad bitch but she start shit for fun
girl its not fucking fun
picking up the pieces
tell me do u need me
do u wanna see me
do u want a sweater you could keep it when u leave me
i cant

dnt leave me (prod. ocean)

produced, mixed & mastered by @notmorgn
guitar by: @caspr

i feel like shit again
like shit again
my words burn like they sizzling
i can’t take notes i’m scribbling
i ball with bands you dribble
flow so cold it can’t ripple
i got the the slight of hand
flying like im peter pan
waste entire days
can’t find purpose anyway
can’t find shit I’m in a haze
40 oz right to my face
i’m isolated
why they think they famous?
blame it on the numbers
sometimes i can’t take it

you’re like a blast from the past
i’m so temporary baby
feel like this is dying fast
so temporary
i’m so temporary

off that shit again
off that gin again
till i can’t pour it up
till i can’t see my cup
is it fun to treat me like a dub
to treat me like shit
treat me like another one
and what’s the point in love
when you can’t feel a thing?
can’t feel a thing
baby i can’t feel my face
and what’s the point in love
when you can’t feel a thing?
can’t feel a thing
baby i can’t feel my face

you’re like a blast from the past
i’m so temporary baby
feel like this is dying fast
so temporary
i’m so temporary

you’re like a blast from the past
i’m so temporary baby
feel like this is dying fast
so temporary
i’m so temporary

so temporary

take it day by day.
wanted 2 make a song w/o a kick lol
special thank you to @deltasleep

follow @killedmyself -
instagram.com/killdmyself
twitter.com/yngkms

follow @nohidea
instagram.com/noh1dea
twitter.com/nohidea_

givinguponme.com

artwork by Nohidea

and then, it swallowed me [w. killedmyself] (feat. delta sleep)

@prodreaper

lyrics:
i hope it hurts
i hope you learn
gazing at bridges that you burned
i wish i knew the first time 
i wish i knew the first time 
you were my mentor
you were my friend
now when i see you it burns 
now when i see you it burns inside

my head is fucked i've had enough
because of you now i can't trust
i am scared to show my love

i hope it hurts
i hope you learn
gazing at bridges that you burned
i wish i knew the first time 
i wish i knew the first time

you were my mentor
you were my friend
now when i see you it burns 
now when i see you it burns inside

and hate is all i give to you
holding secrets i never knew 
do what you gotta do 
but i can't show my love to you

i hope it hurts (prod. reaper)

guitar by : @waitingoncisco

lyrics:

i could be fake too
just not how i make do
it's not that i hate you 
well i don't know
hard to be great you know 
it's hard to be grateful
it's hard to be thankful
so i don't show
you know we all hurt it's just life
baby i get lost in the midnight
we all got problems i just admit mine
at night my eyes wont close

if i'm a star i'm burnt out and looking down
just cause she love me right now
don't mean she'll always be around
always stoned and in my house 
don't got nobody i can count on 
just stay tucked off by myself
oh i 
only get in my zone when i get on my own
all alone
she hit me up at all
and i shut off my phone
i go ghost
i swear she got those words you feel in your bones
who would have known
the prettiest face would have the ugliest soul

yeah but im a loverboy what'd you expect from me
i swear pretty girls will be the death of me
step to me i'm in the sky
baby i been hearing lies 
all my fucking life
so i always treat them nice
so when they fuck me over i don't even think twice
i just cut em off i don't even want a slice
imma leave her blocked
wish my heart weren't so soft 
wish you weren't my first fuck
all the shit is so dumb

now i just find safety in how 
these memories start all fading
put a knife inside my back
then ask why i'm so filled with hatred

anything but give you space and i'd rather erase myself
put the hurt of my back
chasing feeling's never helps

i could be fake too
just not how i make do
it's not that i hate you, 
well i don't know
hard to be great you know 
it's hard to be grateful
it's hard to be thankful
so i don't show
you know we all hurt it's just life
baby i get lost in the midnight
we all got problems i just admit mine
at night my eyes wont close

ghostboy. (with waitingoncisco)

Don't let me give it one more try...

Prod. @m-i-s-e-r-y
Mixed and Mastered by @iamhrtbrk
Cover Art by Kai

Kai's Tweet Spot - https://twitter.com/KaiJuiced

i dont wanna die (prod. misery)

Forever in my mind
Always search
But cannot find
Was looking for your love
But you just left me behind

I feel very numb
Cause my soul already died
I feel very dumb
Cause now I know she lied
Look up at the sky
And I ask the gods why
Walking all alone
Need nobody by my side
Put me in my grave
I been thinking every night
Would it be that bad
If I left it all behind

Tired of my life
Always cry
And get in fights
I know I'm no good
Cut my skin up with the knife
Kissed me on my lips
And turned my heart just like the ice
I am not okay

I am not alright
I am not alright
I am not alright
I am not alright

Forever in my mind
Always search
But cannot find
Was looking for your love
But you just left me behind

Forever in my mind
Always search
But cannot find
Was looking for your love
But you just left me behind

Fall in love you lose your life
On the acid
See the lights
On the stage
I'm super high
Blacking in and fucking out
All these people used to doubt
Act like they don't fucking dream
So much fake up in this scene

It's fuckin toxic
I'm barely breathing
But I'm flexin and I'm flossin
And they fucking think their stunting
It's fucking nothing
Their music sounds disgusting
In a race but I'm cheating
Yeah I'm taking drugs
To run away from demons
Don't know who you are
Talking all that nonsense
Pull up leave you bleeding
Your head looking like a faucet
Cause it's dripping
Give me any beat you know I ain't missing
Tell that girl I'm on a mission
I don't want love
I hate the attention

I hate the attention

spotify

forever in my mind (prod. xtravulous)

Watch the official music video for ''Scars'' here: https://youtu.be/PDU7GtVDdMU

Lyrics:
I'll be the stitches to your scars babe
just hold me, just hold me

Listen on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/album/2inr5VcY2xxV9UqMAbVZdV

iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/scars-feat-mishaal-single/1387708918

Thank you for 500k plays on soundcloud 💕

Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ondi.vil/
Follow Mishaal <3
https://soundcloud.com/mishaal_tamer

𝚂𝚊𝚍𝚐𝚊𝚗𝚐

𝖇𝖆𝖘𝖎𝖈_𝖌𝖎𝖗𝖑