I was fascinated by the world
She was fascinated by my curls
I was dumb and only 18
Now a decade ago she was a teen
Said I’d succeed
Could’t afford to fail
Was earning minimum wage
Couldn’t afford to fail
Don’t be blinded by my age
Cuz comparison is a jail
And even if I fail
at least I set sail
Living on my own, edge of being grown
Trying to build an empire, forgot about the throne
young and already had a fair share of thrills
Imagine being 17, worrying bout bills

Now the only thing that keeps me sane is knowing everyone else is just the same

Not the violence of the bad
but the silence of the good
That makes everybody think
the world is misunderstood
That’s what she would mention whenever we would meet
My daily decision was should I work or should I eat 
And now I’d rather sound conceited
as long as I don’t sound defeated
If you knew the way I’ve been treated
If you knew the ways I’ve been greeted
You would think I’ d be depleted

Now the only thing that keeps me sane is knowing everyone else is just the same

She said to me use your heart less
Took it too far, became heartless
When I had no time, money was worthless
And without it feels time worth less
Should’ve known relationships wouldn’t last
What affects the present like the past
So come on honey let’s not pretend
This isn't just a cool story for your friends
Cups of tea, cured my anxiety
Felt I was flying free
Then I met society
Dying silently

Now the only thing that keeps me sane is knowing everyone else is just the same

The Same

https://ffm.to/diamond-in-the-rough

http://jayjohnson.co.uk

Diamond in the Rough

Preconceptions

Vague Vibes

Almond Eyes

http://jayjohnson.co.uk
http://ffm.to/recent-ruminations

Since I Left Home

How High?

Family

Wake up in the morning
Take a look at myself
Realise I’ve got no generational wealth
so I’m tryna get the music off my shelf
But working this much can’t be good for my health
Wake up in the morning
Take a look at myself
Realise I’ve got no generational wealth
You complained I’m always working I said darling it’s true
But what else is a working-class musician to do?

I said hello to the cello when I was about 8
Back then I was called Jerry and I could never relate
To anyone that was near me only the strings I would play
Let me know there was a reason to get up each day
13 when I found a guitar in the attic
Wasn’t easy at first, but I kept on going at it
Honestly I played so much, my fingers would bleed
Didn’t know back then I was planting a seed
Eventually the seed grew and next thing I knew
I was 15 with a pen and paper I flew
My music was never meant for public consumption
I just loved to write and play for me it was something
I could do on my own, without being judged
Friends said you should perform at first I wouldn’t budge



First time I stepped on stage with a guitar
Was at a little cafe I worked at back in south
The crowd said that they loved me and couldn’t believe it
They thought I just made good coffees and couldn’t conceive that
I was musically gifted, spirit had lifted
I was feeling elated, people related
So I decided I should share my music with the world
But I was only one guy and it was no use
Gotta get it all recorded, now I wanna be heard,
had to at least try to learn how to produce
17 when I started making music with screens
Cracked the logic to melodic ways of using machines
Since then I’ve been learning everyday
Still burning with desire to know every way
To make beats that make the ground shake
I also love making really chill soundscapes
Went to uni I was thinking it would do me some good
Working 4 jobs and I felt misunderstood
Hustling through nights and turning up to class sleeping
Avoiding debt, knew that was another glass ceiling
Anyway long story short I dropped out
Trying figure out what my life should be about
Homeless then dead was the path that I was fearing
Had to get a new skill, started sound engineering
19’s how old I might’ve been when I was told
It’s a steep learning curve more than just reverb
Sleeping on my mentor’s couch for half a year
Learning about the frequencies you want the people to hear
And about how I perceive sound with my own ears
My mentor was called Asier
And I wish he were here
21 years old as if too good to be true
started managing this live music venue
I would chill there with friends and I would chill there on my own
For me in the end it became a second home 
Eventually we had to close our doors
The news said apparently humanity’s at war
Can’t even lie I miss the partying and raving
For a few months managed to survive on my savings 
No more pouring penny
Searching for any penny
Never this is how I would end 2020

Working-Class Musician

If I wasn’t always polite all the time
I know I’d go back to a life of crime
When you take a look at me, you may not believe your eyes
There was never a need to project or categorise
I was told I was free but found decisions were made for me
Am I just an idle slave? Cried all of my tears wasn’t years before
I made tidal waves

Music is the medication I make and take for myself,
You can have some too, listen if it helps
Music is the medication I make and take for myself,
You can have some too, listen if it helps

Seen surprise in the eyes of everyone I meet,
Seen surprise in their eyes whenever I speak
It may seem like I don't care
But I'm just quietly sincere
Every second is second less to live
Creating and medicating my gift to give
Picked up a guitar cuz there was nothing to do
Except sit in a cage and imagine the view

Now my music is the medication I make and take for myself,
You can have some too, listen if it helps
Music is the medication I make and take for myself,
You can have some too, listen if it helps

Download/Stream

Medication

Musician, songwriter, and producer from South London
For full discography: http://jayjohnson.co.uk New music out soon.

Jay Johnson