cover of hard times by the infinitely talented ethel cain

dads, bro.

hard times (ethel cain cover) [rough] jan23

cover of sidelines by phoebe bridgers. me and mfing WHO?!!!!!

sidelines (phoebe bridgers cover) oct22

forever in that window w/ e.s.

lyrics:
the trains and cars drift on by
as planes swim through the fading sky
the city winks at us in the quiet night
an open promise of life and light

we could sit here for hours, slow it all down
lose ourselves in the dark and never be found

turner's somber voice gently sings
giving the jet air beneath its wings
figure our future and our plans
how one day we'll travel to faraway lands

we could sit here for hours, slow it all down
lose ourselves in the dark and never be found

numb to all but the sight and sound
watching the wheels of planes touch down
all these cities, all these towns
all these people just in the background
and so are we

turner (e's song) [original - rough mix] april23

revisiting a tune 15 y/o me wrote just for funsies 😈
thx for the n-couragement kdz 😁

lyrics:
i grew up a little too fast
yet i still can't figure this out
i don't want to be here
but i'm so scared to leave
what do you do
when you're so unhappy
with the world, with yourself
where do you go?

i try so hard to make a life
that is something worthwhile
but nothing is ever good enough
it's never good enough
i make promises to myself
then break them the next day
i vow to change my life
but i'm stuck in first gear

with no backbone
i can't take the next step
it's so hard to force it
when you don't know what you want

(there's a time for everything verse)

i can't go on like this
i can't go on like this
i can't go on like this
how can there be time for everything when it seems like everyday there's time for nothing?
(i can't, i can't, i can't go on)
there isn't time for anything

time revisited [original - rough mix] july23

i didn't think it would end up like this but. here we are
(this is extremely rough unmixed SRY its just an idea. but uh. WGASIDKGC 😈)

lyrics:
well i heard that your brother got married
in the church in the center of town
and i heard that your father got buried
in the graveyard where we used to mess around

he always thought that jesus could save us
do you think there’s still hope for us now?
cause i haven’t been sleeping
since the day that you skipped out

well it’s raining in michigan
so hard that i can’t see
if the road that i’m driving
is the same one you used to leave

fell asleep while my sister was driving
and woke up under halogen lights
i thought i was back in our kitchen
asking if you were alright

i’m still drinking and smoking and lying 
about where everything went wrong
you always said that if i let go of the past
i wouldn’t have to act so strong

well it’s snowing in michigan
and they’re saying the lake might freeze
and this road that i’m driving
won’t bring you back to me

elliott [original - rough unmixed idea] aug23

bringing back one from college

lyrics:
those long summer days in fields of hyacinth and rose
you kissed me for the first time and the sun went cold
we drifted as we listened to the warm august breeze
as gentle as the way you brought me to my knees

elio, oh elio
you never left my mind
i can’t sleep when
i think of your hand in mine
elio, oh elio
i wish you never left my side
i can’t breathe when
i think of that quiet night

our touches shrouded in the dark of my old room
your face is like an angel’s in the pale light of the moon
i can’t help but watch your fingers run along the pages
your words pulling me through these long lost ages

elio, oh elio
you never left my mind
i can’t sleep when
i think of your hand in mine
elio, oh elio
i wish you never left my side
i can’t breathe when
i think of that quiet night

and in this eternal summer of youth
mine is yours is yours is mine
and love is destined to be lost 
to circumstance and time

elio [original - rough] dec24

proverbs 17:17


lyrics:

for the most part i spend life on my own
even you have to go
you got another life waiting at home
don’t worry i’m used to being alone


 
i didn’t mean to call you crying
but i told you that lying 
to you is the one thing i can’t do
and you’re the only one who knew

i swear to god i’m trying
i don’t want to feel like i am dying
but life gets me down so far underground
that i can’t come back around



push down on the bruises just to feel
i need a reminder that i’m still real
i’m scared of the scars that will be left behind when my skin heals
i’m sorry i don’t know how i feel



i didn’t mean to call you crying
but i told you that lying 
to you is the one thing i can’t do
and you’re the only one who knew

i swear to god i’m trying
i don’t want to feel like i am dying
but life gets me down so far underground
that i can’t come back around



staring at the pills on my nightstand
lungs full of nicotine and a glass bottle in my hand
pick up my phone and put it down, can’t understand
why you pull me back up again and again



i didn’t mean to call you crying
but i told you that lying 
to you is the one thing i can’t do
and you’re the only one who knew

i swear to god i’m trying
i don’t want to feel like i am dying
but life gets me down so far underground
that i can’t come back around

no, i can’t come back around

gets me (down) [original - rough] dec24

quick track i laid down

lyrics:
i don’t want to love you anymore
playing it cool is getting hard and my ribs are getting sore
i don’t want to love you anymore
i’m tired of waiting for you to come around like a dog outside your door


i’ve traced the scars on your hands, you’ve traced the curve of my hips
your mouth has been on my skin, but has never touched my lips

you’d do anything for me but love me like i want you to
at least that’s what you don’t say but everyone sees the things you do


i don’t want to love you anymore
playing it cool is getting hard and my ribs are getting sore
i don’t want to love you anymore
i’m tired of waiting for you to come around like a dog outside your door


when you’re lying in bed, so tired you can’t sleep
and you let your mind wander, do you think of me?
because my pillow still smells like you, and i’m lying face down
pretending like every night i get to keep you around

you’d do anything for me but love me like i want you to
at least that’s what you don’t say but everyone sees the things you do


i don’t want to love you anymore
playing it cool is getting hard and my ribs are getting sore
i don’t want to love you anymore
i’m tired of waiting for you to come around like a dog outside your door


you know i need you like i need my lungs to breathe
and i know the way it kills you every time you have to leave
but i think you’re being kind of mean by not letting me find someone new
and it’s because deep down inside you need me to love you


but i don’t want to love you anymore
playing it cool is getting hard and my ribs are getting sore
i don’t want to love you anymore
i’m tired of waiting for you to come around like a dog outside your door

i don't want to love you anymore [original - rough mix] dec24

i love my mom

lyrics:
tell me mama am i everything you hoped id turn out to be?
i lost myself somewhere along the way but tell me did i make good on all your dreams?

and mama did all the hurting that he caused you finally become too much?
and did you realise no matter what you do it will never be enough?



tell me mama will it always hurt each and every time i leave?
does the pain of growing up and getting out ever start to ease?

and mama do i call enough, do i make you feel any less alone?
or do i wait too long to ask you how it feels to be on your own?



tell me mama how do you make it through this heavy life?
how do you carry the weight of it all inside?

and mama will we ever find any easier to breathe?
or will i be just like you and always have to be somebody someone needs?

mama [original] dec24

rerecorded this one

lyrics:
tell me you’re afraid i might hate you
but baby don’t worry, even when you hurt me
there’s no one i hate more than myself 
 
guess we’re both breaking promises tonight
trying to keep down the liquor, you tell me you miss her
and i’ve never felt sicker in my whole life

if i tell you this is the last time
will it somehow change your mind
cuz i can’t take one more night
lying awake while you sleep by my side

tell me that i’m stuck inside my head
that i need to be more direct, but baby last time i checked
just friends don’t end up sharing beds

guess we’re both a bit lonely tonight
trying to keep it together, but you say you know me better
and i can’t look you in the eye

if i tell you this is the last time
will it somehow change your mind
cuz i can’t take one more night
lying awake while you sleep by my side

tell me [original - rerecord] jan25

☀︎ welcome to my place to keep some stuff for my family & friends ☀︎

🐜 24 || 🇺🇸/🇬🇧 || wgasidkgc 😈

☀︎ jd.n ☀︎

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