Sh*tposting

Welp, this is my entry for the Disneycore Collab. 

Isle de Los Caballeros

yay (i feel like this was already done...)

Jack Likes To Party

i also worked on some flocka chords at the end

Do You Wanna Build a Flocka?

a-ha hits the right note

The "01" in the title can mean either "WIP" or "I have no clue how to do the rest of the song with this source"

beach circulation 01

How is this account still getting plays, likes, and reposts?

Through The Patricks And Stars

you're a squid now

Ghost: α

forgot to upload this for people who didn't want to download the gangnamcore 2 album
(https://triple-q.bandcamp.com/album/gangnamcore-2-part-i-no-stopping and https://triple-q.bandcamp.com/album/gangnamcore-2-part-ii-only-opping (i was in part 2))

The #1 Song In Bikini Oppam (Gangnam Zoo)

don't believe me? just watch

Cock and ball torture (CBT) is a sexual activity involving torture of the male genitals. This may involve directly painful activities, such as wax play, genital spanking, squeezing, ball-busting, genital flogging, urethral play, tickle torture, erotic electrostimulation or even kicking.

The recipient of such activities may receive direct physical pleasure via masochism, or emotional pleasure through knowledge that the play is pleasing to a sadistic dominant.

The practice carries significant health risks.

"Ballbusting" is a form of CBT in which a man has his testicles kicked, kneed, punched or squeezed. In addition to its occasional role in BDSM pornography, Tamakeri (玉蹴り) (lit. ball kicking) is a separate genre in Japan. Like many of the other activities is this article, it carries significant health risks.

A ball stretcher is a sex toy that is used to elongate the scrotum and provide a feeling of weight pulling the testicles away from the body. Intended to make one's testicles permanently hang much lower than before, this sex toy can be potentially harmful to the male genitals as the circulation of blood can be easily cut off if over-tightened.

While leather stretchers are most common, other models consist of an assortment of steel rings that fastens with screws, causing additional but only mildly uncomfortable weight to the wearer's testicles. The length of the stretcher may vary from 1-4 inches, and the steel models can weigh as much as five pounds. A more dangerous type of ball stretcher can be home-made simply by wrapping rope or string around one's scrotum until it is eventually stretched to the desired length.

A ball crusher is a device made from either metal or often clear acrylic that squeezes the testicles slowly by turning a nut or screw. How tight it is clamped depends on the pain tolerance of the person it is used on. A ball crusher is often combined with bondage, either with a partner or by oneself.

A parachute is a small collar, usually made from leather, which fastens around the scrotum, and from which weights can be hung. It is conical in shape, with three or four short chains hanging beneath, to which weights can be attached.

Used as part of cock and ball torture within a BDSM relationship, the parachute provides a constant drag, and a squeezing effect on the testicles. Moderate weights of 3–5 kg can be suspended, especially during bondage, though occasionally much heavier weights are used. Smaller weights can be used when the male wearing it is free to move; the swinging effect of the weight can restrict sudden movements, as well as providing a visual stimulus for the dominant partner

A humbler is a BDSM physical restraint device used to restrict the movement of a submissive male participant in a BDSM scene.

The humbler consists of a testicle cuff device that clamps around the base of the scrotum, mounted in the centre of a bar that passes behind the thighs at the base of the buttocks. This forces the wearer to keep his legs folded forward, as any attempt to straighten the legs even slightly pulls hard on the scrotum, causing considerable discomfort.

A testicle cuff is a ring-shaped device around the scrotum between the body and the testicles which when closed does not allow the testicles to slide through it. A common type has two connected cuffs, one around the scrotum and the other around the base of the penis. They are just one of many devises to restrain the male genitalia. A standard padlock may also be locked around the scrotum; without the key it cannot be removed.

Some passive men enjoy the feeling of being 'owned', while dominant individuals enjoy the sense of 'owning' their partners. Requiring such a man wear testicle cuffs symbolizes that his sexual organs belong to his partner, who may be either male or female. There is a level of humiliation involved, by which they find sexual arousal. The cuffs may even form part of a sexual fetish of the wearer or his partner.

Bishi Boi - "Zelda Is The Girl" [ELECTRO HOUSE] Out Soon On The Waifu Collective

I have finals tomorrow yet here I am making shitty memes (I passed)

Update:

YEEZY YEEZY YEEZY YEEZY YEEZY YEEZY YE

Back At It Again With the White Sans

fresh off the presses here is another spongebob shitpost

i actually put time into this god what am i doing 

_________________________________________
I just noticed the all star part was missing the bass 
so i re-uploaded it here: http://picosong.com/BATk/


My friend requested this

My typical process:

"ugh I can't get [THING 1] out of my head"
"ugh I also can't get [THING 2] out of my head"

then I combine them

the en

Curcurcurcurcurneria

The original, unedited audio track. Warning: it's explicit, and very loud.

Loudest Ever (unedited)

kinda inspired by How2BEpic and also inspired by a dream I had about donald glover being really racist

Despite having the video removed and losing half a million views on youtube due to "hate speech" I am still very thrilled to have the privilege of gaining many new listeners on soundcloud. Out of youtube and soundcloud, soundcloud has been the most fun for me this past year and I'm proud of the 3.5k friends/fans on this website I have made along the way. I hope to deliver more delicious trash to heckle your kekle. Thank you.

Gambino Goes Full Racist

Like my fake ads? Try my HOUR AND A HALF of fake talk radio and ads, produced for the game Postal 4! Starring a big collection of talented voice actors! | https://soundcloud.com/captaincomedy/kdtf-radio-comedy-station-from-postal-4

remember when the pinhead CEO of pepsico said this stupid shit about doritos during an interview?

"(Women) don't like to crunch too loudly in public. And they don't lick their fingers generously and they don't like to pour the little broken pieces and the flavor into their mouth."

"We are looking at (Doritos for women) ... low-crunch, the full taste profile, not have so much of the flavor stick on the fingers, and how can you put it in a purse? Because women love to carry a snack in their purse."

[https://www.nytimes.com/2018/02/06/business/lady-doritos-indra-nooyi.html]


well here is some speculative ad work i did for pepsico. now someone hire me for real VO work please. thanks, bye

twitter ver: https://twitter.com/captaincomedy/status/975832199097470977

music from youtube audio library: https://www.youtube.com/audiolibrary/music

silent partner - drop and roll
silent partner - marvin's dance
silent partner - sun spots
jingle punks - orange blanket
jingle punks - killing with kindness

Sh*tposting

JoeyBoy