Foxtrot

shout out gwen stefani

lurrrics:
I could run away and never tell my fears
maybe some day, I won’t wanna disappear 
I can’t keep my head clear …
we could run away and never tell our fears
maybe some day, we won’t wanna disappear 
I can’t keep my head clear 
(too much clutter) 

voice in my head
keeping him close, I
been isolated, who
gon tell me how to cope, uh
idiotic doesn’t know, uh
shocker shocker, eyes low uh
…If I go insane, it won’t go in vain
self-medicated, off the novacane
please keep me under as I sit and wonder.. under the
stars the same routine
I’m making my 
art
and making believe, I
spin, I spend, I cook and clean
all in 
attempt to know what it means, but

Loving and living is free
except for the food that’s a dollar or 3
That and the lease
now you want peace?
not in the least, you heard it from me

Sipping my
tea
Looking at skies
loosen yo tie, do some tai chi
wish I was fine, but I would be lying, I
do this for nieces and family tree

…artist type I can’t verbalize I just
stutter
…all my thoughts are just like my room, full of
clutter

, life is just waiting till summer,
life is just loving and suffering seeing what
we can discover, an angel in some and a beast in another these
pallets of color are plenty for others, then
others get greedy and ask for another (so
fuck it I’m done)

… where do you hide? (hide)
… where do you run? (run)

… where do I find my conclusions?
… not in learning institutions
… not myself I been a nuisance 
… not in others, too confusing
… what am I, doing?
… what am I, doing?
… what am I, doing?
… what am I?

(instrumental break)

I could run away and never tell my fears
maybe some day, I won’t wanna disappear 
I can’t keep my head clear …
we could run away and never tell our fears
maybe some day, we won’t wanna disappear 
I can’t keep my head clear 
(too much clutter)

Cluttter

did this for a school project.
shoutout frank.
may 2024 bring peace and ease.

prod. by me
mixed by me
piano by me

a frank ocean cover lol

prod. by me
mixed by me
written & recorded by me

R.I.P Jess <3

I'm a weirdo my dudes.
Good Enough?: COMING SOON

Lyrics:

Can’t think straight, like age of 8
I don’t need a cape cause my family ate
Couple of dates with a couple of mates
Pack and M-9 and i’m suddenly great
Empty of fate but can barely wait
cause new shoes came as I start to shake
Just can’t wait to finally relate,
to all of these people, that are actually bait
Great, Wait, but I can’t shout it
Then I look bad, Cause of simple sounds and
Tell my friends I’m not about it
Say, God Loves me, but I doubt it
Wow, theres no way around it
You just said it, Josh and now they’re shouting
Cleanse yourself with a youthful fountain
Climb to your grind like a couple of mountains
I’m in and I’m out and I never stop counting
in all of this money i’m practically drowning
and thats all they’re saying it sounds like they’re clowning
he’s huffing and puffing and howling, rebounding
and can’t take a minute to think of surroundings
Verse, verbs, pro-nouning
Mind power, take a pounding
they see the king, but they don’t see the crowning
I’m man but a shark, and I’m keeping a chart
still leaving some marks, and bending like arc
No playing like park, I’m all bite and no bark
I’m a shot in the dark, I’m a shot in the dark

(CHORUS)
I’m man but a shark, and I’m keeping a chart
still leaving some marks, and bending like arc
No playing like park, I’m all bite and no bark
I’m a shot in the dark, I’m a shot in the dark

(VERSE 2)

Spitting these verses, the kid is a curse and he’s
Hurting the ear’s of the youth and uncertainty
can’t even comprehend the common curtesy’
Killing the vibe, is murder on third degree
Kurt Cobain, like i’m blowing your brains
I’m back and I’m busting and boy is untamed 
and i’m hanging myself , like a picture in frame
Faking a fail, just for some fame

Whoa! you can’t even say it
politically correct like first name basis
put bass in the faces of kids in the nation
and hope that they learn, imagination
I’m facing the basis and making me shake
it’s so great and I can’t even stop HOL’ UP WAIT!
Bang, bang they wanna sang,
all of these verses like you was in gangs
Came, to, make me do
say all these things that you already knew
Bloods, Crips making you blue
Thugs, Bitches, something to do
Jump on the beat like my name kangaroo
You felt the heat when I came in the room
Slaying the fame and the game at it too
Praying for peace, making some news
Making it rain, and making a two
Making me say it, and I don’t want to
Honestly If I was being true
The truth would still be lying to you
I’m man but a shark, and I’m keeping a chart
still leaving some marks, and bending like arc
No playing like park, I’m all bite and no bark
I’m a shot in the dark, I’m a shot in the dark

(CHORUS)
I’m man but a shark, and I’m keeping a chart
still leaving some marks, and bending like arc
No playing like park, I’m all bite and no bark
I’m a shot in the dark, I’m a shot in the dark

Yeah… i guess I’m pretty crazy

Good Enough?

SHOT IN THE DARK

I just have a lot of feelings. This song talks about my feelings on subjects such as females, religion, my constant inner-struggle to be what others want out of me and abandoning what I want. Mostly the first two. 

I was listening to lots of lofi hip-hop radio stations.

I Feel Like Cameron

Exhaust

Absolute hell. I don't know if I've ever been lower than this. This was between a time of med changes because my mom didn't want me ending up like my father. This was between a midlife crisis that was so bad, that I broke up with my long time girlfriend temporarily, pushed every single friend I had away, had no interest in doing musical theatre or anything I enjoyed for that matter and was completely nihilistic in every way. I wasn't conscious for months. I was being dragged along and found no solace. Also this was the height of some severe stomach pains that came from also severe anxiety attacks I constantly had, which made me more angry and anxious, which caused more stomach pains. It was a loop. I literally couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, and wanted to disappear. Just go away for weeks, with no consequences. 

Something else interesting is that in that time I had only listened to 4 songs. 

Something In The Way - Nirvana 
And I Love Her - Kurt Cobain 
Grief - Earl Sweatshirt 
no, the moon - Teen Suicide (the sample for this song) 

They were four songs that I said to myself "If I were to kill myself... it would definitely be to one of these 4 songs." because they captured my feeling so well, and they were just songs that represented rock bottom for me. I was in hell. 

I AM better now.

moon

I had some weird, funny lyrics I couldn't let go to waste. This is also the reason my family probably thinks I'm a loser lmao

Hope It Sticks.

Just Another Rap Song

I almost threw up in front of my piano professor today lmao

As Of (Skit)

Punch old white people to this song. Idk. I just like having fun I guess

BARS & BASS

Honestly probably my favorite on the tape. Goes quite obnoxious, don't you think?

Joey is insane lmao

Josh, The Idiotic

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