* Hello there, child.
* Looks like I need to go around with the weedwhacker one more time, huh?
* I joke, I joke... My name is ASGORE.
* I live here in my NEW HOME.
* You're the first human I've seen down here in a long while...
* Come! You are safe as long as you stick with me.

4 - Fallen Down

[ the ruins encounters are swapped with some monster concept designs by toby and temmie that i especially liked ]

* MIMIKMI ATK 5 DEF 10
* There might be something inside...
* Hopefully a coin, key, or bomb!

* GALI ATK 8 DEF 4
* There's no spots on this sun!
* Wait, she's the moon one.

* LEO ATK 4 DEF 3
* Often gets confused with his brother, Lei.

* FRUIT PUNCH ATK 10 DEF 1
* Punches harder than he fruits.
* Or fruits harder than he punches?

* CRANIYUM ATK 8 DEF 5
* It loves to eat budding flowers.
* That stick you're holding looks yummy...

9 - Bustin'

* NORMIE - ATK 10 DEF 10
* On an eternal quest to find something interesting.

* ...Am I in your way?
* Oops. My fault.
* I'd step outta the way, but... don't feel like it, y'know?

10 - Battle Against a ...Normal Ghost

* ASGORE ATK 80 DEF 80
* Just wants the best for both of you.

14 - Through the Flowers and Flames

*old song title was "undyne (of the royal guard)", changed it because it didn't reflect her character as much as i wanted it to

16 - Once A Guardsman

UNDYNE: * Stop right there, PUNK!!!!
U: * You've slipped away enough times... and here's where it ends!
U: * ALPHYS! ROLL OUT THE TANK!!!!

[Alphys turns around, and a giant Temmie-shaped tank moves in from the right of the screen, just behind the rope bridge.]

U: * When I say one of MANY magic words, this puppy...
U: * Er... THING...
U: * Is gonna BLAST YOU AWAY!!!
U: * VERY FAR AWAY!!!! INTO THE SKY!!!!
U: * Uh, ...and then we'll come find you.
U: * And make sure you aren't, like... DEAD.

[The TEMTANK beeps, and a long barrel slowly emerges from its mouth.]

U: * You scared yet, kid?
U: * But do y'know what's scarier than blasting away?
U: * Or the act of BEING blasted away?
U: * The real scariest part is...
U: * I LIED!!!!! NGAHAHAHAAA!!!!
U: * TEMTANK!!!!!! ACTIVATE!!!!!

[The TEMTANK beeps again, its ears and tail open up revealing a lighter, a blender, and a bundle of TNT.]

U: * What, you think we're so BORING that this is just a simple fight?!!
U: * It's actually... a puzzle.
U: * You see, Alphys here added a self-destruction mechanism by my request.

ALPHYS: * (A-and against her better judgement.)

U: * If you safely defuse the tank without the mechanism going off, we'll let you through.
U: * If not... uh... something about blasting or being blasted away.
U: * And if you do nothing, I'll say one of the OTHER magic words.
U: * The one that'll make it expl--
U: * Er... uh, GO OFF.
U: * So. Whaddya say, Alphys? Should we get the ball rolling?

A: * U-Undyne, d-don't...!!!

[After hearing the word "ROLL", the TEMTANK beeps and slowly rolls onto the rope bridge, collapsing it. Undyne, Alphys, and the TEMTANK fall.]

> INTERACTING WITH THE LEDGE
* ...
* (You can still hear Undyne and Alphys..)

U: * DAMN IT. I... forgot that was one of the words.
U: * I'm just glad it didn't explode on it's way d...
A: * Wh- UNDYNE--!!!

[A sudden flash of orange and red comes from underneath where the bridge used to be.]

>INTERACTING AGAIN
* ...
* (They're heading up the hill.)
* (Best to find another way around the rope bridge.)

[EXTRA] TEMTANK

* You wanna know what to do here in super-duper Snowmelt?!
* Down the road's Cluster's Pastries! They're a pastry shop made by spiders, with spiders, FOR spiders!
* Library's got some old books if you wanna read up on some town history!
* I hear someone keeps checking out all the "How to Draw Dragons" books, though.
* We got an inn next door, and-- Oh! Have you seen those two girls running around??
* Yep, Alphys and Undyne! They used to work for the Queen, but quit because... well, I don't actually know!!!!
* Say hi to 'em for me, will ya? They keep buying my entire stock of Nice Cream for their "anime nights".

23 - Shop (Nice Mix)

* ...Listen up, PUNK.
* Ya know what's waiting for you, right?
* Ya know what's gonna happen if you keep going?
* ...
* I know there's no stopping you.
* But... ugh...
* I might have to try.
* I like you, kid. You're a riot.
* But make this easier for yourself. For both of us...
* ...

* .......

* Ngah...
* NGAAAHHH!!! STOP MAKING THAT FACE!!!!!
* You've done a lot of good, but I can't let you through.
* You're a human! You're DEAD MEAT down here.
* If you leave, the QUEEN is gonna take your SOUL.
* ...but you can't leave if I finish you off here.
* I've got my morals, but this is for the good of monsterkind.
* ...
* I left the Royal Guard because the idea of killing humans...
* It didn't... feel right.
* Look at me now, TORIEL.
* ......
* Now stand still and give me that SOUL.

24 - Always A Guardsman

25 - Dating Start!

30 - Papyrus

* (There's a life-sized statue of an anime robot.)
* (Tenderly caress its face?)
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀♥ OH YES⠀⠀⠀⠀NO IM OK
* (It feels rough, scratched with plier markings.)
* (If robots don't dream of electric love, they might now.)

[After walking away, the camera zooms into the robot with a sparkly sound. It flies into the sky and descends in front of the human, blocking the way out.]

* I understand, darling. I really do.
* I'd be in love with me too if I looked like this.
* MADLY so.
* My cubic, and frankly PLASTIC physique must have confused you, but I'm really a ghost.
* Us ghosts are meant to find a vessel to fuse with, giving us a physical form.
* But... nothing has felt right so far.
* Forever window shopping, but nowhere to put my money.
* Until NOW, that is.
* This body... seems just right.
* And I need you to help me out here.
* To fuse with a vessel, ghosts need to feel... a rush of emotions.
* Something that makes them feel like they ARE their body, and always have been.
* To be honest... DRAMA and BLOODSHED has always been my kind of thing...
* So I won't let you go past this dump until I'm fused!
* Give it your all, darling.
* Show me this body is who I was meant to be!!!

* HAPSTABOT ATK 40 DEF 999
* A ghost trying to find his Perfect Grade body.

36 - HAPSTABOT PRIME ~ MK I

OH, A HUMAN..? HOW
VERY,
VERY,
...
PECULIAR.

> Who are you
MY NAME IS DR. GASTER. I AM AN AUTHOR, SHOPKEEP, AND THE OCCASIONAL MONSTER-WATCHER.
I HAVE WRITTEN MANY BOOKS IN MY TIME.
HAVE YOU VISITED THE LIBRARY IN SNOWMELT? SOME OF MY WORKS HAVE BEEN PUBLISHED THERE.

> Who are you (NEW)
MY NOVELS ARE MOSTLY FICTION, THOUGH I OFTEN WRITE STUDIES PER REQUEST OF THE ROYAL GUARD.
I AM SURE THE ROYAL SCIENTIST HAS THE BULK OF MY EDUCATIONAL WORKS IN HIS LABORATORY.
...OR STUFFED UNDER HIS COUCH.

> That symbol
BEHIND ME?
THAT SIGIL IS KNOWN AS THE 'DELTA SWAP'.
MONSTERS BEFORE OUR TIME BELIEVED THERE WAS ANOTHER WORLD, PARALLEL TO OURS... JUST OUT OF OUR REACH.
SOME CRAFTED SHRINES AND TRIBUTES TO PLEASE A HIGHER BEING CAPABLE OF CREATING SUCH A CONNECTION.
SOME PRAYED TO THE SIGIL, WISHING THEIR SOULS WOULD TRAVEL TO A BETTER WORLD AFTER PERISHING.
SOME STILL BELIEVE IN THE SIGIL.
BUT ME? HA! I CANNOT SUBSCRIBE TO SUCH A THOUGHT.
IF I MUST FEED INTO ESCAPISM, A FOUNTAIN PEN AND SOME PARCHMENT WILL DO THE TRICK!

> Sans and Papyrus
THOSE BONE-HEADED BUFFOONS?
THEY ARE LIKE FAMILY TO ME.
I HAD FORMED A BOOK CLUB IN SNOWMELT. MANY CAME AND WENT, BUT THOSE TWO... THEY COULD NOT LEAVE!
SANS WOULD SELECT A BOOK FOR US TO READ, DISAPPEAR FOR A FEW DAYS, AND COME BACK WITH IT MEMORIZED FRONT TO BACK.
I ASKED,
HOW DO YOU READ SO QUICKLY?
AND HE WOULD RESPOND,
i only read when i'm bored.
HIS BROTHER WAS ONLY ON CHAPTER THREE!
THE BOOK CLUB DISBANDED SINCE, AND NOW HE ONLY VISITS FOR VIDEO GAME CHEAT CODE BOOKS AND MY FICTION NOVELS.

> Sans and Papyrus (NEW)
THE GREAT PAPYRUS, SUCH A CHARMER.
WHILE HIS BROTHER SCANNED BOOKS LIKE A MACHINE, HE WOULD CLAIM TO HAVE BEEN BUSY AFTER EVERY MEETING.
THOUGH, WE ALL KNEW HE ONLY WANTED TO READ TOGETHER WITH THE ENTIRE GROUP.
THE ONE THING HE NEVER SLACKED ON, THOUGH, WAS HIS ROYAL GUARDSMAN BAR EXAM.
THAT BOY STUDIED HARDER THAN HIS BROTHER... A ROYAL SCIENTIST! HA!
WHEN HE HAD PASSED, THE BOOK CLUB PUT TOGETHER A CELEBRATION. THE WHOLE TOWN WAS THERE!
COLORFUL STREAMERS, SPEARS AND BONES HANGING FROM THE WALLS, BOWLS OF OATMEAL...
A LOT OF BOWLS OF OATMEAL...
IT WAS A LOVELY TIME.
IF YOU SEE THOSE BOYS, PLEASE TELL THEM THEIR... "LIBRARY GRANDPA"... SAYS HELLO.

[EXTRA] SHOP (ANOTHER MIX)

* Hey KID. WE're the Tobys.
* and welcome... to Tobys Topia.
* "Toby's"? Who's Toby? We're the TOBYS  ok
* Thank's

43 - Tobys Topia

* welcome to the.... Tobys Topia Gift Shop.!

3G - tobys residue
1G - tobys residue (SUMMER SAIL)
20G - tobys residue (give me Mony)
4000G - Giant Golden Embroidered with Rhinestones Tobys Statue Armor Helmet
NOT FOR SALE - Legendary Artifact

44 - Shop (Tobys Mix)

HALT, HUMAN.
YOU'VE WALTZED AND WEAVED AND DIPPED AND DEAVED BETWEEN MY KNIGHTLY GRASP FOR FAR, FAR TOO LONG.
THIS IS THE PART WHERE YOU FINALLY GIVE IN, AND LET YOURSELF BE RELIEVED.
RELIEVED OF YOUR FREEDOM.
WHICH, IN TURN, WILL RELIEVE MONSTERKIND OF THEIR FREEDOM.
I'VE SEEN WHAT YOU'VE BEEN UP TO,
YOUR... KIND... ENDEAVORS.
IT MAKES ME SICK TO THINK SOMEONE AS CARING AND THOUGHTFUL AS YOU IS ROAMING AROUND OUT THERE,
PLAYING GAMES... BEFRIENDING MONSTERS...
...
HM.
NO MATTER, HUMAN!
SOON YOU WILL FACE THE QUEEN.
AND SOON, (UNLESS YOU DIE TO ME), YOU WILL BE SLAUGHTERED.
AND SHE WILL ABSORB THE SEVEN HUMAN SOULS AND CROSS THE BARRIER.
YOUR HUMAN SOUL BEING THE SEVENTH ONE, BY THE WAY.
WE HAVE SIX.
...
...HM...
ACTUALLY, BEFORE I KILL YOU BOMBASTICALLY WITH A BACKING TRACK OF FANFARE AND CELEBRATORY PARTY HORNS,
I SHOULD TELL YOU ABOUT YOUR KIND.
YOU SEE, MANY YEARS AGO, THERE WERE OTHER HUMANS... JUST LIKE YOU.
AND...
AND THEY...
...
NYAGH! WHAT AM I DOING?!
GIVING IN TO MANDATORY EXPOSITORY MONOLOGUING??
NO! I SHANT! THIS IS MY LIFE'S MISSION!
TO KILL THE SEVENTH HUMAN! AND SAVE MONSTERKIND!
I'LL GET RESPECT! RECOGNITION! THE WHOLE SHABANG!!!
YOU!
ODDLY KIND AND RESPECTABLE HUMAN!
YOU WILL DIE BY THE HANDS OF THE GREAT KNIGHT PAPYRUS.
YOUR GOOD DEEDS WILL NOT GO UNNOTICED, BUT YOUR SOUL WILL GO STRAIGHT TO THE HANDS OF OUR QUEEN.
NOW STEP UP.
LET'S SEE HOW YOU CAN HANDLE THE BEST OF THE BEST!
NYAGHAHA!!!

45 - NYAGHAHA!!

* PAPYRUS 10 ATK 3 DEF
* The Royal Guard's finest!
* ...According to himself.

46 - Royal Serving of Honor

* oh, hey.
* you caught me getting ready to watch my soaps.

[Sans walks over and sits on a couch in front of a large, black television.]

* you can join me if you want.
* i hear this episode's supposed to be a big one.
* been in the works for years.

* i just realized... i forgot to get a drink.
* could'ja grab me a soda from my fridge?
* feel free to take one for yourself.

[The human walks to his fridge, and grabs two sodas. Walking back to the couch, they notice the TV is turned on, revealing a camera following the human's every movement.]

* thanks.
* mmm. tangy.
* i don't usually get this flavor.
* i'm more of a tomato guy myself.

* ...
* huh.
* i thought this episode would be more...
* eventful?
* i saw some commercials for it,
* there was this evil, bloodthirsty cat...
* breaking into a science lab...
* looking for a human to kill.

* ...but all i'm seeing is some handsome devil chilling on a couch.
* so this gets a good review from me. at least an 8.

[A clanking sound is audible just offscreen.]

* huh? oh, that sound?
* it's probably my washing machine.

[Another clanking sound, slightly louder.]

* that one's my dryer.

[Three quick, clanking sounds, getting progressively louder, before the lights go out as a crash is heard.]

* and that one's my murderous killing machine.

48 - muscle memory

MADDIE: * Places, PLACES, PLACES, PEOPLE!!!!
M: * We gotta movie to make you FREAKS!!!
M: * ...Mew~!

[A group of monsters holding microphones, cameras, and studio equipment scramble around Sans's observatory. Maddie walks in front of the couch, facing Sans and the human.]

M: * Sans! Get up and move- hmm... Over there!
S: * aye, aye, cap'n.

[Sans gets up and walks to the side of the room, with two monsters quickly covering his face in makeup.]

M: * Sit right there, Sans, you'll look PERF in a moment.
S: * do i not already?

[Maddie stands in front of the human.]

M: * Okay, now you... in front of that camera right there!
M: * Ah! You look...! Hm!
M: * I'm... not sure if makeup can save you!
M: * Whatever. Establishing shot, boys! Get as much of this dump as you can!
M: * Filters on! Turn this place into a glittery pink garbage can!

[The lights dim, and the camera centers between Sans and the human.]

M: * ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT!!! THIS LOOKS GREAT!!!
M: * Sans! Camera's rolling ...now!
S: * ...ahem.

[The camera slowly zooms in with Sans's lines.]

S: * "the end of your journey is at hand."
S: * "you will determine the future of this world."
S: * "human, you will be judged for your every action."
S: * "but not until after this brand new mew mew studios commercial for their new movie."
S: * "(please stop talking after this part sans..."
S: * "...you keep making jokes and it's wasting our precious footage...)"
S: * i think you gotta send this last part back to the writer's room.

[The camera zooms back out.]

M: * SANS!!!
M: * COMEDIC RELIEF IS ONLY ALLOWED WHEN IT'S IN THE SCRIPT, OK??
M: * STUDIO GOONS!! WRAP IT UP AND HEAD BACK TO THE STUDIO!
M: * Anywho~...!
M: * You're new around these parts, right, human?
M: * Have you heard of my brand new MEWVIE...?
M: * It's all about you! Exciting, right?
M: * And I'd love for you to STAR, of course!
M: * But first, we run humans through our training process first.
M: * If you die while fighting me, we give your soul to the QUEEN.
M: * If you survive... we'll just take your soul anyway.
M: * D'sat sound okay with you, mew~?

49 - INT. OBSERVATORY - EVENING

* (His name?)
* (His name)
* (█████)
* (█████)
* (█████)
* (█████)
* 
* (█████)
* 
* (█████)
* (█████)
* (His name)
* 
* (█████)
* (His name)

mus_st_exp.ogg

* GALI ATK 25 DEF 18
* Wants a be part of a bigger bouquet.

* LEI ATK 20 DEF 26
* Often gets confused with his brother, Leo, apparently.

* PORTISKULLIS 27 ATK 30 DEF
* Burned that bridge as soon as it got there.

53 - Red Bustin’

* (Actors are trampling over each other, lights are swinging out of control...)
* (It fills you with hope.)
* (HP fully restored.)

54 - Mew Mew Studios

> Muffet
N: * Mew Mew's food truck vendor? What about her?
S: * Isn't she, like... losing her mind in there?
N: * Oh, right... Yeah, she's been really edgy recently.
N: * Working for Mew Mew can't be THAT bad, can it?
S: * I'd go insane too if someone was tellin' me what to do every 5 minutes.
N: * I do that!! I have to keep the chalk in a food container so you don't eat it all!
S: * If it's not food, then why's it in a food container?

> Muffet (NEW)
S: * I wouldn't complain if we ran in and got some grub.
N: * All she sells is gross hot dogs, Suzy...
S: * Reminds me... didn'tcha hear she wants to open a bakery in Snowmelt?
S: * Mew Mew won't let her talk about it,
S: * says "it promotes competition."
N: * I'm sure literally ANYTHING is better than what's being sold in there.
N: * A bakery would be nice... I couldn't live without sweets.
S: * YOURS, maybe. Those greasy hot dogs could fuel me FOREVER.
N: * Fahaha, you'd turn into a hot dog before we're free...!

> About your wares
S: * We got it from the dump.
N: * Y... You really couldn't word it more graciously?
S: * I worded it great! I GRACIOUSLY told them where we got it.
N: * Suzy...
N: * Everything in there is pretty expensive, so we wanted to sell some cheaper stuff.
N: * In case someone, y'know...
S: * Wanted to buy some pretty cool trash.
N: * ...
N: * Let me do the marketing next time, Suzy!

> About your wares (NEW)
N: * We found all this stuff in Cascade.
N: * There's this big hole in the ceiling where things just fall down.
S: * It's AWESOME. I don't know if it's human stuff or what, but we've never seen it before.
N: * Do you think it's like, Santa?
S: * Nah. Definitely the Trash Fairy.
N: * There's no such thing as the "Trash Fairy"!
S: * ...
S: * What if Santa's the Trash Fairy?

> About Mew Mew
N: * Mew Mew...
S: * Mew Mew.
N: * She's awesome!
S: * She's overrated.
N: * Aw, why act like that, Suzy?
S: * Just sayin' if she wanted to make a GOOD movie...
S: * She'd have me star in it. Main character.
N: * What kind of movie would you want to star in?
N: * (And DON'T say a scary monster movie.)
S: * Uh, I wouldn't be the main character in a monster movie.
S: * I'd be THE MONSTER.
S: * YOU'D be the main character.
N: * You think I'd make a good main character...?
S: * I think you're scared easily, that's what.
N: * Suzy!!!

> Royal Scientist
S: * Uhhh... which one?
N: * They probably mean Alphys. Why would anyone be interested in SANS?
S: * Ahh, he's got some good ideas.
S: * Only a real genius knows ketchup is better than mustard.
N: * They're completely different condiments, Suzy. They have different uses!
S: * I mean, as a drink.
N: * Oh.
N: * Huh??????

> Royal Scientist (NEW)
N: * Fun fact, Alphys and Sans actually had a competition to impress Toriel.
N: * Alphys made Mew Mew's body and Sans knew a lot about quantum physics.
N: * It ended in a tie, so they worked together.
N: * They stopped talking to each other one day, and Alphys moved to Snowmelt.
N: * I wonder what happened...
S: * Probably got sick of each other.
S: * Someone who works too much with someone who doesn't work enough.
N: * Hmmm, reminds me of two people I might know...

[EXTRA] Shop (Dark Mix)

will get an actual pixel art thumbnail soon (as will a couple other songs) i've been a little lazy unfortunately

> Life Advice
* Advice? I suppose I can spare some knowledge...
* Let this be known, dearie...
* Do NOT work for Mew Mew. My CONFLICTION is conflicted.
* You see, the spider clans have been squabbling for quite some time,
* and so I took it upon myself to raise funds to help end this petty feud.
* One cannot deny a financial incentive, can they? Ahuhuhu...
* But MEW MEW... has me TRAPPED, like a... um...
* Like... a something, to another something or other.
* It's dreadful.

> Romance Advice
* ...Romance? I'm afraid you have the wrong spider, dearie.
* The only romance around here are those two girls selling trash.
* I've tried to make conversation with them, though only the antlered girl is any fun.
* That purple one... an intrepid one she is.
* I remember once during my one and only 20-second break for the week...
* That little vulgarian slammed the window open and DEMANDED 30 bowls of Kibblets for her and the antlered girl.
* EACH!!!
* Such a crass one... I ought to let my spiders feast on her, ahuhuhu~
* ...Ah... It is company policy not to talk about eating customers...

> Pastries
* Hm? Did those two tell you about my plight?
* It's simply a wish... To open a pastry parlor in Snowmelt would be a ridiculous endeavor.
* I am afraid Mew Mew has me figuratively locked up in here... though I imagine literalisms aren't off the table for her.
* The pay has been great, dearie-- I believe I've made enough for the spider clans!
* But, ah... Mew Mew fancies me as an "essential worker".
* My only dream as of late has been to see a 5-second increase to my 20-second break times.
* ...It is a dream.

> Mew Mew
* For my sake I'd ask to keep her name out of your mouth, but I'm afraid I cannot either, ahuhuhu~
* I complain, but I think... that she LIKES me.
* Is that not strange? To love, to cherish your only food service worker,
* WITHOUT gracing her with more break seconds?
* To give in to her idle, silly, flattering words is a frequent occurance for me, dearie.
* She keeps me in here, working me until I'm tired, and then gives me a word of encouragement,
* "Muffy, Muffy, MUFFY! Keep it UP, girl! Don't stop selling until you gotta give the TRUCK away!"
* Do not call me "Muffy", feline... Though I feel it's best for us both to keep the truck.

[EXTRA] Shop (Radio Mix)

Jingles that play when you find and pick up armors found throughout the Underground.

* "Bandage" - Armor DF 0
* A Halloween-themed bandage, bats and all.

* "Twin Ribbon" - Armor DF 3
* A cute pair of ribbons for pigtails.

* "Royal Shackle" - Armor DF 7
* Rusted and stained.
* Doesn't look like the Royal Guard uses these anymore.

* "Silver Watch" - Armor DF 10
* Has an illegible name engraved on the underside. Stuck a little after half-past ten.

* "Friendly Glasses" - Armor DF 5
* You can almost see through the colored lenses. Increases INV by 9, and...?

* "tobys helmet" - Armor DF 20
* Had to grab it before the sale ended!
* Raises ATTACK when worn. Recovers HP every other turn. INV up slightly.

* "MMTV Apron" - Armor DF 11
* Down came the rain and washed the spiders out!

* "Comically Large Bowtie" - Armor DF 12
* It's half the size of your body... Somehow, raises ATTACK by 5.

* "Heart Locket" - Armor DF 15
* A silvered, upside-down heart locket strung with a thread.
* It says "From Now Until Forever."

[EXTRA] Item Jingles - Armors

SANS: * sure is dark in here, huh?
S: * maybe there's a light switch somewhere.
S: * feel around the walls until you feel something that isn't wall.

[After walking enough, the human sees a red dot glowing in the darkness. Interacting with it turns the lights on, revealing a large caged Tobys. The red dot turns green, and releases the Tobys.]

S: * did you find some non-wall?
MADDIE: * Hello, hello, HELLO, MY LITTLE STAR!
M: * I was wondering where you SCAMPERED off to, mew~!
M: * It seems that you've walked straight into my little game.
M: * Did you miss the SIGN? "Beware of TOBYS"?
S: * the lights were off.
M: * Damn, DAMN, DAMN IT!!!!!
M: * (...I was proud of that sign.)
S: * a sign is, quite explicitly, NOT a wall.
S: * and i told the human to look for non-walls.
S: * so... it's more the human's problem for not noticing it.
M: * Hm.
M: * You have a point, mew.
M: * ANYWAY! Back to my GAME.
M: * This game is SPECIAL, mew see!
M: * SO special, that I had to fork out TEN-THOUSAND GOLD to produce it!
M: * That's a LOT! More than I EVEN HAD SAVED UP!!! HA HA HA!!!!
M: * And why is that? This is a SPONSORED SEGMENT from an ANONYMOUS THIRD PARTY.
S: * and how much gold did the sponsor give you?
M: * ...Not important.
M: * You see, we have to make our sponsor HAPPY, mew.
M: * And I may or may not have PROMISED to end this game with, erm...
M: * Harvesting your pretty little HUMAN SOUL for the QUEEN.
S: * oop. not so anonymous anymore.
M: * SHE WASN'T THE SPONSOR!!!
M: * Anyway, anyway, ANYWAY...!
M: * I've been yapping too much. Too much EXPLAINY-NESS.
M: * So how about you learn the game by yourself, hm?
M: * I think that would be QUITE the entertainment for our sponsor, mew~!
M: * (Just, uh... the game won't start if you're NOT on the dog.)

[The human mounts the Tobys, who gives a cute little bark in response.]

S: * good luck, kid.
M: * (Sans, you... know you can GIVE advice to them if you WANT to, right?)
S: * yeah.
S: * i don't want to.

55 - MMTV: The Sponsored Dog Race

* I do not understand.
* I do not understand your kindness.
* Tra ha ha...
* There was another like you, you know.
* Hm? Fallen humans? No, no...
* There is no reason for you to know my allegiances.
* Unless...
* ...
* But, you really are similar.
* I feel as though I must pass on to you some wisdom.
* Wisdom that has kept me... together.
* You must beware of the being from another world.
* ...You want to know what this being is?
* Tra ha ha...

* The answer is... imperceptible, from where we stand.

* ...
* Tra ha ha.
* You are approaching your very own "edge of the light", aren't you?
* Then you must continue.

56 - Deluge

SANS: * another dark room? you know the drill.

[The human feels around the darkness looking for something to turn the lights on. Instead of a switch, they find Maddie standing in the center of a room. The lights turn on.]

MADDIE: * Nye-LLO, AUDIENCE!!!
M: * I have some exciting news, mew.
M: * Remember our precious sponsor?
M: * Ha! HA! HAHA!!!
M: * ...
M: * They didn't appreciate that you survived the game and went back on their offer.
M: * TEN-THOUSAND G! DOWN THE DRAIN!
M: * DO YOU KNOW HOW THAT MAKES A VIOLENT, BLOODTHIRSTY CAT FEEL?
S: * violent and bloodthirsty?
M: * NOT! VERY! GOOD!!!
S: * ah.
M: * QUIET.
M: * ANYWAY.
M: * I WAAAS gonna use this whole set-up to like,
M: * Y'know. BLOW YOU UP. With bombs disguised as phones.
S: * phones? 
M: * Phones.
S: * where'd you get all these phones?
M: * When my crew acts up, I swap them out for bombs.
S: * huh.
S: * harsh, but fair.
M: * THE PHONES, NOT THE CREW!!!
M: * I WOULD'VE done the same to you, human, but, eh...
M: * I'm short on ONE phone-bomb.
M: * So, instead... I'm going EASY on you.
M: * Instead of having you play a game, find the bombs n' all that...
M: * We're just gonna skip to the "throwing bombs at you until you die" part.
M: * Issat fine with you, mew~?


57 - MMTV: Breaking Mews!

SANS: * so you remember when i upgraded your phone?
S: * you're gonna wanna press that big red button on the screen.

[The human presses the button. The phone explodes.]

S: * oh, right.
S: * i forgot i swapped your phone out with a bomb.
MADDIE: * You WHAT?
S: * haha, yeah.
S: * your original phone had a built-in EMP function.
S: * so, i guess that means one of these bombs is your phone.
M: * FIND THAT REAL PHONE!
M: * Uh-, SO I CAN TURN IT INTO A BOMB!!!
S: * i think you better get on that.

58 - MMTV: Breaking Bones!

* Hark! Do you hear that sound?
* The pitter-patters of a Person Prancing aPout?
* Is this the human wearing a striped shirt I've heard so much... aPout?
* I heard they HATE food.
* I heard they PARTICULARLY HATE sandwiches, and sandwich-adjacent meals(?).
* I heard they like to spike them on the ground (and or offstage).

[Atop a giant animatronic burger hinged to the ceiling, Burgersking descends to face the human directly. A teleprompter also attached to the ceiling follows his movement.]

* Now, now, little human! Go back to where you,
* To "whenceforth thou hithered from"???
* Or else, you must face the wrath of...
* The "King" of "Burgers"!

* BURGERSKING 7 ATK 11 DEF
* Having it his way, all day, every day.
* PLEASE stop him from having his way.

...

* Don't look so Blue!
* Have a Soda for Youe!

[A mechanical cup on a crane leans down and fills the battle box with purple liquid. After it's fully filled, it drains through the bottom, transforming the Soul ability color to PURPLE.]

* Huh
* (The SODA? Got them STICKY?????)
* (HOW LONG HAS IT BEEN IN THERE????)
* I mean, uh! Avast(???)! Have at you!


59 - A BURGERS DISASTER !!

* (There's a room just behind this thicket of vines...)
* (The walls are weathered with time and water.)
* (Small, barely living echo flowers litter the ground.)
* (This place doesn't seem to have been touched in a very long time.)

* You know, I've been thinking...
* About the surface.

* Yeah? What about it?

* There's... a whole world out there that we can't see.
* People to meet, things to do...
* Places to go.

* And? We don't need 'em.

* Doesn't it hurt you?
* Knowing that you'll never... get to see it all.

* ... I guess, yeah.
* But that's why you keep going, ain't it?

* Huh?

* You won't experience EVERYTHING, you know.
* So you take the bits and pieces you already have,
* Or, like, plan to have,
* And hold onto 'em.
* You get it?

* ...I think so.

* Good.
* ...
* So, what you do in this scenario,
* is GET UP,
* TAKE MY HAND,
* and BRING US TO SNOWDIN FOR SOME FOOD. Okay?

* ...
* Yeah.
* Yeah. Okay.

[EXTRA] A Memento

* (You knock on the door.)

* HUH? IS SOMEONE [There! Seize him!]
* NOBODY [makes them ring] THE DOORBELL THESE DAYS!
* COMING! I'M [Lois, I'm]!!!

* (The door opens.)

* [Erm, awkward...]
* I’M TRYING TO WATCH MY [Soap cutting]S!
* I BET MY [Wacky Stacks] ON THIS EPISODE! TEN THOUSAND [Big Greens]
* I JUST [wish upon a star?] YOU WERE MY [Same-day Delivery] TO BRING ME MY [TVDinner] AND [TVSlop] AND AND MY
* WAIT... IS THAT... YOU'RE [[HeartShapedObject]]?!
* WHAT? I SHOULD CH3CK THE [Time and Space] ON MY [Syst3m S3tt1ngs]?
* [Octbober 10] AT [8/7c]...
* [oh. that's wrong]! IT SHOULD SAY,
* THE DAY THE HUMAN [Large Fries]!!!

* ROTARYARIAT ATK 25 DEF 25
* A living rotary phone who tries to make big money!

60 - [Esperanto preterpasos ĝin] !!!

somewhat-regular uploads?


an UNDERSWAP-style AU made by j (https://soundcloud.com/phlbbth2) with the occasional music help from my friend august (https://soundcloud.com/aougoose)

CHARACTER SWAPS:
frisk / unused human
flowey / echo flower
asgore / toriel
napstablook / ruins dummy
sans / alphys
papyrus / undyne
annoying dog / temmie
mettaton / mad mew mew
muffet / burgerpants
bratty + catty / susie + noelle
gaster / gerson
asriel and chara are the same

UNRELATED (J'S UNDERSWAP)

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