If I Die

If I Die (feat. Julia Alexa)

go follow @rxseboy :)

yeah, listen close to my words, yeah
i'm a ghost, but it hurts, yeah
i got thrown to the curb, uh
all alone it's a curse, yeah
put my soul in a verse, whoa
they don't know how it works, yeah
i've been searching for a new life
see the stepping stones in the dirt? Yeah
i want everyone to love me
i want everyone to trust me
not gonna happen
i think about this every day
and dream about it every night
what am I lacking?
conversations in the mirror
no one there up in the rear view
driving alone
got no music playing when I'm steering
hope you like it when you hear it, yeah

why don’t you let me leave
i need some peace got a weight that’s on top of me
am i numb or depressed
as my feelings suggest 
eel like nobody wanted me
i can’t eat but i’m hungry
my body is numbing
don’t know what keeps stopping me
i’m finished i tried fixing a problem
i’m sticking to running anxiety coursing right through me
this shit don’t happen like shit in the movies
i should’ve expected to keep me protected
i had faith in an ending that’s happy
starting to notice that often don’t happen
i’m tired of fighting the feelings i have in my body
then saying im good when im asked
the truth is im upping my dosage
i smoke every day to feel okay and put on a mask
i wanted a love but it came with a tag
i wanted to smile but i’m breaking my back
put energy in just to get nothing back
i’m not falling asleep like an insomniac
i’m losing my patience
i stare at the ceiling my life being wasted
but i’m never changing
hope when you hear it gets harder to face it

yeah, listen close to my words, yeah
i'm a ghost, but it hurts, yeah
i got thrown to the curb, uh
all alone it's a curse, yeah
put my soul in a verse, whoa
they don't know how it works, yeah
i've been searching for a new life
see the stepping stones in the dirt? Yeah
i want everyone to love me
i want everyone to trust me
not gonna happen
i think about this every day
and dream about it every night
what am I lacking?
conversations in the mirror
no one there up in the rear view
driving alone
got no music playing when I'm steering
hope you like it when you hear it, yeah

@rxseboy- i'm a ghost but it hurts cover/remix (prod. ocean)

Nothing seem matter anymore
Why am i here, i feel so alone
It’s like i got a dagger in my chest
All i wanna do is stay in bed
Think i got lost in the darkness
Trying to find my way back home
Why am i here, i feel so alone
I don’t wanna die, but i think i’m gone

Nothing seem matter anymore
Why am i here, i feel so alone
It’s like i got a dagger in my chest
All i wanna do is stay in bed
Think i got lost in the darkness
Trying to find my way back home
Why am i here, i feel so alone
I don’t wanna die, but i think i’m gone

Losing track of who i’m supposed to be
It’s hard to feel free
When you’re stuck in the in between
And all you want is someone to take you far
Away from where you are
A place to find your heart, again

Oh i’m not ready to give you up just yet
But right now it’s tough cause you can’t see the end

Nothing seem matter anymore
Why am i here, i feel so alone
It’s like i got a dagger in my chest
All i wanna do is stay in bed
Think i got lost in the darkness
Trying to find my way back home
Why am i here, i feel so alone
I don’t wanna die, but i think i’m gone

why am i here, i feel so alone

this song means a lot to me,  so hope yall enjoy<3
also last release for a while since ill be super busy
love yall<3

written and performed by: @futoh
mix and mastered by: @futoh
produced by: @boyfifty

lyrics:
i didnt care, you were showing off,
yea no wonder we never blasted off,
you went with him with no care in the world,
but didnt look back to see what had unfurled,
dont look at me with those eyes and those curls,
you were my world,
but now i sit back cause i know that its over,
and through it all, yea i kept my composure,
tried so hard just to work it out, yea,
but you didnt want that,
you needed a reason to leave cause i wasnt special to you, and you got that,
but now that you want that,
what others cant give you,
but hey i was on that,
i gave you the world when you would wake up, 
dont say you forgot that,

(vocalize)

i didnt care, you were showing off,
but now it has come back to haunt me,
wish i could sleep with the ceiling off,
instead the memories surround me,
make it so hard to breath,
my sweat is soaking my sleeve,
i wont lose the fight to my conscious,
the next time she ups and leaves,
beat myself up for no reason,
i know im worth something,
but when im misused i just cant see it,
think im worth nothing,
you used to say i was pure gold,
but now where are you that ive been told,
that you didnt care a bit,
so ill find somewhere my heart will fit

no wonder (prod. boyfifty)

follow @juliaalexaa

www.fawlinmusic.com

Lyrics:

fire in my veins everytime that u talk now
i don’t wanna fight, but imma have to pull the plug out
tired of pretending, i just wanna be myself
but at the same time i don't know who i am

how did u fall for a guy like me
i don’t know how to love and i’m never happy
i sleep all day to escape my anxiety
the last thing i need is fucking liability

so keep clear, i got enough with myself
i know u wanna fix me but ion need ur help
i’ll keep digging till my mind gets some rest
i’m sorry if ur hurt, didn’t mean to upset (u)

fire in my veins everytime that u talk now
i don’t wanna fight, but imma have to pull the plug out
tired of pretending, i just wanna be myself
but at the same time i don't know who i am

everything i do, why don't u notice me
can't u see me down, i always bleed
all for u, i die for u, and u can't even tell me the truth

tell me that u love me, then push me away
i have to deal with it everyday
it's all for u, i die for u, and u can't even tell me the truth

and i'm holding on more than i should
you know i'd leave u in the past if i could
but you're driving me insane, can't get it out my brain
you're the fire in my veins, oh

fire in my veins everytime that u talk now
i don’t wanna fight, but imma have to pull the plug out
tired of pretending, i just wanna be myself
but at the same time i don't know who i am

(don't know who i am)

fire in my veins (w/ juli)

poison myself - Julia Alexa

knife in my heart - Julia Alexa

i want to live forever when i die - Julia Alexa

i don't wanna be saved - Julia Alexa

Nouvel Album – LAETITIA 

Chers mélomanes,

Je vous ouvre les portes d’un voyage intime… huit morceaux, comme les huit lettres du prénom qui l’a inspiré. Laetitia est un carnet de confidences, un dialogue entre ombres et lumières, entre ce qui est dit… et ce qui reste suspendu dans le silence.

Chaque titre est un fragment d’histoire, une pièce du puzzle émotionnel que je vous confie.
Fermez les yeux, laissez les notes vous guider.

🔗 Écoutez, vibrez, partagez 

Merci pour votre écoute, votre soutien, et pour faire vivre cette musique au-delà de mes murs.

💛
Sōraëlle

Te reconnaître, te reconnaître…

I can't do this anymore

hi, i write & sing <3
contact me on insta juliaalex.a
my spam: @ilyjuli
@lonelymusic18
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　　　ﾟ *.｡☆｡★　･
　　* ☆ ｡･ﾟ*.｡
　　　 *　★ ﾟ･｡
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i don't wanna be saved - Julia Alexa

☆Julia Alexa☆

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