فرساد، مرجان - باد پاییزی

Ogni volta in cui esco dall’armadio e faccio rumore 
Lasciami amare chi lo vuole
Nei giorni belli ti vorrei, ti vorrei 
Lasciati amare da chi non ti fa sentire 
Come se quel che le puoi dare è il poco che ti rimane 
Prendo il tempo che posso spero di non sbagliare 
Se questo amore mi fa male 
Non scappo perché non lo voglio accettare 
Ho paura sia l’amore vero della vita che mi scappa dalle dita 
Ogni volta che lo tocco lui si strappa io mi incastro
Poi mi ritrovo in un luogo che mi stacca da me stessa 
Io vorrei piegarmi alla tua danza 
Farti vivere leggero 
Ma non scodinzoli al mio arrivo 
E io ti voglio tutto e mi affanno assetata per berti mentre tu sei asciutto e continui a strizzarmi

Danza

Two sister-songs, with lyrics directly inspired by Dr. Ramani’s video “Narcissism: The Secondhand Smoke of Mental Health” (on YouTube)...

Why “secondhand smoke”?
* Even if you don’t have NPD, being around narcissists makes you sick.
* The harm spreads outward: family, partners, coworkers absorb the toxicity. 

Five recognizable patterns:
1. Malignant/toxic narcissist – sadistic, manipulative, close to psychopathy.
2. Grandiose narcissist – bragging, flashy, entitled.
3. Covert/vulnerable narcissist – “woe is me,” hyper-sensitive, passive-aggressive.
4. Communal narcissist – the #hashtag-do-gooder; public philanthropy, private cruelty.
5. Benign narcissist – vapid, superficial, not as cruel, but emotionally shallow.

Seven diagnostic hallmarks (the “big seven”):
1. Lack of empathy (the bedrock).
2. Entitlement.
3. Grandiosity.
4. Superficiality.
5. Chronic need for admiration/validation.
6. Rage when threatened.
7. Arrogance (dismissiveness, devaluation).

Other patterns:
- Gaslighting, projection, exploitation, jealousy, schadenfreude, manipulation.
- Comorbidity with depression, substance abuse, compulsive sex/love behaviors.
Impact on others:
- Creates learned helplessness: partners feel nothing they do makes a difference.
- Can devastate self-esteem, health, and careers.

Treatment:
- Narcissists rarely seek therapy voluntarily.
- Progress is very slow, at best moving them from toxic → tolerable.
- No medication cures narcissism.
- Empathy must be cultivated early; prevention is everything.

Hopeful note:
- Empathy is teachable in children. Parents should model and mirror empathy above all else.

---
SIDE A EPx3: “Secondhand Smoke” 

[Intro] Step right up, darlings, don’t choke,
This song is called secondhand smoke. It’s about cocksure egos.
Ha. Ready? Down we go.

[Verse 1] No mirror inside, so they borrow your face, Validation’s the drug they chase. Shiny cars, hollow eyes, Charm that blinds, and charm that lies.

[Chorus ] Mirror, mirror, what do you know? Arrogant hearts all need a glow show. Praise me, praise me… but can you grow?
Like, can you flow and bow?
(Or just blow, blow?)

[Verse 2] Entitled thrones on borrowed ground, Their laughter’s loud, their silence profound. Grand illusions, paper crowns, Lift you up, then tear you down.

[Chorus ] Mirror, mirror, what do you know? Arrogant hearts all need a glow show. Praise me, praise me… but can you grow?
Like, can you flow and bow?
(Or just blow, blow?)

[Bridge] No empathy, no remedy, Woke ain’t like smoke, ain’t your enemy. Round and round, the blowers spin, And sorrow seeps through my skin.

[Outro] Step away, darling, break the spell, Breathe your own air, and breathe it well. Leave their circus, let them choke, 
On their own secondhand smoke.

---
SIDE B EPx3: "Arrogant hearts"

[Verse 1]
Step right up to the mirror maze, Where charm is cheap and love decays, They smile so wide while they cut you thin, Secondhand smoke seeps under your skin. 

[Chorus]
No empathy, no remedy, Entitlement is their melody, Grandiose ghosts on high ego stage, Arrogant hearts and their puppets cage. 

[Verse 2] Superficial saints with a selfie crown, Validation junkies shake you down, Malice erupts when masks won’t stay, Gaslight fever keeps truth at bay. 

[Bridge] “Ladies and gents, beware the show! They’ll promise excellence, deliver shadow. Communal halos, malignant schemes, Covert whispers, grandiose dreams!”

[Final Chorus]
Learned helplessness in smoky air, You breathe their poison unaware, The crowd applauds, the tyrant grins, But emptiness echoes where soul cannot sing. 


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