7:18PM EST November 15. 2012 - There may never have been a movie whose quality mattered less than this final chapter of The Twilight Saga.

Like hungry vampires, rabid fans of the massively popular fantasy romance stories seem to love pretty much anything put before them labeled Twilight -- as long as there's the slightest scent of lifeblood in it.

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Given that voracious appetite -- and the low cinematic bar -- the fifth and final installment, Breaking Dawn -- Part 2 (** out of four; rated PG-13; opening Friday nationwide), should keep the customers satisfied.

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A Twihard must-have list is duly checked off here:

1. Must have dreamily passionate -- but not overtly sexual -- scenes of Bella Swan (Kristen Stewart) and Edward Cullen (Robert Pattinson) early on to get the crowd swooning.

2. Hunky werewolf Jacob Black (Taylor Lautner) must strip off his shirt at least once and show off his well-toned pecs and abs.

3. Vampire velocity must be highlighted, as they whoosh and sprint in their trademark rapid-fire style.

4. Most important, the vampire couple at the center of things, Edward and Bella (she became a blood-sucker at the end of Part 1), must conclude the conflict with a tender make-out session in a gorgeous natural setting.

The final chapter, based on Stephenie Meyer's best-selling novels, starts slowly with risible dialogue, but picks up in the second hour during an action-packed battle pitting Cullen's family and their new allies the werewolves against the Volturi, a rival troupe of vampires who see themselves as the arbiters of all things undead. Believing that Bella and Edward's baby Renesmee is some sort of vampire/human abomination, the Volturi are primed for a massive fight.

The finale features a diverse cross-section of Cullen kin from as far away as Russia and South America. But cousins from nearby Alaska (the story takes place in Washington state) look disturbingly like they just came from an audition for Real Housewives of Beverly Hills.

Hair and make-up are only a couple of factors that seem schlocky. Special effects -- particularly the computer-generated wolves -- look surprisingly second-rate. Worse are the bad screenplay, lackluster performances and turgid pacing. Lautner's abs are the only taut thing about this tween-centered soap opera.

Though Bella is now a super-strong, bloodthirsty vampire, Stewart's bored delivery and sulky expression remain intact. Her quips come off as bland snark rather than humorous asides. Better performances come from supporting players like Billy Burke as Charlie Swan, Bella's dad.

As Aro, the leader of the Volturi, Michael Sheen hams it up with a vengeance, a malevolent imp's glint in his red eyes. Dakota Fanning plays one of his key acolytes. She's supposed to send shivers down the audience's spine as she stands around and glares vapidly, perhaps having caught Stewart's dour-faced disease.

Amid the action are sweet moments with cute Renesmee (Mackenzie Foy), the oddly named baby born to the now married Bella and Edward. The child passes speedily from infancy (where the digital enhancement makes her look like an alien being) to girlhood. Mostly, it seems she's on hand to make fans adore Edward and Bella all the more. Now, they don't just stare into each other's eyes, they have an angelic moppet to coo over.

But the final scene is all vamp love, all the time -- in a floral greeting-card setting.

Fans of the series, which has made more than $2 billion worldwide, will no doubt find it all terribly romantic and deeply meaningful. The rest of humanity will remain unmoved.

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Welterweight champions Georges St-Pierre and Carlos Condit came in at or below the 170-pound limit Friday for their unification showdown.

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They will meet Saturday night in the UFC 154 main event at Bell Centre. Weigh-ins took place at New City Gas nightclub, where more than 2,000 cheering fans were on hand.

Gross: Condit Can Be Spoiler
Josh Gross provides five reasons he believes Carlos Condit can upset welterweight champion Georges St-Pierre at UFC 154. Blog

St-Pierre, the lineal UFC welterweight champion who has been out of action for nearly 18 months because of a knee injury, tipped the scale at 170 pounds.

"Just to come back, I miss this so much," said St-Pierre, who will carry a pro record of 22-2 into the Octagon.

Condit, the interim titleholder, checked in at 169 pounds.

"I haven't just been waiting to fight George St-Pierre this week," said Condit, who is 28-5. "I've been waiting to fight him my entire career."

All the other fighters slated to appear on the Saturday night card made weight for the event, including Martin Kampmann (171) and Johny Hendricks (171), who will meet in the co-feature welterweight title eliminator.

Georges St-Pierre is set to return to the Octagon for the first time in more than 18 months. In his absence, Carlos Condit became interim champion, meaning St-Pierre will be trying to reclaim his undisputed title in the UFC 154 main event.

Nearly five years have passed since St-Pierre began his current reign as champion by submitting Matt Hughes in an interim title bout. Now, Condit will attempt to start a title run of his own in similar fashion.

In addition to the welterweight title fight, Saturday's event will also feature another 170-pound matchup between top contenders Martin Kampmann and Johny Hendricks. There is a strong possibility that the winner of that fight will become the next title challenger in the welterweight division.

Furthermore, fast-rising middleweights Costa Philippou and Francis Carmont will try to take one step closer to the top of the 185-pound division in their respective bouts against Tom Lawlor and Nick Ring.

Before Saturday's event, which will take place at the Bell Centre in Montreal, Canada, the fighters will hit the scales on Friday at 4 p.m. ET. Video of the weigh-ins will be streamed live on the above video player. After the weigh-ins, stay tuned to Bleacher Report for all the latest on UFC 154 and the rest of your MMA needs.

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The Spaniard had a desperate afternoon at the Hawthorns and was replaced after an hour, with Daniel Sturridge offering a far greater threat in his 30-minute turn up front. But it is far from certain that the Spaniard will be dropped for such an important game, given the politics and personnel at play. http://watchjuventusvschelsealivestream.webstarts.com/

Chelsea managers have had their fate decided in an Italian cauldron before. Nine months ago Andre Villas Boas circulated a teamsheet for a last-16 tie in Naples that amounted to a suicide note. He dropped Frank Lampard and Ashley Cole, and a 3-1 defeat signalled the beginning of the end.

Di Matteo was part of Villas Boas’s staff in Naples that night, and it has been suggested he counselled against such a drastic selection gamble. and personnel at play. http://watchjuventusvschelsealivestream.webstarts.com/

Were he to drop Torres tonight it would be a comparable risk, though there are sound reasons given the Spaniard’s form.

Torres has started every game for which he has been available this season and has scored six goals without ever suggesting a return to the form of his prime. But he remains hugely experienced, one of a number of factors that may stay Di Matteo’s hand.

There is also the risk involved in leaving out a player so beloved of the owner. With Pep Guardiola ready to end his sabbatical next season Di Matteo’s job prospects may be limited in the medium term, but defeat for a side not featuring Torres could bring matters to a head, and make an already twitchy Stamford Bridge hierarchy even jumpier.

Nevertheless, Di Matteo said again yesterday that he would not hesitate to drop Torres. “I always said that we have two strikers in our team, Fernando and Daniel Sturridge. They’re both fit and I’ll have to see how we’re going to go tomorrow. [I will do] whatever I believe is best for this game.”

It was not a ringing endorsement of the Spaniard, and his name was absent when Di Matteo discussed the players for whom he would seek leadership.

With John Terry and Lampard injured, and Didier Drogba departed, Chelsea have a new spine, and Di Matteo expects them to deliver.

“We still have plenty of experienced players in the team, and leaders. Petr Cech is there. We have Branislav Ivanovic, Jon Obi Mikel who has been playing for many, many years now, and Juan Mata. There are plenty of players who can be leaders who will be out on the pitch here as well. I think everybody will have to show a bit of leadership in a game like this.”
Ashley Cole is expected to play after recent injury, bringing some much needed defensive nous to a side who have conceded 18 times in nine games.

Di Matteo must then decide how to strengthen the team’s shape, a priority after recent games, and with Andrea Pirlo plotting another dissection of English hopes. “We need to be more focused, pay more attention when we defend certain situations,” he said.

That could mean Ryan Bertrand is drafted into midfield at the expense of one of the creative trio who have made Chelsea so good to watch, but easier to expose this season.

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