ST:TNG Mirror TV Guide
by the Enigmatic Miss Sunbeam
read by Karmen Ghia

62. Yesterday's Enterprise. Champion bestest episode of all time! See, Jean-Luc and them are all messing about as they always do, and they go through a temporal rift where they're twenty years in the past and the Klingons are mopping the floor with the Federation and it's kind of an AU and everybody's nerves are on edge, and it's really sexy, and Jean-Luc has to snarl at Riker for being such a big freelance pussy, and barkeep Guinan is acting battle strategist (Whoopi is so wonderful; you can see how Guinan persuades Jean-Luc that she's right.) The greatest moment is one which repudiates all you TOS'ers [1] who say that Jean-Luc is a social worker and a big femme and a girlycow that goes moomoo. At an analogous climactic moment when Shatner just kind of weaves around and says "Those Klingon bastards killed my son", My Man leaps like Nijinsky off the bridge, says to the Klingons who want him to surrender "That will be the day, cocksuckers!" and proceeds to machine-gun his way back to "real" time. Words can do no justice to this ep.

Each episode will be posted on Sunday (for as long as I last). So rev up your RSS feeds or follow me on Twitter @karmenghiaville  Or just come on by every Sunday!  We'll love to see y'all!

1. The Original Series.


S3E62 YesterdaysEnterprise

ST:TNG Mirror TV Guide
by the Enigmatic Miss Sunbeam
read by Karmen Ghia

63. The Offspring. Trying to slash this episode is hard because it's DATA'S DAUGHTER! She is so cool! She looks like Snow White! (The casting is perfect: Hallie Todd plays Lal and is totally brilliant: did you all know in RL Hallie Todd is the daughter of the actress who played Millie on "The Dick Van Dyke"? She comes by her cunningness naturally.) Meanwhile, she's a misfit! She works in Ten Forward! She kisses Riker! (Rather nicely done scene.) She dies! Or blows a fuse! Or whatever! This is one of those great eps like "Yesterday's Enterprise" where so many emotions are present that one is left rather happily drained. But no real sex.

Each episode will be posted on Sunday (for as long as I last). So rev up your RSS feeds or follow me on Twitter @karmenghiaville  Or just come on by every Sunday!  We'll love to see y'all!


S3E63 TheOffspring

ST:TNG Mirror TV Guide
by the Enigmatic Miss Sunbeam
read by Karmen Ghia

64. Sins of the Father. Once in a while, I get a spell of KRF – Klingon-Related Fatigue. And this is one of those times. Still, I rather like B'Etor and Lursa. (If only for their hot names.) Besides, I must say if I were a young, ambitious, attractive actress and offered my choice of roles: Deanna, Vash, or a Duras Sister, I'd pick Klingon in a second. That whole Deanna/Vash thing is somebody else's strange fantasy, not mine, but Klingons are winners and that's IT for the Klings. (See, just when you think you're through with the Klingons, they give you a big open-mouthed kiss and everything starts all over again.)

Each episode will be posted on Sunday (for as long as I last). So rev up your RSS feeds or follow me on Twitter @karmenghiaville  Or just come on by every Sunday!  We'll love to see y'all!


S3E64 SinsOfTheFather

ST:TNG Mirror TV Guide
by the Enigmatic Miss Sunbeam
read by Karmen Ghia

65. Allegiance. Only the anti-Christ doesn't love evil-twin stories! Here we double our pleasure and double our fun with Jean-Luc's alien-synthesized evil twin. This is the only ep of TNG Mr. Sunbeam ever saw, so he thinks ALL episodes of TNG are like this, i.e. that TNG is a musical variety show hosted by Jean-Luc in Ten Forward. "Tonight, the Next Generation Boys and I want to sing *Minnie the Moocher* for all our friends at home!" All that aside, JLP has never looked foxier. And when the synthetic twin puts his limited moves on Bev, I stopped breathing. Oh, yeah, Deanna's alleged "powers" are useless in this episode too.

Each episode will be posted on Sunday (for as long as I last). So rev up your RSS feeds or follow me on Twitter @karmenghiaville  Or just come on by every Sunday!  We'll love to see y'all!


S3E65 Alligance

ST:TNG Mirror TV Guide
by the Enigmatic Miss Sunbeam
read by Karmen Ghia

66. Captain's Holiday. I don't want to talk about it. My therapy sessions are continuing nicely: I am allowed two thirty-minute walks a day and one hot bath a week, and, although I still have to use plastic utensils when I eat, the doctor says I'm doing much better. (Arrrrggggh; fifty of television's most traumatic minutes. Haggard Jennifer Hetrick creates a clone of Captain Picard who then swanks about Risa in the most amazing swimtrunks in American history while things happen. Meanwhile, the unfilmed truth is that the real Jean-Luc keeps his real holiday aboard the Enterprise reading the Peter Pauper edition of Marcus Aurelius. Hey, Jennifer turned up about 1998 in an Oil of Old Age commercial playing the MOTHER! Hahahaha! Sunbeam is avenged!) (You can see an unbelievable picture of Jean-Luc's swimtrunks on page 43 of the December 1999 issue of "Star Trek: The Extremely Expensive Magazine"; that's the ish with Odo on the cover. You will go *thud* when you see this photo. "Star Trek: The Extremely Expensive Magazine" knows its audience. In the December 2000 ish - Sulu's on the cover - there's a fascinating article on "Jim Kirk: A Man and His Ripped Shirt!" They even include a pie chart in page 18 showing Jim Kirk: 15 percent eps bare chested, 7.5 percent eps ripped shirt, and 77.5 percent eps fully clothed. You can see Kirk's chest in 22.5 per cent of eps! Not bad odds. Could be better. But not bad.)

Each episode will be posted on Sunday (for as long as I last). So rev up your RSS feeds or follow me on Twitter @karmenghiaville  Or just come on by every Sunday!  We'll love to see y'all!
www.karmenghia.com

S3E66 CaptainsHoliday

ST:TNG Mirror TV Guide
by the Enigmatic Miss Sunbeam
read by Karmen Ghia

67. Tin Man. Nice title, and the name of the top guest character is Tam Elbrun, which is a pretty cool name too. This is a staple ST plot: we meet an alien sentient intelligence and, uh, in order to . . . uh, deal with it, we leave this week's guest star with it as we zoom into next week, yeah, that's the ticket! (i.e. "Corbomite Maneuver," "Metamorphoses", etc.)

68. Hollow Pursuits. TPTB fearlessly attack . . . fan fiction! And mighty tepid fanfic it is. Poor old Reg Barclay gets on the holodeck and pretends he's super great. The best part is Data, Cap, and Geordi as the Three Musketeers. Brent, Lavar, and King PS really throw themselves into it, and they look FAB YOU LUSSSS!

Each episode will be posted on Sunday (for as long as I last). So rev up your RSS feeds or follow me on Twitter @karmenghiaville  Or just come on by every Sunday!  We'll love to see y'all!
www.karmenghia.com

S3E67-68 TinMan HollowPursuits

ST:TNG Mirror TV Guide
by the Enigmatic Miss Sunbeam
read by Karmen Ghia

69. The Most Toys. I once saw a fan letter bitching about this ep: a gay man, it grumbled, the only time we have an episode about a gay man, he's evil and he kidnaps Data and wants him to run around without clothes on. It took me a while to realize that this was a "bad" thing. I thought it sounded great!!! Face it, Internet: which interests you more! Data saves a kitten, or Data's kidnaped by an evil sodomite who wants him naked? Oh, yeah, which one would you pay GOOD MONEY to see? I don't think that being Evil is bad. (I possibly need help.) Besides, it's not clear that Kivas Fajo is gay; if anything, he seems quite omnisexual. (I am very sure Fajo's doing henchwoman Varria offscreen; she's Alice Kramden to his Ralph.)

Each episode will be posted on Sunday (for as long as I last). So rev up your RSS feeds or follow me on Twitter @karmenghiaville  Or just come on by every Sunday!  We'll love to see y'all!
www.karmenghia.com

S3E69 TheMostToys

ST:TNG Mirror TV Guide
by the Enigmatic Miss Sunbeam
read by Karmen Ghia

70. Sarek. If you don't love Mark Lenard, you are invited to step outside now. (Really, the nerve of some people.) Mark Lenard IS Sarek. He is so handsome and stately and lovely and sexy, and just think of all the hot babes he's had, THREE wives!!!!, man, he just can't keep it in his pants, can he!!!! Here (this is a cool plot) he's got Vulcan Alzheimers and he's weeping and boohooing and then the whole ship gets infected and Wes and Geordi square off making surly tiny sexual accusations at each other, etc. etc., and Bev SOCKS Wes! Yay! Anyway, Cap has to mindmeld with Sarek, which calms Sarek down long enough to complete his diplomatic mission and everyone lives happily ever after!!! (A classically brilliant scene where Picard has to let it all hang out with Sarek's memories: not necessarily hot but pretty cool all the way around.)

Each episode will be posted on Sunday (for as long as I last). So rev up your RSS feeds or follow me on Twitter @karmenghiaville  Or just come on by every Sunday!  We'll love to see y'all!
www.karmenghia.com

S3E70 Sarek

ST:TNG Mirror TV Guide
by the Enigmatic Miss Sunbeam
read by Karmen Ghia

71. Menage a Troi - "Lwaxana Troi, you WILL be mine." A darling little Ferengi gives that line a wonderful reading, and then there's naked Betazoids just standing there, as if their nakedness communicates something (odd, really), and Mr. Homm is confused and Riker tries to kiss Deanna and then he beats out those rhythms on a drum-like deal, and the whole thing is mildly shameful, both to watch and to have appeared in, is my guess.

72. Transfigurations. Is the tale of a strange alien with a wobbly face who gets named John Doe. Well, I'm okay with that; remember *Se7en* where Kevin Spacey played John Doe? Seems a sound enough role. Hey, rumor has it that both Bev and Jean-Luc look on John Doe with lust in their eyes (I myself notice that neither one can keep their hands off him). I hate John's tight- white jumpsuit, though; it's the prototype for Julian's terribly disturbing DS9 racquetball suit.

Each episode will be posted on Sunday (for as long as I last). So rev up your RSS feeds or follow me on Twitter @karmenghiaville  Or just come on by every Sunday!  We'll love to see y'all!
www.karmenghia.com

S3E71-72 MenageATroi Transfigurations

ST:TNG Mirror TV Guide
by the Enigmatic Miss Sunbeam
read by Karmen Ghia


73. The Best of Both Worlds Part I. Another seed of smut for me: see, Riker and them find JLP's clothes in a drawer. You know what that means? It means he's naked somewhere. Naked. Or even if not currently naked, he WAS naked. The suit is neatly laid out. So he was carefully rendered naked. The drawer is in a public corridor, not off in a closet. So he was naked in public. What a great idea! There's also a whore named Shelby and she makes everybody's life a living hell. Then Riker decides to kill JLP, who had turned into a Borg after getting naked.

So, that wraps up Season 3.  We'll be careening into Season 4, um, presently.

Each episode will be posted on Sunday (for as long as I last). So rev up your RSS feeds or follow me on Twitter @karmenghiaville  Or just come on by every Sunday!  We'll love to see y'all!
www.karmenghia.com

S3E73 TheBestOfBothWorlds

ST:TNG Mirror TV Guide
by the Enigmatic Miss Sunbeam
read by Karmen Ghia

Collected Season Three for those of you who can't wait until they post on karmenghia.com  I understand, really I do.

Karmen Ghia2

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