this is a remake of a song that i made in 2021, i remade it in 2025 as a reflection of who i was when i originally wrote it. i added more lyrics and breakdown sections

og from 2021: soundcloud.com/kittydoggo/so-numb-that-shes-in-hell
credit to jreg for the intro + outro samples! www.youtube.com/watch?v=b1ok44MXhrw

lyrics:
[jreg sample]
(hey doc. ive been wondering
is it me that's sick?
is my only hope to scrape off the edges of myself
that dont fit neatly into reality?
or should i carve a hole in the world
that only i can fit in?

and who is it that has the authority to tell me that im sick?
is it you?
or is the corporations that make the pill-pill-pill-pills-)

[kittydoggo]
i feel so damn proud when im off the addy
when i didnt take them i see others and feel saddy (BOOOO)
cause when i do drugs man i feel so happy (YAYYYYY)
rack the dopamine up i need it all for me

i need happiness i dont need drugs, drugs
dope me up until my body's numb, numb
how come every day i feel so dumb, dumb?
i need that dopamine in my system, um

popping pills so i dont fail school
life's a trip and i was the stool
bump my toe on sadness pick myself up its the cycle

popping pills so i dont feel shit
call me blunt when i dont hear it
hand me the pistol
im feeling a little violent!!

never expressed my own anger well now i can
its bubbling all out now like on a frying pan
and nobody in the system could give a damn
so im fucking up my system emptying cans

im saying fuck you to the system that never helped
its "break yourself just to function" and nothing else
i know they wanted to fix her, now look oh well
shes sleeping in a closet
so numb that she's in hell

never expressed my own anger well now i can
its bubbling all out now like on a frying pan
and nobody in the system could give a damn
so im fucking up my system emptying cans

im saying fuck you to the system that never helped
its "break yourself just to function" and nothing else
i know they wanted to fix her, now look oh well
shes sleeping in a closet
so numb that she's in hell

i broke myself just to function
i did what all of them wanted
oh
just a shell void of emotion
working herself to exhaustion, no

i need happiness i don't need drugs
but where'd my happiness go?
you deceived me, left me bleeding
but i won't let you steal my soul!!

YAYYYYY-A-A-A-A-Y
x4

4 year overstimulation
my degree's in ceasing function
sharpest teeth are barely working
it's all pills and carbonation
had no graduation day
no paper shows my work
was so numb in hell for nothing
i should kill you first!!!!!!!!!

[jreg sample]
instead of doing the inhuman amount of work it takes to finish my degree,
i instead find myself doing useless things!
for some reason i just can't bring myself to focus!

SO NUMB THAT SHES IN HELL (2025 remake)

「Profiles who have irl picture on them DNI. idk those make me feel weird in a bad way. so go away」
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pfp by; me
banner by; me
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autiat9c
Im an autistic dyslexic lesbian with adhd walking on the paths of internet n music :]
I like many fandoms n stuff and have ton of interests! Im a furry who doesnt likes furries lmao 💀and uhhh im also an artist and animator! :] im a huge fan of lukeyboi soooo means also corruptbox n incredibox in general! :D

i might be coming back to soundcloud but i mostly use bandcamp
https://kittydog.bandcamp.com

im kd
i eat ass
she/her and they/them
my alts are:
@rarded
@ipeedandfardedandshidded

ˏ⸉ˋ‿̩͙‿̩̩̽‿̩͙‿̩̥̩‿̩̩̽‿̩͙‿̩͙‿̩̩̽‿̩͙‿̩͙‿̩̩̽‿̩͙‿̩̥̩‿̩̩̽‿̩͙‘⸊ˎ


-_ he / they / it / ae _-

drawing in the banner by Kittydog!! 