© 2013 (recorded and mixed by Taylor Marvin)

please don’t leave
just stay asleep here

no I, I won’t be staying long
I’ll be gone
before you learn the truth of me

remember when we walked across the moon
got shadows on our shoes
and tried to wash them off
with the memory of wilderness?

but you forgot the towel
so the cleaning didn’t count
I can’t go anywhere these days
without staining cobblestones

yes all we ever were
was a headache at the hairline
trying to separate the face
and frontal lobe
why spend your serotonin
hoping to be whole?
this is all there is
don’t ask for more

I don’t want to know
your words aren’t safe for souls
take your keys and verbal weeds
and leave their paper leaning on the stove

remember when the wilderness was wild
a tadpole in the tide
incapable of stagnancy
through no choice of its own
you say that nothing good is breakable
but china cabinet corningware
and I reply that shards
are more valuable than

smoothen-edged deceit
cuts are kind to me
take your delicate desire
and bake it in the oven
‘til it bleeds

violence is in vain
the clearness of your caustic repartee
is plain as daylight 
so why do you waste your precious tune
on winding up the room
and spinning me away?

okay but please don’t really leave
just stay here 
and help my breathe

no I, I won’t be staying long
I’ll be gone 
before you lose the rest of me

I guess swimming through 
the awkwardness of time
is lost of feeble minds
there’s nothing in your head
but dead foliage of fools
why waste this brilliance
on bandaging the wound
burning up the bones is better

that’s enough for now
your thoughts alone are loud
take your rhymes and roundabouts
and leave them with your clothing on the floor

this is all I see
don’t wait for more

Prophecy

© 2013 (recorded and mixed by Taylor Marvin)

are you bored
by these borders?
are you sore
from getting seeds stuck in your throat,
choking on their potential?
sacrifice that synthesized
illusion of alone
for just a moment in the searchlight
I’ll fry you up
some freedom of your own
just stop showering with spiders
‘til you’re numb
it’s no way to get clean

you gotta get rid of the clamoring
whether it’s true or not
‘cause clocks just tick faster
when it’s hot out
they’re too sound
and saddled to realize:
realness is a state of mind
like sleep

are you dumb
or just darkened?
let me dim those bothersome beams
from your sight
groveling on gravel
isn’t any way to go
spinning in starlit intersections
won’t buy you any danger of your own
you gotta stop showering with spiders
to atone
it’s no way to get clean

you gotta get rid of the clawing
before it swallows us
those clocks can’t tick past us
if they’re dust
and slowing down
won’t warrant the wartime;
nothing is worth fighting for
but clarity

are you done
with these dungeons?
had enough
of getting seeds stuck in your throat
before they fill the room with
promise and the stinging sand
that’s still under your fingernails
from scrubbing up their sunshine
I can’t restore your brightness
if you don’t 
stop crawling into cobwebs
like they’re home
it’s no way to get free

you gotta get rid of the hammering
before it nails the door jamb shut
time can’t trap us
without trust;
we don’t believe in ticking or tape now
realness is an illness
just like me

Showering With Spiders feat. cellist Bradley Robertson

© 2015 (recorded and mixed by Taylor Marvin)

to me it seems like only
yesterday that I learned
the meaning of all these confusing words
and the nebulous notes they are tied to
I taste like the letters that made them
before they fell through the cracks
in my one-track overly packed brain

don’t you know that 
things are always over
before they start
they can’t tell us
how to break our own hearts
it’s up to us and
the restless ground

today lost its way
somewhere in the stargazing fray
I’d think about it more
but lately thinking makes me
dizzier than drugs for dinner
I would throw myself into the sea
but I mean more than that to me
but not quite enough
to give up this stuff
and hold hands with boys
instead of beer

today all of our old mistakes
fell out of our pockets like loose change
it's over
before we had to pay
but I wanna make giant messes
the kind you can't clean up
without redresses
yeah I would like to owe the world
more than it owes me

all signs point
to a dead end route
but I can't wait to see
how the story will turn out
I hope it’s up and down and hell
‘cause don’t you know that
things are seldom over
at the cliff’s edge
we’ve got miles of fall
to spin our own webs
it’s up to us and
the restless ground

today things are clear
we’ve got time and space
and fear of wasting it
I wouldn’t trade it
for the world inside my head
now look, I made some giant messes
the kind you can’t clean up
without redresses
and I would like to reap
the retribution I’ve sown

all signs point
to a dead end route
but I can't wait to see
how the story will turn out
I hope it’s hell away from home
‘cause don’t you know that
things are never over
until I say
they can’t tell me
how to write my own play
there’s a million different ways
to garden the restless ground

oh I lost today
somewhere in the stargazing fray
I’d think about it more
but lately thinking makes me
dizzier than drugs for dinner
I would throw myself into the sea
but I mean more than that to me
but not quite enough
to give up this stuff
and hold hands boys
instead of beer

to me it never seems
like I’m done learning these words
or maybe the right phrase is teaching
reaching and reaching
for notes they are tied to
I taste like the letters that made me
before I fell through the cracks
in my one-track overly packed brain

all signs point
to a dead end route
but I’m dying to see
how the story will turn out
I’ll throw myself into the sea
just to be a drop of water
in the holy H20 waves
they can’t tell us how
to dig our own graves
it’s up to us and
the restless ground

The Restless Ground

© 2015 (recorded and mixed by Taylor Marvin)

this probably is
another incorrect craze
I think I think up these things
just for energy’s sake
I need to believe
I can keep running on flames
‘cause they’re all that I’ve saved
I lost my feet
to the brainwaves

I want nothing more
than eyes to read my mind
so I keep my door unlocked at night
hoping they might
look in on me
and see how brave I’ve been

a perfect storm:
house and home,
like soul and skin,
remodeled by
time pushing in
you probably think
I use too many words
but my thoughts are like birds
that forgot how to flock
fuck your organized opinion
I need some rest
to better the rest of me

this probably is
another incorrect craze
I think I burn up these things
just for energy’s sake
I need to believe
there’s more than straw 
in my cage
but I forgot I was in here as well
when the rain came

I want nothing more
than hands to fill up mine
so I kick my covers off at night
hoping you might
wrap around me
and feel how thin I'm spread

I opened my eyes
the clock read 9:17
so I stretched in the sheets
and I grabbed my guitar to sing
as I lay there strumming blues in my bed
well it hit me like hellfire
I missed out on you
but not the rest

I want nothing more
than eyes to quiet mine
so I leave my soul unlocked
at night
hoping you might
check in and see
how whole I can be

The Rest feat. cellist Bradley Robertson

Daffodils

Disabled singer-songwriter living in Brooklyn. Raw, emotional, lyrically rich tunes. Imperfect and infrequent recordings.

Laura Tuthall