here comes the slut

wank it

mini putt

intro

LYRICS BELOW!!!!!!!!!!!

     CAESAR FLICKERMAN
I'll catch you like i'm a fisherman
Ur a parasite looking for a host 
but i aint Caesar Flickerman 
I could beat the shit out of you 
faster than an enema 
could ever do 
Shout out to ur sex hormones 
For making you so horny 
That you fucked me over without any warning 
You twisted the story
And If you want to go and act like Dory
Be my guest cuz bitch you fucking bore me 
I must be paralyzed cuz i can’t stand you
You must be nervous cuz I can't understand you
And ur voice is so high 
that it sounds like danny 
getting fucked in the fanny
I must be medusa
Cuz you can’t even look at me 
You fuck people over so often 
It puts everybodies virginity at risk
I'm not your psychiatrist 
I don't care if you cry to this 
You’re made up of lies
And i have to remember this when i want to cry 
Fuck you
Fuck you
Fuck you and you
I don't give a shit what you ugly hoes go do
Fuck you
Fuck you
Fuck you and you
I hope you suck dick 
Oh wait you already do


      COTTAGE CHEESE
I'm not gonna wait for god to give me revenge 
I'll do it myself just give me a hammer and a wrench
When kenzie broke ur heart 
I was there sitting with you 
Passing you tissues 
Did you forget what i did for you
You offended me but my mind is at ease 
Because i know that ur on ur knees 
Getting dick that prob smells like cottage cheese 
You and kenzie both switched sides 
Did you both ingest some weird pesticides 
That made you both wanna go start fucking guys
You give me weird molester vibes 
The way you always say ur joking 
Whenever you start stroking and groping 
your friend
I rather be homeless than work at davids bridal 
Cuz that shit would probably make me suicidal 
I'll bust open ur door faster than ur new dude
Remember when you showed my girlfriend ur nudes 
I'm not even mad cuz you have such tiny boobs 
And your pubes longer than the expiry dates on canned foods


       HORTON HEARS A HOE
Kenzie was right 
When she said she's got a cuter face than yours 
Cause yours looks like an incest babies corpse
I rather be obese 
than pretend to be healthy
Especially if i still compete 
to see who can eats the least 
Ur voice is so high pitch 
It'd make the opera singers twitch 
ill slap you with the book of mormon 
till you start hearing whos like ur horton (horton)
So much cat shit left in the litter box 	
Cause ur too busy sucking little cox
That's not very mormon of you 
sounds pretty unorthodox 
You shower as much as you wash your sheets (never)
You've got more hair grease than the amount of homeless on our street 
Oohhh kenzie’s got a cuter face than 
oohh
you're such a 
Oohh
You’re such a fucking whore

The new testament

horton hears a hoe

cottage cheese

caesar flickerman

skit

All negative comments about Mary solely stem from Abbie's words and opinions, not ours.

MISERABLE LITTLE BITCH
I cant tell what u suck more
Dick or my energy
ur closed off and shit at communication
Not even people of blood relation
Can give u validation
Cause ur cutting people off like amputation
with no explanation
ur truly ur moms creation
ur both the embodiment of Satan
I wanna give Scientology ur location
And tell them u need salvation
And got money for a donation
Oh 4 sure
Slam the door
Break the drawer
Leave people guessing
What the fuck
ur even mad for
I swear dealing with u is like a fucking chore
ur a miserable lil bitch
And no one wants to be around u anymore
When this is all through
And that bitch gets bored of u
What are u gonna do
Cause u fucked over everybody that even cared for u
Megan knows exactly what she's doing
But ur too stupid to see it brewing
I hope the guilt eats more than u do
And no matter where u go
u cant escape it
Cuz it's a part of u

RIP UR COLON 
Abbie did u inhale some laughing gas
Cause I've never seen you show affection like that
But here you are sitting in Megan's lap
Giggling
while u slap each other on the ass
u 2 sound demonic
When u call that shit platonic
u make me so sick I wanna vomit
He wasn't a pilot but u still let him put his cock in ur pit
Or did he just lick it
Either way u still let him hit it
ur too much of a coward
to deal with ur shit
u just go gossip with that bitch 
Who doesnt wash her pits
and smells like cheesy dicks
Yet u still wanna give her lips a fucking kiss
RIP ur colon
ur buttholes gonna be swollen
Cause Megan likes exploring
And to her back doors aint foreign
They aint foreign 

BETTER FRIEND
I wrote a list
Of all the times
That u would insist
That u could be a better friend
But then wouldnt change a bit
u should have just zipped ur lips
Or sucked a fucking dick
If you were gonna lie like this
u egoistic bitch
Anyways excuse my rage
Let me get on stage
And explain the length of the list that I made
u see its more than just one page
And it's not even double spaced
And the font is smaller than Tommys mental age
u must have lost ur personality
When u lost that weight
Cause now ur just so fake
And like a knockoff
Soon youll break
I hope u have a nightmare where
u have to sit and watch
Tommy baby talk
While ugly Megan licks his cock
Abbie and Megan cheat
Like a gluten free bitch eating wheat
Only time u twig ass bitches eat
Is when youre sucking meat
u two must be so hungry
That ur starting beef
But ur a fucking idiot 
for starting it with me 

CANT AFFORD COMMON SENSE
u wanna drag people through the mud
How bout I drag u so fast
ur bloods still blue when it comes out
Sit down u little white picket fence bitch
Hows your family so rich
But still cant afford some common sense
u complain that everythings at ur own expense
ur posing in a life of pretence
Cause I know u got fed with a silver spoon
And ur mommy had it the same as u
Me and ugly Megan used to always laugh at u
We used to joke and cringe
Every time ud say ur broke
Like what the fuck
Are u even talking about

OUTRO
After u broke up with T*
Who let u sleep in their bed
Who made sure u were always fed
Even ur mommy said
If u didn't have K*
you'd probably be dead
How can u not consider me a friend
I was there when ur relationships ended
I got u flowers and even pretended
To like ur new boyfriends
ur mom was the only one to reach out
She had no doubt
That u were responsible
For the way things turned out
u bitch
Even if youre rich
Youll never be worth shit
I hope the shame sits
In the pit of ur stomach
Right before her birthday
u displayed less compassion
Than the ration
Of food you consume in a day
You betrayed the only person
That would have stayed
If they weren't getting laid
Bitch u need an intervention
To help u understand
How to deal with tension
u got me thinking a lobotomy
Might have been a good invention
Grab that ice pick lets get some redemption

outro

can't afford common sense

better friend

Rip ur colon

Miserable little bitch

yah 
i lite that shit up 
just like a spliff love
they don’t even know love 
but i spit that every day man 

yah 
yo 
yah 
i write rhymes i get paid 
i spit that shit 
it’s in my vision 
and they know i’m pissin
my mum was a banker 
my dad was a poet 
but they didn’t know how to show it 
so i let it out 
(bark) 
i’m a dog 

i’m sorry for ur loss 
it’s a funeral 
blood on the ground it’s a funeral
every single day 
it’s a funeral 
and i don’t know what to say cuz they don’t listen 

it’s a funeral and it’s for you 
cuz like jake’s homework ur over due 
i run this shit like i’m Andrew 
why the stairwell always smell like doo-doo 

yah i like gay people 
they groove 
like a smoothie 
this is a movie 
get groovy with it 
yah 
there’s ads on the telly 
that weed is very smelly 
smelly 
yah 
that reefa 
cuz i’m smoking everyday love 
(bark)
i’m a dog 

i’m sorry for ur loss 
it’s a funeral 
blood on the ground it’s a funeral
every single day 
it’s a funeral 
and i don’t know what to say cuz they don’t listen

lil venis penis

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