from Sperm Bank Five "Slave to Momba" release

Sperm Bank Five - Death

the nice enforcer is a song about a superhero who would kick your dog, drown your children punch your nose, and break your mothers glasses.
but paul wasnt singing on this track so Dragan Stojanovic sung it in Serbian.

Photo : this is Zac the red house dog
we got him because he was going to be shot, he was skin and bone when he turned up
 he was tied to the washing line by his owner and would escape and go bush killing possums to eat and pulling down trees to get them.
he would destroy trees that didnt have possums in them too, bark at the beach until we carried him in with us, then he would swim in any water whenever possible including the most stagnant muck 
he was well known on Krd and would take himself out every night all night, rooting, killing and fighting and coming back with war wounds and bloodshot eyes having killed something.
we went to Celias Parents house one day qnd Zac got out of Horace the Morrie thou and disappeared for like 5 seconds and came back wirh bloodshot eyes and some black fur in his mouth
Liz, Celias Mum said "I hope that's not our bloody cats fur in your dogs mouth" 
we went in the house and went out to the swimming pool where their family cat was lying in the sun happily, Celia went up and looked at it and came back and said  "lets leave now" 
Zac had killed their cat, so it was obviously my fault cos I was the boyfriend even though he was Rogers dog.
they soon arrived outside the Red House and screamed and shouted at her and threatened to call the Health dept on us even though they had never seen inside the house.
eventually they got over it but they blamed me most of all for decades.
we went to our favourite beach and he caught a possum on the cliff, chased it to the water and killed it infront of all these families and kids sparking a big argument between us and the vermin loving local idiots.
we would have to walk down the road pretending he wasn't ours because people would come out and say is that dog yours? he just killed our cat.
he was a source of entertainment and went on tour and everywhere with us.
in grey lynn and ponsonby are little zac offsprings everywhere.
he was a comletely uninhibited animal and never backed down, I saw him get ripped open and had to pick him up under my arm because another dog kept hassling him and he just wouldn't walk away.
considered admirable qualities in human role models but unless you are the dog that sat on the tuckerbox on the road to gunder gai then your'e shit outa luck

?fog @City Hotel - The Nice Enforcer

from Slave to Momba by the Sperm Bank Five from Auckland NZ
partly recorded at the Red House Band room on Brett Orams dads 8 track machine and taken to Radio bfm studio for vocals overdubs squeaky toys and mastering.
the story was formed after watching a really bad film on VHS about a band that goes off into a remote place to record their next album.
Bealzebub appears after murdering most of the band and groupies in various unimaginative ways, 
the singer turns out to be the Archangel Triton who lured Bealzebub into showing himself.
You think you can come down here and use these poor souls to do your evil will, Bub? or should I say bealzebub 

whilst in christchurch Haydn Jones and I came up with this riff and recorded it on Lisa Bruces Portastudio at Celias place above the Mykinos Greek Restaurant in Barbadoes St. 
sperm bank five played it at our first practise and when lil si started singing bealzebub  it was obviously going to be a classic and maybe the best known SB5 song amongst our millions of screaming fans and groupies.

photo is 3 heads, zac the dog, and the morrie 1000 we bought off Barbie cos the front wheel fell off. we found out the engine was only ever going to be a 3 mains crank four cylinder 998cc pile of steaming morris minor engine, so bought gareth batstones datsun 1200 that he had rolled, so we did an engine gearbox, diff conversion, painted it green, making it fast in a straight line with all the braking and steering finesse of a middke aged morris minor.
A woman crashed into me and wrote it off 5 years later.
horace the morris, as seen in the famous red house photo by stuart page

Sperm Bank Five - Call Me Bub

Sperm Bank Five - Sausage Of the Night

Run me Over has:
Roger Fogorelli: Drums
Lindsay Fog: Bass, vocals 
Blaise Oarsman : Guitar 

this song is about being run over by a car and the people who watch and slow down their cars and cause traffic jams while they cop an eyeful of bones sticking through flesh and brains splattered on ground.
this obviously never happened to me and isn't a cautionary tale by any stretch.
it is an early ?fog song we made up as a three piece of tim, roger and lindsay, before sam swan joined.

Blaise also played Guitar in the 1st XV / the First Fifteen: a wellington band with
Tim Scott (rip) vocals, (also well known as the singer in a covers band called The Sheets) 
Jeff Miles (rip)Drums,
Scott  Bass.
 
Roger was the Drummer in the Wellington band  Riot111  with:
Nick Swan Guitar  (brother of Samantha Swan ?fog singer who was in Life in the Fridge Exists)
Void Vocals
Mark Crawford Bass

the Sheets were:
Tim Scott (rip)vocals
Gareth Batstone Drums
Phil Nelson Guitar
Julie Miles, Julie Scott, and Troy Carkeek as the Scandal Sisters : backup vocals
various other people including me on bass for billie jean and shake yr bootie,
others including Kirsten Smith from SB5 and Celia soon to be Mancini.(rip)

I didn't ever see Riot111 or the First Fifteen as I was in Auckland, too young to get into gigs even though we're the same age ,and we were busy in our first band after we left school:
The Laughing Cripples 
Nino Posa Guitar
Lindsay McKay Bass
Ralph Arthur Drums
Carl vocals

its all going backwards i should stop now before I have to list the unwritten history of new zealand bands that slipped through the chasms and werent mentioned in the definitive new zealand band history because we weren't on Dying Fun Records and weren't from Dunedin and recorded on Chris Knox's famous four track.

the car in the photo belonged to Tim Ord who also took over on Bass for Riot111 later,and of course ?Fog Guitarist, and is the car we used on our first tour to christchurch.  We slid off the road around a corner into a level crossing and knocked out a marker post or something in the south island but Im not sure thats where the damage was from in the photo, I think it was later, photo might even be in our backyard but I think it was written off later because we came back in it from the tour anyway.

?Fog - Run me over

Sam swan sings Roger fogorellis lyrics .
lily fog bass 
blaise oarsman guitar
roger fogorelli drums
jon cooper engineer last laugh auckland nz
A story :
"AFog got up to play, they were awful. One girl with blonde hair was trying to sing(well actually she just talked)and she was really annoying.Their lyrics were pathetic, they'd obviously taken too many drugs(well the girl had anyway) and they were trying to be profound and deep.
The audience just hassled them (quote from an anonymous person. "Go home and take some more drugs") though Afogs friends clapped it was  painful 30 minutes."  celia 1985 ish... from craccum magazine nz. about a performance at Streets Ahead Performance Cafe in Symonds Street probably a year before we met in person at a gig at the Parnell Library hall where a whole bunch of bootgirls jumped on Celia and started to beat her up.
Sam Swan thought "fuck this isn't a fair fight" and rescued Celia from the bottom of the pile and we put her in our van. 
We got drunk together the next day after she woke up in my bed fully clothed.
the next morning my xgf came back from Wellington and came in to my room in a rage, I got up and held her down and yelled "quick get out", while Celia ran out and Roger drove her home where she was leaving to move to Christchurch the same day. Mad gf chased me down Krd while Roger drove the van so I could catch up and jump in the back door like an elaborate film stunt.
she smashed up my room while I hid at Tims place, including my motorbike and slashed my bed and busted shit up. 
we had split up in wellington a week before but she hadn't seen it that way.
When we got to Christchurch on our second tour we played at the State Trinity Theatre, with No Idea and another band I can't remember.
on the way down we had found some magic mushrooms and Celia turned up at the gig. 
I stayed for a couple of days with her, there was a ferry strike and we couldn't get to our wellington gig in time.  Roger came in and said "lets go the ferry strike is over", hoping the ferry strike would be over by the time we drove up to Picton which luckily it was. it was a momentous journey and shit happened.
we got to our gig in Wellington but our singer Hamish Head had driven us mad trying to get out of the van while it was driving on the way up.
I'm pretty sure it was Stuart Clews the lead singer in Maggoty Anne and the Cot death Babies, who told us to go home and take some more drugs.
A few weeks after the tour Celia moved to Auckland and moved into the Red House. she was 19 and I was 24.
rock on Celia Mancini  1967-2017 
check out her soundcloud page I've looked after since she left us along with Glen Brewer from Leap Decade Records and upload to while her second album is being compiled and her vast archives are searched.

obviously this is nothing much to do with this song except it happened not long after we recorded this track for the 4 track 7 inch round black thing released in 1985 and at the Red House in the photo, but I only just realised you can write a whole bunch of stuff here under the song and still havent reached a limit yet of drivel that can be made up
(4000 characters of drivel apparently)
lily fog nov2019

?Fog Scream

Sam swan vocalises upon an early ?Fog song from the 7" round black thing recorded at Last Laugh Studios Vulcan lane Auckland Aotearoa nz some time in 1985.
we carried all the gear up 3 winding slightly but almost too narrow flights of stairs some resembling bumps on a wall while our thames freighter van sat in the middle of the pedestrianised lane below. 
David Appletons boat anchor Rockit guitar amp with 4 mesa boogie valves making it extremely loud and yet still sound as bad as a Rockit combo can sound,
Lindsay Fogs bass w bin, a 15" front mount bass cab and rogers 15 flare cab for the Holden Graphic I used for gat, and if you have ever been the top person carrying a speaker cab or chest full of heavy drum stands up or down stairs then you will know what fun it is to play music in a 3rd floor studio without a lift..
Roger Fogorellis drum kit,
2 bass,3 guitars, assorted heads,speakers, stands, cymbals,big heavy boxes of drum stands and cymals etc,  recorded 4 very short songs and mixed down in one session .
Engineer Jon Cooper
Lindsay fog Bass, Guitar vocals
david appleton Guitar
Roger Fogerelli Drums
Blaise Oarsman Guitar
Samantha Swan Vocals
and the Keyboards by Sorry I cant remember his name but he carried his keyboards up three flights of stairs and it was the first time we had  keyboard on any songs.

Photo is the youthful Mr. Roger Fogerelli on drums at the rising sun hotel upstairs bar.
 we played there quite a few times, it's across the road from the red house, 
we usually carried our gear out the front door and across Krd but drove most of it back in the van after a gig, I never left my bass or amps at a gig, we usually drove our gear back in the van after we played, often with passengers who had to help move the gear upstairs before we could go out to a party or three and argue over who was the least drunk to drive home.
sometimes we could leave speakers and heavy shit at a venue till the next day to pickup but was usually best to get it done on the night and sleep in.

MOVE YOUR BRAIN

from ?Fog City Enterprises Robert the record either 86 or 87
David Eggleton the punk poet and currently Dunedins Poet Laureate 2019 wrote and performed his lyrics upon a track composed in Christchurch whilst on our nz tour by
Piotr hanneveld, Guitar
Roger Fogerelli , Drums
Lindsay Fog Bass 
I have an idea I did two guitar tracks cos pete wasn't around that day or something, Im not sure why, it was over 3 decades ago, it's a little bit of a fog
Ithink we did two days laying the tracks and another mixing down, then jon Cooper did a bunch of work compiling the 2 two track masters.
we went to the EMI record pressing p;ant in lower hutt to master the acetates on the bg germany made cutting lathe, we also got a tour of the plant which was mostly cobbled together fromother presses heated by a steam boiler and had shop made trimmers, extruders and an electroplating plant to make the nickel deposited mothers from the acetate, thay were then plated with nickel and carefully seperated to make the pressing plates that were then pressed on the edges with a makeshift printing platen press.
EMI plant shut down a few years later leaving no NZ pressing plants left except for a single lathe in geraldine who does one at a time lathe cuts.  
there is folklore and urban myths probably started by emi themselves, that suggest they dumped the two mastering lathes in the wellington harbour,  
I am sceptical of these tales for a bunch of reasons, one it being too stupid to be true even though the entirely stupid is the most probable when it comes to human decisionmaking and when you put an overseas record label big cheese behind a desk into the equation the most brainless and selfish is the most likely to be carried out by pencil pusher paper shuffling lackeys in fear of their job even though the entire plant has been shut down to economise and avoid competition in a captive market in a country with only one pressing plant and no competition..
maybe they were putting their eggs into the new CD basket that would destroy vinyl forever that nobody had heard about and would be made overseas anyway and nobody would ever think of making new computer controlled record presses in 40 years time after downloads and napster had destroyed the unarchivable and limited lifespan CD and DVD market they had milked for a few decades whilst trying to push new formats of unrewritable digital storage on the not so eager public until mobile phones became the default music player streaming highly versatile pocket computer that made ipods and mp3 players obsolete in 340 nanoseconds.

?Fog KLEENSAK

Whilst involved with the Alternative Cinema TEP scheme we worked with the Punk Poet David Eggleton in the production at the end at the Maidment Theatre at Auckland University.
Later on we decided to try working together and decided to call our band ?Fog City Enterprises present: Robert (with one  backwards R)
we played some gigs and recorded an LP at Last Laugh Studios in Vulcan lane.
We had been trying for the Queen Elizabeth Arts Council recording grant and had got one for the ?fog city enterprises presents THE. ?Fog 4 track 7inch round black thing for new recording artists.
so we applied again but only go $500 to record it all so Roger funded it because he was the only one of us with a job.
Jayrem Records in Wellington who also released Flesh Device I think, decided to give us this deal similar to our first record, they gave us 100 copies out of 500 as our payment that we could sell in Auckland and recoup some money since they hadnt had to front us for recording costs.
this is one of the songs Piotr, Roger and I made up in the days before our tour, piotr was waiting for Not really Anything to get their shit together so played with us in the meantime.
David Eggleton wrote and performed his words on half of the tracks on the Robert the Record record.
he is currently Poet Laureate 2019-2020 residing in Dunedin Aotearoa (nz)

?Fog REMOTE CONTROL

just roger and I on this track,
we still used to play gigs when we didnt have a guitarist until a spotty pink haired David Appleton came up to tell us we needed him on guitar, he moved into the Red House with his girlfriend Heather because the skinheads at the Big House were a bunch of meanies who liked to pick on skinny weirdo punks with long pink hair and wore a dressing gown and looked like a hippie punk that didnt easily fit into a category.
he later referred to himself as Sylvester Hovensvitch when it came to filling out official census forms, he was a 94 year old lady.
This photo is of me after waking up in the loft that Tim Ord built downstairs from double tongue and groove 6x2s that Lockwood house walls were made from in  the front room that I had when I first moved in from 52 Grafton Rd.. 
the loft had a steel galvanised ladder made from the fittings that front wire mesh gates were made from and I can only imagine that I fell down the ladder so drunk that I climbed back up and went to sleep waking up with a six inch long scar.
this is one of two times I woke up injured, the second was when I took my Vespa 90ss to a gig at the Windsor Hotel in Parnell. Usually I chucked the vespa in the back of our Thames Freighter Van but being drunk and impervious to injury I rode through the winding road in the auckland domain, cutting a corner and meeting a car coming the other way and also cutting the corner. i think they may have been drunk.
I woke up on the ground, tried to pick up the scooter but the handlebar was broken off, the people said "hey you can't leave, you just dinged our car" 
Along came a guy on a motorbike and said "I have my first aid ticket, can you move your fingers?  where does it hurt?  Are you too out of it? 
I said yeah, he said hop on and we gapped it leaving my poor beloved vespa 90 super sprint that was given to me by my boss at Scooter House on K road when I worked there.
I had my full face helmet on still so was sure nobody knew what I looked like except for a drunken guy on a scooter.
I woke up upstairs and couldn't move, I had a broken finger on my left hand and couldn't play bass, both legs were pretty fucked and it was hard to walk with two crutches cos of my broken finger, the knuckle was pushed in compressing the straight bone on the top of my hand as I hit the bonnet.
Luckily I was drunk so was relaxed enough to flop around like a rag doll without breaking any important bits, it was a head on crash both vehicles speeding over 40mph each.
Didnt go to hospital as i didnt want to get busted for drunk in charge causing and leaving the scene of an accident and we splinted the finger to the next one with a hotdog stick and a bandage.
I hobbled around for a month on two crutches Phil or Gareth left at the house, it was summer and we used to go around the rocks to the next beach to Takapuna and it took ages and I felt like an idiot of course.
 sort of shit you do when you are 25 or so and feel invulnerable and clever.

?Fog tin soldier

there was once these large format information things made from printed bits of tree fibres that were sort of like a computer or mobile except you could wrap fish in them or clean windows and start a fire with, that were sold in things called a Dairy, these were shops that sold milk bread lollies smokes and food kind of things and not vapes or fake smart drugs or mobile phone topup vouchers as these all hadn't yet been invented.
nobody had foreseen the necessity of any of them at that time.
In Auckland NZ one daily newsprint page bundle sold in the afternoon was named after this song.
Sam Swan wrote and sung the words to this song at one of our first practices with her at Rogers warehouse down by the old ACC Destructor building with the big chimney now called vic park markets and a horrible gimmicky shadow of early aucklands industrial steam technology and horse driven municipai services this place now is.
it is pretty hard to find people living in these warehouses we all used to live and have workshops in now cos they are either shitty leaky apartment buildings or even shittier made malls and shit or demolished for a car park.
this is where the city is being murdered by machines came from that is in the ?fog song 'Scream' .
 when I moved into the Red House, 8 west terrace, we had been living at 52 Grafton rd. and our house was the last multi story wooden boarding house out of about 20 that was demolished in around a year to make way for architects and just dumb offices that dont actually house people.
The evil corporations like chase and all the rest arent around now either, so they didnt even outlast some of the crap offices they replaced with newer crap offices that they destroyed the community for their money addicted owners.
they and numerous faceless corporations wreaked an irreversible conclusion to the thriving community and succeeded in pushing inner city dwellers who didn't own houses out to the bleeding suburbs in the name of money helped along the way with tax incentives by the auckland city councils backward thinking department ironically named after some guy called Mr.Planning.
the newspaper was shut down for some reason I could possibly fabricate here right now as I can't remember the truth about it at the moment but I'm feeling a little short in imagination after a long day .
now I remember, it's something to do with never letting facts get in the way of a good story and it's appropriate to this inane rant.
the nz herald and most regional newspapers are this same bunch of sensationalist headline writing to catch the readers eye soundbitey or catchphrasy sort of crap mongers writing what they think people want to read but cherrypicking which articles of absolute misinformation fit the current agenda of the real lizard people in charge, not the the mormons or the people next door whose wafting air of cabbage drifts upon a mornings breeze.
this put a whole industry in turmoil as the huge printing plant i once worked at was closed and everyone was laid off and the letterpress department was turned into wheel balancing weights.
little did anyone know the digital revolution was holding its sword of damacles over not only the printing industry but also the music industry and many others like the television companies monopoly on content for captive audiences, radio stations to some degree.  
a whole bunch of super rich people were created to grasp the context of exploiting and inventing new technologies and inventing words and catchphrases like soundbite, gigabyte, silicon valley startup and it all caught on in a small number of years to the point that zombie phone staring walkers haunt every small metropolitan centre, footpaths, pedestrian crossings, 
and buses
I don't have a problem with this however and count myself as one of the unwitting phone staggering products of the urban zombification scheme 

sam swan vocals
roger fogorelli drums
lily fog guitar, bass
etc...

?Fog AUCKLAND STAR

this is Jim Jones the red house cat 
David Appleton ran over his head with the front wheel of his Simca Etoile while braking heavily on the gravel in the driveway in the red house backyard off Karangahape road. 
Jim ran away for a day or so then came back and hung around on his chair with the crochet cushion and was back to normal in a few days.
Of course David felt bad for not just driving over his head but skidding with the front wheel locked up because he drove so fast into the backyard in the simca called Barbie and Jim just happened to run straight under the front drivers wheel with perfect timing.. there was fur on the driveway and we thought he was pretty well fucked 
this tale gave birth to the notion he was indestructible hving maybe 4 or 5 lives left, over the years he returned to visit after he moved out and hung around for a bit.
Originally he was named Murray by the woman who brought him to us.
I suspect it was Stuart Clews from the band Maggoty Anne and the Cot Death Babies who named him Jim Jones but I can't be sure without asking someone else and they aren't right here at the moment so this will have to suffice for now but as information becomes available I could update this.
Paul Linaker, Also from Maggoty anne and the cot death babies and the Ordained Minister of the Religion of the Highest Thought (RoHT) also had a cat called Salisbury, she lived with us at the Red House along with Zac the dog, and jim jones, and a large number of human beings including all the band members of the fog, Afog, Afog and the throat, ?fog city enterprises present Surgical brain implant, Robert the band, Maggoty anne and the cot death babies, and The Sperm Bank Five  (SB5) at different times throughout the years.
Salisbury was taken by Paul to a farm up north, leaving JIm as an only cat.
One night in the alcove outside the back door there was a whole bunch of noise alerting us all to the possibility someone was trying to break in to our band room or steal wendys pot,  we found Jim Jones banging around with his head firmly stuck inside a cat food tin that someone had opened with an old fashioned stab and rip tin opener unlike the ones now that take the whole top off with the two intersecting circle things.
I had to cut the tin off with a pair of tinsnips as we held him still. he ran away of course but always came back like a cat.
he usually came back as a cat.

?Fog MEATWORKS

untitled  from the container 26 jun 2020
muz gat
lil bass
jeremy drums

recorded in a shipping container on my phone

- Container  untitled - lil n muz n Jer

brian the song
audio lifted from robert the record 1987
words written and delivered by david eggleton
drums beaten by roger fogarelli
guitar tortured by peter hanneveld
bass manhandled by lindsay fog
image lifted from brian the video,
video filmed by stuart page on 16mm
cast and crew:
stuart page, 
roger fogarelli as brian
kirsten smith signing receipt
dick and joe from crate freight, it's great mate,
erik gottleib as ww2 soldier
roger fogarelli as new liquid blah salesperson- 1093 uses around the home
lindsay fog pitchfork weilding samaritan
joe mcbus-gorillo chev driving yahoo hippie

video ostensibly made for our 3 minutes of notoriety on tvnz's radio with pictures which was very hard to accomplish back then before youtube what with all of the bureacratic hoop jumping fuckery involved just to be able to drive around avalon studios' building backwards in a van full of weirdos

?fog - Brian

?fog - Hand break

?fog - Supermarket

artwork paul linaker
noise two else someones

feist of nein -  non arborious repartition -2020 - 07 - 13 - 21.48.23 - lily fog

Death March Of The Gloriously Attired Part2 2020 - 07 - 25 - .mp3-

same thing but different as container thingy

image of moon as an infant

02 Drum+Bassss

01-ballistic re-entry .mp5 .zxl

04 a quick repair .mb7

bangers and jeremy trancendental beatnik poetry wit backing by
muzz guitar
simon bass
lily drums

lindsay fog

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