mess it up

have i changed?
cause next year i'll be so far away
spent my whole life in this town
just to move across the state

i wont see my family
i wont see my dog or my friends
or the faces i knew all too well
i never thought this would be the end

so far

i've been feeling really nostalgic for three years ago when i was figuring out who i was and constantly making new friends online, so here's a mashup i made to remember and look back on the feelings i felt while listening to some of the most iconic url fests and watching the chat zoom by. if you were around for that era, hopefully it rekindles that feeling for you as well. enjoy the mashup!

please consider sharing with someone else who might like this, it would mean a lot c:

tracklist: https://pastebin.com/raw/nhT2m6pX (but before you open the tracklist see how many songs you can recognize without it. the current record is 28 by noah major who also compiled the art for this bless them)

good morning (a mashup)

go to sleep
go to sleep

go to sleep
go to sleep

i feel im running out of time
to see you by the riverside
ill drift to sleep and see you one more time

waterbed

STREAM/BUY - https://ffm.to/40fantasy
FEATURING @therobyguy

Lyrics:
Why'd you go back on an omen
Call up on a moment
You gave everything that you had
Oh, I'd want you back if you told me
We're living in a story
You gave everything that you had

If you were happy, tell me the sounds
That you heard everyday of your life
If you could dig me a hole in the ground
Something to keep us playing around and around

If you could show me who I want to be
We could tiptoe around our hearts
If you could show me who you want to see
We could skip the imaginary part

Why'd you go back on an omen
Call up on a moment
You gave everything that you had
Oh, I'd want you back if you told me
We're living in a story
You gave everything that you had

Cut ties, dead weight
Figure out
Oblivious all of the time
Show me
All the times you fell
And I think that you're my remedy
Falling back, falling back
Eyes rolling, seen it all
Miss that, miss that
Tied to an idea
'Cause I've been waiting for too long
From dawn 'til the sun will set

If you could show me who I want to be
We could tiptoe around our hearts
If you could show me who you want to see
We could skip the imaginary part

Why'd you go back on an omen
Call up on a moment
You gave everything that you had
Oh, I'd want you back if you told me
We're living in a story
You gave everything that you had
But if I told you the truth
Could I close my eyes & hear you say it too
And if you whisper "I love you"
We could skip the imaginary part

Stream

Living in a Story (ft. ROBY)

@saoirsedream

FRIENDS, WRITTEN BY A. SARGENT, A. AUTUMN, C. EGBERT, PRODUCED BY ALASKA SARGENT.

You wouldn't have to lie to me if you were self-assured
You wear a mask and consider it your allure
I've been through this before
You go back on your word
And you walk out the door
I tell you it's absurd
Who cares about your complexion
You highlight your own imperfections
"Tell me you love me," you say
What is the use anyway?
You throw me around like a muppet
Upon my string, no interruption
You tell me, "I love you, just stay"
Yet you hold me up on these strings

You said, "break yourself clean in two
I'd do the same for you"
Beyond the ocean blue
I pray that we are through
Some fucking friend you are!
I start to fall apart
And still you watch
As you don't know just where to start

Wish all of this could work
We could keep what's on the surface
Save the depth until it's worth it
I need all the infighting to stop
You can look at me like I'm selfish
Is it so wrong to need some focus
I get your hearts are broken
But I'm losing family to time
In more ways than one
I know I sound pathetic
Poor Catie wants attention
I'm sorry for your loss
I can't value validation
I won't wait through conversations
For one short turn to talk
You should know it's not enough

You said, "break yourself clean in two
I'd do the same for you"
Beyond the ocean blue
I pray that we are through
Some fucking friend you are!
I start to fall apart
And still you watch
As you don't know just where to start

Friends (feat. saoirse dream)

To Hear Your Voice

came crashing thru ur boundaries
confused friendship with tug of war

as much as i tried
i dont think ive treated you right

so let me be the one
to build up a wall
its fine if we catch up again
once in a while

i never had the kindest eyes
a little souvenier of some terrible years

cant get rid of the worried looks
that keep staring back at me 
through every mirror that sees me

back+forth

every iteration needs to be cherished

bandcamp:
https://northerncloud.bandcamp.com/album/tie-dye-sessions
spotify:
https://open.spotify.com/album/5UJFzuAv8x7nRGiqRor5hu?si=5ZbXiHJkSsuBgfcI2gwWNg
youtube:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C7ZnyrNZzt4

iteration

i don't know
where to _____

sitting at the corner of the table
told me you could fall in love
you don't want a label

you just want to lay low

i -
i -
i -
i.

she sits on the bed, legs crossed/cards dealt

guess the key_chapter312

something on the way to work is telling me to watch my step
something in the way you talk is telling me to hold my breath
i don't want no pills in my house no

mess it up

luminism

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