The 50 Most Essential Tchaikovsky Masterpieces

In 2024, I travelled to France to study Bouffon (a type of clowning) at École Philippe Gaulier. I am a musician/composer and did this to improve my stage presence, but I learned much more than I had bargained for...

The course was incredibly intense and all-consuming. However, I did find time to record a lot of 'Bouffon' sounds - laughter, giggles, swearing, shouting, and other strange noises. A central part of Bouffon practice is to mock and parody people you hate. Hence, towards the end of the course, I made a short theatre piece about frogs based upon an infamous Alex Jones quotation 'I don't like them putting chemicals in the water that turn the friggin' frogs gay!' To support me, all of my classmates pretended to be frogs engaging in... er.... intimate acts. The theatre piece was a glorious failure, but inspired Frog Buffoons.

Frog Buffoons features an electronics part that combines the Bouffon audio with frog sounds in addition to the noises produced by a French frog children's toy. It is a very strange piece, but the Bouffon course was a very strange experience.

The fixed electronics part is improvisatory in nature, in that the source sounds are recordings of me and my classmates improvising. However, the way in which I used these recordings was also improvisatory; once I had placed a recording into my Digital Audio Workstation, I did not allow myself to delete it. I had to use it and make it work via processing and recontextualising. Finally, the live melodica part (which I play myself) is entirely improvised.

Frog Buffoons

I was recording some material for another composition of mine, just outside Köln Cathedral. There were two dogs yapping at each other; I loved the sound, but it just didn't fit the piece.

I was asked to perform a piece for the Music Patron launch event at the Groucho Club in Soho, London. I decided to make a new work, using a tiny snippet of the discarded dog sounds.

German Canine Waltz Time

On the 12th of May 2025, I was shocked to discover that my wife was a stranger (at least, according to Keir Starmer). 

I have sampled Starmer's speech, reversed it, slowed it down, and processed it in an (impossible) attempt to musically counteract his Reform-like rhetoric. This is an ambient composition that can be listened to in isolation, or used as an accompaniment to improvisation. 

Strange Island

Piano Concerto No. 1 in B flat minor Tchaikovsky

The 50 Most Essential Christmas Masterpieces

The Nutcracker, Op. 71a: II. Scene: Allegro non troppo - Decorating and Lighting up the Christmas Tree

The Nutcracker, Op. 71a: III. March: Tempo di marcia viva

Tchaikovsky: Symphony No. 5 in E Minor

Symphony No. 5 in E Minor, Op. 64: II. Andante cantabile, con alcuna licenza

Max Bruch - Violin Concerto No. 1 in G minor, Op. 26 - (1866)
Vorspiel: Allegro moderato (in G minor)
Adagio (in E-flat major)
Finale: Allegro energico (in G major)
Soloist - David Garrett
Conductor - Jamil Maluf
Orquestra Experimental de Repertório
Live recording - Theatro Municipal de São Paulo - São Paulo - Brazil - July 6 2003
Illustration - Anselm Feuerbach

Symphony No. 5 in E Minor, Op. 64: II. Andante cantabile, con alcuna licenza

London Symphony Orchestra

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