For the only person I can picture dedicating my life to

Nothing I Can Say (Dedicated To My One And Only)

INTRO)
Don't cry, dry, your eyes, Sounds pretty stupid knowing I'm the reason why...
Verse 1)
-I found a friend, during a round of down and out again, saw past the coal to my bones found a gem(Jim), Saw past my defence over crowding the rim, Phil Jackson: believed when I gave her doubts to begin
-Still pulled for me though, had me speaking Romeo, had me getting real about things we only know, Planting seeds watching trees slowly grow, Grew apart because I grew attached to issues from before
-I found a woman clearly showing that she care for me, million miles away telling me how she'll be there for me, I'm overthinking thinking am i thinking carefully, To the point words made her never wanna hear from me
-Yeah i know pushed till she pulled away, Now im just going through the motions through the day, Man mind what you say It can define what you may, Not see now but different time different day
-You'll be looking back like Jason Bourne, Paranoid flashes of a past creating storms, Might even have you trying to rip the mic to prove you aint been torn, while your living in a blizzard convinced you can make it warm
-Not likely, wonder if I like the pain mikey, psyche myself up to where I hate my own psyche, Impure immature insecure nightly, trying to change her mind until she dont like me
-Still a boy, obviously, Made my own Helen of Troy into my Achilles, Baby if you hear now I hope you probably feel me, In the moments where we owned it babe you got the real me
-In the end pushed till she pulled away, Lost a lover and a friend still feel a fool today, Knowing what I held onto and threw away, Got me trying to shake off cold nights through the day
Verse 2)
-Yeah its weird feeling Im where the sh!t gets weird, she's saying I love while her chin drips tears, me I'm trained to listen with defensive ears, So I aint hearing she been dealing with this shit for years,
-Now shes alone with our distance near, to her heart trying to save her gave her different fears, Took losing love to get this sincere?, Too little too late pain doesnt disappear
-So we both alone again, staring at the phone hoping when, It rings that it's you but it's not choking in, Uncried sobs undercover broken man, Right back writing what I should of told you then
-Pushed till I made her pull away, Now I see her eyes glaring at me through the haze, seeing what I held onto and threw away, Man I gotta talking till there nothing you can say.
Verse 3)
-Jaded, Ignoring what she's pouring through the phone, Now she's coming home like "what is going home?",  Went from alone but still holding her own, Then let a man in that made her let go for holding on
-You know the song, Probably know the symptoms too, Millions that listen knowing this is you, I was stumbling so soon as she tripped I tripped too, But honesty: there is no other just you
-Real talk, never would've dreamed YOU'D get to me, Eventually it what's you got the closest you forget to see, Now I see what she looked past just to get with me, Turned I love you into You Aint Shit To Me
-Followed suit, Pushed till she pulled away, Now I'm all alone with my shield proving way, Beyond a reasonable doubt when your calm you convey, What you cant busy talking till there's nothing you can say
OUTRO) 
Im still holding on to the wrong things,,, Now Im praying its you when every call rings... That one thing
Sarckazm

Los Sole