Forgive the shoddy production! I am a bit of a schlemiel when it comes to mastering & EQing... Maybe I should hit up Skrillex? You figure I could get him outta-bed-in-the-morning for it on grounds of asking, "pretty, PRETTY please??? Lol. I bet money is practically no object to the guy, nowadays... WELL ENJOY! These are a few musical ideas I have hatched over the course of the last few months here and there, whenever I felt "The Inspiration" dawning over me. I like to think it expresses an heir of magnificence, or something... PBTTH! (fart noise)

Fractal Labyrinth IDEAS

Couldn't help but think this crusty little tune -- hardly having developed out too far at all since being set down, all that time so long ago; some day in January of 2015 by the file save date -- was brimming with emotional energy from the past attitudes I had while creating it. I had to post it as is, just on a whim... Sometimes it occurs to me for a little while, all of what happened... All of the hope I had, even however lofty or mismanaged; so much marvelous anticipation for richly fulfilling experiences & deeper communicative connections with life... Being tremendously inspired... Being afraid & reliant, but also in love, & overwhelmingly INSPIRED.

I wish that that had not been taken away from me... I cried so many times, wishing for more.

What makes me rather sad is that I know I tried extremely, extremely hard. I also was provided excellent opportunities to be emotionally nurtured & to recognize the value of compassion & intimacy. I had a wonderful time, & still got hurt so badly... Everything considered, looking back, it seems so disheartening...

Like I kept on forgiving, smiling, being strong, thinking it was all going to be okay... I kept on going &  thinking well of myself for being proud...

I don't even remember what it's like anymore... I only manage to remember THAT on rare occasion, now.

I miss my old life... I keep forgetting. It keeps getting worse, & I forget, then forgive it... But sometimes I can reconnect to that distant state of bliss through memory of my childhood attitudes of musical inspiration...

I just can't believe what happened... It hurts too fucking bad...
I don't like what  happened. I wasn't able to respect it. 

I wish that I could stop disrespecting it. I don't understand what to do... How could it have been so beautiful? I can't even associate to it well enough, anymore. 

The faith I had in my own imagination when I was much younger, that must have been it. The motivation to be inspired with more childish finesse must probably come from faith; faith in that there would be greater value in making such an effort, & that you'd not be made a mockery of for these otherwise pettier interests...

Getting the fill more subtly. Wiser. Being reckless is too upsetting.

Once you get uncomfortable it's harder to remain inspired to recognize the finer values; wastefulness ensues.

Must be. From finest of all to most, of all, crude; all of them exhausting life by however much.

But the feelings I recall, of my more cherished experiences with emotional inspiration, being most of all valuable to me came from the inspirations of childish, pure, almost effortless, FINESSE. 

I remember the times where I was able to momentarily recognize the depth of the value that is in the intention of such an organized & uninterrupted existence. Be gratefully inspired. I must remember to use my emotions like this...

WhirlER

S illy
L ittle
E lf
E hh...
P issing
I s
N ot
G ood...
!



SLEEPING!

A literal Explosion

what a long, long time ago. Never thought the future was so bleak. Such a grueling challenge. Wow, honestly.

Piano Chords

Gentle Emotional Riveting Banger, Insert Lyrics...
(acronyms meng)

Whisper ChrisTmas

felt inspired to upload this, I like the way this oldie sounds

Feint by Dawn

very rough, but spunky.. it has spunk, kid. take it or leave. Mom's spagghetti..

lucabaar1

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