While i was chatting with this person i got inspiration to tell it how it is. SO HERE IT IS!

~

- Prologue -

Me: "everything on me smells like you, just like my bed and pretty much my whole room"

Her: "sorry"

Me: "its the best thing ever 

Her: Besides me and you ofc

----
But there are still traces of all those people in all the places 
in my memories they have faded, still i feel their presence every day
i am jaded
promises for new things seem like ragged threads from a worn out flag
repeatedly burned as i carry it for way too long in my head
people stay the same yet change is a deadly fact
i guess my heart is outdated, but i won't put it to rest

fragile as i may be, held back by ghosts from the past
future images seem empty as i sit here on my bed
the pain and hope i feel combined is a receipe for the dead
cause there aint no rest for the wicked, as there is no good for the bad

like my dad, he said
i slit my wrist when i was young and sad
and how his life did not come to an end
and how he lived, i cannot comprehend

i thought i should keep my head up and allow the worst to come
you never know what's coming so you'd better make it fun
there's no playing together if there is no one
but i was always doomed to lose myself, after i've lost everyone

so it's about the songs we sing when a new day starts
it's their reality, for me it's painfully harsh
i'm distant while i'm near, that's only just a part
i no longer hear voices who are reaching for my heart
wishing on the life i lead for me to stop falling apart
that's the last of it, while this scent descends onto where i will not ascent nor depart

-mindless humming-

thank you

Jaded

Hey all, this one i wrote/recorded about 6 months back, and i decided to finally upload it. Enjoy! x]

Lyrics:

every time i write a rap it stinks like garbage
every time i sound bad, it’s a carnage
we bleed for the love we all need to be in charge of
but loving yourself bring more pain. than it’s harmless

it’s in the mistakes i make, judgement clouded
a hundred-man army couldn t make me down shit
restlessly i shake my head, off killers and clowns, see
parasites ate my brain and my shell is just like.  wowsie!

wow, see, every time i rap it sounds like nauseas
cuz i’m SICK of all the bullshit and the cautious
everyone know’s that that shits atrocious
to speak the truth is what i live for, i VOW it

i could go to the store and buy some flowers
thought caring would change owsies into something ours
while i’m at it, let me spit some fuckin vowels
its about the damn minutes, not about the hours

i’m high on dope, too fly to joke
my fucking friend is a fucking dinosaur
I CAN’T BREATHE, - breathe-  , count this
growing weak like a bitch, account this!

YOU’LL SEE through the day TO KNOW who brings us ours
take action or be a coward
set your mind to fucking fail or lose your powers
just watch me as casually devour 
feast on lost souls in the after-hours
get that fake smile off if you’re sour
listen you dirty mothersfuckers! take a shower!!
The volumes MAxed out but my lyrics are still louder..

RAPA(PARASITES)

Lyrics:

Big boulders 
put them on your shoulders
everyone knows that's where they go ah
but when you carry them around 
everyone can see that they aint the one provound
its me

im hard like the rock you havent seen
hard like crack recipe
follow me excessively
aint need no melody
got this down like any G 
fingering her belly seeds
banging a bitch off of the street
got too much energy

imma bring in, right onto the cage
imma give it to ya in any place
aint no one out there 
getting it like me aye!

so we rockin'; 
rockin'
rockin'
gettin' blazed!
smoke smoke smoke gettin shitfaced

*gibberish*  :)

Maarten Scheffer