Broadway Metal.

Lyrics:

Stomach rumbles
I've been working hard
Money tumbles
I raid the coin jar 

Going to get some takeaway 
Indian food 
There'll be no dismay
It's going to be good! 

Indian food! 
You're calling to me.
Indian food! 
Get in my belly.

I'm going to eat you
Covered in sauce
My tongue will defeat you
No matter the chilli cost

My order comes
Hot and delicious 
But that chili feeling 
In my mouth is vicious 
 
(Indian food)

(Indian food)

Butter Chicken, rich and deep,
Served with naan at my seat
Biryani bold, with saffron threads,
Aromatic rice, marinated spreads.
Chole Bhature, fluffy and grand,
With chickpeas spicy, in my hand
Masala Dosa, crisp and gold,
Potato filling, flavours bold.
Rogan Josh, with tender meat,
A Kashmiri dish that's hard to beat.

Chicken Korma, creamy stew,
Mildly spiced with yoghurt too.
Lamb Vindaloo, fiery heat,
Chilli tang and vinegar meet.
Pani Puri, crisp delight,
Bursting flavour in each bite.
Malai Kofta, soft and round,
In cashew gravy, deeply browned.
Idli soft and coconut paired,
With sambhar spice so well prepared!!!!!!!!!!!

(Indian food!)
I'M GOING TO EAT YOU!!!!!
(Indian food!)
COVERED IN SAUCE!!!!!!!
(Indian food!)
MY TONGUE WILL DEFEAT YOU!!!!
(Indian food!)
NO MATTER THE CHILLI COST!!!!!!!!

INDIAN FOOD!

I'm going to eat you
Covered in sauce
My tongue will defeat you.
No matter the chilli cost


Indian Food

Symphonic Death Metal 

Lyrics:

"Hark! yea good and gentle throng

Listen well and nod along 

Of Shakespeare's works I now speak"

His tongue did turneth to beat. Beat. Beat. Beat. Beat. Beat. Beat. Beat. Beat. Beat.....

Each line a title.
Each title a thread,
From love to blood, from crown to dread.

The Bard’s full works in rhythm align
A sonnet of ages - Bound in pages.
Wrapped in time - Bonded in rhyme!

Love’s Labour’s Lost - I’m feelin’ the cost
Two Gentlemen of Verona - Lines gettin’ crossed
A Midsummer Night’s Dream - Floatin’ supreme
As You Like It - rhymes tight, love every scene

All’s Well That Ends Well - gives me a thrill
The Tempest rolls - I can’t sit still
Much Ado About Nothing - I feel alive
Measure for Measure - I’m feelin’ a jive 
The Taming of the Shrew - a fantastic show
Twelfth Night shines bright and steals my soul

The Merchant of Venice - Characters gold
The Comedy of Errors - Stories are bold
The Winter’s Tale - watched in cold moonlight 
Shakespeare's words - a true delight
Characters like Cymbeline - clean, with royal lean
Troilus and Cressida - in unresolved ending - tragic scene
Timon of Athens - he lost life's game
And Julius Caesar - remember his name!

All’s Well That Ends Well - gives me a thrill
The Tempest rolls - I can’t sit still
Much Ado About Nothing - I feel alive
Measure for Measure - I’m feelin’ a jive 
The Taming of the Shrew - a fantastic show
Twelfth Night shines bright and steals my soul

Othello’s in shadow - Macbeth haunted with bloody blade
Hamlet gone mad - but I'm not afraid
King Lear shed tears - crown on the floor
Harmony rises like The Phoenix and the Turtle - hardcore!
The Sonnets echo - my soul on display
The Two Noble Kinsmen - ride through the fray
This stage is his kingdom - the pen is his throne
Shakespeare, the Bard, he set a classic tone

All’s Well That Ends Well - gives me a thrill
The Tempest rolls - I can’t sit still
Much Ado About Nothing - I feel alive
Measure for Measure - I’m feelin’ a jive 
The Taming of the Shrew - a fantastic show
Twelfth Night shines bright and steals my soul

All’s Well That Ends Well - gives me a thrill!!!
The Tempest rolls - I can’t sit still
Much Ado About Nothing - I feel alive!!!
Measure for Measure - I’m feelin’ a jive 
The Taming of the Shrew - a fantastic show!!!
Twelfth Night shines bright and steals my soul!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Twelfth Night shines bright and steals my soul!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Twelfth Night Shines

Yodel metal.

Lyrics: 

Yodel ladel Yodel ladel Yodel ladel he hoo

One day I was yodeling by pretty shore
A pretty lass came to me, never seen her before
We got to talking into the night about topics obscure, in candlelight 
By the morning we had talked until throats were sore, and we got to the topic of topical cures.

I had a rash that caused me some pain 
Particularly when it started to rain
She knew an epic fable, of a yodeling ladle, that could cure my itching vein

Yodel ladel Yodel ladel Yodel ladel he hoo

I went to sea to find that ladle
I travelled far
I went every damn port
I went to every bar

People thought that I was mad
That ladle didn't exist
By people can kiss my arse 
And the space betwixt!

"I'm going to find that yodeling ladle"

Yodel ladel Yodel ladel Yodel ladel he hoo

Then one day in Switzerland, where I'd never searched before
I came across an old man, who showed me to his door
We sat right down, he stared at me, not a single word said
He reached behind his back and pointed at his bed

The yodeling ladle sat right there 
In a place of pride
On bedside shelf, next to some hair
The ladle was swaying side to side.

And it sang:

Yodel ladel Yodel ladel Yodel ladel he hoo

Yodel ladle (co-created with @Gia)

Reggae metal 

Lyrics:

Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooohh!!!!!!!!

Captain 
El Diablo de la Melena Magnífica
That's my name, nice to meet ya
Scourge of the Caribbean air
I got great hair
You're allowed to stare...

You were quietly sailin'
Your ship fully laden
My pirates took your ship with ease
Your crews on their knees

Now before you die
I'm going to try 
To fill you in 
On who did you in

So take it as a win.

I'M!: the pirate with great hair
That makes you shit your underwear 
Captain 
El Diablo de la Melena Magnífica
Magnificent hair blowing free
As I carve my name in history 

I'm not in it for the money
No need for jewels and honey
Even fame gets old, when the day is done
I'm just in it for the fun

Why care about money?
It's easy to get.
I steal from children
Even steal their tea set

Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!! 

(Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!)

"Let me tell you who you're dealing with":

[Spoken]
"My crew was once raiding a colony. We were soooo drunk.

We come across this old man, in clear distress. He only had one leg. Where the other should be there was a beautifully carved peg leg....

I have two legs, as you can see. I had no need for his gorgeously carved leg.....

But it was VERY gorgeous........

So I took it. Screw that idiota.........

I'm not a nice guy.

[Bridge]
The pirate with great hair
That makes you shit your underwear 
Captain 
El Diablo de la Melena Magnífica
Magnificent hair blowing free
As I carve my name in history!!!

I'M!: the pirate with great hair
That makes you shit your underwear 
Captain 
El Diablo de la Melena Magnífica
Magnificent hair blowing free
As I carve my name in history 

Captain.
El Diablo de la Melena Magnífica.

Know you know something about me.
Magnificent hair. Right!



Captain El Diablo de la Melena Magnífica

Electronic Broadway Power Metal.

Lyrics:

Flying free, over home
A beautiful way, to be alone

The Last Dragon am I
Flying in the sky

Flap.

Flap. Flap. 

(Flap, flap, flap)

If you're new to town
Just look around 
People go about their day
Not getting in my way

If you're worried when I fly by:
My neighbours think I'm a pretty chill guy!!!!!!

I'm the last Dragon
My kin are all gone
So raise your flagon
While I sing this song!

[Chorus]
The Last Dragon doesn't give a shit
About your petty problems, I've just quit
You killed everyone that I knew 
All I have left is this song and a comfortable cave, please never come along.
Or I may misbehave.

FLAP! FLAP! FLAP! 

(Flap, flap, flap, flap, flap, flap)

I live in a Bachelor's Cave
I don't aim to misbehave
I'm not even angry
That you killed my whole family 
I NEVER LIKED THEM ANYWAY!!!!!

[Chorus]
The Last Dragon doesn't give a shit
About your petty problems, I've just quit
You killed everyone that I knew 
All I have left is this song and a comfortable cave, please never come along.
Or I may misbehave.

FLAP! FLAP! 

(Flap, flap, flap)

(Flap, flap, flap)

Flapping wings
Overhead 
If I wanted you dead, you'd be dead
But now I, eat sheep instead 
So you can feel safe in your bed

I now know eating you is wrong
And with this happy song
We can forget about how tasty you are....

I used to snack on you like candy bars.....

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

Oh....yes....

(**Cough**)

"And hey. I like, feel really bad about that.....

If you want to talk about it, just remember:".....

FLAP! FLAP! FLAP! 

[Outro]
The Last Dragon doesn't give a shit
About your petty problems, I've just quit
You killed everyone that I knew 
All I have left is this song and a comfortable cave, please never come along.
Or I may misbehave.

(Flap, flap, flap)


The Last Dragon

From BDSM-The Musical

Blues metal.

Lyrics: 

Crystal sits at the bar
Staring at her phone
She feels you shuffle over 
She gives a little moan 

She danced this dance before 
Sung this song too many times
Your advances are ignored
All you get is a sigh

Crystal doesn't want to know you 
Doesn't want to smell you
Doesn't care if you're nice
Doesn't want you to care for her
To love her
To hold her tight
She doesn't want to get to know you 
She's not up for a fight
Just wants a drink
Alone tonight

Leave Crystal alone.

Crystal sits at the bar
Staring at her phone
You've shuffled over 
Given your little little moan 

You've danced this dance before 
Sung this song too many times
Your advances still ignored
Just leave with your sigh

Crystal doesn't want to know you 
Doesn't want to smell you
Doesn't care if you're nice
Doesn't want you to care for her
To love her
To hold her tight
She doesn't want to get to know you 
She's not up for a fight
Just wants a drink
Alone tonight

Leave Crystal alone.

Crystal sits at the bar
Staring at her phone
You've shuffled over 
Given your little little little moan 

You've danced this dance before 
Sung this song too many times
Your advances still ignored
Just leave with your sigh!!!!!

Crystal doesn't want to know you !
Doesn't want to smell you!
Doesn't care if you're nice!
Doesn't want you to care for her!
To love her!
To hold her tight!
She doesn't want to get to know you!
She's not up for a fight!
Just wants a drink!
Alone tonight!

Leave Crystal alone!!!

Crystal sits at the bar
Staring at her phone
You've shuffled over 
Given your little little little little little moan 

You've danced this dance before 
Sung this song too many times
Your advances still ignored
Just leave with your sigh!!!!!

Crystal doesn't want to know you !
Doesn't want to smell you!
Doesn't care if you're nice!
Doesn't want you to care for her!
To love her!
To hold her tight!
She doesn't want to get to know you!
She's not up for a fight!
Just wants a drink!
Alone tonight!

Leave Crystal alone!!!

Leave Crystal alone

WARNING NSFW

Broadway 

Lyrics [intro]
I'm just a simple lad
Sex I've never had
I'm from a small town, far away
But in the city I've come to stay
And find my way!

[Verse 1]
I'm 21, I'm up for fun
But I don't know where to go
So I talked to everyone 
To learn what they know 

I learned quickly there's good people and bad
And with the right people lots of fun to be had
I started exploring my unique kinks
I was meeting with furries, cucks, and twinks

"And I found:"

[Chorus]
I like B.D.S.M.
With any he, she, they, them
It's not a sin to like a smack
You can do it to me with a bat!

One thing led to another 
I explored more
Father said I was a sinner
Mother called me a whore

I didn't let that bother me
Not one bit
Not hard to be bothered when you like eating sh**

I have kinks galore 
I adore
So many things 
Involving piercings and rings.

"And I found:"

[Chorus]
I like impact play 
I'll take it any day
It's not a sin to like a smack
You can do it to me with a bat!

This is the beginning of my journey
I'm going to buckle in
My arse is a little burn-ee
But it feels like a win

[Outro]
So remember folks when you think of BDSM
It doesn't have to be scary
Unless that turns on you and them, and them, and them, and then, and them

BDSM-The Musical (NSFW)

EDM.

Lyrics:

We walk into the club
The sounds pound
Eardrums bursting 
Lights flash all around

The feeling is electric 
The crowd hectic
The DJ above the floor
His sick beats soar 

"Hold the door!!"

THAT'S HODOR

(Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor!)

Hodor 

The DJ is Hodor.

It's Kristian Nairn
His face calm
His beats like a psalm
Melody in his palm 

The beat start rising
Lights mesmerising
It's so exciting 
Dance floor looks enticing

He opens the door
To fantastic allure
That DJ!:

IT'S HODOR!

[outro]
(Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor! Hodor!)

DJ Hodor

WARNING: NSFW

Broadway Electronic Metal 

Lyrics:

I walk into the nightclub 
The music is so loud
I don't want to be in this nightclub 
But my friends would not be proud...

If I left!!

Left.

Left 

Left

This fucking Nightclub......

I'm in my fucking forties 
The atmosphere is dark
I can't see for shit 
Left my glasses in the car

The air is hot and steamy
I really want a drink
But 15 dollar bottles of water?!
I'd rather drink from the sink

[Chorus]
I'm too old for this nightclub 
It wasn't built for me
My back is crippled, my hearing is gone 
I've got a dodgy knee!

Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night.  Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. 
Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. 

I want to walk out of this nightclub 
But my friends would not be proud...

The music is so loud!. 

LOUD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!

THIS FUCKING NIGHTCLUB!!!!!!!!

[Bridge]
The dance floors pumping
Speakers thumping
The crowd is jumping
Heartbeats whumping
Somebody's talking 
I'm not hearing
They're offended
("Why ain't you listening)

(Ahhhhhhhhh)

I go to the bathroom 
There's hundreds there
People laughing 
Brushing hair

The seats are wet
The sink stinks
I can't stay here
I'm on the brink!!!!!

[Chorus]
I'm too old for this nightclub (nightclub)
It wasn't built for me
Bursitis acting up, I'm going to throw up
There goes my dodgy knee!

So no more nightclubs for me
No more toilets smelling like pee 
Of nightclubs I am free!!!!!!

[Outro, fade]
No more nightclubs for me!

Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. 
Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. 

Too old for this nightclub (NSFW)

WARNING: NSFW

From BDSM-The Musical 

Lyrics:

It's been six months now since I came to the city
The people are fun, the sights are all pretty 
While dating has been hard, up my sleeve I've got a card
I'm going on a app called The Wonderful Dating Bard

The app is free, so they say
But if you want to be found you have to pay

[Chorus]
It's The Wonderful Dating Bard app
An app made for kinks
The Wonderful Dating Bard app
They've got hetero, cucks and twinks

The Wonderful Dating Bard app
Has really saved my day
I've had lots of sex
But no romance has come my way

I've been on many dates 
I've met people galore 
I've tried so many kinks
I'm going to try more

But all I really want is someone to hold
Someone who'll tie me down
And penetrate me to my soul!

"I wonder if I'll find some nice, wholesome, take-home-to-your-parents kind of person..."

"Who'll then ramrod me hard in a parking lot on the way home.....

"While a crowd watches"....

Oh yeah.....

Surely my soulmate is on:

[Chorus]
The Wonderful Dating Bard app
An app made for kinks
The Wonderful Dating Bard app
They've got hetero, furries, and twinks

The Wonderful Dating Bard app
Has really saved my day
I've had lots of sex
But no romance has come my way

I've had lots of sex
But no romance has come my way

The Wonderful Dating Bard app (NSFW)

From BDSM-The Musical.

Lyrics:

I met a girl named Crystal 
She was sitting at the bar
I saw her on her phone
She was smiling from afar

I swear our eyes locked for a bit
So I went over slow 
I wanted to give her pause to think
"This guy really steals the show!"

[Chorus]
Crystal, oh Crystal, the woman for me
Crystal, oh Crystal let's set each other free
I really want to know you, have you, make you moan
But Crystal, oh Crystal, you won't get off the phone 

She finally puts down her phone
With a little moan
She starts talking to me
I let my charm run free

She freely listens with great care
She slowly twirls her hair
She obviously wants me
Of this I swear

It's all a game, her rejection just a show 

[Chorus]
Crystal, oh Crystal, the woman for me
Crystal, oh Crystal let's set each other free
I really want to know you, have you, make you moan
But Crystal, oh Crystal, you won't get off the phone 

"How you doing?".....

I was wrong, she didn't want me
I left with a sigh
Why doesn't she want me
I'm a kinky guy!

[Chorus]
Crystal, oh Crystal, the woman for me
Crystal, oh Crystal let's set each other free
I really want to know you, have you, make you moan
But Crystal, oh Crystal, you won't get off the phone 

"Damn"......

[Outro]
Why did she lead me on
I really want to know
Crystal, oh Crystal you've dealt my heart a blow.

Crystal, oh Crystal

WARNING: NSFW

From BDSM-The Musical 

Lyrics:

I've lived in this city all my life
I've tasted it's pleasures and spice 
Now I'm feel I'm getting into strife 
I'm looking for love but don't want to just be a wife 

I'm educated, I'm fun
I take it up the bum
But I only seem to find scum 
Dating has got me on the run

[Chorus]
Just because I'm looking
Doesn't mean I'm looking for them
They really think they're cooking 
But they can't heat up this hen

Sometimes I just want to be alone
Just sit at the bar
Doom scrolling my only pleasure 
But I never get far

There's always someone talking to me
It really isn't fair
I try to be polite
When I'm nervous I twirl my hair

[Chorus]
Just because I'm looking
Doesn't mean I'm looking for them
They really think they're cooking 
But they can't heat up this hen

All I really want is a guy who likes a slap
Somebody who'll ravage me
And then have a nice chat

I want to break in my strap-on 
With a guy I can really please
I just want a big strong guy
Right down on his knees

[Chorus]
Just because I'm looking
Doesn't mean I'm looking for them
They really think they're cooking 
But they can't heat up this hen

[Outro]
They really think they're cooking 
But they can't heat up this hen


Just because I'm looking

WARNING: NSFW

From BDSM-The Musical 

Lyrics:

It's been 20 years
We've dated on and off
We've done things to each other
Things wonderful and rough

But now we're both tired
Our lust has nearly expired 
20 years of screwing around 
Our arseholes are no longer round

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

(Dating sucks, sex is good
Rectal prolapse, misunderstood 
Spanking people, being spanked
But it's not the same without romance)

"So in the club we'll look for love"

[Chorus]
We're going to the night club
Nightclub
We're going to last all night
Going to the nightclub
Nightclub
It's going to be alright   

Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. 

Club.

It's been 20 years
We're going out clubbing 
Now I hope we don't end up sobbing 
It's going to be fun
I'll have to suck in my tum

(Maybe there's romance there
I remember it used to be great
Thumping beats, sweaty bodies
I hope this isn't a mistake)

[Chorus]
We're going to the night club
Nightclub
We're going to last all night
Going to the nightclub
Nightclub
It's going to be alright 

Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. 

Club.

Maybe we should just talk more 
There's lots to be said
Because if we don't talk more
We should put this relationship to bed 

(In bed we're so compatible 
You roger me hard 
But when it comes to talking 
Our relationship is scarred)

It'll either fix our relationship, or we'll find someone else. 

So, I guess that:

[Outro]
We're going to the night club
Nightclub
We're going to last all night
Going to the nightclub
Nightclub
It's going to be alright 

It's going to be alright 

Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night. Night.

Club  


Going to the nightclub

The Ringmaster

WARNING: NSFW
From BDSM-The Musical 

Lyrics:

"Oi!!!! Ticket.... please"...

(**Cough**)

"Um"...

"Yes, that all seems in order"....

"Do enter"....

Welcome to the Clown Show 
We've sights you won't believe 
Welcome to the Clown Show
Now get down on your knees

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh!!!!

HaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHa!!!

Welcome to the Clown Show
We've got lots of fun
Feathers for tickling 
Butt-Plugs for your bum

[Chorus]
Welcome to the Clown Show
We've entertainment galore
See our pole dancers
Watch as they soar

The Clown Show, The Clown Show
It's where you go
The Clown Show, The Clown Show
Anywhere else is dull

So why are you here? I hear you say.
A clown gave you a ticket to this wonderful soiree 
She seeks out people who look a little sad
But at sex, she knows they're not bad

So now you're here, you might as well stay
We've got a dancer coming up who can really sway
So shimmy over to the bar
As I introduce Crystal, our star

("She's beautiful.....")

Welcome to the Clown Show
We've entertainment galore
See our pole dancers
Watch as they soar

The Clown Show, The Clown Show
It's where you go
The Clown Show, The Clown Show
Anywhere else is dull

"So, think you'll hang around?"

("What time does Crystal get off?")

"Honey, Crystal gets off whenever she wants!"

"Good luck getting her attention".

The Clown Show

WARNING: NSFW

From BDSM-The Musical 

Lyrics:

This dating app sucks
I've wasted my bucks
Too much time
Spent on chasing behind

This app was meant to fix everything 
But all it's done is given me a sting
I went on it looking for some honey 
But all its done is waste my money 

Don't get me wrong, the sex is great
But if all I wanted was to get off I'd masturbate 
I just want someone who is sweet and kind
Who also likes to stick things in my behind 

[Chorus]
The wonderful bard dating app
I now hate you
You gave me everything I asked for
You even found someone to give me poo

But now we're through
I'm deleting you
I'll find my romance
And I'll be eating poo too

Dating is so hard
And so am I
Why is dating so hard? 
I'm a kinky guy

I've gone to orgies
I've swung a bit
I've been spanked 
I've even eaten sh**

I've laughed, I've licked
In my balls I've been kicked 
But I've never felt a spark
It's like being blown in the dark

[Chorus]
The wonderful bard dating app
I now hate you
You gave me everything I asked for
You even found someone to give me poo

But now we're through
I'm deleting you
I'll find my romance
And I'll be eating poo too

My last match was particularly weird
She was some sort of mime, with bunny ears
We met in a dark alley
It was uncanny 
I was worried it would be my finale.....

She handed me a ticket that said
Don't go to bed.
The Clown Show begins at 10
Be timely 
Dress finely
And wisely 
Don't tell anyone else of this address

I'd rather face peril
Than this dating app devil
My loins start to churn
I've semen to burn 
To the app I'll never return

[Chorus]
The wonderful bard dating app
I now hate you
You gave me everything I asked for
You even found someone to give me poo

But now we're through
I'm deleting you
I'll find my romance
And I'll be eating poo too

I've eaten arses
I've pierced a tit
The Clown Show doesn't scary
Maybe there will be someone I'll marry!

The Clown Show, The Clown Show, I'm going to the Clown Show.

The Clown Show, The Clown Show, I'm going to the Clown Show.


I'm deleting you

Comedy metal.

Lyrics:

Dear creator of initialism: N.S.F.W.
You've saved my arse many times
Dear creator of N.S.F.W
I'd like to thank you 
With rhymes.

When I'm at work, regularly 
A friend sends videos to me
They're often rated G
But some videos are R consistency 

My friend isn't dumb
Rude videos unknown: none
N.S.F.W. labelling on every one
So he doesn't spoil my fun 

Dear creator of initialism: N.S.F.W.
You've saved my arse, many times
Dear creator of N.S.F.W.
I'd like to thank you 
With rhymes.

I imagine the horror on colleague's faces
If they saw these videos they'd be locked in stasis 
Jaws would drop
Heads would roll
I'd be fired from the shop
I'd take a heavy toll

My colleagues are pretty dull

Dear creator of initialism: N.S.F.W.
You've saved my arse, many times
Dear creator of N.S.F.W.
I'd like to thank you 
With rhymes.

Dear creator of initialism: N.S.F.W.
You've saved my arse, many times
Dear creator of N.S.F.W.
Just know that I thank you, every, damn, time 



Dear creator of NSFW

Kawaii metal 

Lyrics:

Woof.

I was out running alone one night
When from out of sight
Came a man who looked a fright
It caused me delight

The man looked kind of wrong
And he smelled really strong
He was only wearing a thong
I didn't think we'd get along

So when he got in tight
He got a nasty fright
I'm a werewolf, and I like to bite

I'm a werewolf!
I change at will
I'm not a moonlight shill
I grow big claws, teeth and fur 
And biting people, I adore

WOOF! WOOF!

WOOF! WOOF! WOOF!

I changed in front of him
I didn't make a sound
He looked frightened 
He looked around

I grabbed his nearest limb
Twisted with a grin
I bit down
His arm hit the ground

He screamed
I roared
Our heartbeats soared!!!!!!

I'm a werewolf!
I change at will
I'm not a moonlight shill
I grow big claws, teeth and fur 
And biting people, I adore

WOOF! WOOF!

WOOF! WOOF! WOOF!

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I knew he'd be fine
I did this all the time
The taste is divine 
It's like a fine wine

Tomorrow when he wakes
He'll think it was a mistake 
His arm's whole, no fake
He'll think he was really baked.

But tomorrow he'll hear my call 
And run out the door
We'll be together for ever more
Or until he becomes a bore

I'm a werewolf!
I change at will
I'm not a moonlight shill
I grow big claws, teeth and fur 
And biting people, I adore

WOOF! WOOF!

WOOF! WOOF! WOOF!

I'm a werewolf

Power metal.

Lyrics:

Repunzal with her golden hair
Stood sadly at the window with wooden stare
Her hair a massive plume
It's length filling half the room

She had been brought here as a baby
This tower so tall
Trapped here by an evil lady
Who harvested the hair in a yearly haul 

Rapunzel's hair was a powerful drug
Worth a lot on the streets 
It also gave her crippling pain
And left her crying on her sheets

Rapunzel, Rapunzel 
Your neck and scalp are on fire
Repunzel, Repunzel 
Your patience has begun to tire

Rapunzel, Rapunzel 
You'll soon feel glee
Repunzel, Repunzel 
You will soon be free

At 15 Repunzel couldn't stand it anymore
She leaped at the lady and out her throat she tore

She cut her hair 
She climbed down
She ran away
To a distant town

She sold her hair
She made bucks
Killed people here and there
Without giving any [****]

She took control of local mobs
Treated them well, gave them good jobs
Started a new life
Trying to put away previous strife

Rapunzel, Rapunzel 
Your neck and scalp are on fire
Repunzel, Repunzel 
Your body has begun to tire

Rapunzel, Rapunzel 
Do you now feel glee
Repunzel, Repunzel 
Now that you're free

Repunzel died at 23
From medical complications 
She lived her life in agony 
Without access to modern medications

Her corpse was stolen
Her hair shaved off
No longer golden
No longer soft

Rapunzel

EDM Metal Comedy 

Lyrics:

In forests dark where small things crawl
Where brush and pine grow thick and tall
An old witch sits in a house alone
A house with chicken legs and walls made of stone.

She peers through smoke, eyes bright as coal
And snarls the name that scars her soul
The thought of him makes her sick
That thrice-cursed, cold-hearted, John the Wick.

[Chorus]
Oh, the Baba Yaga Saga (SAGA! SAGA!)
Told in whispers near and far,
Of a witch and assassin of legend,
And their quick and deadly war.

“He stole my name!” Baba Yaga did cry
A ferocious look in her eye
"I'll strike him down. He can't flee."
"I'll remove that man from history."

"I caved in skulls before he wore suits"
"I hexed men's blood and cursed their roots!”
“They call him ‘Boogeyman’, what rot!"
"Without his weapons he's not worth snot"

[Aside]
"And she always knew the current market value of snot."

(Saga. Saga.Baba Yaga Saga. Saga. Saga. Baba Yaga Saga. Saga. Saga. Baba Yaga Saga. Saga. Saga. Baba Yaga Saga.)

[Chorus]
Oh, the Baba Yaga Saga (SAGA! SAGA!)
Told in whispers near and far,
Of a witch and assassin of legend,
And their quick and deadly war.

She brewed a spell with wrathful tears
She summoned wolves with fangs like spears.
“Go get him" she yelled, "Make that prick bleed"
On his flesh you will feed.

Through neon streets and silence grim
She sent her wolves to attack him
But Wick was ready, movements calm and slow
He killed the wolves in one blow

He tracked her down
With studied frown
He found her lair
He laid her bare

He killed Baba Yaga with a fountain pen
She’d eaten kings and cursed their men
But 1 hour after attacking John the Wick
Baba Yaga died by writing stick

[Chorus]
Oh, the Baba Yaga Saga (SAGA! SAGA!)
Told in whispers near and far,
Of a witch and assassin of legend,
And their quick and deadly war.

[Outro]
Oh, the Baba Yaga Saga (SAGA! SAGA!)
Told in whispers near and far,
Of a witch and assassin of legend,
And their quick and deadly war.

The Baba Yaga Saga

Oishii! (Instrumental)

EDM Metal 

Lyrics:

Oh gather ‘round, you weary souls, I’ll tell a tale that's fully sick. A tale of our mighty hero, the incredible John the Wick. 

John lived alone, peace intact, not wanting a fight. But then one night vampires attacked, killing with delight.

They crept in silence with light steps, they were pale and thin. They wanted violence while John slept, the damn dog let them in. 

They destroyed the fish bowl, they crushed the life of John's pet. That fish was dear to his soul. He'd won it in a bet.

"John the Wick rode out for revenge that very night."


Ride, ride, John the Wick, through dark and through storm. With silvered pencil of sharpened wood, to make the vamps forlorn

They killed your goldfish, no longer to swim. No-one shall weep for the vamps, when Wick does them in.

From grave to grave, from crypt to crypt, he tracked them, eyes bright. Through streets and woods, until job done. He won every fight. 

He staked the first vampire in back alley. The second he staked at the port. The third got added to John's death tally, now only the Vampire Master was to be fought.

Ride, ride, John the Wick, through dark and through storm. With silvered pencil of sharpened wood, to make the vamps forlorn

They killed your goldfish, no longer to swim. No-one shall weep for the vamps, when Wick does them in.

The master hid in marble tomb, where dust of centuries lay. But John the Wick just lit up the room and burned the night away. 

And when fire had turned to ash, he whispered low and true. “You killed my favourite goldfish, now I'm going to kill you.”

John killed the master with his pencil.
He did it artistically.
He then drew a really good stencil.
He hung it for all to see.

In the local library.
With note promissory 
Death follows all who won't let my pets be!

Ride, ride, John the Wick, through dark and through storm
With silvered pencil of sharpened wood, to make the vamps forlorn
They killed your goldfish, no longer to swim
No-one shall weep for the vamps, when Wick does them in.

Ride, ride, John the Wick, through dark and through storm
With silvered pencil of sharpened wood, to make the vamps forlorn
They killed your goldfish, no longer to swim
No-one shall weep for the vamps, when Wick does them in., when Wick does them in.




Wick vs Vampires

EDM Metal 

Lyrics:

[Prologue, Spoken]
"In the Year of our Lord: twenty-thirty-six, mankind is under the bloodied paw of The Black Fang Pack."

"Werewolves and vicious overlords, The Black Fang Pack rules through fear, and blood."

"From the shadows rises a warrior of wrath…
His name… John! John The Wick.

When the moon shines it's full bright hue,
Howling beasts from every corner do spew.
They tore from John another last love.
When it comes to revenge, Wick never gives up.

Werewolves had eaten John's pet hamster
He wakes to the blood smear with a grrrrrrr!
He cleans up the blood and gets his gear 
He wonders why this happens every damn year.

Through rain and ash he strides alone,
His soul a storm, his eyes like stone.
No sword to swing, no gun to pop.
Just a silver-plated pencil, with pink eraser on top.

[Chorus]
Silver lead and midnight blood!
Wick is coming to get you good.
All evil shall kneel, the beasts shall weep.
For Wick has sworn their final sleep!

Wick versus werewolves!

(Werewolves. Werewolves, John. John. Wick.)

In caves where Werewolf families eyes shone bright,
John's vengeance burned with a fiercer light.
He killed the parents, he found the young
Tiny little puppies rolling in their dung

John thought "should I kill them, like that Anakin dude?"
But deep down he felt that was too rude
He raised those puppies as his own
He showed pictures to other parents, on his phone

[Chorus]
Silver lead and midnight blood!
Wick is coming to get you good.
All evil shall kneel, the beasts shall weep.
For Wick has sworn their final sleep!

Wick versus werewolves!

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

Those werewolf kids are really sweet
John comforts them when they weep
He guards them when they sleep
He finds the best cuts of meat.
His love is very deep.

Wick vs Werewolves

I am a lyricist. I make AI assisted music for fun.

Check out my in-draft musical on the playlist BDSM-The Musical. I'm slowly building the concept.

Magrov

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