Original Songs

This song is about my dog Larry, who, at his ripe old age of 14, has become a grumpy old man.

LYRICS:
You jump on my lap 
First thing in the morning 
You growl at your sister 
A menacing warning.

You can’t just surrender, 
Content with our love,
And share with your brood?

No, that might preclude the
Feud, rude attitude,
And mood you exude. 

You squeal for your meals
As if we will let you go unfed
And your testy best is expressed as you
Wrest your sisters from every bed.

I’ll bet you forget when you let people pet you every day.
But now not so much, as the most loving touch
You’ll perceive, so aggrieved, 
And scare us all away…

At the top of our walk down the block
You just stop and pull toward home
Denying your pining, whining talk 
I chalked up to desire to roam.

Despite all your push and your shove 
You are loved for who you are
Because before you I did not have a clue 
That a pooch could inhabit my heart,
In your waning years it appears that 
You are slowing down.
But keep being you - so you can live up to 
Your so well-earned reknown.

It's Larry's World

For a classroom teacher going through difficult times, support comes from an unexpected place.

LYRICS:
We’re sorry to hear what you’re going through 
And want to offer support
But while we can’t always be there with you
I have some good news to report

You have some friends in your classroom 
Who up to now have not expressed
How much they care, will always be there 
Whenever you get super stressed.
They’re right there on your wall, 
At your beck and call...

[CHORUS]
The parts of speech, the parts of speech, 
They’re glad to be part of what you teach. 
They owe you one, they have your back,
Especially when things are out of whack.

Oh, the parts of speech care about you,
They will never ever doubt you,
You’re helping students use them right, 
So they’re in your corner in every fight.

The nouns are here, appearing in person
In the place to be, ‘cause it’s their thing.
They’re gonna make darn sure that things don’t worsen, 
Both common and proper (the ones with the bling).
 
The verbs have heard a call to action
To ensure your utmost satisfaction.
They’ll do right by you, give you what you need, 
Go the extra mile and be all they can be.

[CHORUS]

And when you feel the need to scream or yelp, 
Interjections will all pitch in to help.
I just saw for, and, nor, but, or, yet, and so - 
The conjunctions are all present - I took roll.

The adverbs have arrived just now
To give you some love and tell you how.
The adjectives are here with just the right description 
To ease your mind, and remove the friction.

The prepositions have come with a message of fun
Just don’t get caught ending a sentence with one!
The pronouns are here for you,
But also for him, her, he, she, they, them, it and all of us, too.

Now Pony Boy, Piggy, and Atticus Finch, 
Would all lend a caring hand in a pinch, 
But while their feelings for you are strong, 
They’re just not the subject of this song...

[DOUBLE CHORUS]

The Parts Of Speech

A song was needed to describe the classroom ukulele curriculum I teach, so I wrote this.

G, C, E and A

I originally wrote this tune in 2019, and it got a reworking in 2022 with Jon Randall and Mark Rossi playing beautifully and adding a lot of new ideas to it. Thanks, Jon and Mark!

Poop Time For Clemmy

I was thinking about the current political division in the U.S. and this just popped out. Not deep, but to the point, I think. I wrote and recorded this on u-bass and electric ukulele initially, and then Chris Long played the final bass and piano parts.

I Am Right And You Are Wrong

This song was inspired by the TV show "Heartstopper" (musically and otherwise) and real-life events. I hope you enjoy it!

Original Songs

Mark Bernfield