Cape Cod Custody Battle Blues
Written By Dr. Eric Doberman, Performed by The Delusions (a.k.a. The National Speedball League)

Lyrics
Got a napkin in my glove box, got a shotgun in my trunk
I'm running low on Bacitracin, I am nearly out of junk

It's a custody battle, up on the outer Cape
I been drinking so much whiskey, I can feel my liver changing shape

When I was just a baby, my mother always said
Use a prophylactic. You don't want no little kid

It's a custody battle, up on the outer cape
I been drinking so much corn liquor, I can feel my liver changing shape

I'm gonna blow off Provincetown
I tell you this because
No antique lovin' homo's gonna ruin my party buzz

Guess what?
I shoot it in my fingers and in between my toes
And this is something every family court judge knows
I pulled in to a gift shop somewhere between Truro and Nauset
I was just so broke so dope sick, I pawned the bassinet
I had to pawn the baby's bassinet
I had to hock the bassinet
And I got myself a real bundle of joy.

This cop, he says "there's super dad".  I think it was in jest.
They're coming with Rottweilers to assist with my arrest.
They got those transactions on telephone tap tape

It's a custody battle, up on the outer cape
Outer Cape!

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this was a demo Black and Grey did in the mid 90's of

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Those of you with a love of labels (for yourself and your music) might call this one “north eastern USA alt country”.  Those (like us) who couldn’t give a rats ass about that can just call it a “god damn good tune”.  

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the Delusions were Eric Doberman (as himself), Matt Sandonato (as Tom Doberman), Doug MacDonald (as some clever nickname i forget) and Dan Shaw (as Diego).

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Lyrics:

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I can see an Eastern Star…

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