Beat: Lil Ugly Mayne
I hate myself so much

LIL UGLY FAT HOBGOBLIN- THE PISS FREESTYLE 1

Link to the beat: https://soundcloud.com/astro-shaman


I LEFT YOU AT THE BAR- MOMS AND $AstroShaman

there is a bare, desolate place 
where the sun dried grass bursts into smoke and flame
and there’s no water to parch unending thirst
i guess it’s something like a biblical curse
a plauge cast from ignorance and hate
and babe, it reflects the state 
of my mind —
i’ve
 been tryin to stay awake, alert and alive
in the constant flux of space and time
but i’ve been losing more than i win
been blown up in the hanger before i even begin

there’s a current, i’ve been swept away
there’s a pull, and i can’t say that i’ve been able
to stay
and my soul is a fleeting gasp of air
and my body is failing, loosing hair
losing sleep, losing reasons to keep
floating above water, struggle gainst the current
drowin in liqour, words keep slurring
drowin in self loathing, bad thoughts reoccurring
sucidal ideation, my moms is worrin

i feel close to an edge 
peerin into 
depths below
feel close to what it means to become unknown and unknow-
the human construct, the human consciousness
what makes me will fade someday into nothingness
do you hear the sirens? do you hear the drunks?
do you feel the lust? do you feel the love?
do you hear the sirens? do you hear the drunks?
do you feel the lust? do you feel the love?
do you?
Do you?
Do you?


DO YOU UNDERSTAND?? DO YOU? (Beat by WῌỊ₮Є ƁỊ₮Ͼῌ VỊØⱢ∆₮ØЯ)

A quick freestyle over Metal Finger's Charnsuka. 


DOOM FREESTYLE

Instrumental: Drake, From Time
Sample: Robin Williams

Lyrics

24 hours in a day, 60 seconds in an hour—
got the shakes in the shower, aint had booze in what, 12 hours?
spent the better half of the week on a bender cus the winter wind whips my bones
and i don’t want to know, i live to forget
and i live to smoke cigs and spit chunk of spit
on the black tar; live to pass out on couches and 
vomit in sinks pink like the wine i drink
but at the end of the night,
I’m alone, and I  know better
stop drinking so much,
 you ever seen dead man blush? i’ve never
seen an open casket, always been close, a dirty secret that you still know
and that I still store, stuff way down
in the dark place  underground
the dirty depths I drag you to
everytime you call and I don’t pick up you remember
that time I fucking threw myself off a roof
to escape all the bad thoughts 
never thought I was strong, never though I could hold on-
each 60 second tick of the clock goes by and another thought enters the abyss of the mind like hey, you, why the fuck you feel you aint supposed to die?
god’s up high and the devils down low each pull tries to convince my soul the way to go


24 hours seconds in a day 60 seconds in an hour
24 beers in a 24 i drink half a pack in two hours
12 beers till i don’t feel the pain that rocks my brain like a train—
church is empty, never kneeling on the pews
loosing all ambition to do good for you
loosing all ambiition, all the shit i used to love 
i don’t feel i deserve, i don’t deserve all the fun
bottles empty, trapped between the glass and you pound out my last drops
as I fall stumbling on my ass
can’t walk again yo you better call a cab
roll me on my side when I get home cus homie this is bad
a good night, a bad night, what’s the fucking difference
24 hours in a day to feel insignificant 

on my way to liquor store, snow’s up to my knees
down in my heart of hearts i know i’ll be dead by fucking 23
so if anyone asks what went wrong show them this song and move em along
cus i’ve never deserved anything less than death, it’s what I got coming 
you either change yourself for the better or crash and burn, i guess it’s funny
how it gets u in the grip and it don’t let go
soon i’ll be as white and lifeless as the piling banks of snow



BINGE

Chill ride, slow drive, mama’s in the kitchen, 
daddy’s at the counter fillin his prescription
man, I’m happy just to keep livin in the system
sisters on the lawn, floating through the air
grand ma meres counting cards, brother’s pullin out his hair
disfunction in the playhouse, house rules 
subtly spark minds rays of sunshine fluently
express the eloquent flourish of a last breath
just another victim of a lazy haphazard mind
just another ADD riddled kid trying to find
a place in the human race, a spot to bask in the sunny day
some way to express emotion in a postive way

I’ll keep on keepin on, paint myself as the villian
Keep on truckin, luckily I keep fucking
munchin on a lil’ special somethin somethin
yeah a little somethin sometin

where did the big voiced megaphone go?
Who’s tripin high, and who’s fallin low? 
Been around the country, looking for some love
but all I get is badges and dull voices, raw.
I’m bored, I think we all are – don’t have to look far
for dissaffected youths chokin on the truth
comin to grips with meaninglessness what it means to exist

yo, it’s phil. 101 son. Sister’s in her room
pettin her cat, fun. Brothers blowin smoke in his best friend’s garage. 
I’m sittin alone at the overpass, watchin cars
yo, it’s phil. 101 son. Sister’s in her room
pettin her cat, fun. Brothers blowin smoke in his best friend’s garage. 
I’m sittin alone at the overpass, watchin cars

who thought this through? not me, not you. I’m stumblin as I go along
and fight my own mind each rhyme I drop in the song
self hating always brought out the worst in me, time to close eyes and
sleep away the apathy
‘cus everytime i fade, you’re in my dreams. the way that you smell, 
each and every minute detail down to the hem of your dress,
the way the light traced your face before you went away

I’ll sing, if you want me to sing. A fossil
blue, smeared across the ancient sky. 
A country torn open, wide.
A country torn open, wide.

And with blood streaked across your head
and dried dirt caked in your hair,
I’ll take your matted memory. I’ll nestle it against my chest. 
I’ll coo over your plump baby. Lul the alone in you to a fitful sleep. 
Your secrets, mine to keep. Your secrets, mine to keep. 

Your secrets, mine to keep. 
Your secrets, mine to keep. 


Flowers


Any man who could call himself one belongs
to the prism of a captured beam of sun
the bean of energy has been planted into you
and we we grow and we grow, we sprout, renewed
the abstract notion of belonging to you
belonging to god, belonging to one, two or three
in a warped trinity 
we are outlaws, thrashin in the mouths of the mainstream
tired, young minds fighting for sanity in bland places we never should be
mighty mighty one, two twenty brokeback mountain snogging molly hopeless folly
or endless insight we ascend the throne of the stars in broken twilight
and drink libations offered to the debaunchorus night
the plight of ever man is to float listlessly
in the void of mediocrity till he blind enough to see
the only way out of the tunnel is to 
carve his own escape
life in the modern age is a mere play date with god, 
we just smile and nod, wave and clasp hands with bad men 
in order to make our bank accounts fatter, souls grow weak
inner selves collapsing starvin, nothin to eat
in order to overcome adversity we can’t throw buzzwords at issues
can’t always cry and blow snot in the same ratted tissue
let’s ascend, brothers into the plane of all life and rattle the 
cage of our struggles and strife
a call to arms, we better get better we better get better
 


SPIRITUALASCENTION101 (prod. pan§†aʂ)

check out this awesome mixtape if you haven't
some of the best production ive heard in a long time
http://flawlessleaugecollection.bandcamp.com/album/noir
-----
LYRICS

through the building
alarm i stay calm
cold fever sweats run down the crease of my lip
perforate the skin of my palm
I was never wrong, through all the false idols
I was never tagged as beast I kept clean through all
the blood trials
always stayed primal
never not wild
always clean, through all the paid pilgrimages
all the raw sacrilege
all of it counterfeit from the babes birth to his service
the pastor telling lies bout a man who don’t deserve it
the dog of death howls and the wolves come to the door
who the fuck ordered death? Yo, who is the for?

I am clean, i can breathe
i can think, I can see
that many men have broke their backs but none have been as strong as me
HA
i live through my own experience 
breathe through my own delirium 
Earth shatters glass I react with each moment that comes to pass
you can’t measure the spirits surrounding 
reverberating and rebounding
in the space where we shed all physicality 
 try to read me I’ll react wit da blast of a gat and sleep soundly 
I live unafraid because, to speak frankly, the void surrounds me

The wire we walk grows thin and starts shaking
just in time for the beat and your teeth to start breaking
We’re granted god givens gifts of patience and piety
but I returned my in exchange for sub machine guns and notoriety 
I live through the menace of the curses and the faint hum
of a second coming, arise and confide with the Old Ones
to find through the lies that you die first and reverse the 
healing powers of a…SHAMAN

ah, here’s leviathan rising
high tiding and riding waves of destructive apocalypse digest
the facts of the revelation before the beast cometh


END VISION (Beat by Man Bites Dog)

PAPER BAG (beat by DROOP)

come on down from the bridge to see the sunlight, birthright 
is tight and tuned
bright and used
time to lose

you trip and at once you feel the light of energy
the corruption of the matrix as it falls around me
the corruption of the glitch as we fade in and out of a reality that
we don;t give three shits about
time to twist and shout, time to fake em out
and keep chugging beers till we find our way out
‘nether time to pass the time, more abstract visions delibate and hate on joys we’ve been given, the mission is to blast holes in traditions i’m militant and a ain’t got no reason to feel different

ah, here’s leviathan rising
high tiding and riding waves of destructive apocalypse digest
the facts of the revelation before the beast cometh
oneth toweth three towel me and have sex in public places 
get off on a hi—nnee high queens and tits bad rocks for a bitch bad thoughts and other shit bad minds 
that we thought we had control of all the time

well we don’t! what a joke, thought I had you laughing
the rat attata bad bad blast keeps rocking and sail in like the santa ana
bad mantra bad fodder work harder, better faster bloody stronger
my own time to shine came and passed with the sun and now i’m rocking some immortal energy, young
mystics and spirits are floating in the void i reach to grab hands but 
i get smoke in my eyes spit up and fried dried out malnourished and left to die

i gave myself a fever so i could write rhymes clearer 

END VISION PRT. 2 (Beat by Man Bites Dog)

Slam poetry redux of Aphex Twin's Stone in Focus

white pinpoints, far off

still

even as i see so close-

i could touch:

 

i fell into the large softness of a likewise empty space

through the entrance of this cylinder,  revving with a silly solar-powered engine,

while, at home

they tracked my flight and waited with

corkgun-jumping flying champagne bottles even though

they were still praying for my return, admitting

the worst in somber whispers

 

malnourishment makes the stars look beautiful, i have noticed,

and i can almost see my reflection

in the darkness, or at least

since my spectacles shattered

i have seen faces in each individual, dark particle of flaky vision

and they have spoken to me.

 

Most notably god,

who has said unto me that i will die in his backyard bush the same way a

rat-poisoned squirrel would

die a pest in a houseman's lawn-

but i have a much better view

 

and you must remember, this is how it ends

we give up all we know

for an alien world

 

oxygen is running low, or something drastic, more-or-less

but such

disasters grow tiresome, for at somepoint

a man must admit his fate.

i admit mine, now. I will die a pest

in god's backyard

 

i will miss my wife-but

with each vibration that resounds through my dying frame

and each

shallow breath i take till i maynot take take more,

i look at his kingdom as i do

and realize none of it is meant for me:

he crafted me from a stardust mold and i am nothing but a middle child,

lost behind manythings more important:

 

but the best i could do was gaze upon my fore-bearers dominion and once-home

and hope i could

gain cosmic, godlike insight

but i am merely one

strand or rope in humanities DNA

and even as I perch above earth like a god

i am not

 

and i will die a man

i will die nothing among something-but

i will miss my wife

 

white pinpoints, far off still

even as i'm so close to mankind's fate and origin,

so close

i could touch with a hand-eying

my morality god an I, we

speak like stones and move likewise into

the mouth of a powerful sun's death

 

white space floats with euphoria-riddled spirits

alongside the mouth a singularly apathetic god, till

they recede into the cosmos and realize

they don't mean anything at all-

Slam Poetry Stone in Focus Redux-Thoughts of a Dying Astronaut

Instrumental by MF DOOM, One Beer
-----

Open me like x-mas, bigger than fucking texas
Verbal atrocities just short of suicide
Mystery box dead or alive
Cept this aint no game no shame 
keep doing what you want to just keep in mind
that's fine to sip some brew when there’s just a few left
but always keep a bottle under your chair for when I take a breath
and pronounce to all my fucking loyal subjects
like charlamange was just a game and now we fuckin playing with ovenmitts
air raid champ paid for all this shit to blitz all the upside down towns littered with
spit and shit
cook me up some good times and I’ll spit out some good rhymes
Make her howl louder than Ginsberg on a good night flip her like an acrobat, wow, right?
Delight in the soft froth of a frosted cup of brew tight
tuned and overused no sloppy mop me 
on a floor and closed the door store all your 
clothes for winner 
save up all your cards and win some money for the winter
never get infected like a splinter I guess I could rap faster like a sprinter
Or slow like some chicken who knows his breast is the next dinner
Sippin some red wine with a palate for a painting
everybody knows she’s about as classy as a real lady
and she’s Italian, dress’s me a stallion
mm food I’m eatin sloppy like I’m fucking mowin
24 half gone song strung and tuned to abused notes wrote
on napkins and hatched chicks in the morning headaches soarin
rockin the verse like this shit is so bornin zzzz a bit more than half alseep
hangover last at least a few weeks do the math or do some addorral this isn’t fucking therapy hilariously laugh track to claps math adds like fucking chemistry 
play a straight man and laugh to death all your enemies
take a breath and your dead to me
Militant like Oakaniowa when I bake I need a base so sober lady start the shower

like a grizzly bear for two weeks don’t shave no champagne like john wayne
used to do in them movies groove me like a record
read me like an LP everybody want a copy
like a protester screamin somebody fucking stop me
while police ride by in bean bag cannons mounted on jalopies 
Believe hype right like a charlatan on a steel horse
voice coarse and hoarse from cigarettes disgusted 
but at least they keep your lungs warm storm
The stage for more kegs and pegs
extradite and fight those who step on planked wood
sent overboard and landed on some ford’s hood good
vomit spit hit with poison eating 
trashbags of ecstasy let her fuckin think I’m classy or that 
I’m fucking sippin hennesy it’s her problem when all my friends disgust society
Or discuss me But make sure you save me a beer man i’m thirsty 
Fake words crafted daftly describe your misery 
never academic pandemics of the mind please
Like a tavern vulture swoop abandoned beer drunk culture
Got another bottle to waddle all the sadder thoughts away like cat walking supermodels
Curses as placeholders take a breathe a pace solider stand in line while they shave
Orange like spraytans or cold devoid of pulse like dead bodies
Absurdity blurted me to places I should never be and verses rehearsed versed and reversed to things I should never see 


MOMS

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