i waded into the river; the water was like glass and it made my skin burn. the surface was a black mirror glaze, but beneath it, the current began to pull.
as the snow fell on the surface—caught by the tension—it stayed for a moment before turning liquid and joining the sable pool beneath it. following suit, i slipped deeper in.
buzzing of nearby streetlights, slosh of cars passing by in the distance, now became apparent by their absence. below, the knives cutting into my body retreated; in their place, a static pulsing that numbed and dulled. it was disrupted by a shock, an accumulation of static: water now entering my lungs. 
the impressions of snow left on the riverbed, footprints now slowly being filled in. before long they’ll disappear completely, leaving nothing behind.

The River

a cover. originally performed by thrice.


all you great men of power 
you who boast of your feats 
politicians and entrepreneurs 
can you safe-gaurd your breath 
in the night while you sleep? 
keep your heart beating steady and sure 
as you lie in your bed 
does the thought haunt your head 
that you're really rather small? 

if there's one thing i know in this life 
we are beggars all 


all you champions of science 
and rulers of men 
can you summon the sun from it's sleep? 
and does the earth seek your council on how fast to spin? 
can you shut up the gates of the deep? 
don't you know that all things 
hang as if by a string over darkness 
poised to fall? 

if there's one thing i know in this life 
we are beggars all 


all you bigshots that swagger 
and stride with conceit 
did you devise how your frame would be formed? 
if you'd be raised in a palace 
or live out on the street? 
choose the place or the hour you'd be born? 
tell me what can you claim? 
not a thing, not your name 
tell me if you can recall 
just one thing not a gift in this life 

can you hear what's been said? 
can you see now that everything's grey 
after all? 


if there's one thing i know in this life 
we are beggars all

released March 6, 2019 
eric makwich - vocals, guitar, synthesizers, drum machine, programming, production, mixing 
carson brommeland - additional guitar 

written by thrice

Beggars

sleep like i'm dead already
heavy like my bones
it comes too easy
i can't let it go

watch it wither watch it die
i could never keep a plant alive
same goes for everything
black thumb

i can't erase this picture
i can't stop the world
you get so beautifully back on top and
i'm unfurled

you're still the static on my breath
recounting whispers that she left
it's not what's in me
it's just where i am

Carving Grounds

The Real Thing

featuring Brom



i’m a pit of poison with a thin sugar skin
you can keep on knocking but I won’t let you in
it’s a mirage oasis, clever trick, last-ditch bid and 
you wont fall for it again

I’m sick of seasons, frostbit air stinging skin
i’ll just keep pretending like the spring comes again
that you’ll keep me covered, keep me warm, keep me hidden
till then, just fall for it again


i can’t stop giving in
you take on a whim
my hands are not honest, your jaw comes unhinged
swallowed whole


[Brom]
never better when better killed you
choke up the nerve to find out the truth
holding hope, fire’s the fastest way through
option or object, start from anew
pushing past the feeling of used
i’m running from ghosts, watch how they move
writing on walls seems harder to prove
it’s holding me back, it’s harder to lose

bloodstains on the driveway; i’ll  wait
thought it was a friday; lost date
try to see it my way; new take
hoping for a highway; fast lane
looking kinda sideways; view changed
never better, better won’t do, i’m tapped
what to do when glue comes loose? relax
kinda feel like i’m on track, step back

i need this. Repeat this
light it up, then burn it down speechless
egregious, don’t breathe this
hold it up, then smash it to pieces

break bones, break bones—life check
no hope, no hope—i’ve left
so go, just go—deep breath
this ghost, this ghost—seems set
on running me down, running me ‘round
bleeding me out, seeing me drown
deep breath
i’m trying—calm down
seeing spots now, leaving the ground
seeing how long i’ve left
distressed, dressed down, lead less
a mess; mess-bound, clean-less
i’ll test—test how—seems best
next best, but how? bleed, yes

Ringston

Ringston (feat. Brom)

a cover. originally performed by rina sawayama.


tell me your story, and i'll tell you mine 
i'm all ears, take your time, we've got all night 
show me the rivers crossed, the mountains scaled 
show me who made you walk all the way here 

settle down, put your bags down 
you're alright now 

we don't need to be related to relate 
we don't need to share genes or a surname 
you are, you are 
my chosen, chosen family 

hand me a pen, and i'll rewrite the pain 
when you're ready, we'll turn the page together 
open the bottle, it's time we celebrate 
who you were, who you are 
we're one and the same 

we don't need to be related to relate 
we don't need to share genes or a surname 
you are, you are 
my chosen, chosen family 

(i choose you, you chose me) 
i chose you, you chose me 
chosen family 
(i choose you, you chose me) 
i chose you, you chose me 
(chosen family) 
we're alright now 

we don't need to be related to relate 
we don't need to share genes or a surname 
you are, you are 
my chosen, chosen family 

so what if we don't look the same 
we've been going through the same thing 
yeah you are, you are 
my chosen, chosen family


released October 2, 2020 
eric makwich - vocals, synthesizers, drum machine, programming, production, mixing 

written by rina sawayama

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