Love
You’ve been living inside your fears
You’re not alone
Lifetimes pass
Just looking away...

Slow
You walk to meet me
Now that you know 
Now that you know

Slow
You walk to meet me
Now that you know 
Now that you know

Love
You’ve been willing to slide for years
You’re not alone
We’ve all lost track
Just counting the days…

Slow
You walk to meet me
Now that you know 
Now that you know

Now that you know 
Now that you know

Now That You Know

Real
It’s been real to get to know you
It’s been really real
It’s been real
Real
It’s been real to get to…  
(get to get to get to….)

You’ve been hiding out longer than a vampire
Shrinking from the light of day
I can’t believe you were always there
Just around the corner 
Serendipitous you came my way

Real
It’s been real to get to know you
It’s been really real
It’s been real
Real
It’s been real to get to…  
(get to get to get to….)

Though you’ve been watching me wary from a distance
Not certain you could ever be sure
I want you to know that I will be right here
Just around the corner
Always ready when you choose to show

Real
It’s been real to get to know you
It’s been really real
It’s been real
Real
It’s been real to get to…  
(get to get to get to….)

Real

One late night response to an old tune I never really liked...

Sweeter Child O'

Shuffled pop dance tune with a harmonized bluesy vocal and a dog in it somewhere.

It Must Be For The Dog

Sun Daze

I see you hesitate
I see you start to hesitate
I can't stop to wait
Can't stop to wait...

Can't Stop To Wait

Written, produced, and performed by Janky Buddha

Chemo 
Chemo chemo chemo chemo
Chemo chemo
Chemo!

Cells break down so lost and lonely
Mindlessly dividing 
No reason why

Why?
 
Chemo chemo
Chemo!

Why?!

Chemo 
Chemo chemo chemo chemo
Chemo chemo chemo chemo

Chromosomal damage
Multiplying growing blindly
With no reason why

Why?

Chemo

I’ve got time
We’ve all got time to find our way to what we’re meant to be
Now’s the time
Now’s the time to get this right this once
Be free
……….
Got another round of
Eat sleep work play shit fuck 
Carry on
Been there done that not much more to know
If I can just 
Stay calm lay low count my breath and just let go 
Want less and be here now
I got one more life to go… 
I got one more life to go… 
I got one more life to go… 
……….
Got to make time react
Get down pull up push back
Hot cold freeze up they crack
Come down hard nothing moves
Break the rules now you groove
Hope the subterfuge smooths the slight of hand
............

One More Life To Go

Written, Produced, and Performed by Janky Buddha ©2021

SKIN IN THE GAME

Always thinking it will be alright
Never want to have to break the rules
Walk around it to avoid a fight
Always doing what you had to do

How can every day just be the same?

Never gonna change till
You got skin in the game

Always rushing just to not be late
Never arrive before the train goes by
You neither own nor can avoid your fate
Never pausing just to wonder why

How can every day just be the same?

Never gonna change till
You got skin in the game

Yesterday’s tomorrow’s left you
Where you are today
Down here in the real world 
It’s the dream gets in your way

Always hoping for another try
Never take the chance before it’s gone
Yet now another moment passes by
Only you can ever right this wrong

How can every day just be the same?

Never gonna change till
You got skin in the game

Yesterday’s tomorrow’s left you
Where you are today
The future’s just a dream world 
Another dream that just gets, just gets in your way

Skin In The Game

The Wind
...............
Her light
Shining through the dark
Remains

(Listen to the wind blow)

Her voice
Calling through the night
Though it wanes

(Listen to the wind blow)

She’s found us here
Now it’s time to go
The silence we are fleeing holds our name...

(Listen to the wind blow)

We wound up here
Now it’s time we know
The emptiness we’re feeling
Shows the Way…

(Listen to the wind blow) 

written, produced, performed byJanky Buddha ©

The Wind

Another timeless meditation on the finding the joyz in futility

Bottomless

Freeway Casanova

I’m a Fairfield Inn, freeway Casanova,
And though I hardly know ya,
I can tell you’ve got a thing for me
There’s a Motel Six where we can get our kicks
and I’ll warn ya...
If we’re running late there’s a Super Eight
We could try just for a change of pace

Haven’t I told you?
You’re not the only one
So check your heart at the door
Haven’t I told you I’ve got no plans...?

I’m a How ya been? honey step on in...
Be sure to call before you come - guy.
I see you can’t hardly wait to hit the interstate
and pick a venue for our cup of tea

I’m your wysiwyg guy with a glint in his eye
and just enough cash to loan ya
There’s no incentive to buy when you can always try
And what they’re selling’s what I’ll give you
for free...

(Haven’t I told you?)
You’re not the only one
So check your heart at the door
Haven’t I told you I’ve got no plans...?
(You don’t need another man hanging on to weigh you down)
I’ve got no plans...
(You’ve already settled, now you just want to get out of town…)
No plans...
You know you really need to get lost...
Before you can be found

Break Over Verse

I’m a Fairfield Inn, freeway Casanova,
I’d kinda like to show ya,
Ain’t no sin to show a little sympathy
There’s a Holiday Inn just around the bend
I...really like your eyes...
You know it’s not too late
For you to ditch your date
And slip out the back door with me.

Haven’t I told you?
You’re not the only one
So check your heart at the door
Haven’t I told you I’ve got no plans...?

Freeway Cassanova

You roll that bag down numbered hallways
Count the doors, dip your card, click you’re in
A couple of beds, a TV, a bible in a drawer...
Welcome back to where you’ve never been

­Nothing here to remind you
Or tell you just who you are
No wife, no kids, no good night kisses...
No need to set the alarm…
 	      		
This is your wake up call
This is your wake up call
 
Through the glass a highway is always leaving,
Darkness falls devoid of charm.
Where you came from, how you got there, where you go from here...
You lay awake and then you fall --

All night you run through the halls of the shelter sleep should bring
All night you run through the halls of your mind
All night you run through the halls of the shelter sleep should bring
Then you hear the phone ring...
 
Lead break over Verse
Chorus x4
This is your wake up call...

Wake Up Call

It’s about time you admit to yourself
that you’re burning inside
to take a turn with me
It’s about time you stopped looking away
Let yourself see what you see

It’s about time you admit you don’t know
That there’s nowhere to go
You’re in the middle of it
It’s about time you leave the whole thing behind
It takes a slave to know free

It’s about time you came over to my side baby
About time that you shake off the fear
It would be a crime if you held yourself back forever
When love will never be more clear

It’s about time…
It’s about time…

It’s about time nothing comes in between
time you know what I mean
when there’s nothing to say
It’s about time we own the hand that we’re dealt
I know you know what to play...

It’s about time you stop running in place
time you get in the race
see how fast you can go
It’s about time your rehearsing is through
Let’s get on with the show.

It’s about time you came over to my side baby
And if time is the thing that you fear
It would be a crime if you held yourself back and never
found the love that waits right here

It about time...

It's About Time

Laid-back guitar-driven let's-lay-all-our-cards-on-the-table breakup or not ballad, of sorts.
...
Another night you’re leaving
but as you walk away
I can tell that you’ve had the thought before
once walking out some door
that you really ought to stay

You’re all through believing
you might as well just have your say
then once you get it off your chest
you can leave me like the rest
and I may just be on my way...

So let’s have the truth
the whole truth
and nothing but the truth
why don’t you tell it from the heart
or for once baby just listen?

You can’t say what you can’t hear
You won’t face what you don’t fear
And then why do you only see the one thing that’s missing?

There’s no time for grieving
Tomorrow’s just another day
And when we’re once more on our own
We’ll be no more no less alone
Than we would be had we stayed…

So why not the truth…?
...


One Thing Missing

When you awaken to the scales
falling from your eyes
there in the place where nothing changes
and it’s no surprise
when confronted with the knowledge 
that your alibis just won’t do

You’ll be walking to a place
where you always go
or trying to remember something you should know
or glance to catch a shadow
fleeing from the corner of your eye
...
Just around the corner 
Loving smiles and open arms
it’s there within your reach
A wave breaking on the beach...
...
Like a dream within a dream
from which you can’t awake
Or a treasure you discover
That cannot take
There’s a feeling that you’re fleeing 
something you can’t shake
though you try

You’ll be sitting at your desk
talking on the phone
or standing at a party feeling all alone
or checking your reflection in the glass
as you pass by...
...
A figure in the distance
so familiar yet too far
you run to close the gap
the lure within the trap
...
And just as suddenly you’re there
A warm sunny place to rest
It’s clear you’ve passed some test
Now you can see just how it ends
There surrounded by your family and friends and

For just a moment 
You could do it all again...

Then you’re gone...


And Then You're Gone

THE FALLS

I WANNA LEARN TO LIVE
WHERE THERE AREN’T ANY ANSWERS
WHERE THE QUESTIONS JUST FADE TO GRAY
IN THE COOL LIGHT OF DAWN

COOL LIGHT OF DAWN...

I WANNA LEARN TO GO
LIKE THERE AIN’T A DIRECTION
NO LEFT OR RIGHT FOR ME
JUST STRAIGHT AHEAD

JUST STRAIGHT AHEAD…

ALWAYS A LITTLE BIT MORE TO KNOW
A LITTLE FURTHER TO GO
YOU KNOW YOU’RE RUNNING OUT...
OR IS THE PATH RUNNING OUT ON YOU?
EITHER WAY YOU’RE HEADED
FOR THE FALLS

I WANNA LEARN TO DIE
LIKE MY LIFE DEPENDED ON IT
WANNA JUMP BEFORE I’M PUSHED
I WANNA LEARN TO GO

I’M GONNA HAVE TO LEARN TO LEAVE…

ALWAYS A LITTLE BIT MORE TO KNOW
A LITTLE FURTHER TO GO
YOU KNOW YOU’RE RUNNING OUT... 
OR IS THE PATH RUNNING OUT ON YOU?
BY THE WAY YOU’RE HEADED
FOR THE FALLS


The Falls

REALER

It's 4 am
In cold sweat I'm wide awake
Chasing a hunch
A fleeing shadow shy of light
Beyond my eyes
Beyond the night that brings it all back to me
I fear I've left behind
Another world that makes me real

Now what was that?!
Feels like I’ve fallen through the ceiling
Into this bed
More like a raft adrift at sea
Familiar cracks
Begin to open in the plaster
Just barely hold at bay
The crushing weight of sky beyond

It's just a dream
But what's a dream?
I'm telling you
I know there ain't much
Much realer than a dream
But what a dream!
Almost more than true
It was just...
Just so much realer...

Now who am I?
A random name plucked from some fantasy
A flimsy veil
Meant to distract me from the truth
Always the same
Forgotten love there waiting patiently
And as she's reaching out
I'm only falling deeper still...

It's just a dream
But what's a dream?
I'm telling you
I know there ain't much
Much realer than a dream
But what a dream!
Almost more than true
It was just...
Just so much realer...




Realer

The Change

Now have you heard
They’re saying no more now your time’s up?
And have you seen
those pictures from above?
And is it true
They had to leave some down to climb up?
And did you know there’s no one left there
to welcome you home?

Did we believe
that somehow all we’ve done would add up?
We could out run
the shattered world left down below?
And is it true
That one can sleep too long to wake up?
They’re not your friends
There reaching out now to welcome you home...

The Change
Are we ever going to make the Change?
Change!
The Change
How we ever going to make the Change?...

How could we know
Our great escape would leave us tied up?
Our very strength above
would prove a weakness from below
And is it true
We’ve always known the way to rise up?
Is there a chance
You’ll be the only one to welcome you home?

Chorus + out

The Change

SLMF

I’ve been living like tomorrow’s for sure
And all my yesterdays would add up to something grand
Like there’s a witness to my world
Someone just listening in
Despite a lifetime of stories shared still I’m there alone
And though I’m always hungry for something new…

I am a super lucky motherfucker
I’ll bet a dollar if you’re listening
you are too ~
I am a super lucky motherfucker
Won’t catch me crying
You can shoot me if I do

I miss the most of every moment as it passes me by
Each step I take in some direction just leads away
I keep on staring out into the sky
As though to see the stars anew
Find a chink in the wall of the night
That I might break through

Though I’ll forever be reaching for something more…

Chorus

(Bridge)
I got a whole new day before me
A pretty clean shirt on my back
And if the whole thing starts to bore me
it’s just imagination that I lack
(That’s what my momma said…)

Chorus

Chorus/round/out...

SLMF

There’s something you don’t... 
realize.
There’s something you don’t... 
realize.

Now wake up
open your eyes
what you see will be a big surprise
you've been down for the count
asleep at the wheel
nodding off in that slow lane
once again
with visions of that fat chance
coming at you like the headlights
of a head on collision…

There’s something you don’t...
realize.

There you are -
Have you even been paying attention?
Just where have you been keeping yourself anyway?
You know there’s something happening here
And it ain’t exactly clear
Is it?
it’s all just going so fast - 
Can’t keep up
And you thought it would take longer
Wouldn’t be over so damn soon
But its always already over
Already beginning again
So are you gonna get with the program?
(There's something you don't...)
Its clearly already been getting with you…
(...realize.)

There’s something you don’t...
realize.

Something You Don't

There you go
You’re at it again
Feeling like you’ve been here before

You need to be doing what you already know
Just doing what you already know

You’re too much looking ahead
Feeling like you’re falling behind

Just keep doing what you already know, honey
Doing what you already know

Now all of us we go there sometimes
Just remember that you’ll find your way back
If you can just keep moving 
You gotta just keep moving Darlin’...
On ahead.


Gray day
Nothing’s for sure
A cup of coffee and a clatter of change

You need to start doing what you already know
Start doing what you already know

You’re too much just looking inside
Try looking out from inside somebody new?

You really gotta be doing 
You really gotta be doing 

Now all of us we go there sometimes
Just remember that you’ll find your way back
If you can just keep moving 
You gotta just keep moving Darlin’...
On ahead.
On ahead.


What You Already Know

There you go
Sleeping away half of the day
Not bothering to look for a way out
Now you’d rather merely do it again...

Don’t you know
Just waiting for the storm clouds to clear
Will never really get you from here to there
Where you imagine that’s where you’d rather be…

How hard can it be?

Only darkness
Will let you see the spark in the night
the moment when you flee or you fight
Is right now
Baby just how hard can it be?

How hard can it be?
To just look up when your eyes are cast down...
How hard can it be?
Stop kicking yourself when you’re there on the ground...
And if all you really need it love, it’s everywhere, and it’s free…

I know you don’t believe you could ever feel better
I know you can’t believe this has ever been done before...
Now you won’t believe it will all get better...
You just can’t believe you gotta get this done once more…

How hard can it be, baby?
Just how hard can it be?
How hard can be, baby?

You can’t believe…
You won’t believe…
It’s like you don’t wanna believe...
But you gotta believe, you gotta believe…
You just gotta believe, yeah...

How Hard Can It Be?

Ain’t never gonna be easy
to save a wretch like me
there may be a price to pay in the end
I’ll take my chances and see

I know you’re trying to be good
you wait, you pray, and you watch what you do
But if I’ve even got a sliver of hope
to make it or break in this world -
It’s with a wretch like you

It’s with a  wretch like you...

If there’s just one chance in hell, 
there may well be one for me
Either God rolls dice
or it makes no sense to call ourselves free

And even when you choose
there’s something you lose 
whatever you do
And if you’re ever going to feel
like the big bad wolf 
that you’re meant to be -
it’s with a wretch like me

Together with a wretch like you… 
With a wretch like you… 

Uh huh a wretch…
Uh huh a wretch…
Uh huh ~ 

Wretch Like You

Slow, spare, melodic meditation - a bit of a hymn - on being together in our isolation, alone in our intimacy. 

Clearly

You clearly are
You’re clearly wondering
You clearly want
You clearly want to know
You clearly are 
You’re clearly wondering
You clearly want
You clearly want to know

I’ve been wondering myself
But I just can’t picture this
Oh how I’ve tried.

You clearly are
You’re clearly wondering
You clearly want
You clearly want to know
You clearly are 
You’re clearly wondering
You clearly want
You clearly want to know

I’ve been wondering myself
Will we ever wake up from this?
Oh how I’ve cried.

Clearly

You’ve got to
Know enough not to leave it 
Know enough not to leave it ‘till the end.

You’ve got to
Know enough not to leave it 
Know enough not to leave it ‘till the end.

I’ve often wondered how the hell I found myself here at your feet
You locked the only door behind me and then threw away the key
But when your love decided time to go
And left me barren how was I to know
This abandonment the price to set me free
I see now…

You’ve got to
Know enough not to leave it 
Know enough not to leave it ‘till the end.

You’ve got to
Know enough not to leave it 
Know enough not to leave it ‘till the end.

But when your love decided time to go
And left me barren how was I to know
This surrender was the path to victory
I see now...


'Til The End

Work in progress that's emerged from the free-floating anxiety we're all feeling here at the threshold of the Trump era. A little forbidding; a little hopeful. The Survivor's Theme that plays about 2/3's of the way through the movie when the hero (or heroine) finally pulls it together and commits to their destiny...

See In The Dark

Where did he go?
Where could he be?
After all the miles together
After all they’d seen

Long hair whipping like a flame in the wind
Never bothering to look where they’d been
The nights sleeping in a broken down car
Didn’t matter much to know where they are

He said the road was like the answer to a question that
We haven’t found the words to ask...

So they set out driving that old Bonneville 
Just went out driving that old Bonneville…

She liked to watch him drive
He always kept his eyes on the horizon
They never really did much talking
Never really much to say

Just a look and a nod was all it took
She held his silence like a pebble in her hand
One dusty town just led to the next
Who knows around the corner it would all make sense

Then came the day the road ended at the sea
Winter waves lapping on the cold beach
They wrapped themselves in a blanket on the sand - so close...
But just out of reach

He said you never see the end in the beginning
‘Cause it isn’t there ‘till you look back

Then they just climbed back in that old Bonneville...
They drove on back in that old Bonneville

		*
Now where did all the years go?
And where could he be now?
She never told him ‘bout the child that she carried
She just didn’t know how...

Now the days pass with a new kind of weight
She can’t just leave things behind
Sometimes she’d like to with so much on her plate,
With so much on her mind...

she stares out of the window and her eyes unfocus
She’s out there with him once again...

Somewhere driving that old Bonneville...
With him driving that old Bonneville…

That old Bonneville...
That old Bonneville...

That Old Bonneville

You've been trying to make this all be true.

To Make This All Be True

Something I recorded to practice playing over changing keys...

Shankbone

Taking It Hard

You know I can’t eat, No I can’t sleep
I got a thousand BFFs I gotta keep (up to date)
With all my likes, and all my frowns
Got an emoji for I love it, gotta another for oh wow...

I gotta post, I gotta tweet
I got a gazillion followers I gotta keep (up to date)
With all my thoughts, and all my trends
I gotta snapchat all my means, and tic toc all my ends
(chorus)
But I’ve got no one to talk to 
Because all my friends are on their phones.
I’ve got no one to hang with anymore.
They’re all online. There’s nobody home. 

I’m not a creep, I’m not a troll
Just wanna make this meme go viral
To fill some yawning hole 
With all of this FOMO rising , I gotta LOL
The hive mind might just be paradise
And then again it might just be hell...

But I’ve got no one to talk to 
Because all my friends are on their phones.
I’ve got no one to hang with anymore.
We’re all online. There’s nobody home.

All My Friends Are On Their Phones

All songs © Janky Buddha - Alt Pop, Bubble Funk, Old Soul & Electronic/Down Tempo leaning stuff. And then whatever comes next...

Janky Buddha

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