Music is all I've got left, I am tired and I am sick.
I dunno whether I am gonna die or not, an that sucks.
But I am tired.
Tired..and I wrote something about feeling tired, I wrote something about how I feel lately, past couple of months.
Tired:
I’m tired of being “okay” or “fine” with everything. It’s not okay and it’s not fine. For the past couple of days that’s been my catchphrase. I’ve been the person that you could literally spit on and I would be “okay,” it would be “fine.” Well I’m tired. I deserve something. I deserve more than what I always settle for. I’m stuck in a generation where it’s okay to string someone along, and I’ve allowed it. I’m guilty of being an enabler. I want something for MYSELF. I don’t want to share your emotions when you have mine wholeheartedly. That isn’t fair. I’m a nice guy! I keep hearing it! I keep hearing I’m funny and I’m nice. I’m amazing, relaxed, different, good, but in the end not good enough. Is it wrong for me to want someone to grab my face and kiss me passionately and not hesitantly because of fear of attachment? Is it wrong to want to have someone there for me when I’m sick, or even just to hold me at night and not have to leave the next morning? I’m not fine. I feel used. I feel tired and I feel the need to want for more. I’M TOO OLD TO BE PLAYING GAMES. I have and will always say that. Why don’t we as a generation mutually agree to grow up and just say what we want and stop being kids. This isn’t Neverland. Welcome to real life. Now grow up. I’m tired of settling and all I want is someone to care for me wholeheartedly. I don’t think that’s too much. Do you?


Nagi<3Savi