Lady I can’t stand the way you waste all of my time
Shoulda been smarter, better, never fucked with fire signs
Sadly now, I’m feeling blue

Somebody once told me that astrology is fake
But the proof is in the pudding and that moron, he was straight
So here’s my screed, without further ado:

Fire signs just blow my mind, want all the trouble they can find
So you’re good at drinking, what else can you do?
Co-star told me this was bad, but I’m so weak for girls in plaid
I’m burning up and need to be rescued

It’s hard to write a song about a Sagittarius
Because the only thing that rhymes with it is Aquarius
Luckily I hate them too

See her heart’s a frozen tundra and she’s itching for a lark
Wants me when she’s drinking, then just leaves me in the dark
Somehow though, I’ll make it through

Fire signs just blow my mind, want all the trouble they can find
The day I met you I’ll forever rue
Co-star told me this was bad, but I’m so weak for girls in plaid
It’s clear at this point that I’m really screwed

Oh it’s hard to write a song about a Sagittarius
Because the only thing that rhymes with it is Aquarius
Luckily I hate them too

Singles

I Fucking Hate Fire Signs

I am not legally obligated to know how to sing or play guitar. All songs herein are dedicated to my business associate, Napoleon Hindenberg.

Napoleon Airship