50-year-old Suzy Gates has just discovered she has a terminal illness. But she doesn't want to tell her adopted son because he's busy making the record that could be his lucky break. http://force10gayle.com. Photo by Kristina Flour on Unsplash: https://unsplash.com/@tinaflour

LYRICS BELOW

You’ll never ever know a single thing about it
I’ll never ever give a single thing away
Though all I wanna do is run to the window and shout it	
I’ll just smile and tell you everything’s okay

I got a brand-new secret
I’ll keep it buried deep within my soul
I got a brand-new secret
And there’s no-one I can turn to, to console me
No-one to set me free

I been telling you a little white lie since the day you arrived
I been keepin’ something from you ever since you were only small
An’ twenny five years down the line it’s a lie that survived
So another one isn’t gonna hurt at all 

I got a brand-new secret
I’ll keep it locked up deep within my heart
I got a brand-new secret
And if I set it free, your world will fall apart
Your world will fall apart
							
Though I wanna pour my achin’ heart out
It’s now that you really gotta shine
So I’m going through hell 
But I’ll tell you that everything’s fine

I got a brand-new secret
And I’ll keep it buried deep within my soul
I got a brand-new secret
And there’s no-one I can turn to to console me
No-one to set me free

I got a brand-new secret
And I’ll keep it locked up deep within my heart
I got a brand-new secret
And if I set it free your world will fall apart
And I would never wanna break your heart

Brand New Secret - from Force Ten Gayle - sung by the writer

Can you name 1. The Song. 2. The Musical. 3. The Singer?!!!
I hope the clips come under the 'fair usage' umbrella as they are very short and no money is being made from this, it's just for fun. However, if any copyright holder has problems with this, please get in touch.
Photo by <a href="https://unsplash.com/@allthestars?utm_source=unsplash&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=creditCopyText">Sophie Dale</a> on <a href="https://unsplash.com/s/photos/cat-scream?utm_source=unsplash&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=creditCopyText">Unsplash</a>

Belter/held notes MT QUIZ

Vocal: Sarah-Louise Young - http://sarah-louise-young.com
Piano: Michael Roulston - http://michaelroulston.co.uk

ONE OF THE GREATS
Music and lyrics © Neil Bastian 2015

You people must find it so tiring
To slog and to struggle, and toil
While I sit up here just admiring
The view, as you scratch in the soil

You people profusely perspiring
While I lead the life of a star
Your anonymous lives lived in commonplace dives
My existence is better by far…

As one of the greats – I receive special treatment
As one of the greats – I don’t have to pay
As one of the greats – I get asked what my Tweet meant
People actually care what I say

As one of the greats – I breathe in the sweet scent
Of success, it’s like eau de cologne
When you’re one of the greats
You have millions of mates
Cos a superstar’s never alone

I line-dance with Liza, I brunch with Beyonce
Darling Madonna, she rings for advice
When she asked “what would Eva Peron say?”
I said “Madge, don’t ask me, ask Tim Rice”

When I’m out with a friend, Elton John, say
All the passersby clamour for selfies
In the midst of the fight
They just trample Reg Dwight
Cos it’s me they want framed on their shelfies

So when they talk about the high life
You’ll find they’re talking about my life
And when they talk about the low life
What they’re referring to is your life
Cos all you are is just a housewife
Out there with all the other wildlife
While you wash greasy plates
My new Learjet awaits
To whisk me away to the States

I’m mates with the Kates – just the ones worth the knowing
That’s Winslet and Windsor and dear Mossy-woo
My status dictates that I just keep on going
Straight to the front while you’re forming a queue

If I turn up late they’ll delay any opera
And speaking of Oprah, she’s friends with me too
When you’re one of the greats
You can dine with Bill Gates
Order takeaway from Timbuktu

As one of the greats, the world is your oyster
As one of the greats, you lap up the applause
As one of the greats, you can hire some boys ta
Dance for you naked, or just in their drawers

As one of the greats, I can crash all the parties
One glimpse of my face and they open the doors
I shampoo with champagne
At my villa in Spain
Where George Clooney serves me on all fours

As one of the greats, I need no introduction
As one of the greats, I can do what I will
As one of the greats, money’s just no obstruction
I use caviar for my pigswill

As one of the greats I command all attention
As one of the greats I can ask for the moon
And also the stars
And they might throw in Mars
But the sun… well, they’ll let me know soon

This dream I create as I slave in the office
My boss, who I hate, piles on more paperwork
I pray for the day I can simply tear off his
Stupid toupee and tell him he’s a jerk!

But up until then I’ll still daydream of stardom
I’ll sit here and ponder my glorious fate
My horoscope states
That my future awaits
My future – as one of the greats!
Just you wait!

One Of The Greats - vocal Sarah-Louise Young, piano Michael Roulston

Mistletoe Berry White

Gayle Bailey had intended to tell her long-lost son that she's his mother in a sensitive confession scene. Instead, she gets drunk and sings this song instead.

Real, Live Mother - SONG 12 from the musical 'Force Ten Gayle' (alternate demo)

Roaring drunk, Gayle spills the beans to Jason that she's his birth mother.

Piano demo. The show will have a full band arrangement.

Real Live Mother - SONG 12 from the musical 'Force Ten Gayle' (rough demo)

Lo-fi guitar demo sung by the songwriter.

Anglesey Eyes

Photo by Blake Wisz (https://unsplash.com/@blakewisz)

Pitching In (basic guitar demo)

Duet. Willy tells Gayle to think twice before telling Jason she's his real mother - Gayle argues back.

Guitar demo only - the show will have a full band arrangement. Plus, the song needs shortening.

Photo of covering eyes by Annie Spratt on Unsplash:
https://unsplash.com/@anniespratt

Ignorance Is Bliss - SONG 8 from the musical 'Force Ten Gayle' (rough demo)

Jason expresses his excitement at being offered to write and album for superstar singer Gayle Bailey.

I've labelled this 7B because it might merge with song 7 (Malibu Skies)

Guitar demo - the show will have a full band arrangement.

Photo of cheering guy by Japheth Mast on Unsplash: https://unsplash.com/@japhethmast

My Lucky Break - SONG 7B from the musical 'Force Ten Gayle'

At the airport, Suzy hesitates before flying to finally meet her lifelong heroine, Gayle Bailey.

Photo of monkey by Juan Rumimpunu on Unsplash: https://unsplash.com/@earbiscuits

Do I Really Wanna Meet Her - SONG 19 from the musical 'Force Ten Gayle' (rough demo)

Gayle tells Jason she's going to proudly display him to the whole town.

Guitar demo only - the show will have a full band arrangement.

Photo by Patrick Tomasso on Unsplash
https://unsplash.com/@impatrickt

I Wanna Show You Off - SONG 9 from the musical 'Force Ten Gayle' (rough demo)

Gayle rails at her record company boss for dropping her from his label on her 50th birthday, and goes on to rant about her 3 failed marriages.

Guitar demo only - the show will have a full band arrangement.

Photo of finger by Dollar Gill on Unsplash
https://unsplash.com/@dollargill

This Is How You Treat Me - SONG 3 from the musical 'Force Ten Gayle' (rough demo)

In revenge for being sacked by Gayle, Willy explains to Jason that Gayle has been lying to him about there being a new album to write songs for.

Guitar demo only - the show will have a full band arrangement.

Photo of vinyl record by Kobu Agency on Unsplash
https://unsplash.com/@kobuagency

There's No Album - SONG 15 from the musical 'Force Ten Gayle' (rough demo)

Suzy expresses her excitement that Jason has been asked to write songs for Gayle Bailey's new album at her Malibu beach house.

Guitar demo only - the show will have a full band arrangement.

Photo of seaside by Gerson Repreza on Unsplash
https://unsplash.com/@gersonrepreza

Malibu Skies - SONG 7 from the musical 'Force Ten Gayle' (rough demo)

This is one of Gayle's singles - Suzy is playing it to wind down after a shift at the supermarket.

Guitar demo only - this is will be a full band arrangement in the actual show.

Photo of man on building  by Tommy on Unsplash
https://unsplash.com/@tommygd12

You're Out There Somewhere - SONG 6 from the musical 'Force Ten Gayle' (rough demo)

Willy rails at the fact that Gayle has sacked him.

Photo of dogs fighting by Collins Lesulie on Unsplash
https://unsplash.com/@clesulie

If This Is How You Treat Me - Reprise - SONG 11 from the musical 'Force Ten Gayle' (rough demo)

Suzy Gates imagines what she'd say to her heroine Gayle Bailey - if she ever met her.

Singer: Rosalyn Miller
Piano: Winston Eade

Photo of hands by Kristina Litvjak on Unsplash:
https://unsplash.com/@kristinali

You've Always Been There For Me - SONG 2 from the musical 'Force Ten Gayle'

Gayle expresses her regret to Jason at having given him up for adoption, and for telling him the news in such an inappropriate way.

Sung by Megan Gilmartin.

My Darling Boy - SONG 16 from the musical 'Force Ten Gayle'

Suzy explains to Jason why she never told him he's adopted. Find out more about 'Force Ten Gayle': mail@neilbastian.com

Photo of sad girl by Tris Marie on Morguefile:
https://morguefile.com/creative/TrisOfficial

Newspaper Girl - SONG 14 from the musical 'Force Ten Gayle' (rough demo)

Music & lyrics by Neil Bastian. This will actually be a full cast chorus number with a band arrangement. From the new British musical 'The Mayfly Man'. http://mayflyman.com

LYRICS

The Ballad of Barnaby May

Consider the mayfly
Born to live for a day
The length of a day flies by
Then it’s time to vanish away
But what’s true for the tiniest mayfly
Has come true for a poor little boy
It’s hard to disguise our rising surprise
He’s growing before our own eyes!

Poor little Barnaby May
He’s living his life in a day
It started at dawn when this baby was born
He smiled in a curious way

They say today kids grow up quick
But Barnaby’s taking the Mick!
By midnight he’ll die of old age the poor guy
The clock on the wall’s going tick, tock, tick tock 

They call him the Mayfly Man
Poor little Mayfly Man
He’s growing from cradle to grave in the space of a day!
Mayfly Man
Poor little mayfly Man
Is there anyone out there alive with the power to save him?

He’s aging alarmingly fast
By lunchtime his childhood is past
By afternoon tea he’s at least thirty three
His parents are watching aghast (we’re aghast)
By ev’ning his hair will turn grey
And the curtain will fall on his play
He’s sprouting before us
So join in our chorus
Poor little Barnaby May

Barnaby May! (Mayfly Man!)
Barnaby May! (Poor little Mayfly Man!)
He’s growing from cradle to grave in the space of a day

Barnaby May! (Mayfly Man!)
Barnaby May! (Poor little Mayfly Man!)
Is there anyone out there alive with the power to save him?
(Save him, save him, save him!)
 
Can anyone save my baby?
Can anyone cure our son?
I’m praying that possibly maybe there’s someone
Who’ll save our son
 
From Barry to Botany Bay
We’ve all heard of Barnaby May
His story’s a cause for dismay
Perhaps he needs vitamin A?
His hopes are all fading away
Was it nature that made him this way?
 
He drew his first breath on the day of his death
So let’s pray
Won’t you pray
Let us pray
For Barnaby May

The Ballad Of Barnaby May (AKA The Mayfly March)- early demo

Demo of the final song from new musical 'The Mayfly Man' by Neil Bastian. The real thing will have lots of layered, swoony backing singers harmonising. www,mayflyman.com.

FLY LITTLE MAYFLY 
Music and lyrics © Neil Bastian 2019

Fly, little mayfly, fly
Fly to the deep blue sky

Fly away, escape today: 
The day you’re doomed to die in
Glide away beyond the grey
Where no-one sees you cryin’

High up to the milky way, 
Above all earthly sorrow
Abandon all thoughts of tomorrow
The spirit inside of you sings
So lift up those gossamer wings and

Fly, little mayfly, fly
Sigh, Mother Nature, sigh	
Sigh cos we only live to die
Despite ev’ry crazy endeavor
Sigh cos we’re born to say goodbye
But who wants to live forever?

Life is a prize that mystifies
It leaves us covered in scars
So fly to the skies that crystallise 
Your teardrops into stars

Why, little mayfly?
My pretty mayfly
Fly, little mayfly - fly!

Photo by Denis Degioanni on Unsplash: unsplash.com/@doingenia

Fly Little Mayfly (early demo)

Demo of a song from the musical 'Force Ten Gayle' sung by the songwriter. More details: http://force10gayle.com Photo by Khamkéo Vilaysing on Unsplash: https://unsplash.com/@mahkeo. LYRICS FOLLOW...

FORCE TEN GAYLE
Music & lyrics © Neil Bastian 2019

I blow in from the East
I blow in from the West
On a good day, I can make a hurricane seem second best
I blow in from the North
I blow in from the South
You won’t believe the sound that comes exploding from my mouth

I’m cooking up a storm
I’m raising merry hell
I’ll flatten all the trees and blow a hole through your hotel
And when I’ve been and gone
You’ll lie there, come the dawn
And shiver with delight or curse the day that you were born  
    	
I’m a force ten gale
Measured on the Beaufort Scale

And I’ll blast you from the past into the future
I’m a force ten gale
Over hill or sea or dale
And I’ll blow your trousers off, cos they don’t suit ya!

Oh I’m the only known typhoon that holds a tune
Yes, you could say that I’m a musical monsoon
When I strike, the only other thing worth knowing
Is you won’t know if you’re coming or you’re going!

I’m a force ten gale! 
And I’m filling up your sail
And I’ll make your ship come in, laden with treasure
I’m a force ten gale! 
You can plead to no avail
Just watch me while I strike you flat with pleasure!

Devastation’s at my tail
Watch those weathermen turn pale
Cos it’s time to tell the tale… of a force ten Gayle!

Force Ten Gayle - title song - demo sung by the writer

Alone on stage, Gayle sings at her devastation at having her career and romantic prospects dashed on the day of her 50th birthday. Then she remembers something that may give her hope for the future.

Guitar demo only - the show will have a full band arrangement.

Photo of empty hands by Jacek Dylag on 'Unsplash' (unsplash.com/@dylu)

There's Nothing Left

From the musical Force Ten Gayle. http://force10gayle.com/ Vocal: Charlie McCullagh. Piano: Edward Court. Produced by Edward Court.
https://soundcloud.com/charlie-mccullagh-768018422
https://edwardcourtmusic.com/
Photo Brandon Bishop: http://www.brandonbishopphotography.com/

ANOTHER STAR

Music and lyrics © Neil Bastian 2019

There’s plenty more fish in the sea
And plenty more rocks on the beach
And there’s hundreds and millions and billions of stars in the sky
For me to reach
Though one of those glittering stars
Has caused me nothing but sorrow
I swear there’s another one, shining for me
Lighting the way
To a brand-new tomorrow

There’s another star out there
That shines as bright as you
Another star out there
A sign that I’ll pull through
Another star to smile on me
Another star to hear my plea
Another star that’s sparkling just out of view
It’s just got to be true

I guess that we’ve been here before
But this time I’m changing my tack
This boy’s not for turning
Determinedly burning the bridges at his back
I swear there’ll be somewhere to go
As the day is distantly dawning
Oh, there must be a spark in the heavens above
That’s lighting the way  
To a blissful new morning

There’s another star out there
That shines as bright as you
Another star out there
A sign that I’ll pull through
Just like the star of Bethlehem
It’s brighter than the rest of them
It’s guiding the ships on the sea
It’s pointing the way to be free

There’s another life out there
Waiting just for me
Another life, I’ve no doubt it’s there
Somewhere, where I can be	  
Another place for me to roam
Another place to call my home
I’ll be taken there by a light
That shines from afar:       
Another star
Another star!

'Another Star' sung by Charlie McCullagh

Jason has just discovered he's adopted. From the musical Force Ten Gayle. force10gayle.com Vocal: Charlie McCullagh. Piano: Edward Court. Produced by Edward Court.
@charlie-mccullagh-768018422
edwardcourtmusic.com/
Photo Brandon Bishop: http://www.brandonbishopphotography.com/

WHO AM I NOW? (ADOPTION SONG)

Music and lyrics © Neil Bastian 2019

Room is spinning, stomach churning
Oh my God
Oh my God

Mind is racing, mem’ries, erasing
Fam’ly’s all been a fraud

I knew who I was when you read me a story at bedtime
I knew who I was when you packed me a lunchbox for school
I knew who I was back when none of those days seemed like dead time
A freckly lad with a Mom and a Dad
But now I’m just going mad

Who am I now? Who am I now?
Who am I now? Who am I now?
Who am I now? Who am I now?
Who am I now? Who am I now?
Who am I now? Who am I now?

My folks are all phony, my life is a fake
My mem’ries are fading like photographs hung in the hall
All of them

A Christmas in Primrose, those trips to the lake
The mem’ries are spinning in circles that peak and then fall
Fall

It’s the when and the where and the why
And the lie after lie after lie
It’s the why and the when and the how
It’s the “Who the hell am I now”?

Who am I now? Who am I now?
Who am I now? Who am I now?
Who am I now? Who am I now?
Who am I now? Who am I now?
Who am I now? Who am I now?

Mem’ries melting in the rain
They’re all dissolving down the drain
Those mem’ries melting in the rain

Who am I now? Who am I now?
Who am I now? Who am I now?
Who am I now? Who am I now?
Who am I...   now?

Who Am I Now? (Adoption Song) sung by Charlie McCullagh

An American Werewolf in London
Music/lyrics © Neil Bastian 2019
Moon image by Mike Petrucci: unsplash.com/@mikepetrucci
 
When the doleful toll of the Big Ben bell
Strikes its midnight knell		  
And the full moon casts its dreadful spell
You’ll find me raising hell

There’s a beast inside me
And it’s buried deep
There’s a beast inside me
And it’s sound asleep
It’s in hibernation
Huddled in its keep
But when the moon’s up in the sky 
I become a diff’rent guy
To the demon deep inside me, life is cheap

It’s a new companion
And it’s growing strong
And its claws are in me
And they’re growing long
All the plans I dreamed of
Have become undone	
So pray for little me
Cos it seems I’m doomed to be
An American Werewolf in London

While you’re sipping on your Guinness 
In the Rose and Crown
Outside I’m on the rampage
I’m tearing up the town
While you blow upon your cocoa
In your dressing gown
Policemen armed with rifles
Line up to shoot me down
I leave a trail of tracks behind me
Printed in the mud	
When I wake up, I’m naked, I’m shaking
And covered in ...!

[SPOKEN] Oh my God, Jack was right. It’s happened again. 
Let me check the news. Okay...

Seems I’ve been seen
In Bethnal Green
And they heard me barking
In a place called… Barking
And along The Strand
They found a severed hand
‘N down in Downing Street
They found a pair of feet

A marauding menace
In Little Venice
Today in Wimbledon
The last thing on their mind… is tennis
Two nuns in Putney
I turned them both to chutney
And in Kensington Gore
Need I say more?

I made my mark
In a place called ‘South Wark’
Seems I appal ‘em
In a place called Bal-ham
They found a knee bone
In a street in Mary Le Bone
And in Leicester Square...
Well let’s not go there

I’m an American werewolf in London
And my plans for future happiness have all become undone
An American werewolf in London
But whatever I get up to, I’m still my mother’s son
I represent my country in a most atrocious way
God bless the good ol’ US of A

This ain’t no Scooby Doo cartoon
I’m really howling at the moon
It gives a fella pangs to know
Each night he’ll sprout new fangs
I don’t think I can cope
I’m a hairy, scary lycanthrope:
‘An American Werewolf in London’
That’s how I’d bill myself
But to kill the beast inside me
I’m gonna have to...   oh my God…

An American Werewolf in London

Ghost light photo Carlos de Miguel: https://unsplash.com/@carlosdma
Lyrics below...

WE'LL BE THERE - Music & lyrics © Neil Bastian 2020

When they closed all the playhouses down
And the music halls were silenced all across the town
I could feel my poor heart breaking			
For the magic we were making
When they closed all the playhouses down

Oh, the stage seems bewildered by the silence
And the gods up in the circle seem to sit and sigh
Cos the orchestra’s abandoned
There’s no music on the stand and there’s no
Songs floating up to the fly

But there’s a light still burning in the deepest, darkest night
It’s the ghost light shining soft and true  
And though the day we’re all yearning for is just beyond our sight
When it comes we’ll all be there to sing for you!

Yes, we’ll be there in the light on that fateful grateful night
We’ll be there, ev’ry Jack and Jill and Joe
When we’ve turned this painful page 	
We’ll return to take the stage
We’ll be there to go on with the show

Oh we’ll be there on that night and we’ll sing with all our might
We’ll be there, ev’ry Molly, Mick an’ Mo
We’ll return to take the stage
Cos it’s how we earn our wage
We’ll be back to work the only way we know

Oh there’s a bright guiding light to illuminate the night
And it shines with a steady, golden glow
And we’ll tell you this for certain
When they raise that crimson curtain
We’ll be there
Yes we’ll be there
We’ll all be there
To go on with the show

We'll Be There (Ghost Light)- sung by the writer

LYRICS BELOW. From new musical 'The Mayfly Man', performed at Signal 9 - thank you Adam Lenson Productions: https://alpmusicals.com Seven Hills Films: http://sevenhillsfilms.com Max on Spotlight: https://spotlight.com/6217-9053-6368 Mayfly Man website: http://mayflyman.com BAND: Tamara Saringer (MD & piano): https://www.tamarasaringer.com Curtis Volp (guitar): https://www.instagram.com/curtisvolp/?hl=en Phil Donnelly (bass): http://www.phildonnelly.com Becky Brass (drums): https://www.beckybrass.com BACKING VOCS: Caitlyn Burt: https://www.performingmiracles.com.au Amir Shoenfeld: https://www.amirshoenfeld.com/ Max pic © Nicholas Dawkes: https://www.nicholasdawkesphotography.co.uk/

BARNABY'S LAMENT (The Mayfly Man)
Music and lyrics © Neil Bastian 2020

BARNABY: They say that I’m some kind of freak
They say that I’m somehow unique
I’m just being me 
But by just being me
They tell me my future looks bleak
They say there’s a thing called a “day”
Then they mumble and just look away
They say it’s a shame 
So they gave me a name
On this rainy grey Monday in May

They call me “The Mayfly Man”
And they greet me with sorrow
Poor little Mayfly Man
Cos I won’t see a day called “tomorrow”
My life has a limited span
But I’m doing the best that I can
They say that my fame
Needs a mem’rable name
So they call me “The Mayfly Man”
    
My parents are both in a state
They say I’m a victim of fate
I don’t understand
I feel perfectly grand
But they say that the day’s getting late
I wish I could prove to my Mam
That I’m happy the way that I am
But the journalists came
And they gave me a name
Oh the newspapers don’t give a damn

They call me “The Mayfly Man”
And they’re all going crazy
“The Marvellous Mayfly Man”
When I’d rather just ponder a daisy
My life has a limited span 
But I’m doing the best that I can
They made it their aim
To bestow me a name
I’m “The Marvellous Mayfly Man”

Why is ev’rybody so concerned about tomorrow?
They seem to think it’s something I should beg for, steal or borrow
They say that my existence has no reason and no rhyme
But is it really such a crime 
To be running out of time?

Now they say there’s a cure for my ills
They don’t know if it’s potions or pills
Heading east there’s a man in a van
Who we’ll catch if we possibly can   
They say he can ease my disease
They say that the cure is Chinese
As the traffic goes thundering by
See the Barnaby fans waving “hi”
Just watch them singing:

SUPPORTERS: Fly, Barnaby, fly!
Like an arrow through the sky
Fly, Barnaby, fly!
You’re a wonderful, wonderful guy
Fly, Barnaby, fly!
Cos we don’t want you to die
Try little Barnaby, [PARENTS: My little Barnaby] 
Fly little Barnaby, fly!

BARNABY: They call me The Mayfly Man
And they greet me with sorrow
“The Marvellous Mayfly Man”
And I’m chasing a day called tomorrow
My life has a limited span 
So I’m doing the best that I can!
     
ALL: Try little Barnaby! [PARENTS: My little Barnaby!] 
Fly… Fly…Fly…little Barnaby: fly!

The Mayfly Man (Barnaby's Lament)- sung by Max Alexander-Taylor

Jordan on Spotlight: https://www.spotlight.com/9171-1277-0641
Music & lyrics Neil Bastian: http://neilbastian.com
Watch the On Hope Song Cycle: http://www.mptheatricals.co.uk/on-hope
Thank you to The Other Palace: https://lwtheatres.co.uk/whats-on/on-...
Jordan headshot by https://www.theheadshotbox.co.uk/

TINY LITTLE TARDIGRADE

Music & lyrics © Neil Bastian 2020

I see you down the barrel of my microscope
You’re magnified right there upon the slide
They told us to investigate the way you cope
With diff’rent kinds of pressure from outside

So cancel all appointments that you made today
It’s time to test your mettle and your pride
Our scientific plans can’t be delayed today
We’ll see if you can take things in your tiny little stride

Tardigrade, oh, tardigrade
A millimeter long
Tardigrade, oh, tardigrade
You’ve never done me wrong
It’s just my job, don’t be dismayed
Commands are made to be obeyed
I’m getting paid to rain on your parade

We popped you in the oven 
And we turned it way up high
You didn’t even seem to break a sweat
We froze you in the ice cube tray
But all you did was shout ‘hooray’
It seems you give as good as you can get 

Tardigrade, oh, tardigrade
I’m must say I’m impressed
In fahrenheit or centigrade
You passed the opening test
But pressure deep down in the sea
Will prove too much, I guarantee
We’ll soon see who’s ‘to be or not to be’

We took you to the scene
In a yellow submarine
A devastating dive
But we brought you back alive
Nomatter how we strive
You always seem to thrive
You came back singing ‘I Will Survive’

And even when we blasted you up into outer space
The radiation couldn’t make you frown
We stuck you in a vacuum
But you soon came roaring back you must be  
Tougher than the toughest guy in town!
 
Tardigrade, oh tardigrade
You’ve taught me how to cope
My darling said it’s over 
And I nearly gave up hope   
The more and more I study you
The more I’m sure we’ll see it through
Your reputation’s made
Your dream will never fade
I’m singing you this crazy serenade
Nobody’s gonna rain on your parade!

Tiny Little Tardigrade - sung by Jordan Castle

Sung live online by Aitch Wylie with lyrics delivered 15 mins before the show (Signal Online by Adam Lenson Productions) LYRICS ARE BELOW THESE CREDITS
Aitch Wiley (vocal): https://twitter.com/AitchWylie
Curtis Volp (lead guitar): https://instagram.com/curtisvolp/?hl=en
The Mayfly Man musical: https://mayflyman.com
Adam Lenson Productions: https://alpmusicals.com/
Seven Hills Films: http://www.sevenhillsfilms.com/
Neil Bastian: https://neilbastian.com 

I'M GONNA MAKE YOU A MAN
Music & lyrics © Neil Bastian 2020

Oh there’s a feeling risin’ in the sky
A reelin’ feelin’, feel it flyin’ high
All round the world
From Mogadishu to Milan

Oh there’s a future waiting to arrive 
it’s gonna suit ya, make ya feel alive
And there’s a girl 
Who’ll make it happen if she can
So put aside the childish toys of a boy
I’m gonna make you a man!

I’m gonna turn you upside down, they’ll hear the sound all over town
Gonna make you feel so grand, that you’ll demand to wear a crown
Gonna make you wind up happier than how you first began
Throw a blanket on the floor of the van
I’m gonna make you man

Gonna make you a man if I can (and I can)
So embrace your only destiny
I’m a Barnaby fan, in a van, with a plan 
So surrender to me

Oh you’re a time bomb ready to explode
You’re like a miner who’s hit the motherlode
And I’m a girl who’ll make it happen if she can

Oh there’s a feelin risin’ in the sky 
A reelin’ feelin’, feel it flyin’ high

The time is ridin’ by according to plan
It’s always travellin’ as fast as it can
It’s been the way it is since records began

Prepare for me to make ya
I hope it doesn’t break ya
I’ll shake the lemonade in your can

I’m gonna make you a man
I’m gonna make you a man
I’m gonna make you a man
I’m gonna make you a …..

SPOKEN: Wear this* and don’t tell your Mam.

(*condom)

I'm Gonna Make You A Man - Aitch Wylie

Photo by Gahan N Rao https://unsplash.com/@gahanrao

Troubled Soul - (demo sung by writer)

The opening number from 'The Mayfly Man'. Mix by Max-Alexander Taylor. Watch the video at http://mayflyman.com

THE BALLAD OF BARNABY MAY
Music & lyrics © Neil Bastian 2020
From new musical 'The Mayfly Man'

Consider the mayfly
Born to live for a day
The length of a day flies by
Then it’s time to vanish away
But what’s true for the tiniest mayfly
Has come true for a poor little boy
It’s hard to disguise our rising surprise
He’s growing before our own eyes!

Poor little Barnaby May
He’s living his life in a day
It started at dawn when this baby was born
He smiled in a curious way
They say today kids grow up quick
But Barnaby’s taking the Mick!
By midnight he’ll die of old age, the poor guy
The clock on the wall’s going tick, tock, tick tock, tick tock, tick

They call him the Mayfly Man!
Poor little Mayfly Man!
He’s growing from cradle to grave in the space of a day! (Only a day?!)
Mayfly Man!
Poor little mayfly Man!
Is there anyone out there alive with the power to save him?

He’s aging alarmingly fast
By lunchtime his childhood is past
By afternoon tea he’s at least thirty three
His parents are watching aghast (We’re aghast!)
By ev’ning his hair will be grey
And the curtain will fall on his play
He’s sprouting before us
So join in our chorus
Poor little Barnaby May

Barnaby May! (Mayfly Man!)
Barnaby May! (Poor little Mayfly Man!)
He’s growing from cradle to grave in the space of a day!
Barnaby May! (Mayfly Man!)
Barnaby May! (Poor little Mayfly Man!)
Is there anyone out there alive with the power to save him?
(Save him, save him, save him!)
 
Can anyone save my baby?
Can anyone cure our son?
We're praying that possibly maybe there’s someone
Who’ll save our son
 
From Barry to Botany Bay
We’ve all heard of Barnaby May
His future is fading away
Perhaps he needs vitamin A?
His story's a cause for dismay
Was it nature that made him this way?
He drew his first breath
On the day of his death
So let’s pray
Won’t you pray?
Let us pray
For Barnaby May!

Pray for my baby!

The Ballad Of Barnaby May

From the musical http://www.force10.gayle

LYRICS:

Standing in a bar-room basement
Strumming on a cheap guitar
Wondering if I could be the kinda guy 
To get his songs sung by a star
But no-one leaves a note at my casement
No-one ever throws me a bone
I send out my tunes, set them free like balloons
But no-one ever picks up the phone

I write the songs nobody wants to sing
Just like a bell nobody wants to ring
My faith in music’s hanging on by a string
I write the songs nobody wants to sing

Some of them are stories of passion
Some are just a howl of pain
Some of them are victims of fashion
Stranded in the pouring rain
See them all suspended in silence
Clinging to the lines of a stave
I’ve got to believe that some fabulous diva 
Will ride to the rescue and save them

Who’ll sing the songs nobody wants to sing?
Who’ll ring the bell nobody’s willing to ring?
Who’ll bring that thing no other singer can bring?
Who’ll sing the songs nobody wants to sing?

The songs nobody sings are lying scattered all around me
I don’t know where they came from
But somehow they just found me
The songs nobody sings are lined up waiting in the wings
Who’ll right the wrongs of the songs nobody sings?

I ain’t asking for Streisand
I ain’t asking for Bassey			
Just a fire in her eyes and
A voice the size of Tallahassee

I’ll catch my breath as you begin to sing
To sing the songs nobody’s willing to sing
You’ll make me prouder than the carnival king
Make these the songs somebody wants to sing
Just bring me your voice
Let the whole world rejoice in the songs
Nobody wants to sing

The Songs Nobody Sings - Max Alexander-Taylor

More songs on http://www.youtube.com/neilbastian

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