Hung out with Gabe and played a few tracks on radioactive I been listening to recently. Was nice, lovely guy.

Mash up of different stuff, Future, Fka Twigs, Congi, Yazmin Lacey, Four tet, Radioactive man, Flying Lotus, etc.

Maybe it's kinda dumb me to chuck this up, but yeah I'll probs listen to it if no one else does.

Nicks 1st I cant Dj Mix. xx

Made this song years ago, thought it should see the light of day.
Rapping over a beat by poptartbeat... I think, lol. I lost the original file. Damn I love that joint he's got with Quelle Chris, cool skateboarder too.

Asthmatic Family

The Price Of Happiness (a Dream I Had)

Rapping over a Subdaio Instrumental - G.
 
Lyrics: 

I been around the block 
prolly more than I should

talking like I know whats good
I don’t, I’m not
I'm just mentally ill
doing what I can keep popping the pill
talking to the doc just google what to say
Im a fake. Its the truth
I don’t even care what I’m saying no more
wanna get so faded that I wake up on the floor
its the truth, the oath, the suits and ties
walk round town with their outfit lies
fake smile and them crimson skies
stutter in my sentence when I stumble into work
got death on my breath when I’m talking to my bestie
but all he be smelling is the whiskey
heading for another disciplinary.
I’m feeling
out of my my head
its been so long since the moon has shone
I’m feeling like my tanks on empty
felling like I’m still not ready
Im feeling like
hotel lobby
2 stars in the dark
Starved,
thinking about my past
I never fucking said that I was just a good guy
I’m nigh, not, just cooking in the pot
running from these demons they be fucking with my head
just another day in bed 
staring at my phone while I wonder why my home at?

Quiet Darkly - Mental Health Crisis

Link to the acapella if anyone wants it, sorry for rough quality I'm a noob. 

https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/14pHyYx__hTTCtdOt0ODel2FbpKAfXER_?usp=sharing

Lyrics:

I'm so fucking done with these dumb politicians
Acting like they right  when they really just white 
A product of environment  I'm talking about entitlement 
Mouth full of words but you ain't saying nothing
Acting pretty tough but you don’t stand for nothing

You’re standing  with the soldiers of Satan
bBowing up pagers
While you call  yourselves saviours

You’re a dog, you’re a rat  you are worse than a snitch
If you come around here  I’ll lay you down in a ditch

If you’ve got the tools  but you don't hand them out  
your complicit with the man 
Get your hand out the mouth
Of the kid who is trying to live

Your too busy trying to act right
When ya really should worry about your life  
worry bout your kids man worry bout your wife
Cos one of these days I'ma run up in the night 
Or the middle of the day
Come strapped with the gat
And you will catch a fade 
You will get laid
Out in the street 
Or strung up in a tree 
While I'm standing  under street lights
Like, 
Free Gaza 
Waving the flag   

Your complicit in a system that feeds off  the poor and weak 
Eat the meek  
Wolf acting like  the shepherd of sheep 
Sewing seeds of  the fear and doubt
Did at all for the gram accolades of clout  

Wait a second, You’re still politicking?
Snapchatting little girls  on another school tour   
or pissing on ya colleagues face
The paper cut out
There's no doubt-
The side of history I'm on 

I'm bombing on the city 
Your pretending to be ya ex
Sexting on tinder 
Acting like a regular
Elected representative  
Complaining about some snowflake shit
triggered by a green haired girl talking about inequities 
But ya don't even care  for white collar criminals 
out committing felonies 

I'm talking about decency
common human dignity
little bit of integrity 
Standing on business  
Is knowing who u wanna be 
Not acting like a parody 

Learn respect  for you lose your neck  
think twice  before you cash the cheque.


Acting like you better than me 
Your not better than most
If it's class warfare then I'll turn you to toast.

David Seymour Freestyle

Just wanted to chuck up this d33j mix cos I realised it's not on soundcloud anymore and I'm a big fan of it.

JunkHead-Space prod bs5uk

This life is just a candle  
walking in a shadow 
of death
it’s days 
 like these 
this world is thin to me
the air I breath is hot coal dust
entering into my lungs
expanding 
it’s hot
and sticky
it fills my chest so far
my heart 
bursts to a thousand pieces 
falling from the sky
Another shooting star
For some young boy

To see,
 and dream 
of a kiss hell never get 
the taste of a love he'll never really know 
he goes
and grows
And gets so fucking old 
until  a deep  sadness slowly seeps
down 
dripping
into his life the same 
the thousandth time 
alone in bed again
waking from his sleep
a healing light has fallen
gently on his wall and 
reflections of a moment, 
a knowingness. 

I was always alone and forever I will be 
but, i never forgot that feeling ,
when 
I saw 
your face for the first time  and i turned to butterflies
It pains me to say 
I hate when You leave 
But 
I guess it's just the same and it always will be 
A moment lasts forever even if you didn't  take it 
The love is still real even if you didn't make it
and I think I might have cried when I realised...

All the times and the times and the times..
That I just passed by.
I think about the boy with his hopes and his dreams in the sky
the stars and the moon and the whole world
looking down. 
Im looking up.
I laugh when I see them
And I smile as i wave, 
Good bye.

-------------------------------------------------------------

gonna make a lil video to accompany it soon.

Butterflies.

instrumental ripped from shlo's rarities ep

Visual: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m34lzNzBf68&feature=youtu.be

Lyrics:

A punch line with a presumption
I presume 
this room
is really just a tomb for my satisfaction.
I act so cool but i’m really just good
at acting 
pushing you button just another reaction
hanging with the crew 
got the crooks wit my truth
feeling so blue when I’m high on the shrooms
and Im really not sure what i see when I stare
so
i just stare through

chilling with the girl 
when she in another world 
stuck up on her phone
might as well as be gone
running from her home life
ex boy calling her the new wife
it was nice for a while
watched the fade in her smile
heads like helium
can’t keep the feeling in

so, i stare
looking at a flower
when it blossoms 
but its not

threw it in the dirt
compost
with the rot

staring at the stars
they stuck up in my nose
filled with  the snot
I know what i got
and i aint got shit but these balls in my hand
and 
i don’t know shit but im one with the land 
and
everything seems relevant I’m staring at this halogen
a mind full of fear
this girly she be playing
she stroking on my hair
cos I be so far when i seem so near
gazing when  i stare
the light when it falls
it flaunts n twists and turns
in a dance or a breeze
still
these trees aint staying still
so
I’m really not sure cos it doesn’t make sense       
In a sense 
I knew it from the start
the only heart I ever had I threw it on the ground.
I pray to god that someone else will find what I have lost.

cos

I really don’t know       
if she can’t remember 
the things that we said,
the times that we had.
I had to leave but I can’t forget you
I had to leavebut im glad I met you
had to leave but im glad.

So, we made
a promise with the stars
the love was in her scars
floating on a cloud
we fell to the ground
as we shattered into pieces 
we didn’t make a sound

and then
I left.

the lonely stoner

A loosie rap I made over lockdown about an actual dream I had the night before my last exam when I was still at Medical School. 

The line "I dive in and feel death under it" was actually a line I remember being repeated throughout the dream.

Shoutout to Hunter Jackson for mixing it for me.

Lyrics:

crackle in my joints 
as i settle into bed  can’t sleep on my back
 so i creep through my head 
thinking of my lost lovers 
the promise of a smile
 late nights, on the phone 
vertebrae twisting
 night terrors, looming  
her face is on the wall  n she watching me fall
 into the ground 
 there’s water all around n 
its dimly lit in the pale moonlight 
 the preachers preaching 
“I dive in and feel death under it” 
feels so thunderous
 tear drops dripping 
water won’t stop  
rising up past my knees 
darkness all around in this crease i be in.
 nothing above
 just a distant green light 
and the feeling of the end

 it fades to black  
im falling back  
into my body
 as im waking from the dream 
my heart beats racing 
hearing the words  still talking in my head
im not so sure  it mirage or a dream 
things to come
 a memory of a past life
 or another dimension 
things i should know 
all the lessons i ignored 
reflections on the glass 
not sure where to stare  
there’s fog on the road  
but i think i found hope
 so  I take it in my stride
 new change in my stance 
not sad 
no sentence  can describe

  the feeling of belief on your deathbed.

quiet darkly

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