you'll watch the love leave my eyes again

deathtrap (arey)

i see u everywhere i walk now w/ sideview drive (prod jolst + innsmouth)

this time it won't fix

https://soundcloud.com/heylog
https://soundcloud.com/imcaves
https://soundcloud.com/irby314

you made me feel nauseous 
i keep getting sick
can't remember where it started 
can't forget all that you did to me
you tasted so bittersweet 
i still see you every time i sleep
i gave you every part of me 
i bet you couldn't tell
i fall in love with narcissists,
don't care about myself
i just go through sedatives
keep fucking up my health 
what's the point of heaven,
i already live in hell

it's not easier 
i'll lie and say it is 
i gave up on getting better 
it's just the way it is
i've been feeling numb ever since i was a kid 
i don't wanna die,
but i don't wanna try and live

i said that i loved you 
(save me)
i gave you the blood from my skin
i tried everything
admit it
it's hard but i did it
you left me too damaged 
this time it won't fix

[heylog]
i'm calling for you 
are you with someone else
the pics on my phone
are nowhere to be found 
would it surprise you 
if i took myself
i might just die here
when no ones around
but i made a choice 
that i regret 
stomp out the house
from what i said
and now it's too late to apologize
fumbled my words,
i guess this is goodbye 

i wish i did better 
thinking all the time 
baby it's whatever
see you in the next life
i'm trying to forget her 
but god it feels impossible
now she's just a number 
floating in my phone
i wish i did better 
thinking all the time 
i don't make any sense
and it makes me wanna cry 
but i look like im stupid
and she say that it's fine 
girl you're pretty funny 
tell another lie

it's not getting easier (w/ heylog) (prod. caves & irby)

harder than it seems w/ sace6 (noahmadethiss x sace6)

everything to me ft. days to waste

Getting Even

superstar (noahmadethiss+jolst)

mocha's song w/ jomie (p. niles forester + alexoso)

body going missing

prod: https://soundcloud.com/block-tane https://soundcloud.com/nate2timezz
 
i can hear my own heartbeat
pound in this quiet
hands bound back
with this rope
he'll tie me up
(i can hear my own heartbeat pounding
i can hear my own heartbeat pounding)
i can feel the cold concrete
laying down, crying
itching through scabs
to be whole is all i want
(i can hear my own heartbeat pounding
i can hear my own heartbeat pounding)
open me up
god willing i'll make it
your shirt soaking with blood
oh, my body keep shaking
place my flesh upon a sigil
brand with my initials
this night will make me whole again
the embers start to whistle
nothing left, no one to hold me
bloody ceremony
i will lose control again,
the heavens will disown me

please, please
it's all that i have
(like magician, body going)

like magician,
body going missing
bloodied up my palms
baby i feel like a christian
just how i envisioned
prep for the incision
pierce right through my heart
until my fingers finish twitching
oh yeah,
i think i like it, i don't wanna pretend
i'm fucking begging for it
cut me again
and again, and again, and again
and again

(let us pray, let us wish
to partake in communion,
let us partake in communion,
and feast upon the old blood)

where i'm going
i won't make it back
hope he's waiting for me
vision going black
nothing i have left will make it past
open me up
god willing i'll make it
your shirt soaking with blood
oh my body keeps shaking
keeps shaking


paleblood

I wish I’d met you when
You’d run down alleys
And back again
I wish I’d met you when
Time had no tallies
No guardian 

[Chorus] 
I could have been
At your shoulder
I could have been 
Between you and him
I volunteer to be your soldier 
Burn as your Seraphim 
I’ll worship you as promised
Forgiven and admonished 
Cos I was never there 
Forever remained 
The empty chair 
The empty stare
Cos I was never there 

I wish I’d met you when 
You cried in corners 
Without a friend 
I wish I’d met you when 
You hated you 
Scratching at your skin 

[Chorus] 
I could have been
At your shoulder
I could have been 
Between you and him
I volunteer to be your soldier 
Burn as your Seraphim 
I’ll worship you as promised
Forgiven and admonished 
Cos I was never there 
Forever remained 
The empty chair 
The empty stare
Cos I was never there

[Bridge] 
I was only down the road 
So close 
So close
So close 
But it might have been the nearest star 
So far 
So far 
So far

[Cello break] 

I wish I’d met you when 
You bathed the kids 
And I worked instead 
So glad I met you when 
The midnight coats
Were beckoning 
At the stroke of midnight 
The dying moments of eighty-seven 
You became my Cherubim
Arriving at our private heaven 

[Chorus] 
I could have been
At your shoulder
I could have been 
Between you and him
I volunteer to be your soldier 
Burn as your Seraphim 
I’ll worship you as promised
Forgiven and admonished 
Cos I was never there 
Forever remained 
The empty chair 
The empty stare
Cos I was never there


Getting Even

noah thomas

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