Lyrics Below

*Behind the scenes
What up people!?!? For the background music on this poem I found the audio while playing video games! haha smh, right?? Anyway, it's the intro song for Final Fantasy X/X-2 HD Remaster, which is a game I loved when I was kid and am still in love with now, but it is altered. What I had to do was find the right big chunk to loop so I could extend the song somehow. Then I had to figure out how to cut the track up and move everything around so it would all fit together nicely. It was a good learning experience and I'm glad you are all here to share my growth with me! I've learned so much since I started recording and I know there's still so much to learn. Honestly, I've barely scraped the surface!! I've got nothing but love and respect for all of you! That goes for my good friends, n s miles7, k c harding, 5th Stone, anyone who's down with truth and improvement and last but not least, every single living noun!  
Peace


"The edge of the fuscia sky cries one last goodnight as the sun ducks behind the mountains, I wonder why with a heavy sigh, why don't beautiful moments last, good times don't stick around they fade into the past, soon the sky goes black but it's quickly peppered with burning gas, we call them stars, we disassociate because they're too far away, like the dreams we throw away, the fears we won't face, we think we're lame but we're all great in our own way, but like the lottery you gotta play to win right, you get out what you put in so fight sin, don't sandbag to blend with friends, transcend your generation and take them, take as many as you can to salvation, so tired of temporary elation, so tired of our corrupt nation, the news is nothing other than rapid fire depression, they'll take you down if you let them, but they only gain power when it's given, I won't give in to their scare tactics, you'll see a bear do backflips first, this is my curse, this is why I want the hearse, and this is just one verse, and one I released, if you could see what I write in peace you'd wonder how I haven't shot the breeze if you know what I mean, gone in a gust of wind, I win...
I'm a sight unseen, don't worry about keeping my hands clean when I help those in need, the ones down in the dumps, or the slums, whatever you want to call it, we all need help like alcoholics from time to time, got to drop bad habits and start stacking dimes, make enough to get by, the rest comes from inside, inside every single living thing is something waiting to be seen, something so serene but silent like lights without the sirens, we all know it's there but we're scared so distractions are blared, making you content without a care till that day you lose your hair and wonder where, where did my life go, where is my Bible, am I liable, could've stood tall like the Eiffel but the allure of psychos pulled me in, I gave them my power, I gave in..."

-Troy Tapia (Noctivagent) 

Thoughts...

LYRICS:
I once knew a man, Christian name was Jim.
Jim was slim, a buck 20, stood 5 foot 10.
At times, he got lonely, his mind turned on him.
He sits inside at night, planning out when.
Where and how his act will play out.
He feels like he should just end it all now.
"Nothing makes sense, life is just too complicated."
His only wish, to live life and never hate it.
"I just can't do this anymore" he tells himself.
People always tell him, at least you got your health,
"Man, Fuck That!" He proclaims at the top of his lungs,
"I'd rather be blind, deaf and even dumb,
At least if I was dumb, the pain would be numb."
He tells himself, lying in the gutter like a bum.
Kicked out the bar, too drunk to go far.
Drowns his life in alcohol the courts took his car.
(In other words)
He can't drive, got one too many DUIs.
He can't seem to dry, the tears caught in his eyes.
Takin a walk down memory lane, in his brain.
"Maybe I'm insane but I am not to blame!
This world turned me into the man that I am,
Like any little boy, man I had a master plan.
But something went wrong, I took a wrong turn.
Along this long, winding road of turbulance," as an ambulance now goes smashin by.
He looks up to the sky and asks God why.
"Why would you curse my life, full of such pain n strife.
Nobody loves me, nope, not even my wife!
I should just be on my way, lie down and die."
But for now, Jim slowly closes his eyes....

(C'mon Jim... C'mon)

He awakens to a cop, nudging him by foot,
Sits up, his face in his hands he puts.
Realizes its an officer waking him up,
Regains conscious, and runs toward a truck.
The cop let him go, but little did he know,
Jim had troubles like a pimp with no hoe.
He's broke, with no job, and freshly divorced,
"How could my life have taken such course!?
Tell me Lord, please send me a sign!!"
He cries out to God, his life's on the line.
Constantly stuck in the back of his mind,
Contemplating how to clock-out for the last time.
On the way home Jim stops at the store,
Picks up a bottle, a blunt, and a Magnum 44.....

(Damn....)

Finally home, Jim takes a shot n blunt to the dome,
Sitting all alone, thinkin bout life...blown.
shot after shot the liquor starts to pile up,
from the bottle to the dome no chaser no cup.
He starts to fumble around with the bullets that he bought,
"This'll be easy,"
He sat and he thought.
"Since living life for me is so mothafuckin hard,
Left me with nothin but emotional scars."
Jim grabs the gun and puts it right up to his temple
Thinkin
Can it be that it was all so simple,
"Just pull the damn trigger! You know that you can!
Don't be a pussy! For once be a man!
Time to man up and pull this damn trigger."
He pulls it...the gun's not loaded, go figure.
(So he) grabs a shiny bullet and he loads up his revolver,
"Time to play russian roulette with my problem solver."
Walks back to the bathroom, gun and bottle in hand,
Sees his reflection, but doesn't see a man.
Lookin in the mirror at the whites of his eyes,
Spins the barrel twice, pulls the trigger,
And dies.....

Main beat done by Jurd Beats
All lyrics, effects, recording and mastering by Noctivagent


Jim's Song

I had to just go in this one! 
I love you with all my heart for listening

Beat created by The Philharmonik

Sacramento CA

Letter 2 Myself

I love you for listening 

Beat by The Philharmonik

Sacramento CA
Woodland CA

Let The Horn Speak

The Big Picture

Apathetic Epidemic

The Damned Dance

Hit me with a message, let's converse!
Noctivagent@Gmail.com


Bio:
Troy Tapia a.k.a. Noctivagent, or Noc for short, is a published poet and aspiring Hip Hop artist. He is new on the scene and looking to make waves. His Hip Hop has been compared to socially conscious, old school and sometimes political styles. His recorded spoken word poetry is typically laid over what can best be describe as a score or composition. Through both his Hip Hop lyrics and poetry he uses a lot of pungent, poignant themes and can be best described as socially conscious and extremely heartfelt. Noc resides in and comes from the Sacramento area of California, in Yolo County. Contact Noc at Noctivagent@gmail.com or find him on social media everywhere.
Soundcloud.com/noctivagent
Noctivagent.bandcamp.com
Facebook.com/noctivagent
Instagram.com/noctivagent
Twitter.com/noctivagent

Noctivagent

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