song about how friends, the one closest that see you in love and hear you at your lowest, hurt you and break your heart worse than a lover. 


(Verse 1)
skies of pink purple and yellow too
the color of your aura
according to the silly tests we do
i’ve never met somebody like you

ive never felt so understood
when i tell you about stories
i never told anybody else
darling you really are something else

(Chorus)
no one breaks your heart quite like a friend
they hold all your secrets and the time you spent
i’ve never met somebody
who made me feel this loved
now you’re just a stranger all over again
cuz no one breaks your heart quite like a friend

(Verse 2)
it’s not like we fought about something small
hell i hardly remember ever fighting at all

once upon a december day
i saw it had been several months since you and i last spoke
even over the phone

(Chorus)
no one breaks your heart quite like a friend
they hold all your secrets and the time you spent
i’ve never met somebody
who made me feel this loved
now you’re just a stranger all over again
cuz no one breaks your heart quite like a friend

like a friend full draft

About being scared for a picket fence life but not being happy. 


(Verse 1)
I got a job
I got two kids
I’ve got a boyfriend
Not a husband

I sit alone
During lunch
history repeats itself

(instrumental)

(Verse 2)
so how are you?
achieved anything?
are you happy?
are living or are you surviving?

Tell me how you feel
do you feel anything at all

(Chorus)
I feel something
but i say nothing
scared to hurt your feelings

crawled up in a ball at night
wishing and waiting to be alright

i wish i didn’t feel this

(bridge)
am i gonna be alright?
i thought i was gonna be alright
thiught that everything was gonna be fine

(Chorus)
I feel something
but i say nothing
scared to hurt your feelings

crawled up in a ball at night
wishing and waiting to be alright

i wish i didn’t feel this

i wish i didn’t feel this draft

Issa cover innit. was recommended by my big toe

Sunflower by michele leigh aCouStiC SeT

shaky hands, hold my breath
in my head i count to ten
all the words, that you said
spinning circling in my head
my mind is a blaze
my body is the same

I’m in a bad headspace again

All the people in the room are talking at the same time
Conversation keeps going but I’m stuck on the same line

I’m in a bad headspace again
Zoning out on all the things being said
looking at the same spot on the wall
nobody even notices it at all
I’m in a bad headspace
Bad headspace again

Now I’m taking deep breaths to help me calm down
My racing heart is the cause of it all now
imagining a time and place where its not loud
before i know it i drown it all out

Why does it have to happen right now
Tryna live in the moment through it all now
Why does it have to happen right now
Right when I can’t let it all out

I’m in a bad headspace again
Zoning out on all the things being said
looking at the same spot on the wall
nobody even notices it at all
I’m in a bad headspace
Bad headspace again

Bad Headspace ( full bad draft )

i grew out of my body 
and broke all of my bones
i grew up way too fast
and it seems everybody noticed

i ran after the devil
and chased him with a knife
it’s not that i’m not scared of dying
but it makes me feel so alive

and i, don’t wish to be a kid
anymore
anymore
i, wish to grow up 
big and strong

and i guess, that’s why
everyone wishes to be
a kid again
a kid again
grew up way too fast
chasing after cash
and all the things we didnt understand

i grew out of my body
and broke all of my bones
never grew into the shoes and clothes
like i wanted to

i chased after death with a knife
and it made me feel so alive

and i, don’t wish to be a kid
anymore
anymore
i, wish to grow up 
big and strong

and i guess, that’s why
everybody wishes to be
a kid again
a kid again
grew up way too fast
chasing after cash
and all the things we didnt understand

Growth Spurt (Full bad draft)

the window has been open since you left
your bottle of water is still next to my bed
under the sheets its cold
and i dont have you to warm me up
and all thats been said, its what my mind is made of

this is not a goodbye
but a hi when i see you again
it was good while it lasted 
now its come to the end, credits
to both you and me
we played well together
we made a great team

great team (unfinished draft)

front door (unfinished draft)

we once had the world
a garden full of fruit trees
and plants growing berries
the world was ours

surrounded by green
and the clearest blue skies youve ever seen
warm sunshine
you’d leave for a week, you said

a week turned into months
months turned into years
now i’ve got the garden
and you’ve got the fruit


LYRICS

i hope the fruits taste good when you buy them in summer
you left to travel the world 
i travel in the garden
reminiscing about things that happened centuries ago
picking off the petals and letting them go


we once had the world
now we’ve got nothing
the fruit on the trees we’ve planted
are bruised and rotten
we once had a garden for the two of us
now it’s just me and the trees gathering dust 
we once had the world but the world wouldn’t have us

I hope the fruits taste bitter when you buy them in autumn
You’re baking goods for them like you used to do with me
Creating memories
Leaving out you and me
Blowing out the candles and watching the smoke go

now i hear your name all over town
something about
you’ve made it big, you’re celebrating now
you’ve been looking for me
how come i just heard it now?

a wife and a kid on the way
summering about near the bay
everything we dreamed off down the drain

i once had the world
now i’ve got nothing
our fruits, rotten and bruised
i had to close the garden
the soil must’ve been spoiled
i’m in the city now
working the same 9-5 job like you now
i’m not happy but i’m happy that at least 
you are happy now

We once had the world - dec 6th 2023.mp3

VERSE 1
I don’t like my surroundings
there are no mountains
and barely hills
i dont like my surroundings
everywhere i go is such a buzzkill
all i can do when i feel lonely is
walk up a little hill

PRE CHORUS
i dont like the food, for thought
the way it tastes, dont wanna waste
theres are so many places on earth that sound better 
but never good enough
 there’s no place on earth, i know of
that i’d rather be
take me to a place where i can hide for a moment
moment
moment

CHORUS
where do i go?
with no such place as home?
i am lost and nowhere to be found
no sense of direction
compass seems as confused
standing on the middle of the road
hope the satélites catches my phone
screaming from the top of my lungs
where do i go?

VERSE 2
I dont like my surroundings
where are the people
life of the party
seems a bit surreal
cant seem to blend in
i stick out like sore thumb
i feel so lonely
but at least im invited to a party

PRE CHORUS
i dont like the food, for thought
the way it tastes, dont wanna waste
theres are so many places on earth that sound better 
but never good enough
 there’s no place on earth, i know of
that i’d rather be
take me to a place where i can hide for a moment
moment
moment

CHORUS
where do i go?
with no such place as home?
i am lost and nowhere to be found
no sense of direction
compass seems as confused
standing on the middle of the road
hope the satélites catches my phone
screaming from the top of my lungs
where do i go?

BRIDGE
Where do i 
Where do i
Where do i go

i don’t like my surroundings
there are no mountains
and barely hills
i dont like my surroundings
everywhere i go is such a buzzkill
all i can do when i feel lonely is
walk up a little hill

Where do I go?

the neighborhood is so upset
i wonder what is going
on, inside, their heads
they’re up at night again 
yelling “lock him up”

who are they talking about
perfect eyes and a killer smile
who’s hiding in the, shadows.

everyone is asking 
“have you heard the news?
the suspect has a new muse,
here behind the shadows tonight 
the sirens will be ringing”

what are they talking about
perfect eyes and a killer smile
who’s hiding with me in the shadows
your coat is always heavy
the smoke you blow out makes me dizzy
am i gonna make it out alive

i know i shouldve trusted the
sirens, around your house
every night
too bad ive fallen victim for your lies
and butterflies
around your eyes

i know what they’re talking about
those perfect eyes and a killer smile
im a fallen victim
six feet under the ground

The neighborhood/Victim #5

princess in a tower
prince looking for her
why is that not my reality

born into money but not the power
yet the world was to become ours
You the king, and I the queen


You say I’m 
Too old for picture books
Too young for love
but i should, know
From right and wrong
But I do
Why dont you

I scream in pillows
and slam my fist
but the truth of the matter is
I was never old enough for this
No i was never old enough for thiiis


15 and choosing my future
dreams crushed, i am a loser
head on my neck, but mind far away

turned 17, 18, 19
all those years feel like a vague dream
i will never be old enough for this


You say I’m 
Too old for picture books
Too young for love
but i should, know
From right and wrong
But I do
Why dont you

I scream in pillows
and slam my fist
but the truth of the matter is
I was never old enough for this
No i was never old enough for thiiis

Too old for picture books
Too young for love
but i should, know
From right and wrong
But I do
Why dont you

Too old for picture books
Too young for love
but i should, know
From right and wrong
And I do
Why dont you


You say I’m 
Too old for picture books
Too young for love
but i should, know
From right and wrong
But I do
Why dont you

I scream in pillows
and slam my fist
but the truth of the matter is
We were never old enough for this
No we were never old enough for thiiis

Old enough

what was i made for? cover

I’m awkward and quiet
It seems you don’t mind it
You’ve been in my shoes
And I get distracted so easily 
But it seems like you really seem to understand me

I’m scared
I’m scared
Cuz now I’ve got someone to lose again
Now I’ve got something to ruin again

I romanticize every step in life
I’m sorry if I look at you with heart eyes
I’m trying my best but it seems to not be enough
I’m sorry if I mistake your kindness for love

Now I’m scared
I’m scared
Cuz now I’m about to lose you as a friend
Good going Teddy you ruined something again

Goodbye friend, hello heartbreak
To never see you again
I’ll never smile again cuz
I’ve fallen in love again

goodbye friend, hello heartbreak full draft

level 20 of life | she / hers | located in the netherlands

i’m a dramatic hopeless romantic and turn everything i do and don’t tell my therapist into a song with the chords i know and post it on here so it’s easier to share with friends.

find me on insta: nocturnalina

teddy & the nocturnal adventures

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