Well, I'm far too gone for any social please
And I crushed the odds but I'm far from free
Gotta find a way to sustain
This numb feeling cause' it's always

In my head again
when I'm feeling this adrenaline
Of the whiskey that's been kickin' in
I hope that this will never end, I said
In my head again
When the problems started from within
And the truth begins a sinkin' in
I'm beggin' please just make this end, yeah

OH! I gotta feel it, getting near it all
Opened up a void that was a hole
Pour it down until it warms the soul
Gotta feel it, getting near it all

Feeling far too gone for any 'socialing'
And I'm way too young to have this disease
So you think I'm wrong? Let me tell you right
How I've all but won this fight

In my head again
when I'm feeling this adrenaline
Of the whiskey that's been kickin' in
I hope that this will never end, I said
In my head again
When the problems started from within
And the truth begins a sinkin' in
I'm beggin' please just make this end, yeah

OH! I gotta feel it, getting near it all
Opened up a void that was a hole
Pour it down until it warms the soul
Gotta feel it, getting near it all (x2)

Far Too Gone

I needed everything you gave
Everyday I was wasting away
I needed...
I see it, things I threw away
Pacing the room, remember the day
I see it...
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
La,la,la,la
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Still waiting for my time to come
Patiently waiting, ready to fire 
Off....
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Yeah, I know it, I'm not fine
I'm lost in a maze, running blind
And bare false witness to these rants
I'm not in control, your command
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Someone lead me out
Far away from all this sound
Someone lead me out
Away from here, away from here
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
No feelings, your blank and dreary eyes
Never could say for certain that
You tried...
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Yeah, I know it, I'm not fine
I'm lost in a maze, running blind
And bare false witness to these rants
I'm not in control, your command
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Someone lead me out
Far away from all this sound
Someone lead me out
Away from here, away from here

Running Blind

There are scars to pay for the things you say
Leave in disarray again
Look to sky to see all the stars in sync
Leaves me contemplating
Holding on for more, slip and hit the floor
Never knew the cost of it
Now I'm laying here looking at the clear
Sky above that's coming down
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Oh, I see it coming down
Oh, it crashes all around
Yeah, the sky is falling down
Run, but everywhere I'm found 
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Waking up from a coma I put on
Stars that circle around my head
Hysteria, it's on every channel cause'
Too confused to get the bread
Push away for less, feeling nothingness
Bottomless, it never ends
Look for something more, meteor, it soars
Plummets down and that's the end
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Oh, I see it coming down
Oh, it crashes all around
Yeah, the sky is falling down
Run, but everywhere I'm found 
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Fallen down, fallen down
Tired of being the rabbit, abused
Tired of being the rabbit, used
Fallen down, fallen down
Tired of being the rabbit, abused
Tired of being the rabbit, used

METEOR

feed the silence, I'll pray for you
while I bleed again within
your knife cuts violent, the wounds are deep
and it stings the soul you need

I see a pool of black and no light
the way you stare at me with those dead eyes
turn on the energy with the right vibe
too late, you got so cold, no revive
no revive (x3), the thoughts they thrive (x3), still alive (x3), must survive (x3)

feed the silence, I'll pray for you
while I bleed again within
your knife cuts violent, the wounds are deep
and it stings the soul you need

I put you in the box you belong in
waved bye and said so long to the demons
come out from underground, it was pushing
old wounds that stitched back up, well they're open

well they're open (x3)

feed the silence, I'll pray for you
while I bleed again within 
your knife cuts violent, the wounds are deep
and it stings the soul you need

Feed the Silence

Living a life that I can't contain
I guess it's all my fault
Run through the wild with the scars I keep
They remind me of where I'm from
--------------------------------------------------------
Oh, numb my mind / I've lost my sight
So come at night / And taste a bite
--------------------------------------------------------
Scratch away from the skin
You said you wanted to go again
Well now it's time to sink or swim
Oh, my words are running thin
In a river full of lies
Yeah, the truth comes out in time
By that time, I hope your wise
Until then, you're running blind
--------------------------------------------------------
Reaching for things that I can't hold onto
I'm losing all my grip
Sailing the sea on half a plank
I'm on a sinking ship
--------------------------------------------------------
Oh, let me in / Inside your mind
You're still right here / You've lost the fight
So give right in / Oh, sink or swim
You have no choice / Oh, in the end
--------------------------------------------------------
*cheesy drum roll i made on fl studio*
--------------------------------------------------------
Scratch away from the skin
You said you wanted to go again
Well now it's time to sink or swim
Oh, my words are running thin
In a river full of lies
Yeah, the truth comes out in time
By that time, I hope your wise
Until then, you're running blind

Sink or Swim

Blackout nights in my car numbing the pain
Still cannot drink away my mind from me
Strayed lines, distancing, put me in my place
Remnants, a distant voice, screaming at me
-------------------------------------------------------------
Pour it out from the start and mend a broken heart
From the liars and the fools you betrayed
See it all from the lens, the vision fades again
From the higher serotonin thugs at play
-------------------------------------------------------------
Blackout nights in my car numbing the pain
Still cannot drink away my mind from me
Strayed lines, distancing, put me in my place
Remnants, a distant voice, screaming at me
-------------------------------------------------------------
My vision was dim but the stakes were high
And I wasn't fit for this kind of life
For this kind of life, well the streams run dry
And the water that ran, well it turned to ice (x2)
-------------------------------------------------------------
Cauterize from the end, the broken heart won't mend
From the liar and the fool you've become
Cuttin' ties like you said, a twist of fate ahead
From the karma coming back to hunt you down
-------------------------------------------------------------
Blackout nights in my car numbing the pain
Still cannot drink away my mind from me
Strayed lines, distancing, put me in my place
Remnants, a distant voice, screaming at me

Blackout Nights

I deleted this one earlier this year for whatever reason. But It's here to stay now.

Well it's a dud, caught in the middle of I know you should
You said you would, not counting stitches at the end of it
And there you go, there you go
It's just for show, it's just for show
--------------------------------------------------------
And if I say tomorrow, I'm burning down a bridge
You see the flames of sorrow and breathe the ashes
Cause' it's a dud, ah held on when you knew you could
You lost your foot, ah and fell from where you stood
From where you stood
--------------------------------------------------------
Well, in a nutshell, you're everything I thought you were
And standing sun, toss it in and let it burn
And there you go, there you go
It's just for show, it's just for show
--------------------------------------------------------
And if I say tomorrow, I'm burning down a bridge
You see the flames of sorrow and breathe the ashes
Cause' it's a dud, ah held on when you knew you could
You lost your foot, ah and fell from where you stood
From where you stood

Counting Stitches

I know, I know I'm not enough
Bring back the feeling of the love
Too numb to ever feel it stung from you
In time, I know I'll be okay
Just gotta take it day by day
You were always there to pave the way for me
------------------------------------------------
All feeling gone from the way that you are
All limbs are numb and the things that I touch
------------------------------------------------
Well, I'm holding up traffic too much
All of this is on my clutch
Not in the mood for another fight
All these arguements are blind
------------------------------------------------
I know, I know I'm not enough
Bring back the feeling of the love
Too numb to ever knew it stung
Short end, I always seem to get
Wishbone, it breaks before I twist
And now you don't know I exist, well fine
------------------------------------------------
All feeling gone from the way that you are
All limbs are numb and the things that I touch
------------------------------------------------
Well, I'm holding up traffic too much
All of this is on my clutch
Not in the mood for another fight
All these arguements are blind
------------------------------------------------
Waiting in the sunset for someone
To come and save me from the place, I'm done
Hearing voices, static radio
I'm waiting till' I travel down the road

Not Enough

In the cuckoo cell, life was all but well
I could hardly tell why I've fallen dead-alive, dead-alive
So much show and tell, hard explaining tale
Bread crumbs on the trail of my fading spotlight, it's dim tonight
------------------------------------------------------------------------- 
Hey, hey, hey
I'm a little strange, strange, strange
I know I'm not sane, sane, sane
Tell me it's okay
Hey, hey, hey
From this ounce of pain, pain, pain
Comes this sense of shame, shame, shame
Tell me it's okay
------------------------------------------------------------------------- 
In the cuckoo cell (x4)
If the truth would be told from these lies, getting old
In a world full of full of shame / Spread the lies, game you play
Ah yeah
See no gain but there's pain / Bleeding out, claim to fame
If the truth would be told from these lies, getting old
In the cuckoo cell (x4)
------------------------------------------------------------------------- 
Hey, hey, hey
I'm a little strange, strange, strange
I know I'm not sane, sane, sane
Tell me it's okay
Hey, hey, hey
From this ounce of pain, pain, pain
Comes this sense of shame, shame, shame
Tell me it's okay
---------------------------------------
I know, I know, oh
----------------------------------------
In the cuckoo cell, life was all but well
I could hardly tell why I've fallen dead-alive, dead-alive
So much show and tell, hard explaining tale
Bread crumbs on the trail of my fading spotlight, it's dim tonight

Cuckoo Cell

I, I don't need a sign
To protest what you're doing
To protest what you're doing
Is that alright? I'm not your kind
Cause' I, I don't follow blind
The faith in what you're leading
The faith in what you're leading
It has died, crucified, oh...
-------------------------------------------------------
Enter nothingness, throw it all away
Face of emptiness, need some regime change
So complacent with all the thoughts you keep
In too deep with this self indulging way
-------------------------------------------------------
Hide from all your lies
It's bullshit what you're saying
It's bullshit what you're saying
in my eyes you're not right
Mirror your disguise, breaking glass today
All along this time, you've been in my way
-------------------------------------------------------
Enter nothingness, throw it all away
Face of emptiness, need some regime change
So complacent with all the thoughts you keep
In too deep with this self indulging way

PROTEST

If I ever had pride in your eyes
It was the lies you said to me
That made it die inside of me
If I ever had pride in your eyes
It was the lies you said to me
That made it die inside of me
----------------------------------------------------
Hold out, it's running down my back
What I stand for in myself, I'm feeling under attack
On the edge now, on the edge now
Shut down, the peace inside of me
Inner self is all but here, it's not a pleasant scene
You see now? You see now
----------------------------------------------------
Drifting, further out
Away from your vibes that you're putting out
The bad energy, it flows
Stuck out in the storm
Caught in the rampage that you have poured on
Me now, me now
----------------------------------------------------
If I ever had pride in your eyes
It was the lies you said to me
That made it die inside of me
If I ever had pride in your eyes
It was the lies you said to me
That made it die inside of me
----------------------------------------------------
Prides gone from the way
You always beat me down and you do it again
I said high strung, the games you play
I always get back up just to do it again
----------------------------------------------------
Now I'm seeking solace
Inner thoughts, provoking words, I need some self defense
Secure, how? Secure, how?
Tasteless, the way you do me wrong
In myself, I'm all but here, oh yeah, I'm fucking gone
A ghost cloud, a ghost cloud
----------------------------------------------------
Drifting, further out
Away from your vibes that you're putting out
The bad energy, it flows
----------------------------------------------------
If I ever had pride in your eyes
It was the lies you said to me
That made it die inside of me
----------------------------------------------------
If I ever had pride in your eyes
It was the lies you said to me
That made it die inside of me
If I ever had pride in your eyes
It was the lies you said to me
That made it die inside of me
----------------------------------------------------
Prides gone from the way
You always beat me down and you do it again
I said high strung, the games you play
I always get back up just to do it again

p r i d e

Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/album/307c6N3b6CwsZXhmg6B0vN?si=0_P5lwTDTHmh5uDBH8-3jA

Well I can't help myself, I'm going through this hell
The scars that's on my liver's from this medicine
Well I can't help myself, I'm going through this hell
The scars that's on my liver's from this medicine
My medicine, my medicine
My medicine, my medicine
-------------------------------------------------------
I got scars on my liver from this banquet drink
A honey on my mind, she don't feel the same
Running from my thoughts cause' they all cause pain
Tryin' to forget, so I drink it away
Yeah, I drank a fifth of liquor cause' I gotta keep sane
But you always gotta haunt me with your toxic traits
I'll drink it away, I'll drink it away, I'll drink it away
What have I done wrong to be shackled to your scars?
And your insecurities poking at me like a cattle prod
What have I done wrong to be shackled to your scars?
And your insecurities poking at me like a cattle prod
I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I'm not enough
-------------------------------------------------------
Well I can't help myself, I'm going through this hell
The scars that's on my liver's from this medicine
Well I can't help myself, I'm going through this hell
The scars that's on my liver's from this medicine
My medicine, my medicine
My medicine, my medicine
-------------------------------------------------------
Going on ten long years, I tried
Now I feel myself has died
All those lonely nights I cried
I wanted a girl that would ride or die
Waging war inside my mind
But now we've run all out of time
Hold you up like a star, you'd shine
But now you're damned, no light of mine
My medicine, this heavy sin
You're fuck ups got me fucked up in the head again
My medicine, my medicine
-------------------------------------------------------
Well I can't help myself, I'm going through this hell
The scars that's on my liver's from this medicine
Well I can't help myself, I'm going through this hell
The scars that's on my liver's from this medicine
My medicine, my medicine
My medicine, my medicine

Liver Damage [feat. Kyle Updyke]

Electric guitar is absent --- Bass and Acoustic lead the way .
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I wish you were the one that could
Bring up the sun, instead
You bring out the dark and soot
Am I good enough for you? Am I good enough for you?
Put on a front, I hide
What's killing me most inside
Oh, I stay to myself, "I'm fine"
Is what I'd say to you, am I good enough for you?

Say that you'll be mine
Well you lied, well you lied
I tend to stay aside
While you try to be some kind

You were the one that would
Bring up the sun, instead
You bring out the dark and soot
Am I good enough for you? Am I good enough for you?

Say that you'll be mine
Well you lied, well you lied
I tend to stay aside
While you try to be some kind

All done, it's out there
And everything inside is just alright
Far from complete here
That's okay, I'm still alive, I fight
I fight

You were the one that could
Bring up the sun, instead
Oh, I stay to myself, "I'm fine"
Is what I'd say to you, am I good enough for you?

Some Kind

What have I done wrong today
To make you feel right?
Pleasing all my enemies
No one here's a friend of me
Push away the ones who stay
Keep no one in sight
Alone is where I wanna be
The silence gets the best of me
---------------------------------------------
Shut it out, just shut it out
In this cesspool starting to sprout
 ---------------------------------------------
Cutting off from everything
And everyone outside
I'm so much more at peace with me
A lonesome soul here spiritually
The toxic social manifest
Of new century
It's only getting worse at best
A cesspool growing petri dish 
---------------------------------------------
Shut it out, just shut it out
In this cesspool starting to sprout
This lack of substance gaining ground
So shut it out, just shut it out
---------------------------------------------
Solitary in confined
The mental clarity
Away from all the trendy things
That people will regurgitate
---------------------------------------------
Shut it out, just shut it out
In this cesspool starting to sprout
This lack of substance gaining ground
So shut it out, just shut it out

Enemies

A song I recorded back in late 2018/early 2019. Deleted for whatever reason. The section of intense vocals toward the end of this song I've used in another song called "Losing It" which I may re-record in the future. So be on the lookout for that familiar ending. Enjoy.

On the Raid

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2017

Fade Away

Comatose

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High on a Shelf

Brand new track! 1/20/2018

DL for $1 here: http://noisealter.bandcamp.com/track/digging-deep

Digging Deep

Into Gray

The Bottom

I Don't Care

the man & the myth

listen to me on spotify! https://open.spotify.com/artist/2lpUD7w9lZVrQHUgpkbnQ1?si=SI7d7ejSQGGTBFKrdPu0TA

Echos

The More Things Change, the More They Stay the Same

Somewhere South

made for someone in particular.... you know who you are.

Toxic Ways

Memories

God damn, you're so cold / Everyone that you touch
Well they just freeze, freeze
A heart of stone / Molten by the devil 
Your hatred made them leave, leave
Rebel souls, come my way / Stranglehold
It the motion of the world falling down
Crumble to the ground again, to the ground it ends
Expectations of a life full of love
Everything has died inside / To the hell, divide
See your colors fade / Hazy like the gray in your eyes
Yeah, you have changed, changed
Never sane / The chemical imbalance in your mind
Made you hate, hate
Rebel souls, come my way / Stranglehold
It the motion of the world falling down
Crumble to the ground again, to the ground it ends
Expectations of a life full of love
Everything has died inside / To the hell, divide

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