This is the first Ornate Coalmine EP and it is entitled 'Prawn Cocktail For McAvennie'. Some notes:

- Jazz puns to be considered neither big, nor clever, yet here we are.

- The titular McAvennie is Frank McAvennie, the Scottish playboy footballer from the 1980s with a colourful background and the last person on the planet to still maintain a working AOL email address.

- Frank appears in the song 'Trucker of the Year'. The song is a 95% truthful recollection of a day in 1987 that a band member experienced as a 9 year old, where his father competed in the finals of a truck driving competition run by a popular tabloid newspaper, which you should not buy. He came fourth.

- It is hard to predict what event, or series of events, will eventually drive people to the point of torches and pitchforks. Could it, for example, be related to artificial grass or the prevalence of the obscene double cab pickup?

- I am not Damo Suzuki. I am not Mark E. Smith. I am Coleen Rooney.

- Many thanks and praise be to Tommy Binks who produced these recordings.

The Lads Were Fuming

Turf War

Trucker Of The Year

Terminally self-important Sheffield 4 piece melodic art rock shouters, relating tales of troubled TV funny-men, massively online main characters and tabloid endorsed truck driving contests. Drums, bass, guitars and synth. Loud, sometimes hypnotic, occasionally understated, although quite often not

Peter Merrett - Synth
Ed Piper - Guitar / Vocals
Thom Sullivan - Bass
Andrew Wood - Drums / Vocals