maybe i'm ugly
maybe i'm boring
maybe i can't stay out til 5 in the morning
but i'd never stall you
or leave you alone
begging in tears
"baby, please come home"

i don't know if you'll ever realize
the damage you've done to me and my folks
everyone can see you're having fun
running from it all
move out all your clothes
filling your nose

so maybe i'm ugly
but i know you're wrong
for treating me badly
you ruined our love
but it's good you're having fun

maybe i’m ugly

honey, you surround me
just like bees in the swarm of your love
i've twenty broken arms now
a centipede you keep under your rug

flyswatter love
strike so soft
feels like a kiss
when we talk
and you left a mark on me
like no one
but i prefer the bruise

flying above me
unafraid of the height of you now
i'm lying on your floor, babe
i'll stay here until you sweep me out

flyswatter love
lightning buzz
screen door slams
open it up
and you left it out for me
the sugary stuff
and i prefer to use

flyswatter luv

if i kill myself, will you get all my parts
that i auditioned for when you were in his arms?
you were joaquin phoenix, a river above my heart
said you been there once
now you been there twice
now it's three times
now the car won't start

they say that washer fluid
tastes like mountain dew and
maybe i should do it
maybe i should do it

they say an actor does what an actor needs to do
so if i starve myself maybe i can play the fool
cause i read my lines and they all call out to you
with a kubrick stare, now i'm out montclair
they all clap when we leave the room
alone

now the crew is all buzzin'
lotta handshakes and hugging
they go home to their families
what if i want a family?

thank god you bore me a little
long pause cause you're caught in the middle of it

mountain dew

i'm letting the sun in
where all of your stuff is
i guess where it once was
it's all gone now

if life is a blessing
i'm caught in it's netting
cause god isn't getting
all my calls now

i wanted our baby
to look like you, waving
in pictures you gave me
you're all dolled out

i'm left with your fragrance
on pillows and blankets
it's hard not to panic
they'll all wash out

and what about new friends?
do they calm you down?
it's better to know you
than to have you around

i don't live up in your heart no more
don't pay rent no more
never needed me anyway

it’s better 2 know u

haves/halve/half

i want to see your nissan
wrapped tight around a street sign
that i will drive by tonight

i want to see him reach down
for the passenger seatbelt
as you careen through the trees like a knife

i want to see you lied there
on the concrete divider
so you can watch as the life leaves his eyes

i want to see his parents
wipe blood from his hair, wet
while the police pull his body aside

i wouldn't piss your fire out again
i want to see the car lights ahead
i want to feel alive, i forget...
won't piss to put the-
it's gone to your head

crash (1996)

memories are leaking through
molly water, attitude, i- i-
won't fill those holes in your head

carbon copy, kettle on
could pick you out a catalogue, i- i-
can't keep your confidence fed

careful who you're speaking to
cc: me your point of view, i- i-
leave all your messages read

the good in you is avalon
cctv camera logs, i- i-
know that you're fucking my friends

man on the run
reddit, wonderwall
shit ain't worth the call
cigarettes, toronto
a whiter rhino
i write the ride home
i wipe the "why tho?"
i wipe the "why?"

freaky friday, seven one
punish me for moving on, i- i-
don't know what all that's about

paint you over, paint it blue
drywall on your tennis shoes, i- i-
can see a trail from the house

mock my record, look at you
talking when i leave the room, i- i-
don't see that gift in your mouth

won't argue with the vagabond
bundled up in camouflage, i- i-
don't need that rise from you now

man on the run
reddit, wonderwall
shit ain't worth the call
cigarettes, toronto
a whiter rhino
i write the ride home
i wipe the "why tho?"
i wipe the "why?"

sitting 'round waiting for apologies
but you're nothing but a coward
in a calvary of rodents
so go dance your life away

the entire history of you (2011)

empathy knot (001) "most times, i go back to sleep"
a radio show hosted by jackie tailgater

featuring:

gal costa - nao identificado
dijon - offering
young fathers - tell somebody
hong kong express - flirtations
john k. samson - virtute at best
the sweet enoughs - cabin days
mount eerie - moon sequel
povarovo - methro nome
runnner - bike again
damien rice - your astronaut
dan reeder - the tulips on the table
otto a. totland - bluss
skullcrusher - you are my house
daniel avery - first light
outside hire - the entire history of you (2011)
tango for 3 - milonga del angel
outside hire - crash (1996)
mid-air thief - why?
searows - coming clean
corbin - early/quiet
oh shu, bioman - aeroporto di bologna
honeybus - do i figure in your life?

and you...

Empathy Knot: Episode One

empathy knot (002) “on loving mister lonely”
a radio show hosted by jackie tailgater

featuring:

everything but the girl - get me
jime e. stack - a man can’t know what it’s like to be a mother
shrimp - this body means nothing to me
ghost orchard - cursive
hilary woods - sever
leith ross - everyone i’ve never met
bright eyes - contrast and compare
rival consoles - recovery
glendale avenue - eternal sunshine (2004)
niel johnston - some things last a long time
ethan gruska - haiku4u (feat. lianne la havas)
angelo de augustine - it’s a life
pharmakon - sentient
(c.s.lewis - the four loves)
injury reserve - top picks for you
susumu yokota - circular
heavy body - old joy (2006)
casiotone for the painfully alone - bobby malone
billie holiday - solitude
shigeru umebayashi - 2046 main theme
serengeti - king bed
another michael - new music
bobby hutcherson - manzanita
(kenneth rexroth - marthe lonely)
labi siffre - bless the telephone

and you…

Empathy Knot: Episode Two

white heat

i will wear four dresses
look different
i will look less pretty
boy talk boy talk boy boy talk
i like the way you boy talk

there's a happening held between zippers
you love me

boytalk

a swimmer body with the youtube comment 
 a new bugatti in the wheelchair parking 
 an orange cut-out in a racists pocket 
 a glitter party with a no-show on it 

 it's a problem if you make me do it 
 i'm a conduit for the 'can't lose' 
 for the camcorder pilot in the new shoes 
 goons, killing children with the sky blue 
 sky mall, gun shots, bad cop 
 bet you'll catch a couple bodies up at walmart 
 bet you're feeling right picasso with your con-art 
 bet you're jerking off officials with the wrong arm 
 all lefty, poncho, don't check me 
 encore gone all hefty, don't test me 
 i've got nothing left to lose 
 bitch

bully26

perished my first time doing this 
 fell asleep at the wheel 
 forced my face through the glass in front of you 
 i spilled out 'cross the field 

 and you need me to give you a reason to let go 
 and i have nothing to give you

first time driver

i should be ending my life
but i'm not ready
i've got things to pass on
like a second name
but the rest of it's bad
and i don't see the point of it,
of walking things back
with a garbage hand
the rest just look down
i'm just a charming wrecking ball
to hang 'round your neck,
or your futon
but me and my dad
communicating better now
that's my greatest friend
i want that for me
but i don't have the funds
no fun, not for anyone, yeah
but you can call me what you want
anything you want
you don't even have to call me
broke

my life is over

the neighbors dog bites at my leg again
i've had a fear of his teeth since i was a kid
soiled my jeans outside your house
i'd do anything just to hurt myself
weak-willed
back out
stuffed up
stash house
dead meat
for bad mouth
i chew cud
for us now

the neighbors dog scared all my friends away
he had a mock in his voice for me to take my life
snuck out on hospital road and ran home
tucked the chain around my neck in my work clothes
cheap thrill
cell phone
fucked up
dial tone
duct tape
mouth closed
a life lived
in dark holes

i don't want to chase my tail for a solution
i don't want to chase my tail, i want conclusion

the neighbor's dog

what can i say in a minute
that i never want to vocalize?
i feel it even heavier now
- i feel miserable

i guess i gotta work this job
til i die, or kill myself, or maybe
someone else can do that for me
- hold me over the bridge

maybe everyone i loved
has me looking backwards
i can't reach out anymore
- rear-view held over my head

it hurts to feel so depressed
and depraved, that my disorder
don't keep me from eating at all
- i'll eat all of my words

this is a warning shot
this is a call to arms
this a please just call me
minute song

MINUTE SONG

minute song

taker of lives
take mine
i've done my time
here

'pon wetted moss
all waters still
i'll state my blame
and will

i'll count down
the memories
i can't feel
anything

please halt my heart
please halt my heart
please halt my heart
please halt my heart

i may have never known god
'least i've known you
now i'll sit up on a shelf
in your living room

please help my heart
please help my heart

i would have been a good dad
i would have smiled for your camera
i would have been there for my daughter
i would have liked that

but it's all gone now
i'm ready...

i've been waiting to die my whole life

your friend until the end of time

got smoked by the soundcloud track limit
new music at @ozyhire

outsidehire

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