Golden Slumbers

Life On Mars

Be Not So Fearful

Verse 1:

When I’m old
I’ll reflect
on the lessons that I once rejected.
Resurrected
on my own lips,
so my son can live better than I did.

When I die
they will weep
for the good coulda’ been that died with me.
What they won’t see,
the real pity:

is the good that’s inside
would have withered and died,
even if I had survived to be
a hundred and sixty.

Refrain:

You may say I’m a pessimist
but I’m just an analyst,
and I get my facts from these half empty glasses.
If you say that they’re full you’re the fool.

Verse 2: 

When my heart aches
it’s a clean break
that sheds bits of dried glue and old scotch tape
(Signs of mistakes).
It’s a broke stone
that bleeds bitter black I told you so’s.

But when I find love
I’ll forget
all the lessons that made me regret love
the last time
as my laugh lines
deepen and cross
all my lines of love lost
till the hard earned hard lined look’s replaced
by a blissfully ignorant face.

(Refrain)

Bridge:

Cause whether it’s half full or three quarters down,
you know it won’t be long till the water all runs out.
Cause as temperatures rise, we all melt and dry,
and the thirst that is left
will go on unquenched.

Verse 3 :

When the world ends
I’ll repent
every ounce of the oil I spent.
God just bring back my friends.
But they’re long gone.
All my life long
I will wander this globe with a camera in tow
taking pictures of earth’s devastation,
waiting for some sign of recreation.


Half Something

Verse 1:

You got the east side
I got the west
You got the restaurants that I loved the best
You got the bitterness
I got it too
You got the heartbreak
I gave it to you.

You got the Civil Wars
I got Ben Folds
You got hurt bad by the mean lies I told
I just got meaner
And lied all the more
You got the heartbreak
I got the front door

You got the sunset
But I got the dawn
You got the fire escapes
I got a lawn
You got Manhattan
I got the North Shore
You got the heart break
And I got it more

Chorus 1:

And I get so tired
But I don't get sleep
I just lie awake thinking
Of what I would give to get back what I couldn't keep

Verse 2:

You got the Highline
From 23rd north.
You got the Village
But you left me West 4th
Girl, you got Greenport
But I got her ships
You got the heartbreak
That poured from these lips

You got the summer
And I got the cold
You got my best years
I just got old
You got the doubts that you never could kill
You got the heartbreak
I've got it still

You got your family
And I still got mine
I got to break our lease
You got the fine
You got the city
Where I never belonged
You got the heartbreak
And I got this song

Chorus 2:

You can take all the rage
You've earned it my dear
But let's share the tears
From the privacy of
These neat little pieces of love

Verse 3:

You take the east coast
I'll take the west
You take your memories
I'll put mine to rest
You take good care, love
I'll take a shot
We got the heartbreak
That's all that we got
We got the heartbreak
That's all that we got

What We Got

Verse 1:
                  
And so it began with a bang, the year of the bastard.               
The Big Dipper hung like a harbinger over my backyard.                   
The stars were aligned to remind me just who was the master,                     
And the gravity of my decisions was dragging me down.

No, it was not only the loneliness leaving me sleepless,
or the guilt for the unpunished crimes I couldn't defend.
But the sad realization that my isolation was needless
and the terrible knowledge that all this would happen again.
                      
And every heart between now and the next time
will be torn apart along all of the same lines  
I'll keep to the course, murdering without remorse.

Chorus:
                                                                   
So gut out the good,                                                  
pour in the pain.                                              
Raise a glass to the past,                                     
toast the old days again.                                       
It's sad that it's so,                                    
but you're better alone            
And you shouldn't be sharing your load.                                   
Just shoulder it, soldier,                                    
you'll feel ten years older                                                   
unhappily after                                            
the year of the bastard.

Verse 2:

From the minute I did it I knew that I couldn't escape this,
and not me nor my lovers turned enemies could ever be saved.
Like a man in a mine far from light who knows just what his fate is
I wearily pulled out my pick ax and dug my own grave.

And on my blood boiled and raged, from June through September
as my organs all withered and fell out in time for the fall.
Then winter winds blew in and froze what was left of my embers.
And in Spring from the ashes sprung unrecognizable sprouts.

And maybe by May I'll discover a new sun
to shine on my soul and grow new love from old ones.
But someday I'll harvest her heart's best and carve it to bits.

(Chorus)

Bridge:

I won’t try to make it right.
I’ll just fuck and I’ll fight and I’ll lie just to get through the night.
And I’ll idolize what’s died, what I killed long ago.       
And if by and by some accident any good comes of it                                                     
I'll gut it out, gut it out, gut it out, gut it o

Verse 3:

So it went out like a lamb, the year of the bastard,
or a wolf in sheep's clothing that never strays far from the flock.
And every good day just seems to slide by a bit faster
till my happy heart racing becomes a cold race 'gainst the clock.

But maybe I'll learn from my mistakes at last
learn to forge a new future and forgo the past.
But a bastard I've been, and a bastard I will be in time
And the year of the bastard is mine.

Chorus

The Year Of The Bastard

The Wreck

Verse 1

Walking by the water side
With Nancy Whiskey hand-in-hand
I heard by chance an old sailor man
Who was likewise nigh to drunk to stand
   
He said now son my time has come
And I must sell my sailing ship
I loved her dear for some fifty years
But now I take that fateful trip

To Fiddler’s Green
She can’t come with me
Give me the gold so I can see her sold to a boy who still has dreams

Refrain:

Storms fill the sails, but let em blow
When the squall's on deck don't run below
Hold fast to the mast let the devil blow past
And tip your flask, toast "Tally-I-oh!"
Tip your flask, toast "Tally-I-oh!"

Verse 2

We sealed the deal and I checked her keel
And found it home to rodent’s nests
Her rudder was broke, her sails a joke
And lines all threadbare, bad at best.

So I got my tacks and tar
And started working on her dawn till dusk
And spent my nights by candlelight
Nailing planks onto her withered husk

My woman wept
Cause I never slept
With her no more, her pleas ignored
I guess that’s why she left

(Refrain)

Verse 3

It was getting near some
Fifteen years 
Before I stowed my tar and tacks.
Of course by then my woman and
The whole damn town had turned their backs.

But never mind I cast my lines
And headed for the Spanish Main
But God above repaid my love
By sending me a hurricane

Back to the docks
Smashed on the rocks
My ship had crashed, my dreams were dash
By some avenging God

(Refrain)

Verse 4:

But I say to thee
Don't pity me
For I have better spent my time
Then other men 
who lie locked to land
And likewise dream their dreams confined

But that's not you 
I see it's true 
A boy like you can raise some hell
So buy my wreck
Well bring her back
And bring the old days back as well

We'll sail away
Head for the days
All gone and past,
Returned at last
Let legends sing our praise

(Refrain)

The Wreck

A song written in December when I began to realize that sometimes you don't get closure or second chances or a chance to say you were wrong.  Sometimes you just have to swallow it and get on with your life.  And if you can't do it for your own sake, do it for theirs, or else all that assholery was for nothing.  At least if you dedicate yourself to being a better person and avoiding all those same stupid mistakes, some good can come from bad.  There's redemption in that.

Verse 1:

Another cold day,
But I shiver and put on a bold face.
I’m just doing my time like the old days.
On an exile island of penitent men.

It’s the same
As every day since I came here
And I spend my time thinking of last year
But it’s holding me back living half in the past.
To say I’ve made mistakes would be to understate
At the cost of my conscience, my fortune and fate
But it wasn’t in vain if I don’t make the same ones again.

Refrain:

There’s not much I can do to undo what I’ve done
There’s not much I can say cause I say it all wrong
There’s the man that I am and the man that I was
And the man that I’m trying to be.
I won’t do it for you, I can’t do it for me,
But I’ll try to do better for Brittany.

Verse 2:

Playing parts.
Give me gold stars to stick on my wall chart.
Still a long way but off to a good start,
And I’m starting to see where these efforts might lead.

There’s redemption
Down the yellow brick road of intentions.
Good as gold but detoured by deception.
It’s so easy to stray, I keep losing the way.

But for every wrong turn and bridge that I burn
There’s a bright light that shines off the lessons I’ve learned,
And I’ll follow it back to the straight narrow path once again.

Refrain

Bridge:

And sometimes the vision’s as clear as the day,
But it just goes to show that it’s so far away.
And every hill that I climb leaves you further behind.
So you’ll never know that you showed me this road.

Verse 3:

I regret
Every terrible thing that I said.
And for once if I could I would take it all back
But that’s done and you’re gone so I have to move on
And put all these apologies into my songs.
So though you’ll never know I swear some day I’ll show
How a man can make right from his wrongs.

Refrain


Better for Brittany

I'm a big fan of Ben Kweller.   Two of my favorite songs by him have always been:

Falling: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o4K-SPnZJOU
Until I die: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6hgs5nNJT3c

My friend Chris always tells me the latter is a lamer version of the former.  One night we were rum drunk and I was playing "Until I Die," and he started singing "Falling" over it to stress his point.  We both came to the sudden realization that it sounded awesome.

So here it is, sans Chris.  All credits to Ben Kweller and Sony...or whomever owns him.


Falling 'til I Die

My name is Francis Pastorelle, and I'm a ukulele enthusiast. I'm currently a solo act, but looking to join a band in the Lane County area.  My music is ukulele-based, with harmonica support.  I do covers and originals, and am always looking for new people to jam with!

Francis Pastorelle

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